Sun, Moon, and Stars
by lil-anon
Summary: Eleanor has spent her whole life caught between two worlds. The balancing act had been relatively easy up to a point, but with a war starting, her sense of identity shifting, and new feelings arising, the act might not be as simple as she once thought. Who can you cling to when your world begins to spiral?
1. Chapter 1

**Just a quick note:** This is my first story that I've uploaded. I've been working on this bad boy for a few years now off and on and just never had the guts to post, so I'm trying to be brave here and just go for it. I've got a lot of it written already, and still a lot more to go. Most chapters won't be this long, and they also won't jump around so much but I really just wanted to set the characters and the background for this story before getting into the plot. Thanks so much!

* * *

Under the dark sky walked a man who had made a terrible mistake. In his arms he held a problem, and a baby; the baby also happened to be his problem. His hands were shaking. He was panicked, his pale face was shiny with sweat. He clutched his precious cargo tighter, hoping that holding the bundle against his chest might calm his rapidly beating heart. It didn't help like he thought it would. He looked down at the sleeping infant in his arms. His heart ached at the thought of him leaving her. Just three weeks old and she already looked so like him. He stared at the great iron gates and almost turned back. He couldn't leave her here. He would find any excuse not to. The moment anything seemed wrong, he would turn and run.

Without him having to make his presence known, the tall gate swung open. He expected to see a small, skittish House Elf welcoming him to the large estate but instead he saw a tall, smiling man and a tearful woman.

"Hello, welcome." She said graciously, grabbing her guest's bags and eyeing the sleeping baby carefully. "Is this her?" She seemed almost desperate with happiness at the sight of the young child.

"Darling, let's go inside. It's dark and cold out here." The tall man guided his wife and their guest towards the house, though his eyes were also glued to the tiny infant.

"Where are all of your House Elves?" The man asked as the husband and wife opened their home to him. "I'm sorry, that was the wrong thing to say. You have to forgive me, the past few weeks have been…" He trailed off and nodded at the bundle in his arms.

"Completely understandable, sir." The husband nodded. "We actually don't keep House Elves. We feel it is inhumane and we are really quite capable of managing this place on our own."

"We would raise her with those same values." The wife put in quickly, her brown eyes searched the father's face. He looked down at his daughter. _His daughter_. They wanted her too. But his heart told him not to give her up.

"Olga, please, let the man breathe." The husband chided his wife softly.

"No, it's fine." The father sighed. "It's what I'm here for."

"Only give her up if you feel it is what you want." The wife, Olga, told him. She didn't believe it, she wanted that baby with all of her heart, mind and soul. She was desperate, and just seeing a glimpse of the small thing's face was enough to make her fall in love.

"It is what's best." The man sighed. "I can't-I can't raise her. Not properly, not safely. I just-she needs to go to a good family, a good home."

"We'll be that." Olga perked up. "Darius and I, we will be good parents. We have a good name. Good standing with the Ministry. We're very well off." Olga was desperate to prove their worthiness.

"Olga, stop." Darius said gently.

"Your family, you're a Pureblood family." The father stated. "She isn't a Pureblood. You won't discriminate against her?"

"Of course not," Olga jumped quickly.

"But, you must be aware that we are giving her our name. The three of us would be the only ones who know that she isn't actually our daughter." Darius stepped in.

"So she'll be raised off a lie?"

"Did you really think there was another way?" Olga asked gently. "We wrote up a contract, sir. When she comes of age, we'll tell her, or if something happens to us, she will be left with all of this information. It will be up to her if she wants to see you, though."

"No arranged marriages." The father stated firmly. "I know Pureblood families are big on those."

Olga and Darius laughed a little. "Not really, they are a bit archaic, even for the oldest families." The father held his daughter closer and took a slight step back. "But of course we won't. We'll see it is put in the contract. Would you like to come into our office and see it?"

The father nodded once and the three adults retreated behind more closed doors and read over the contract. It all seemed fair, and it all seemed good.

"How do I know that you aren't involved with You-Know-Who?" He was looking for any reason to not leave his daughter here. His daughter that he already loved so much. Olga and Darius both lifted their sleeves to reveal their lack of marks.

"We strive to walk down the middle. Remain neutral." Darius said gently.

"But you come from a Slytherin family." The father pointed out.

"Not all Slytherins are evil." Olga said with a small chuckled.

"I know that." The father snapped back quickly. "You just have all the makings of Death Eaters."

"That isn't the first time we have heard that." Darius said.

"And it doesn't change anything about us. We don't believe in the fight." Olga continued.

He was trying to catch them on anything that would stop him from handing over his daughter, his precious gift. He knew she would do well here, he knew she would grow up well. He knew he couldn't take care of her.

"What if she isn't in Slytherin?"

"Then I hope she will be true to her heritage, _your _heritage." Darius smiled, putting a hand on the father's shoulder. Under Darius' firm grip, the father crumpled and began to cry.

"I can't take care of her." He sobbed. "I want to, you probably think I am terrible."

"Sir," Olga began, "would you like to see her room?" He nodded slowly, and walked up the stairs with the couple, tears falling from his eyes and onto the yellow blanket that wrapped his daughter so securely. He tried not to notice the contract and a quill in Darius' hand. This walk was the last time he would see his daughter, and he knew it.

The room was huge, and beautifully decorated. It wasn't a tacky spew of pinks and purples, which he was afraid of. Everything was grey and yellow and white. Very appealing to the eye. There were toys and a beautiful crib and rocking chairs and a changing table. There was a bathroom and a fireplace and a large closet.

"She'll grow up in here." Olga said, smiling at the nursery that would turn playroom that would turn safe haven as the girl grew.

The father tried to imagine the three week old infant growing and running around the room. Dancing and playing and laughing and crying and growing, growing older, growing bigger. Growing without him there.

"I've taken to calling her Eleanor, after her mother." The father said, looking at his beautiful daughter, tears flowing down his face.

"W-we were going to call her Selene." Olga said quietly. "After the Greek goddess of the moon."

The father laughed at the irony of it, and shook his head. "Please, Eleanor. Her mother isn't...around." He choked on his tears a little. "Let her carry that namesake."

Darius took a step towards him. "Eleanor it is."

Defeated, and devastated, the father let go of his daughter and Olga scooped her up quickly. Crying furiously, the father signed away his daughter, his only true love. He waited a moment too long before Disapparating. Right before disappearing into thin air, his daughter woke, and their blue eyes met one last time.

He appeared on the steps of his best friend's home, needing comfort and needing to let the past year of his life off of his chest. The door swung open.

"Lily," He breathed out, tears barreling down his cheeks. Lily was very pregnant, probably only weeks from having a baby of her own.

"Are you alright?" She asked, wrapping him in her arms. "James!" She called for her husband, who came rushing to the door.

"What's gotten into you man?" James asked, bringing his best friend into his living room.

"I've made a terrible mistake. A huge mistake." He wailed, holding James by the collar and sobbing into his shoulder while Lily soothingly rubbed his back. "I let her go, I gave her up. I couldn't take care of her. I hurt her mother. James, I shouldn't be alive. James, I'm a monster." He sobbed loudly.

"What? Back up, what are you talking about?" James asked, grabbing his friend by his shoulders.

"It was an accident. She came over, she didn't know. She didn't know what I was."

"Remus," Lily pulled him back. "Remus, calm down." She demanded. Her heart hurt for him, but hysteria was bad for everyone involved. It took a few minutes of sobbing and heavy breathing, but finally, composure was gained.

"There was a woman. A muggle. She...her and I...we…" He trailed off, wiping his eyes with his sleeves.

"So that's why you've been acting strange, you've been shagging a girl." James said in a light voice. Lily glared menacingly at her husband over the slumped figure of their friends, but Remus let out a chuckle.

"Yeah. She got pregnant, and we had a daughter."

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Lily demanded. "That's something you tell people."

"She was going to take care of the baby anyway, I-I wasn't going to be involved. I couldn't be." Remus stammered out.

"Where are they now, Remus?" Lily asked gently.

"She came over during a full moon one night. She didn't know. I told her not to come. I-I-" Remus began crying again and slumped into Lily. Lily and James looked at their friend and each other with concern.

"Remus, what happened to her?" Lily rubbed his back as he sobbed.

"I hurt her, Lily. I attacked her. She was unconscious when I came to in the morning. I took her to St. Mungo's, they saved the baby, but they had to wipe her memories after she healed. She is out there, somewhere, not knowing how she got those scars and not knowing she has a daughter."

"But she is alright, mate." James said. "Where is the little angel then?" James asked, trying to lighten the mood by talking about something happier.

"I gave her to the Cordarris. They have been faking pregnancy for a few months now. They were desperate, so was I." Remus was exhausted, and heartbroken and his friends could see it.

"Cordarri?" Lily played with the name, trying to remember where she had heard it before.

"Old, Pureblood, Slytherin family. She will be raised with a good name, in a good home." James made a noise of disapproval as he brought his friend a drink. "They are good people, James. I couldn't raise her, you know that."

"We would've helped." James said quietly.

"Things are a little busy here too, wouldn't you say?" Remus retorted, nodding towards Lily's large bump. "And besides, they aren't caught in the crossfire during this war. No matter which way it ends up, my daughter will be safe from scorn and defeat."

"I wish you had told us, we would've helped." Lily whispered to her friend.

"This is what is best." Remus nodded, though his heart was absolutely broken. "Please, you can't tell anyone."

James and Lily shared a look, saying a million things with a glance. "We won't." They promised in unison.

* * *

As the war raged on, and Remus lost all of his friends, he missed his precious daughter more than he ever imagined he would. But while Remus' heart grew heavier by the day, and he grew weary and depressed, his daughter grew in grace and kindness and charm.

She was undoubtedly the kindest child most of her parent's friends had ever seen-something that surprised next to none of the Cordarri's friends, as they were the kindest two people most anyone had come across. Olga and Darius were good people in their very cores, and they raised Eleanor to be their likeness. Of course, Eleanor was like them in nearly every sense except looks. While both Olga and Darius had deep brown eyes, Eleanor had bright blue ones. And everyone expected the baby to be blonde, like both of her parents, but her tufts grew into long, thick, brown locks. She was rather short and stocky in comparison to her two tall, lanky parents. Her face was round, decorated with her dainty, turned up nose and plump lips, whereas her parents both had sharp, thin faces. All of them were rather pale, and that seemed to be their only similarity. Olga and Darius were constantly fearful that their differences would be cause for concern among their friends, but if their friends had any doubts about Eleanor's true ancestry, they didn't say.

After the fall of the Dark Lord, the Malfoy family found comfort and solace in the overflowing kindness and understanding that the Cordarri family offered. Olga and Darius knew of Narcissa and Lucius' pains and felt for them. One night, when both Draco and Eleanor were not even two years old, Olga and Darius invited all of the Malfoys for dinner. They were skittish and timid people then; so afraid of judgement and scorn, but Olga and Darius offered nothing but friendship, which the couple gladly took. They couldn't find this kind of acceptance anywhere.

"I would bet on my life they were meant to be Hufflepuffs." Lucius confided in his wife once they left the Coradarris after their first dinner together.

"What would it matter, Lucius?" Narcissa asked, holding her nearly two year old son, trying to get him to go to sleep. "They were kind to us, they did not judge us. They offer up friendship, something we both need after all of this nonsense. Most of our friends are dead or in prison. My sister is rotting away in Azkaban. It's over, Lucius. We need to move on, and Olga and Darius are giving us an opportunity."

"I'm not trying to judge them, Cis." Lucius told his wife gently. He wanted to comment on how he had never once felt that he was truly welcomed with open arms except by Olga and Darius, but he refrained.

And so, from then on, Lucius and Narcissa clung to Darius and Olga furiously. Olga and Darius grew to love the Malfoys with an equal amount of ferocity. It was a truly amazing bond. While the Malfoys were still the Malfoys, they still had their flaws, but they were gentler people. They still tripped up, they still held their son to unreasonable expectations, they were still sharp and aggressive, but everyone found them more tolerable to be around.

* * *

"Daddy!" A six year old Eleanor screamed out. Her shrill voice whistled throughout the hallways of the Cordarri Castle, and caused Darius to come running to his daughter's aid. What he saw could have made him laugh out loud. Eleanor had her small, chubby arms crossed across her chest and her eyes were menacing, staring daggers at her best friend: a currently frightened Draco Malfoy.

"What is it, sweetheart?" He asked gently.

"Draco said a dirty word. The 'M' word. You told me never to say it, and Draco said it." Eleanor began yelling angrily. Darius looked at Draco for a moment, who looked ashamed and scared of his best friend's wrath, which he had not seen until this moment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know it was a bad word. Father says it all the time, I just thought it was normal." Draco explained quickly, tears bubbling in his eyes. Darius tried not to let it show how saddened he was at his friend's language.

"Do you know what that word means, Draco?" Darius asked slowly, he wasn't accusatory, and he kneeled down to Draco's level so that they could communicate as equals.

"Dirty blood," Draco said shyly, "I don't know what that means."

"When that word is used, Draco, it is to be really mean to someone whose parents aren't wizards. If you want to be a nice person, and a good friend, you can't call someone by a mean name. What if you went around calling Eleanor names?"

"Eleanor is my friend." Draco stated, looking at his still steaming playmate.

"Exactly, you wouldn't call her names, right?" Darius asked, Draco rapidly shook his head. "So why would you call someone else names? It is important that everyone is treated like a friend, treated kindly."

"Father says that Purebloods are the best kind of wizard." Draco informed Darius.

"Eleanor, why don't you tell Draco what you, mummy and I have been talking about together?" Darius invited, pulling his beloved daughter towards her friend. Eleanor sucked in a deep breath and looked Draco dead in the eye.

"We are Pureblood by accident, friend by choice." She recited perfectly, her father smiled at her widely.

"What does that mean?" Draco asked.

"It means," Darius supplemented, "that you don't get to choose how you were born, but you can choose to be nice to everyone."

* * *

Two eleven year olds clad in knit sweaters and pants sat outside the large Malfoy Manor, just outside the gardens. There were so many adults inside and it got crowded and warm very quickly. They were all talking of their children at Hogwarts.

"I can't believe we are gonna be there in September." The blond boy smiled at his friend. She was not so enthusiastic. She nervously played with the end of her braid and made a sound of acknowledgement. "Aren't you excited?" Draco pressed.

"What house do you suppose you'll be in?" She asked suddenly, dropping her braid and making eye contact with her friend.

"Slytherin, I expect." Draco answered, "You too, probably. Your whole family has been a line of Slytherins."

"What if that isn't enough?" Eleanor asked anxiously, her blue eyes searching his for comfort. "I mean, I'm not like a Slytherin at all, really. What will they all say?" She asked, nodding her head towards the room full of wizards talking about their glory days and Slytherin House Pride.

"I think you're quite Slytherin actually." Draco said. "You're very witty and charming, obviously. But you also are very focused on what you want. My mother always calls you 'a tenacious girl, if I've ever seen one'," He mimicked his mother's voice here, "you'll really do anything to get what you want."

"What if I'm put in Hufflepuff?" She whispered meekly, analyzing her friend slowly as he digested her question. Draco was careful not to show the disgust for the house she had mentioned and formulated a response.

"I don't think you will be."

"But what if I _am_?" Eleanor pressed.

"I can't see you being anywhere but Slytherin. We'll keep being friends all throughout school." Draco said with a finality that seemed to work towards comforting himself more than his friend.

"We'd still be friends even if I wasn't in Slytherin, right?" Eleanor clarified.

Draco hesitated a moment, "Well, sure." He supplied lamely.

* * *

"Did you hear the way that Potter spoke to me?" Draco seethed quietly to Eleanor as they entered the Great Hall. "How dare-"

"You were being a bit of a snob." Eleanor snapped at him, tired of her friend's complaining.

"What? How can you say that?" Draco whispered furiously to his friend, looking at her with angry eyes, completely betrayed.

"You were incredibly rude to that Weasley boy." Eleanor stated, crossing her arms and staring straight ahead, refusing to look at Draco.

"Oh come on, you saw him." Draco laughed, not believing that his friend could be so sensitive on behalf of a _Weasley_.

"I've actually met the Weasley family once, and they are very nice and wonderful people." Eleanor informed her friend.

"They breed like rats." Draco said, nose scrunched in disgust. Eleanor's mouth dropped open in horrific disgust at her friend's words.

"Maybe their parents wanted to have a lot of children because they weren't stuck with one awful one." Eleanor snapped sharply. Draco couldn't believe what she was insinuating. His heart beat wildly, angrily in his chest as he tried to formulate something to say.

"Eleanor Cordarri." Professor McGonagall called out. Eleanor walked up to the sorting hat, looking very fidgety. All her nerve was wasted on standing up to her friend. Draco wanted to feel for her, he knew how much she had been thinking about this sorting the past few months, but he was so angry at what she had said that all he wanted was for her to be as far from him as possible.

_I hope you get Gryffindor with all your precious Weasleys_, Draco thought angrily to himself as he watched the Sorting Hat debate atop his best friend's head.

_I hope you get Gryffindor and your parents hate you. _

_I hope you get Gryffindor and my parents hate you, and won't let us be friends anymore. _

_I hope we aren't friends after this, I don't ever want to be your Housemate. _

_Gryffindor, Gryffindor, imagine your parent's faces. _

_Gryffindor, imagine the disappointment among all your friends_

"GRYFFINDOR!" The Hat shouted out, Draco's heart sunk to his shoes. He didn't mean any of the things he thought, he just wanted to be in the same house as his best friend, he nervously looked around to find other people to befriend, but he knew in his heart that he wouldn't enjoy spending time with any of them as much as he did Eleanor. He wished he could take it all back. Their eyes met before Eleanor was taken away with the crowd and sat at the Gryffindor table.

"I'm Hermione Granger." Said a bushy haired girl that Eleanor sat next to.

"Eleanor Cordarri." They shook hands and exchanged encouraging smiles, and Draco already felt his best friend slipping away.

* * *

"We'd very much like to meet Hermione sometime." Darius said to his daughter, as she chatted nonstop about her new friend during her first Christmas break.

"You would love her." Eleanor assured her parents. Olga and Darius smiled as the three of them set the table. The Malfoys would be over any moment to celebrate Christmas Eve with them. It was an old tradition between the families, and one that Eleanor always looked forward to, until this year. Draco and her hadn't really spoken since their first night at Hogwarts. They would sometimes lamely smile at each other when they passed through the halls, or shared a class. Draco wouldn't make fun of her when going down the line of Harry, Ron and Hermione. He would just look at her, narrow his eyes momentarily and then leave. Eleanor had found a strong friendship in Hermione, and while it wasn't as strong, she also enjoyed a friendship with Ron and Harry. She found the two of them to be funny and kind, and remarkably good friends.

"Do you have your present for Draco wrapped?" Olga asked her daughter. Eleanor fought the urge to roll her eyes at the mention of Draco and nodded.

"It's under the tree." Eleanor responded, hoping something would happen so that she wouldn't have to spend the whole night talking to her old friend.

"Why don't you go grab all the gifts we got for the Malfoys and come set them on the table." Darius suggested, giving Eleanor a light shove in the direction of the sitting room, where the tree was kept. Eleanor walked over and picked up the three packages that lay under the pine needles and began dragging her feet towards the dining room. She didn't know what she would say to Draco, it had been months since they had spoken like friends. She missed him, she really did, but she didn't know how to be friends with him again.

There was a cacophony from their fireplace in the foyer and Olga, Darius and Eleanor walked to greet their guests.

"Eleanor, how long has it been?" Narcissa smiled widely, gathering Eleanor in a hug immediately. "Oh, you've grown so. Hogwarts is treating you well."

"Despite the fact that this little traitor is a Gryffindor." Lucius butt in, putting his hand on Eleanor's shoulder. His voice was light hearted, and he was trying to be affectionate, but there was still a slight sneer behind his words. "I suppose we always knew you were a lioness."

"Draco, dear, you look absolutely dashing." Olga smiled, hugging Draco, who was turning slightly pink.

"Learning a lot at our old alma mater Draco?" Darius asked, shaking his hand firmly.

"I like to think so, sir." He replied, avoiding looking at Eleanor.

"What's your best subject?"

"Potions, probably." Draco answered.

"What about you, Eleanor?" Narcissa asked.

"Definitely not potions." Eleanor laughed a little. "I'd say Herbology is my best class right now."

"Perhaps Draco could help you out a bit with Potions then." Lucius suggested. "It wouldn't do any harm."

Draco looked mortified at his father's words. Of course, the parents had no idea that Draco and Eleanor had stopped speaking.

"Perhaps." Eleanor smiled with a nod, looking at Draco for a moment and then looking away.

The six of them all sat around the table over full plates and talked about their lives and the season.

"It is so strange having them gone, isn't it?" Olga mentioned, looking at the two 11 year olds with love. "I mean, we used to spend everyday with them and now they are just gone."

"I took to sending Draco a letter everyday, just filled with things I would have said to him to him had he been at home." Narcissa laughed. Draco turned pink again.

"Actually, mum, maybe you shouldn't send me a letter every day." Draco mumbled into his food.

"It's always good to have them back though." Olga smiled, trying to keep the conversation moving so her dear friends didn't have time to dwell in the ungratefulness of their well loved son.

"Tell me about your school chums, Draco." Darius invited.

"I spend a lot of my time with Crabbe and Goyle, sometimes Nott as well. We have all of our classes together, and we share a dorm, so I'd say they are the people I spend the most time with. I usually help them with their homework, they can be pretty dumb." Draco laughed. Lucius chuckled too, Eleanor rolled her eyes a little bit as she took a sip of pumpkin juice.

"What about your friends, Eleanor?" Lucius asked, still smiling from Draco's joke.

"Well, they are no Crabbe and Goyle, that's for sure." Eleanor jabbed sarcastically, only Draco could detect the dig. "We all have a good time together, and we are a pretty good study group if I do say so myself." Eleanor didn't elaborate too much on all of the nonsense her and her friends had already gotten into so far that year.

"You're friends with one of those..._Weasleys_ aren't you?" Lucius asked with an upturned nose. Draco began chuckling quietly, and Eleanor ground her teeth.

"Yes, Ron. He's quite remarkable, actually. He knocked out a troll all on his own, did you hear?" Eleanor bragged about her friend, hoping to gain him some honor and respect at their table.

Lucius made a small annoyed sound, and Eleanor was filled with pride.

"Alright, I want Narcissa to open her gift." Olga clapped excitedly, noticing the tension and wanting desperately to release it. Narcissa smiled at her friend, and suggested moving to the sitting room, which they all did. Narcissa was stunned at the beautiful emerald scarf that her best friend had given her and Lucius joked that Olga was outdoing him in the gift department, all of them laughed because they knew that could never be true with the way Lucius spoiled his beloved wife. Narcissa gave Olga a pair of black, dragon leather gloves, which Olga promptly put on and refused to take off throughout the night because she loved them so. As a joke, Darius gave Lucius a variety of ribbons for his hair and everyone had a good laugh about it before giving him an ornate ring with the Malfoy family crest on it. Lucius was, of course, terrible at expressing his gratitude, but he was very grateful at the kind gift and nod to his heritage. Lucius then gave Darius an old, high quality bottle of Firewhiskey. The four adults then got very excited and retreated to the kitchen to get glasses and start pouring.

"You can open yours if you like." Eleanor said, handing poorly wrapped package to Draco. "Sorry about the wrapping, I'm not very good at it."

"It's alright." Draco shrugged and smiled as he took the package from Eleanor's hand. He unwrapped it quickly and got excited when he saw the box that showed the gift inside.

"It's a training snitch." Eleanor said. "It is supposed to be faster than all the other ones, and it has a bunch of different settings to help you train. There is a book in the box that tells you a bunch of different drills to run to build up different seeker skills. I know you wanted to go out for Quidditch next year and thought this would help you train up." She explained, turning a bit pink, worried Draco's lack of words meant he didn't like it.

"I love it!" Draco said excitedly, wrapping an arm around his friend in a half hug, forgetting for a moment that they weren't supposed to be friends. "Thank you, El, thank you so much." He spent a few more moments flipping through the book and examining the snitch. "I got you something too!" He seemed to suddenly remember, handing Eleanor a nicely wrapped package.

She opened it quietly, careful not to rip the wrappings. It was a small box, and when she opened it, she saw a gold necklace that just had the letter E as a pendant. It was simple, but Eleanor loved it.

"My mother suggested getting silver, but I thought gold would go better with your Gryffindor robes." Draco said shyly. Eleanor's heart swelled, that sentiment was better than the actual gift. "I still want to be friends with you, El. My friends now aren't as funny as you, and they are so dull. Could we please be friends again?"

"Of course, Draco. But you need to accept that I am also friends with Harry, Hermione and Ron." Eleanor pointed out.

"I don't have to be friends with them, do I?" Draco asked warily.

"No, but you can't be mean to them either." Eleanor warned, and Draco shrugged a bit, but hugged his friend anyway.

* * *

Second year was incredibly hard for Eleanor. Draco had called Hermione, her best friend, a mudblood to her face, and she was furious with him for a long time, but she also didn't support her friends thinking he was the heir of Slytherin and decided to remove herself from that whole debacle completely, refusing to have any part in it. At the end of the year, when Harry told them he thought that Lucius was the one who gave Ginny the diary that nearly destroyed her, she didn't want to believe his words, and she didn't. In her mind, there was no way that Lucius, the man that had grown up caring and being friendly towards her and her family, could have committed such a horrible act with another young girl.

Eleanor was determined during third year to not let Harry and Draco's feud make her friendship with either of them harder. Her excitement for the year grew when she found that her Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was exceptionally good and was neither incompetent, nor You-Know-Who, which had been a problem in the past.

When she first met Professor Lupin in the compartment on the Hogwarts Express, it was a strange encounter. He had been sleeping until he sent the dementor away from Harry.

"Eleanor Cordarri you said your name was?" He asked again, looking rather pale after Eleanor introduced herself. She nodded with a smile, and his smile seemed to falter a bit, and he began looking around nervously.

"Do you know my parents or something?" Eleanor asked, wondering why he needed that confirmation.

He cracked a small smile and chuckled a bit. "Sort of." He shrugged, then made a mad dash out of the compartment.

"Strange." Eleanor mused quietly, but returned to her reading without a second thought. At first, in class he seemed to avoid her raised hands and her remarkable execution of spells. She was frustrated when he stopped the lesson after Harry's boggart turned into a dementor, she wanted to show him how well she would be able to do the spell, and since she was behind Harry in line, she never got the chance. But as the year progressed, she asserted herself more in class and made it nearly impossible for Professor Lupin to continue to overlook her. One day, before Christmas Break, Snape gave Eleanor detention for blowing up a potion and making her station a mess, but he conveniently couldn't oversee it and left her with Lupin.

"He put you in detention for making a mistake in class?" Professor Lupin asked as she sat in his classroom, prepared to write lines. "Did you clean it up?"

"Immediately." Eleanor nodded. "And apologized profusely, but it was too late." She shrugged and laughed a little. "It's alright, though. At least I don't have to sit with him to write lines." Eleanor picked up her quill and began her lines.

"Wait, wait. I won't make you do that. Mistakes are a natural occurrence, and are a part of learning. I don't think you deserve to be punished. I'll tell him I had you alphabetize my books." Lupin laughed as he tapped the bookshelf with his wand and the books rearranged themselves. Eleanor smiled gratefully at him. "So tell me about yourself, Eleanor." Lupin poured two cups of tea and the two of them sat at a desk.

"Not a lot to me, to be frank." Eleanor shrugged. "You already know the important stuff, that I'm in Gryffindor, and rubbish at potions." Lupin cracked a smile. He didn't want to show Eleanor the effect she had on him, or that his heart was hammering wildly. He's tried to get out of the job the first night, but couldn't explain to Dumbledore why he had changed his mind, and was so coerced into staying. He tried to push her away, to leave her in the back of the class, but she was determined to show off her skills, and she had them, and Lupin couldn't ignore her, and so he began getting to know his daughter, and accidentally becoming enamored with fatherly love and everyday regretting giving her up.

"Very skilled in Defense Against the Dark Arts though." Remus noted, Eleanor smiled and shrugged modestly. "I would also guess very good at Charms?"

Eleanor shook her head a bit. "I'm alright, not great. I'd say my best subject is probably Herbolody, Professor Sprout says it probably has something to do with my 'gentle spirit' or some rubbish," Eleanor rolled her eyes in good humor and turned a bit pink.

Remus wanted to give her more compliments, he wanted to get to know her. He wanted to ask her about her home life, about her parents, he wanted to know if she was happy, but he knew she wouldn't confide in him. So they made small talk, and when she left his office, Remus locked himself inside and let himself weep.

* * *

The first day back after winter break, Olga and Darius Cordarri angrily stormed to Dumbledore's office and demanded to speak to Remus Lupin. It was a sight to see Olga and Darius angry, many people never had. Dumbledore granted the three of them privacy but asked that everyone remain civil.

"What exactly do you think you're doing?" Darius demanded furiously.

"I promise you, I don't understand." Remus began desperately.

"You don't understand?" Olga repeated. "Explain why our daughter comes home from Christmas break and tells us all about her new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, who also pulls her aside for tea, and lets her off without detentions."

"We had a contract," Darius reminded, "or did you forget?"

"As soon as I realized she was here, as soon as I realized she would be in my class I tried to quit, I tried to get out of the job." Remus swore. "I'm not trying to get close to her, she is just a student."

"But she isn't just a student, she's your daughter, as much as we've tried to forget. You aren't allowed to make contact with her, and you know it." Olga growled.

"I'm not going to be here next year." Remus promised. "I'm leaving and you'll never see me again."

Darius and Olga shared a look and both glared menacingly at Lupin before leaving.

"You see to it he is gone next year, Dumbledore, or there will be hell to pay." Olga spat angrily.

* * *

Despite the fact that she found out he was a werewolf who was friends with Sirius Black, Eleanor was extremely sad to see Lupin go. Harry, and Hermione explained how they had saved Sirius to Ron and Eleanor (both of whom remained in the infirmary due to minor injuries sustained that night). Eleanor said her goodbyes to Lupin at the end of the year, who seemed especially sad to be leaving, and went home for the summer.

The Weasleys invited Eleanor to join them at the Quidditch World Cup only days after she had accepted the Malfoys invitation. She did promise to meet up with them while they were there.

Olga and Darius had decided to stay home from the craziness and trusted Lucius and Narcissa to take care of their daughter. While at the Cup, Eleanor was excitedly on the lookout for her friends that she hadn't seen since the end of their third year.

"How far up are we?" She heard a familiar voice call. Eleanor spun around and saw a large group of red haired people, plus Hermione and Harry.

"Well put it this way, if it rains, you'll be the first to know." Lucius drawled. Eleanor furrowed her brows in annoyance at the snideness of his comment, but quickly lifted her features and ran up to greet her friends.

"Getting a good workout then?" She joked as she hugged all of them. "You'll be able to see everything!" She gushed.

"Your boyfriend doesn't seem to think so." Ron huffed, looking at Draco, who was growing more annoyed with Eleanor holding them up by the second.

"Ron, you know I don't like that joke." Eleanor sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Will you come to our tent after the match?" Ginny asked excitedly. Eleanor and Ginny became good friends the past year, and Eleanor was excited to see the youngest Weasley.

"Yeah, of course!" Eleanor said, and glanced back at the Malfoys, who were getting impatient. "I should probably go! Enjoy the match!"

"We're sitting in the minister's box. We were invited by Cornelius Fudge himself." Draco bragged as they began walking away. Eleanor rolled her eyes as Lucius jabbed the end of his cane into Draco's chest.

The match was exciting, and the Malfoys were a lot more fun to be around when they weren't taunting the Weasleys. Eleanor often felt guilty on behalf of the Malfoys' behaviour.

"I'm gonna go find the Weasleys, if that's alright." Eleanor announced to the Malfoy family after the match.

"Narcissa and Draco were going to head home, I suggest you go with them." Lucius warned heavily. "It will probably get pretty rowdy here tonight."

"I think I'll be fine." Eleanor assured.

"Eleanor, I really need you to go with Draco and Narcissa. I promised your parents." Lucius insisted, eyeing her carefully. Afraid to cause a conflict, Eleanor simply agreed and grabbed Narcissa's arm, causing her to Disapparate with Narcissa.

* * *

"How's Potter holding up?" Draco chuckled to Eleanor one evening as they sat and studied together in the library. It wasn't really studying as much as it was Draco bragging about already finishing his studying and trying to avoid his dorm mates. Draco sat on the table, looking down at Eleanor's open books.

"He'd be doing a lot better if you hadn't made those 'Potter Stinks' buttons." Eleanor sighed. It was exceptionally hard, and getting harder, for Eleanor to be friends with both Draco and Ron, Harry and Hermione. She didn't want to participate in trash talk of either party, and refused to side with either in a feud. It was extremely difficult to just remain neutral throughout it all.

"I made those all myself, they are pretty brilliant, huh?" Draco laughed proudly.

"No, not really. They are pretty rude." Eleanor huffed, trying to focus on her research and essay-writing.

"So sensitive," Draco tsked and laughed a bit, "can't take a joke anymore?" Draco snatched her book up and held it above his head so that she couldn't reach it. Eleanor sighed

"I can take a joke, just not you disrespecting my friends. Give that back, I have homework to do." Eleanor groaned a bit, growing tired of Draco's antics. He'd been hanging around her all day due to some conflict with his friends that he wasn't keen on elaborating on, and had taken to annoying Eleanor just to get a rise out of her.

"Come take it, then." Draco challenged. "If you can." He taunted as Eleanor attempted to reach for it. She stood on her toes, but due to the shortness and stoutness of her arms and legs, she could not reach the book at the end of Draco's long arm.

"And you wonder why I never study with you." Eleanor crossed her arms impatiently.

"Why do you even study, you're smart." Draco pointed out, handing her book back, seeming blue that she didn't enjoy his little game.

"I'm smart because I study, not in spite of it." Eleanor chuckled. "That's how it works for most people. Not everyone is a nearly certified genius." She rolled her eyes.

"A genius?" Draco repeated with a laugh, but he showed no intention of renouncing the label. Draco loved all compliments, but the ones on his brain were definitely his favorite. Once Eleanor returned to her studying Draco decided to gain her attention once more, not liking the fact that he was being ignored. "Anyone asked you to the Yule Ball yet?" Draco asked, he thought he sounded smooth, but his voice trembled a bit. Eleanor couldn't tell the difference.

"No, actually." Eleanor shrugged. "It's so funny, Harry is in such a panic about who to ask, and he hasn't thought once to ask me." She chuckled a little.

"Do you want him to ask you?" Draco asked sharply, a quick pang of jealousy flashed through him, and this surprised him, but he suppressed it.

"Not particularly, but I would go with him as his friend, and there would be no reason for him to stress about it." Eleanor mused a little. "You're taking Pansy Parkinson, right?"

Draco scoffed a little and ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "I was, but then a Durmstrang boy asked her, and she told me a better option came along."

Eleanor's mouth dropped open. "What?" She asked. "She can't do that, that is so rude." Eleanor began chuckling a bit now.

"Yeah, ha ha, laugh all you want." Draco sneered. "It's embarrassing," He confided quietly, "but it's fine, I'll find another date."

"Well, I'd go with you." Eleanor offered casually. "I mean, only if you aren't too proud to take a Gryffindor." She mocked slightly, eyeing her friend playfully.

"I was actually thinking about asking you." Draco told her with a small, uncomfortable laugh. He was glad that she was the one who brought it up, smooth as he was, he would not have been that casual.

"Then it's settled, we'll go to the Yule Ball together." Eleanor nodded in confirmation, elated that she had a date and ecstatic it was her friend.

* * *

"You look lovely." Hermione sang happily in the Gryffindor common room. She was elated in spirit of the Yule Ball as she admired Eleanor's dark navy dress.

"I'm sure Malfoy'll love that." Ron grumbled, shifting uncomfortably in his archaic dress robes. Eleanor rolled her pale eyes at the jab that flew her way.

"Ron, stop acting like a git because Hermione and I both got dates and you are stuck going with the only girl who was left." Eleanor chuckled, her voice ringing like a bell as her and Hermione spun around each other and adjusting each other's dresses with joy and anticipation. Fred and George had slipped the pair a few drinks to calm nerves and "enliven the party" but had cleverly kept it from Ron, who would only sulk further.

"At least I am not going with a Slytherin." Padma Patil sniffed from the stairs, looking down at Eleanor condescendingly. Eleanor's heart dropped to her feet as she felt immediate regret for her mean comment about the Patil girl.

"P-padma." Eleanor stuttered out, looking at both of the Patil twins standing identically with crossed arms and cross expressions. "You both look lovely." Eleanor breathed out.

"Shove it." Padma hissed.

"Bitch." Pavarti whispered as she stalked past her and hooked herself onto Harry's arm. Hermione and Eleanor shared annoyed looks. The Patil twins started pulling Harry and Ron towards the portrait hall.

"A-aren't you both coming?" Ron asked, stopping Padma in her tracks, causing her to let out an annoyed huff.

"My date is going to walk up and get me." Hermione smirked lightly, looking at the floor. Eleanor nudged her playfully, aware that her best friend was going to the Yule Ball with the one and only Viktor Krum.

"And I'm meeting Draco by the entrance of the Great Hall." Eleanor nodded. "I thought I'd wait up here with Hermione for a while."

"Draco isn't even man enough to walk up to the Gryffindor Tower and walk with you down to the Great Hall?" Ron snorted. The Patil twins both cackled along with him.

"I asked him not come up." Eleanor admitted, warning him with her eyes to not continue making fun of Draco. But Ron was confident with the laughter of the Patil twins behind him.

"Can't break a sweat, can he?" Ron continued, Pavarti and Padma continued to giggle madly. Harry caught Eleanor's eyes behind Ron's head, warning her to keep her defensiveness in check. But Eleanor had warned Ron, and now was not holding anything back.

"Actually, I told him not to come up for your sake, Ronald." Eleanor crossed her arms, her eyes alight with mischief. "Yeah, see, I knew your dress robes were going to be simply hideous and I just didn't want Draco to say anything that might cause you embarrassment in front of your … beloved date."

Ron turned red and turned away quickly and stalked out of the portrait hole as Hermione hid her laughs behind her hand. Once the portrait closed Eleanor began laughing as well. "Merlin, he doesn't know when to quit."

"No." Hermione shook her head, her smile held the ghost of her past laughter. "Is that really why Draco isn't walking up here, though?"

Eleanor's eyes dropped to the floor. "No, he didn't want to walk up here, but it's for the best, really."

"Did you want him to walk up here?" Hermione asked, putting a hand on her friend's arm. Eleanor was about to answer when a fifth year poked their head into the portrait hole.

"Hermione, you've got a special someone waiting out here for you."

Hermione blushed deeply and nodded. "Walk down with Viktor and I." Hermione pleaded.

"No, no. This is your date. Becoming the third wheel is something I can't imagine I would like." Eleanor laughed, shooing her friend off.

"I insist. Truly." Hermione grabbed Eleanor's hand and yanked her towards the portrait hole. The two girls exited and saw the handsome Viktor Krum waiting for Hermione. Eleanor stayed a few feet back to give her friend some space.

"I feel truly lucky to be able to escort two lovely ladies instead of just one." Krum complemented in a heavy accent, holding out his empty arm for Eleanor. She hesitated for a moment, this was her friend's day, but Hermione nodded and so Eleanor wrapped her arm around Krum's. The trio made their way down to the Great Hall. Eleanor broke away from Hermione and Viktor once she saw Draco. She had hoped he would at least look happy to see her, but he did not. Eleanor frowned a bit at Draco's unhappy expression. Did he not think she looked nice?

"Really nice, Eleanor." Draco snapped as he put her arm in his. Eleanor jumped at the way he said her name. He usually called her 'El' or 'Ellie' if he was especially pleased with her. She didn't like hearing her full name come out of his mouth.

"Draco," Eleanor started, her voice saturated with confusion and hurt. She tried to meet his eyes but he wouldn't look at her.

"It's embarrassing enough I have to take a Gryffindor to this bloody ball, but then you walk in on the arm of Viktor Krum. Did you even think about how that would make me look." He seethed through his teeth. Eleanor snapped her arm out of his and stopped in the middle of the crowded entry way.

"Would it have been more embarrassing to come to this alone?" Eleanor half yelled, causing the people surrounding them to stare, which Draco did not like. "Let us not forget that that would have been your fate had it not been for me, Draco Malfoy."

Draco panicked for a moment as people started to stop and take in the spectacle. He quickly and gently gathered Eleanor's arm in his again. "I'm sorry." He whispered to her as he forced her to keep walking. "You're right."

"As always." Eleanor huffed, looking away from him.

"You really do have a short temper." Draco laughed a bit as they continued into the Great Hall.

"I do not." Eleanor spat angrily. "I just don't have patience for gits."

"Is that not the same thing?" Draco mused jokingly. He was trying to be funny now and get back on Eleanor's good side. Eleanor was perturbed because she knew it would work within moments.

"Shove it, Malfoy." She hissed as she looked among the crowd to see Harry and Hermione had begun to dance to the opening song. "Oh, they look lovely." She smiled at her friends. Draco scoffed a little at her comment. "Draco Malfoy, I swear to Merlin." Eleanor threatened, as she turned to look at him angrily. When she did all she saw was him smiling charmingly as he snaked a hand around her waist and moved her onto the dance floor.

"Thought we could dance." He smirked.

"Yes, well, thank you for asking." Eleanor sighed, but was surprised at how good he was at dancing.

"Remember when we were kids and our parents would host balls. We were supposed to stay upstairs with the nannies but you somehow always managed to sit at the top of the stairs and watch all of the couples dance." Draco laughed.

"You would do the same thing." Eleanor defended, not wanting him to make fun of her for her old antics.

"Only because I wanted to spend time with you." Draco rolled his eyes. "And I would have never been this good of a dancer had I not done that, so in the end, you benefited from it anyway."

Eleanor rolled her eyes. "Don't be too dapper now, Draco. What would your friends say if they saw you smiling as you danced with a Gryffindor."

"At least I have a date. And a pretty one at that. If you hadn't saved my ass, I would be in the dungeons right now with Crabbe and Goyle." Draco whispered low so that no one would hear the breezes of him being grateful to Eleanor.

"How unfortunate that would have been." Eleanor chuckled a bit under her breath. "But then Crabbe and Goyle would have had a pretty date, so it would have all worked out."

Draco stepped on her foot on purpose and smirked at her as he regained his composure. "I do miss your little jests, Ellie." He chuckled. "You always think you are the smartest in the room." He looked over her head and didn't make eye contact with her though he could feel her blue eyes staring at him.

"Well, I usually am." Eleanor then stepped on his foot to snap his gaze back to her.

Draco looked down at her and looked amused. "Except for any times that I am in the same room."

"Oh please." Eleanor snorted. "You don't honestly believe that Draco. Because if you do than you are dimmer than I think."

"You think I'm dim?" Draco laughed in disbelief.

"The dimmest." Eleanor chuckled affectionately. Of course, she didn't actually believe this, and Draco knew that too.

"Well, when you are in the room, that is absolutely true." Draco finally conceded with a compliment.

* * *

Olga and Darius were sitting in their front parlor reading one evening. The next day they were to pick up Eleanor from Hogwarts for Christmas Holiday. They were not expecting visitors that night, so when their Floo flamed green, Olga and Darius were understandably startled.

"Lucius." Olga breathed out, her heart clutching her chest as she looked at her stoic friend standing in her parlor. Though Lucius was normally a stone-faced, unenthusiastic man, he seemed even more emotionless than normal. "You gave me a fright."

Darius reached his hand out to shake his friend's. Lucius' fingers twitched on the serpent head of his cane, but did not clasp around Darius' outstretched greeting. "All is well I hope." Darius stated, but it sounded like an inquiry.

"I am afraid that all is not well. That is why I am here." Lucius finally spoke. "You both were there for Narcissa and I when we needed it most. I must warn you both, the Dark Lord is planning his return. This time around he won't be as lenient with people remaining neutral."

Olga and Darius both stared at their friend in disbelief. "Y-you don't mean to tell us you are involved with that again, do you Lucius?" Olga's mouth felt dry and chalky as she tried to comprehend the Malfoy family in the same awful position as they had been the last time the Dark Lord rose to power.

Lucius' jaw clenched and he looked away from her face. He was a proud man and did not regret easily, but he could not bear the shame of looking Olga and Darius in the face as he told them that he had not become a better man like they had hoped. "I don't have a choice, Olga." He finally spit out. He tried to ignore the irritated, itching feeling on his arm. Of course, he wanted nothing more than to rip the bloody thing off. He knew Narcissa and Draco were safer when he was not involved with the Dark Lord, but he also knew that there was no other way. He couldn't get out of it. Not with that skull and snake dancing on his forearm.

"There is always another way." Olga pleaded, her eyes filling with tears. She grabbed Lucius' collar, trying to drag him to sense.

"If He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is really back on the rise, surely the Order of the Phoenix knows about it. We can ask for your protection." Darius began to reason, laying a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder.

For a moment, a tiny sliver of time, Lucius' eyes glimmered as though he would consider it. It was a fleeting moment, but Olga and Darius saw it. Then Lucius shoved his friends off of him.

"You insult me." He snarled. "I did not come here to ask for you help. I came to help you both and your daughter." He regained his composition and looked down on his friends. He wouldn't admit that he was angry with himself for causing the looks of shock and hurt that fell over the faces of Olga and Darius. "If you do not join his side, you shall be persecuted. Anyone who is not with him is against him. Your daughter is in an especially bad position, what with her being a Gryffindor, a friend of Harry Potter, and an adopted Half Blood, no less." Olga and Darius both looked shocked. Darius opened his mouth to speak and Olga began to cry. "Yes, I know. I've known for a while. It isn't hard to figure out. The Dark Lord knows as well, and he is willing to spare her if your family sides with him."

"What?" Olga asked in a watery gasp.

"Your daughter is of special interest to him. She is intelligent and charming and personable. Her proximity to Harry Potter is what interests him most. He does not want to kill her, despite her being a Half-Blood and of werewolf spawn." Lucius wanted to spit those words to uphold the illusion that he was cold and unfeeling, but he felt himself breaking. He didn't want to subject Draco to the life he had chosen, he knew it would break him. He knew it would break Eleanor too. She was too kind for his world, but it was the only way she and her parents would live. And Lucius loved all of the Cordarris as much as his own family.

"You know we do not believe in his cause." Darius held his ground as Olga paced and wept. She clutched her heart for support.

"He will kill you." Lucius shouted. "He will kill her." He added, knowing very well that Olga and Darius valued Eleanor's life above their own.

"Maybe we should listen to him." Olga finally let out, surprising both her husband and Lucius.

"Pardon?" Darius asked, furrowing his brows. He couldn't comprehend his proud and kind wife who always stood up for what was right choosing to side with the Dark Lord.

"I don't want to. I hate the man, if he is even a man anymore. But Eleanor, she cannot die. Darius, I would do anything to protect her."

"As would I, but you must see that siding with him will only put her at greater risk." Darius reasoned. He then turned to his long time friend with stone cold eyes. This was a look that Lucius had never seen on his usually loving and nurturing friend. "Lucius, you know that joining You-Know-Who will only bring about pain for our daughter. We will do everything in our power to protect her from that evil fiend."

"I'm only trying to spare your family." Lucius told them, desperate for them to reconsider. He couldn't imagine a world without the Cordarris in it. He didn't want to think about their castle being empty. He and Narcissa and Draco needed their friends, they had no one else.

"You would be sparing us nothing." Darius hissed. "If you will not seek refuge with us, then we will do it alone."

The proud, stoic, cold, emotionless Lucius crumpled. They would not come. They would not join him. They were sentencing themselves to death. "I can not stray. You must protect yourselves. Let me protect you."

"He is not protection, Lucius. Can you not see? He is the enemy." Darius wanted to offer his friend safety. He wanted them to be in everything together. Friendship and love was the hero of the first war, and it would prevail again. Lucius could not see that. He straightened up and regained his cold self. His face ice, his heart retreating back into the cold and black. He knew their fate. He tried. He would be there if they decided to come over to the side of the Dark Lord, but he had a greater obligation to his wife and his son. He had to protect them the best way he knew how. He had to keep them safe first.

"You've made your decision then?" Lucius asked.

"We have." Darius nodded firmly, holding a panicked Olga by the waist.

"Then I am afraid I cannot protect your family any longer."


	2. Chapter 2

Eleanor's mind was fuzzy. She was vaguely aware of Professor McGonagall's arms clutching her shaking body close to her chest. She heard murmurs of comfort, she heard Professor Dumbledore tell Professor Snape to get Hermione, Harry and Ron to help comfort their friend. She was thankful that Snape reminded Dumbledore that Harry might not be of the most comfort, considering he had just recently seen the return of You-Know-Who and the death of a friend only a few days earlier. Eleanor's throat ached from screaming, snot and tears covered her face, her heart felt as though it was ripped out of her. The Professors that surrounded her didn't know what to do. She had been inconsolable for nearly an hour. Their ears and hearts all hurt at the sounds her broken screams. She was not getting tired, she was not stopping. She was grieving. She was grieving loudly, deeply, widely.

Her parents, her best friends, her favorite people were gone. They were dead. Everyone around her knew that she wouldn't take the news well. She was such a tender hearted girl who loved her parents more than herself. She hadn't spoken a word, not coherently anyway. Never had she ever felt so much pain in her life. Her heart felt like it was actually broken inside of her.

"Severus, make haste, get Miss Granger." Professor McGonagall called, clutching Eleanor tightly to her and she screamed and shook. She would occasionally cough or gag on her own tears. Grief was not pretty. Grief was black and grotesque and the most inhumane human experience that existed. How could this pain even be real? Eleanor was exhausted and yet so far from being out of tears.

"No." Eleanor choked out, causing Snape, Dumbledore and McGonagall to all look at her strangely. It was her first clear word since they told her. "Draco." She spat out. Snape nodded once and spun on his heel and left Dumbledore's office.

"Severus, Madam Pomfrey too." McGonagall added before Snape had officially left.

Unfortunately, both Dumbledore and McGonagall had had to be the bearers of bad news and tell their students that a parent or both had died several times in the past. None of them took it well. No one said thank you, no one left happy. Many cried, many asked questions, many went blank and numb. However, none of them had ever reacted in this way. They could not get her to calm down, and McGonagall was becoming afraid by Eleanor's staggered breathing and consistent gagging. She needed to sleep, she needed to stop crying, to stop screaming. She was thrashing against McGonagall, and the Professor was afraid of what the young girl would do had she not been held by the her Head of House.

It felt like years until Draco rushed into Dumbledore's office. He immediately scrambled to his knees and took the sobbing Eleanor from McGonagall's tired arms.

"What did you do to her?" Draco seethed. He couldn't imagine what kind of pain they must have inflicted on her to illicit this response. Eleanor had always been strong. She could withstand nearly anything. He always saw her as unbreakable. Snape thumped him hard on the back of his head as Madam Pomfrey poured a brew into a cup.

"Her parents have passed, Mr. Malfoy." Dumbledore said solemnly. Draco felt his heart drop. He, of course, did not love Eleanor's parents as much as she did, but he did love them. He felt his heart hurt. He knew he would cry at some point too, but it would be when he was alone. He would cry for himself, for the mentors he had lost. He would cry for his parents, who both lost their best friends, their only true friends. He would cry for Eleanor, who just lost everything. But now, he would be strong for his best friend. He would be sure that Eleanor knew she wasn't alone. He would take care of her. He owed her that.

Draco could only manage a nod as he held his screaming friend tighter. She was completely and utterly broken. Her screams were the only reminder of the fierce girl she was. Even holding her, she felt hollow. He was terrified that her life was derived from her parents. He wondered who she would be without them behind her.

Madame Pomfrey bustled over to Eleanor, she was noticeably more calm in Draco's arms. He reminded her of home, she did not fight so hard against him.

"Hold her hair back, dear." Madame Pomfrey said lightly to Draco.

"What is that?" He questioned, looking at the goblet.

"Something to calm her down." The nurse answered shortly.

"Why? Her parents died, is she not allowed to cry?" Draco wasn't sure why he was fighting, but he wanted to keep her safe, he wanted to take care of her. He felt very protective to her, he felt obligated to her, he felt responsible for her.

"She has been like this for over an hour Mr. Malfoy. She is making herself sick." Professor McGonagall was understandably frazzled and frustrated, and ready for Eleanor to be calm so that she could get some sleep, some water, some food. Right as McGonagall said this, Eleanor began dry heaving on Draco's arm. She was choking on her own tears. Draco's first instinct was to push her off of him. He couldn't look at her without feeling a bit sick himself. He held her away from his chest as she coughed up nothing, gagging on what could only be the breath she was taking in.

"Her hair, son." Madame Pomfrey reminded harshly. Draco's hands panicked a bit as he scrambled to gather her thick, brown locks into his hand. Her body wracked with sobs, but Draco was able to prop her chin up so that Madame Pomfrey could get the brew in. Almost instantly, Eleanor quieted. Her eyes were closed, and swollen. Her entire face was wet with tears, and her breathing was still uneven as her body calmed down. Madame Pomfrey looked gratefully at Draco for maneuvering her and making it easier to administer the potion.

Draco was rigid as Eleanor slowly began to regain her natural breathing. Madame Pomfrey grabbed a damp cloth and cleaned Eleanor's face with it gently.

"Thank you, Mr. Malfoy." Professor McGonagall sighed when Eleanor seemed to have drifted to sleep. Her head still rested on Draco's shoulder and her body shuddered every once and awhile with tremoring aftershocks of the trauma past.

"What did you give to her?" Draco asked quietly.

"A diluted sleeping potion. It is split with a bit of numbing potion. She will sleep for awhile, and when she wakes up, her heart will not hurt so much. She will feel emotionally numb for a few days." The nurse answered. "Not ideal, of course. It delays the grief process, but it was the only thing I could think to do."

"Thank you, Poppy." Professor Dumbledore said quietly. "It will give us a few days to help her sort out her affairs and get her to where she needs to go."

"So you're just going to dump her somewhere, leave her for dead when the pain comes back?" Draco seethed.

"Come now, Draco. You wouldn't think so little of us." Snape drawled out.

"Like hell I would." Draco's head snapped to his Head of House. "She's my best friend. I won't have any of you tossers put her in a worse position than she is already in." Any other time, Draco would have gotten house points taken away from speaking like that to professors. However, given the circumstances, it was forgiven. "Send an owl to my parents. They knew her parents best. Surely, they can do something." Draco suggested.

"They have been notified. Unfortunately, they can't seem to get into Eleanor's home through Floo or Apparation. They even tried simply walking up, and they could not step on the premises. We've contacted the Ministry about this strange phenomenon, we expect an answer by morning." Professor Dumbledore informed. "We would never simply leave Miss Cordarri on the streets."

Draco scoffed a bit. "You've done it before." He murmured lowly, grateful no one could hear him make a comment that could even be remotely taken in defense of Harry Potter. Eleanor must have been rubbing off on him.

"I believe we should have her stay the night in the infirmary." Madame Pomfrey spoke up. "We cannot solve anything more tonight."

Draco offered to carry her to the infirmary. About halfway there, his arms got very tired and his insisted on taking a break. Snape simply scoffed at him and carried Eleanor the rest of the way. She did not stir once. Professor McGonagall woke Harry, Ron and Hermione early the next morning so that they could be there when Eleanor awoke. Hermione shed a tear or two, imagining the hurt her friend must be feeling.

All three of them were shocked to see Draco half asleep in a chair next to the bed that Eleanor was peacefully sleeping in.

"Malfoy." Ron said shortly. "What are you doing here?"

Draco was wide awake in a second, looking like he was going to punch Ron square in the nose. "She asked for me. She didn't ask for any of you lot. She needed me."

The three were stunned and quiet. They all exchanged looks, unsure of what to say. They always knew Eleanor to be a fierce defender of Draco, but never imagined Draco holding that same love for Eleanor. He was always so cold. Even when they were friends, it always seemed very one-sided.

"She looks exhausted." Hermione finally said quietly. She brought a maroon knit blanket out of her bag. "I took it from her bed. I thought it might bring a bit of comfort." Draco slowly slipped out of the defensive as Hermione draped the blanket over her friend.

"Madame Pomfrey gave her a sedative last night." Draco rubbed his eyes, trying to wake himself up a bit more. He didn't like appearing vulnerable in front of Eleanor's Gryffindor friends. Or any Gryffindors. Or anyone. "She'll be out of it for a few days."

"Like sleeping?" Ron asked, placing her 'E' jumper that his mum had made her a few Christmases ago at the foot of her bed.

"No, not like sleeping." Draco snapped at the red head. "They didn't put her down, Weasley."

"Listen Malfoy-" Ron raised an angry finger at Draco, who looked more ready to fight than ever before.

"Stop it, both of you." Hermione hissed quickly as she saw Eleanor begin to stir.

"You woke her up, you dumb prick." Draco threw the jumper that Ron had brought back at Ron's face. Ron's fist was clenched in retaliation.

"He didn't wake me up." Eleanor croaked monotonously. Hermione was by her side in a moment, wrapping her friend in her arms. Ron and Harry pushed past Draco to crowd Eleanor, and lend her hugs. Draco stood at the foot of her bed, feeling out of place. He was not an emotional person, and he was bad at comforting people. Maybe he was what Eleanor needed last night when she was inconsolable, but now she needed love and that was something he felt he could not offer. He turned to go.

"Draco." Eleanor's hoarse voice stopped him in his tracks. "Stay." Draco pursed his lips and nodded. He stood at the end of her bed, his hands in his pockets, not looking at the four of them.

"How are you feeling?" Hermione asked sweetly.

"I'm not really." Eleanor answered emptily. "Is that normal? I don't feel anything."

"That'll be the sedative." Draco spoke. "Madame Pomfrey gave you some last night. To make you sleep, and to delay some of the sadness."

Eleanor looked at her intertwined hands. "I don't like that." She shook her head a little. "I want to be sad for them. They deserve for me to grieve over them. They were too good of people for me to not feel their loss." Eleanor looked as if she might cry, but she didn't. There truly was no sadness in her heart. There was nothing.

"Madame Pomfrey didn't want to give it to you, but she kind of had to." Draco shrugged. "You'll feel normal in a few days."

"Not normal." Eleanor shook her head.

"Well, you know what I mean." Draco looked away from her. A blood vessel had popped in her eye, so instead of white on either side of her blue iris, one side was blood red. It was hard for Draco to see her face, still swollen and red. He couldn't see her without thinking of the state he saw her in last night.

The door to the infirmary opened and Professor Dumbledore and a woman that Eleanor didn't recognize walked in.

"Good morning all." Professor Dumbledore smiled at the small crowd. "Miss Cordarri, how are we feeling today?"

"As expected, I suppose." Eleanor nodded once, eyeing the woman in professional robes closely.

"I am afraid I must ask to speak with Miss Cordarri alone." Professor Dumbledore sighed sadly, eyeing all four of Eleanor's most beloved friends.

"They can stay, can't they?" Eleanor begged. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled affectionately at the young girl.

"I am afraid this business must be dealt with in great secrecy. However, nothing is stopping them from waiting outside for you." Dumbledore nodded at her fellow classmates to leave the infirmary. Eleanor sat up, wanting to get whatever these matters were taken care of quickly.

"Miss Cordarri, I'm Regine Flagman, and I am with the Department of the Departed in the Ministry of Magic." She introduced. "May I just start by offering my deepest condolences. No child should ever have to go through this." Eleanor simply looked at her without saying anything. Regine pulled out a stack of papers from her robes. "I will be quick, but there will be a lot of information, so if you need a break, please let me know." Eleanor nodded once. "Alright, so to begin with, you parents left you everything. Unsurprising to you, I am sure. They set it up so that you do not have to be 17 to be in control of everything. The estate, the bank accounts, everything they owned, you now own." Eleanor nodded, she was unsurprised by this. "Interestingly enough, they put a clause in the will that says that if you marry, your funds and property rights are not to be shared with your spouse unless you go file paperwork making it so. I am not sure why they put that in there, perhaps they were afraid of you marrying the wrong person." Regine chuckled a bit at that.

"My parents didn't think that low of me." Eleanor snapped.

"Ah, yes, well, my apologies." Regine stuttered out, flipping to another page. "The Aurors also found that your parents protected their home. Only those who are blood related to you can get in without your permission, it seems. It must have been old magic, and very complicated. The Aurors tried to crack it, but could not. They did extensive experimenting, and determined it safe for you, but no one else. They will continue working on fixing that."

"Tell them to not do that." Eleanor said quickly. "Leave it as is." Regine and Dumbledore both looked at her strangely. Eleanor knew her parents, she suspected by putting those spells in place, they were protecting her somehow.

"A-are you sure? That will not fare well for you in an emergency situation. All of your blood relatives are dead." Regine struggled to understand.

"I know that." Eleanor snapped. "I don't want that changed. I will contact your morbid department if I ever want it changed."

Regine nodded once, shocked and a bit ashamed, then returned to her papers. "All that is needed is your signature on the will, and everything is yours."

Eleanor snatched the papers and scribbled her signature on the line, right under her mother's and father's. On a normal day, she would have teared up, but she felt empty. Like there was nothing there. Nothing in the world could make her sad. It was as if her feelings had gotten turned off. "Are we done here?" She asked.

"T-there is the logistics of the bodies." Regine let out uncomfortably. "They are currently at St. Mungos being autopsied." Regine looked at Eleanor expectantly. Eleanor felt nothing. She wanted to feel something.

"How did it happen?" Eleanor asked. "Where were they found?"

Regine looked shocked at Eleanor's lack of emotion. "The Department of Mysteries. Their cause of death is unknown."

"So my parents just both somehow died in the middle of the Ministry of Magic, in an obscure department. That's likely." Eleanor scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"That is why it is being investigated. There is no promise of when or if you will get their bodies back. However, your parents often duplicated their memories and kept them safe within the Department of Personal Histories, we would be happy to process those and send them your way. It may take awhile to check them out of the system, but we will be sure to get those to you."

"I would like that very much." Eleanor nodded once. "I don't suppose they left their last memories?" Eleanor asked hopefully.

"That sure would make things easier. As avid of memory duplicators as they were, they were unable to have their final memory processed." Regine laid a hand on Eleanor's leg. "We will find out what happened to your parents." She promised.

Eleanor fell silent and just stared at Regine's insincere hand that offered insincere comfort. "Are we done here?" Eleanor finally asked.

Regine nodded once, and Eleanor swung her legs over the side of the bed, wanting nothing more than to be around her friends. She was stunned by how weak she felt. Her legs wobbled under her, and her vision went a bit spotty.

"Perhaps some food and water would do you well." Dumbledore said, as he helped her sit back down. "I will see Miss Flagman out, and ask Madame Pomfrey to have a tray of food delivered."

Once Dumbledore left, Hermione, Ron and Harry filed back in. Hermione with a pair of comfortable leggings and woolly socks for her, and Ron with the jumper. Harry had brought her a chalice of water. Eleanor drank the water in one gulp. It's coolness soothed her aching throat as she pulled the curtain closed and changed into the clothes her friends had brought her.

"Thank you." She told them gratefully as she reopened her curtain to greet them. Madame Pomfrey was there now, with a full tray of food. Eleanor sat cross legged on the infirmary bed and began to devour the fruits and breads and cheeses in front of her. Part of her wanted to feel guilty for eating, but it felt like her negative emotions were shut away. So she ate, and felt grateful for her friends, and wished for her parents wistfully and not mournfully.

"Where did Draco go?" Eleanor finally asked, feeling his absence greatly. There was a reason she asked for him and not for Hermione. He reminded her most of home. He had always been there, her whole life. She wanted him to still be there.

"His parents are here. They are talking with Dumbledore about having you come home with them." Hermione answered helpfully.

"Don't go with them, Eleanor." Harry said in a panic. "Mr. Malfoy is a Death Eater, I saw him the other night, in the graveyard. You can't live with him, Eleanor, you can't."

"I won't, Harry." Eleanor laid a hand on her friend's arm. "And not because Lucius is a Death Eater, we've talked about this, he isn't. You were confused that night, it was dark, you were scared."

"He said his name, Eleanor." Harry mumbled, peeved that she refused to believe him.

"Harry, I know the Malfoys better than anyone. I know you don't like them, and I understand why, but they aren't Death Eaters." Eleanor was beginning to get annoyed with Harry now too. "Anyway, my parents left the entire estate and fortune to me. I'll just...go home." Eleanor sighed a bit. Her chest feeling hollow at the thought of returning to her home without her parents being there. Would it even be home anymore?

The doors to the infirmary burst open. Narcissa and Lucius looked exhausted. Narcissa's eyes were bloodshot and tired. Eleanor could tell she had been crying. Eleanor was certain that they could both tell how bad she had been the night before. She had avoided mirrors that morning, but if she looked as exhausted as she felt, then she was sure she was not a pleasant sight to behold.

"Eleanor." Narcissa gasped, her eyes filling quickly. "Don't you worry about a thing, we'll make up a room for you. You'll be well taken care of there darling. Lucius, Draco and I will take care of you."

"T-they left everything to me." Eleanor stuttered out, half heartedly returning her hug.

"Of course they did, dear." Narcissa offered a soggy laugh. "It will all be yours when you turn 17. Until then, Lucius and I, we have you. You don't need to worry about a thing."

"No." Eleanor shook her head, removing herself from Narcissa's arms gently. "Everything is mine. Now. I own everything now." Narcissa and Lucius shared a look of confusion.

"Is that even legal, darling?" She asked her husband. Draco sat at the foot of Eleanor's bed. Narcissa wrapped Eleanor in her arms and the two women sat with their backs against the pillows. Lucius stood next to the bed and spared an annoyed glance at Harry, Ron, and Hermione who stood farther away.

"Do you think you lot could give us all a moment?" Eleanor asked her friends softly. They all nodded, though Ron looked annoyed that he was getting the boot. "Thank you all, for everything. We'll catch up." Eleanor tried to smile convincingly at them as the left.

"I don't understand why your parents would force you to live on your own. That doesn't make any sense." Lucius finally said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"It makes sense to me." Eleanor said. "I mean, I am at school most of the time anyway. They must have figured I would spend Christmas and Easter with you, and the summers would be the only time I would be alone, and even then, I think they figured I would be with 'Mione, or Ron, or Draco."

"Well that is why we just don't understand why they wouldn't make us your official guardians." Narcissa said calmly. "Who is going to report to your professors? Who is going to sign your permission slips? Deal with the school on your behalf?"

"Professor McGonagall, I expect." Eleanor answered simply. "My parents gave everything to me before I turned 17. They trusted me, why can't you?"

Lucius gave her a thin smile. "You're being very brave, but you don't have to. We will take care of things." He then turned away. "Now, where is that Pomfrey woman. I would like a word with her about the potion she gave you last night."

"I just want to go home." Eleanor sighed, laying her head on Narcissa's shoulder. Draco glanced at her sadly for a moment, before staring at his feet.

"Oh, I know sweet girl. I know." Narcissa hushed. "You can go home today and pack your things. Draco can help you if you like." Draco nodded.

"No. I would like to be alone." Eleanor said stiffly. "And I would like to stay."

"Eleanor, you are barely 15 years old. You cannot live by yourself." Narcissa snapped at her. Eleanor stood up quickly.

"My parents left everything to me. Neither your nor Lucius' name was found anywhere in that will. It's all mine. Now, I am going to my home, by myself, where I can grieve in private." Eleanor snapped. She began to feel the potion slowly fading. Sadness and guilt and anxiety tugged at the edges of her heart, but was not enough to send her spiraling out of control. Only enough to make her lash out through anger. Draco stood now, startled by her ferocity. Narcissa looked shocked, and fell silent.

"It's not safe for you there." Narcissa continued reasoning, becoming desperate because she knew that Eleanor was stubborn to a fault and could never be wrong. Narcissa and Lucius were not expecting her to be so unfeeling, and so reasonable this soon after the death of her parents.

"It is safer for me there than anywhere else." Eleanor crossed her short arms across her chest. Draco smirked to himself at her stubborn pout. He knew that his mother would lose this argument. The determination in Eleanor's eye was unmistakable.

"Your parents are not there to protect you anymore. You need someone protecting you." Narcissa was beginning to feel herself going hysterical. Eleanor was so young, she could not do things on her own.

Eleanor thought for a moment about confiding in Narcissa about the protection spells her parents had placed around the house. However, she went against her judgement and didn't. She knew Narcissa would ask for permission to enter, and Eleanor felt that she could not refuse her. It wasn't that Eleanor didn't trust the Malfoys, it was more about the fact that she simply wanted to be alone without anyone barging in on her. She needed to figure things out on her own.

"The ministry will be investigating their deaths, they will need to question you. It will all be too overwhelming." Narcissa cried. "What about the funeral planning?"

Eleanor looked at her shoes, she had not thought as far as a funeral yet. "I hadn't thought about that." Eleanor conceded lightly. Narcissa sighed and held out her hand for Eleanor to take. Draco was confused watching Eleanor give in. Eleanor always got her way. Especially when she was dealing with a Malfoy.

"I'll be sure to have the gardens perfectly trimmed for their memorials." Narcissa promised quietly.

"Perfect. You were right, I don't know if I am ready to host a hoard of people in my home." Eleanor kissed Narcissa's head softly, smirking to herself about the way she twisted her words to get exactly what she wanted. Her nerve was quickly fading though. Eleanor felt her sadness crawling up her body, the doors to her heart that the potion had barred shut were weakening.

"Now, Eleanor, you know that isn't what I meant." Narcissa crossed her arms disapprovingly.

"But it is what you said." Eleanor smirked at Narcissa. "I'll come over for dinner. Every night if you want me to." The older woman wouldn't look at Eleanor. Draco watched this interaction, he knew his mother's succession meant that Eleanor had gotten her way. "I just lost my parents. I don't want to lose my home too."

"You will be all alone." Narcissa began crying. "I don't want you to be alone."

"Would it make you feel better if Draco came with me tonight?" Eleanor finally asked. Narcissa was still.

"I'll make sure she is okay, mum." Draco finally spoke.

"Lucius will never have it." Narcissa shook her head. "He won't. He won't stand for it."

"What won't I stand for?" Lucius asked, coming up to the bed. Eleanor straightened her shoulders.

"I am going home. And I am staying there. Draco will stay with me tonight, and I will be at the Malfoy Manor tomorrow for dinner." Eleanor stated confidently. Lucius simply scoffed.

"No, that won't be happening." He shook his head. Narcissa nodded at him in agreement. "Darling, you are being very brave, which I blame that damned potion for. You are not thinking clearly. In a few days time you are going to be extremely sad again, and you will be all alone in that house."

"I won't be alone." Eleanor shook her head. "Draco will be with me."

"We will keep Draco at the Malfoy Manor." Lucius countered.

"Then I will have Hermione, or Ron, or Harry stay with me. Or all of them. Draco is not my only friend." Eleanor held her chin high.

"Why are you doing this?" Lucius asked, his knuckles white on his cane. "I want a straight and honest answer from you."

Eleanor paused for a moment, looking at Lucius, trying to decipher if he was really serious. "I grew up in that home. That's my home. Your home isn't my home. That is my place. That is our place. I can't just let it sit empty. There are things in that home that I want to be close to. I want my mother's perfume, and my father's coats and I want to be able to smell them on their pillows and tend to my mother's flowers. I want to be close to them." Eleanor sighed, her heart feeling a little heavy. She was just glad she could feel something.

"One night in the house." Lucius finally agreed. "Get your affairs in order, pack your things." Eleanor furrowed her brows. She knew she wasn't going to fight anymore with Lucius, but she also knew that he couldn't force her to do anything. He had no legal claim over her. "We love you dear, we are here for you." His voice was cold when he said those, but still, Eleanor knew that he meant them. He seldom ever said things like that.

"Thank you." Eleanor nodded, smiling at the Malfoys. "I should probably go pack up my dorm room."

"Well, we will go then. We will see you tomorrow evening." Narcissa said. "Have the spells been lifted? On the castle?" She asked. Eleanor nodded her head. "Oh good, so Draco will be able to Floo with you. Pack an overnight bag Draco, and we will get the rest of your belongings. Dumbledore gave us the okay to let you both go home a few days early."

The Malfoys went towards the dungeons, and Eleanor slowly walked up to Gryffindor tower, her heart aching a little more with each passing moment, but it was easy enough to ignore. When she entered her dorm room, she found that Hermione and Professor McGonagall had already packed up her things for her.

"Thank you. Thank you both." Eleanor said gratefully, wrapping them both in a hug.

"What happens next?" Hermione asked. Eleanor sighed a bit and looked at her feet.

"I am going back home. Draco is going to stay with me for a while. Narcissa and Lucius think I am living with them, but that isn't likely to happen, really. I will probably just end up staying at home most of the time."

"That sounds rather lonely." Hermione said. Even though Eleanor's curly haired friend did not like the Malfoy family in the slightest, she knew that they would offer endless support to Eleanor. Hermione didn't like the idea of Eleanor being alone. Eleanor would never complain or ask anything of anybody. She was good at taking things upon herself so as not to be a burden to others, and Hermione could only imagine how exhausting that was for her. "Write to me, I'll stay with you this summer. I can stay for a few nights or a few weeks, whatever you need."

"Thanks 'Mione."

"Of course, Eleanor."

Professor McGonagall smiled at the two girls. "I will handle your academics, and be your guardian in that sense. Don't worry about anything. I will see you next autumn."

Eleanor smiled at her professor. She did find it a bit odd that her parents left her without a guardian this young. Perhaps they did not expect to be gone from her life when she was still so young, but her parents were thorough planners, and Eleanor couldn't imagine what would overcome them to leave her alone. Imagine she had been younger, who would she have gone to then?

"There is also this." Professor McGonagall handed her an envelope with her name written on it. It was her mother's hand, she could tell from the way the 'L' in her name curled. "It came with the will with instructions that you open it when you are alone."

Eleanor took the envelope and looked at her mother's writing and smiled sadly. "Thank you." She wanted to hold it to her heart, but she needed to get home. Eleanor shoved the letter in her bag and slung it over her shoulder before grabbing her trunk and heading down to meet Draco at Dumbledore's office.

"Be sure to write, I will come stay with you anytime." Hermione reminded her friend.

"Likewise." Ron smiled. Harry gave Eleanor a hug, and whispered to her to be careful. The Malfoys walked up and did their best to hide their disgust at the Gryffindor crew for Eleanor's sake.

"You ready, love?" Narcissa asked.

"Yes." Eleanor stated with confidence that was fading. The Malfoys walked with Eleanor up to Dumbledore's Office. Eleanor was a bit nervous about the logistics of getting Draco into Cordarri Castle. She had told Narcissa that the spells had been lifted, when in reality they were still set very firmly in place. Regine had said something about Eleanor's permission being required, but Eleanor was unsure exactly what that meant. Did Eleanor have to be with him? Or could she just tell him that he had permission? Perhaps Dumbledore would know, but she didn't want to ask in front of the Malfoy's.

"Alright dearies, in the fireplace you go. Remember to be at the manor with all of your things for dinner tomorrow." Narcissa gave both Eleanor and Draco big hugs.

"Actually, I wanted to talk to Dumbledore about some academic things very quickly, perhaps you two should go first." Eleanor smiled sweetly at the two older Malfoys, then looking at her Headmaster, hoping he would not call her bluff. His eyes twinkled knowingly and nodded once at her.

Lucius and Narcissa looked apprehensive, but decided to listen to Eleanor and went up in green flames back to their home

"Professor, when it comes to needing 'permission'..." Eleanor trailed off, unsure if she wanted Draco to know about what exactly the spells on her home were. Dumbledore held up a hand.

"Once it is explicitly given once, then it is no longer needed again." He answered. To Draco, this answer seemed very vague, and Eleanor's question was incomplete, but Eleanor nodded in understanding and grabbed Draco's robe sleeve. She pulled him towards the fireplace with both of their things in hand.

"I'll just follow you, it is too much stuff to fit in there." Draco shook her off.

"No, it'll fit. Come on, come to my home with me." Eleanor invited, hoping that was explicit enough for the spells to accept Draco.

Apparently it was, because they both appeared on the other side of the fireplace with all of their things.


	3. Chapter 3

It was shocking to Eleanor how everything in her home was the same, and yet not the same at all. Draco watched his friend as she set down all of her things and simply stared at the house around her. He was unsure of what to do. Should he comfort her? Should he say something? Make a joke? Should he leave her be? He was so unsure of what she needed.

"I think I am going to need to get a dog." Eleanor finally let out. Draco knew that she wouldn't have said that if she didn't have that potion running through her veins. Eleanor, as brave as she was, was a very emotional person who felt things so deeply. Normal Eleanor would not be cracking jokes when she was faced with her empty house for the first time. "A bit lonely in here."

"You won't be lonely with us, though." Draco pointed out, reminding her that she was still living with the Malfoys. Eleanor let out a laugh.

"You really thought I was serious when I promised your father I would live with you?" Eleanor chuckled a bit. "You seem to have lost all faith in me, Draco."

Draco was confused and worried for his friend, but smiled at her cunning mind and inability to lose an argument. She was a Gryffindor, but she was raised by Slytherins and it showed.

"They won't let that happen, you know. They will take you out of here kicking and screaming if they have to." Draco chuckled, grabbing her bags and heading for the stairs to take her things up to her room for her.

"They won't be able to get here." Eleanor cracked a smile. "Only you and I can set foot in this house now. Eventually Hermione and Ron and Harry too. The spells weren't lifted, but only my blood relatives can be here now unless granted explicit permission."

Draco was shocked. Eleanor had been toying with his parents and lying to get her way since the death of her own. He was impressed at this potion. Perhaps if Eleanor wasn't so heartfelt, and emotional then she would've found herself in Slytherin.

"You wouldn't honestly deny them access to the house, would you?" Draco asked, chuckling a bit as the pair walked up the stairs.

"If they were going to take me from my house, then I most certainly would." Eleanor replied quickly. "They can throw all the fits they want, they have no legal claim over me."

"Why are you doing this, Eleanor?" Draco finally asked. There it was. Her full name. She hated it when he used it. It felt like he was scolding her, she knew it meant he wasn't happy with her. It wasn't endearing, even when he would say it in an endearing voice, there would still be negative intentions behind it. His tone made Eleanor extremely cross and extremely defensive. "Doing what?" Eleanor asked as they entered the threshold of her room. She was always so happy to see her large bed and all of her pictures and knick knacks.

"Why aren't you letting us help you? We aren't trying to imprison you, we want to be there for you. My parents really love you. I know they can be cold, and they don't show their love very well. Believe me, I know that better than anyone, but you would be well taken care of. You wouldn't be lonely. Eleanor, let us help you." Draco set her bags down in the middle of her room, but Eleanor stood firmly in the doorway.

Eleanor wanted to yell at him for using her full name, but he didn't know that she hated it when he did that. That was also the biggest giveaway whenever Draco was angry or annoyed with her, and she didn't want to tell him what gave away his poker face. So she just huffed and looked at the floor. "I'm not doing it because I have anything against your family. I love your family, Draco, and you know I do. I just feel a loyalty to this house."

"What are you trying to prove by being here? That you're brave? That you're like your Gryffindor friends because you can isolate yourself from people?" Draco was getting defensive now too. He could tell that Eleanor was peeved, and he didn't like that, he couldn't help but think it was him who caused her to be that way. He didn't like thinking about anything that he did that would've put her in a bad mood, he didn't like thinking he caused it. But now he was defending himself because he was prideful, and because he could not lose an argument (just like her) and because he was so incredibly sad for her, but he didn't know how to portray that feeling without getting emotional so he just channeled it all into anger.

"What do you mean? You think I am trying to prove something?" Eleanor scoffed at her friend. "Maybe I just want to sleep in my own bed, in the room I grew up in. I know where everything is, I know it is safe here. I know that I can go down the hall and see their things whenever I want to. I know there are pictures of the three of us around every corner. Draco, I am happy here. This is my home."

"They aren't coming back, Eleanor. You can't just sit around and wait for them to come back." Draco finally let out.

Eleanor wanted to cry. She wished she wasn't so damn angry, or at least that she was more sad. She wanted to cry because Draco was right, that was part of the reason she was staying. She would never get used to being in the house alone. She could fool herself into thinking they were down the hall, or downstairs. It was a big house, she could fool herself into thinking they were just in a different rooms and their paths didn't cross. Life would be too different with the Malfoys. He had figured her out, he always did. And now her heart felt like it might burst in anger because not only was he challenging her, but he figured out the inner workings of her mind without her giving anything away.

"I know they aren't coming back, Draco. I know that they're dead. You don't need to remind me." Eleanor finally yelled. The pure fury coursing through her veins was only leading to the intense sadness she knew that she was going to begin feeling. "I'm not stupid. I know they're dead."

Draco always got a bit frightened when Eleanor was actually mad. Since he was little, her fury always made him shut up and put him in his place. They were both guilty of teasing each other, and being annoyed at one another, and Draco often pushed her buttons more than he should have, but her pure, unfiltered anger was what usually shut him up. Eleanor was a forgiving, kind and loving person. Her anger often took the form of sadness, or embarrassment. It took something nearly unforgivable to make Eleanor rage in the true sense of the word. So, he knew that this fury, and these yells were not sincere anger, but gut wrenching sadness masked as wrath. And he didn't know what to do.

"I never said you were stupid." Draco left out softly, trying to let go of his own defensive nature. It was hard for him to change the way he was and reacted to situations like this. But he knew that Eleanor needed him now. And she needed him to not be an ass.

Eleanor was slightly annoyed that she could not keep fighting with Draco, because as soon as his soft words filled the space between them, her hard heart crumpled and she began to feel depleted with overwhelming sorrow. "Draco, they are never coming back." Eleanor squeaked out, leaning against the doorframe for support as her eyes filled with tears. Draco panicked. He was unsure of what to do the moment she began to cry. He was not expecting this so soon. He thought she had a few more days of not feeling this awful pain.

Draco crossed the room to hug her. He was awkward and not sure if a hug is what she needed. She slid down the wall, her cries were not as violent as the were the night before, but somehow these were worse. These cries broke Draco's heart. These weren't sobs of initial shock. These were her real tears where she let out how she was really feeling. They came out in small, defeated whimpers. Draco could tell she was trying to hold it in, she was trying not to let herself feel this way. She would go a few seconds of holding her breath, but would fail and let it out in heartbroken blubbers. Draco sat there and held her silently.

He wasn't sure how long he sat there as she cried. She eventually let out shuddering breaths and began wiping her own eyes with the sleeves of her 'E' jumper. Once she had no more tears, she finally looked at Draco.

"Thank you." She breathed out. Draco noticed how she didn't look as bad as she did last night. Yes, her eye was still filled with blood on one side from the night before, and her eyes were swollen from the cry she just had now, but she wasn't as gross and un-Eleanor-like as she had been the last time. Draco was grateful for that. He was having a hard enough time dealing with an emotional Eleanor, he wasn't sure that he could handle and incoherent one on top of it. "I'm sorry." Eleanor finally sighed, standing up, and removing herself from Draco's arms.

"What are you sorry for?" Draco wondered, watching Eleanor curiously as she went into her bathroom and came out wiping her eyes with a tissue.

"I know that helping people with emotional things is hard for you." Eleanor shrugged. "I know that you feel like you don't know how to help and it makes you feel awkward. I shouldn't have put you in that position."

Draco couldn't help but roll his eyes. "El, do you hear yourself? Stop thinking of other people and for once just think about yourself." His voice was firm because he really meant what he was saying, but he wasn't angry. "I don't care if you put me in an awkward position by crying in front of me. I put you through hell and you still make it very clear that you would do anything for me. Stop thinking about me, stop thinking about the comfort of others and do what you need to do." Draco told her. Eleanor smiled at him a little. She liked when Draco could be honest with her. He hardly ever told anyone anything about what he was feeling, so she was appreciative when she got to hear his honest, unfiltered thoughts. Even if she didn't necessarily agree with him.

"Well, then thank you." Eleanor said with a watery smile.

Draco wanted to tell her off again for thanking him too much, when in reality he felt that he did very little for her, but he decided to just accept it. "Are you hungry?" Draco finally asked. Eleanor nodded weakly and the two walked out of her room down to the kitchens. Draco was a bit out of his element, he had never cooked anything in his life, and only ever went into his kitchen at home to eat whatever had already been made. Eleanor, however, loved to cook.

Draco tried to make her laugh as he sat on the counters and she made pasta. Draco could tell that brave Eleanor was trying to put on a face that she was fine, but they both knew that the damned potion had worn off and that Eleanor was currently a shell of who she usually was.

"You would be a rubbish chef." Draco finally told her as she sliced vegetables, trying to tease her to lighten the mood. He wanted things to be like they used to be. He couldn't stand seeing her sad.

"What do you mean?" Eleanor said with a half laugh, shocked that he would say such a thing.

"Your technique is simply awful." He gestured to the knife in her hands. "I am just waiting for you to cut off a finger."

Eleanor rolled her eyes at Draco. "Would you like to try it then?" She challenged.

"Oh, absolutely not." Draco threw up his hands. "Just offering you critiques."

"Do you want to eat tonight, or not?" Eleanor inquired, arching her brow at him as she continued cutting.

"Not if there is a finger in whatever you serve me." Draco replied cheekily. "Watch what you're doing, for Merlin's sake, El!" He laughed, but was genuinely worried that Eleanor would, in fact, cut off her own finger. Eleanor offered a half smile and returned her eyes to the knife. Draco felt somewhat panicked now. He was really trying to make things normal. He wanted to make things easier for her. "Where'd you learn to cook anyway?" Draco asked, taking one of the vegetables from the cutting board and eating it.

"Hey, I needed that." Eleanor scolded, her voice rose in an almost laugh-like manner. This gave Draco a glimmer of hope.

"Do you want it back?" He questioned. Eleanor scrunched up her nose in disgust at the thought. Draco chuckled at her, but did not press it any further. He was still cautious and testing the waters of what he could and could not say.

So Draco just watched as Eleanor silently moved about the kitchen, add vegetables and spices and draining one pot while fill another and stirring. She didn't cry, but she looked like she wanted to a few times. Draco was utterly confused by her. He was afraid that after the potion wore off she would be the way he found her last night, but she was the same brave El that he had grown up with. She shielded herself, and Draco couldn't understand why she wouldn't let anyone in.

She had surprised him earlier that day. He had never known Eleanor to be able to twist her words and shield the truth like she had in the face of his parents. She would fight tooth and nail until she won, but she was always honest and straightforward. That was one of the biggest downfalls between her and him. They were both stubborn and prideful and determined to get their way, but they did things so differently that it usually caused a discourse. Eleanor hated when Draco tried to outwit someone or be underhanded when it came to getting his way. Eleanor preferred to lay all her cards on the table and prove she was in the right-which, as much as Draco hated to admit, she usually was.

A selfish part of him wished she was more like she was on that potion all of the time. Draco wished that he could have been able to see her as a Slytherin, grown up with her in his house. Things would be easier if that were the case. He would get to see her more, he wouldn't hate her friends. He wouldn't feel like every time he talked to her he was committing some kind of treason.

Once the timer went off for Eleanor's noodles, Draco hopped up, trying to be helpful. He carried the pot to the sink and poured the boiling water out, leaving the noodles in the strainer. Cooking was so foreign to him, and especially cooking without magic. Cooking without magic was different for Eleanor too, but she was alright with it. She liked manually doing things, it kept her muscles and mind busy.

Some of the boiling water splashed up onto Draco's arm, leaving a few red welts splattered about his forearm.

"Shit." He yelped out, dropping the pot into the sink and pressing his hand to his new burns.

"Oh, honestly Draco, you are an imbecile." Eleanor shook her head, but her face held a hint of a smile. "Run it under some cold water, we have a salve around here somewhere." Eleanor instructed as she left to investigate the medicine cabinet. She found the burn salve that her mother had bought a few months before in Diagon Alley. It came in handy quite often, as the Cordarris all loved to cook. "Okay, I got you some salve, and a wrap." Eleanor announced to Draco, who still had his arm under the cold water. "Let me see the damage."

Draco held his arm out. "It's not that bad." He rolled his eyes. "Just hurts a bit." But he winced when she dabbed the water off his arm with a towel. She eyed him in amusement.

Carefully, she put some of the salve on each of the welts on his arm, then carefully tied bandages around each one. She made sure she was never too rough with him. "Leave this on for an hour, and your arm should be as good as new." Eleanor smiled, patting his shoulder, and returning the supplies to the medicine cabinet.

Draco smiled after her. She was always taking care of people, always loving people, even when it was her who needed to be taken care of. Sometimes especially when it was her that needed to be taken care of.

Yes, perhaps if Eleanor wasn't so heartfelt then she would have grown up with Draco in Slytherin, but then she wouldn't have truly been Eleanor.


	4. Chapter 4

**Quick Note: **Most of the time my updates won't be this frequent but I wanted to get a few of my first chapters out there to get the ball rolling. This has been hidden in my folders for awhile and I would only write it for me, but I'm working on being brave and open with what I do, so I just want to put some of my stuff out here! Let me know what you think!

* * *

When Eleanor went to bed that night, she knew that she would not sleep. She was completely heartbroken. And although she was exhausted from the emotionally trying hours she had experienced, her mind was swimming with too many thoughts.

Draco offered to stay on the floor of her room, which Eleanor found extremely endearing that her friend would go out of his way and be uncomfortable so that she would not be alone. However, Eleanor declined his offer and set him up in the guest bedroom right next to her room. She promised to go to him if she needed anything, but the truth was she just wanted to read that letter that her parents had left her with the will, she wanted to know what they had to say to her.

As much as Eleanor wanted to read it, she took her time eyeing it. She was in one of her father's shirts, she was showered and had done everything that one could possibly do before ending their nightly routine. So now Eleanor just paced in front of her bed, looking at her name written in her mother's beautiful hand. This was it. These were their last words to her, and once she read them, they would have nothing more to say.

Biting firmly on her thumb nail, Eleanor stopped herself mid-pace and finally forced herself to sit down and open the damn thing. She was disappointed at the lack of pages she found inside the envelope, part of her expecting a long, grandiose, novel-type letter. But that simply wasn't so.

_Our Dearest Eleanor, _

_If you're reading this, it means that your father and I have passed before your 17th birthday. The first thing we would like to say to you is we are so incredibly sorry that we can no longer be there for you in a physical sense, but we want to remind you that we are always in your heart if you choose to carry us along-we hope you do. _

_All three of us do not do very well with things that are not planned. We should have prepared you better for the reality of life, that things get messy and surprises happen often. We hope that despite the sorrow you are sure to be feeling, you will find the strength to continue being the wonderfully kind, and loving young woman that we know you to be. We also hope that you will not be afraid to ask for help if you need it. We like to think that we know you quite well after these past years, so we know how you don't ask for help. You need to, darling. _

_We have a few pieces of advice and information to give you. As hard as we might've tried, we were not the perfect parents in many ways. We tried to leave you with some protection. The spells set up around the Castle are very old spells and have been in place for a long while. Only you can lift the spells protecting yourself from the outside world when you are ready. Be especially cautious of those you allow entrance to. Even people you love and trust might not be who they say they are. It is best to protect yourself for a while. _

_We also know that you are probably confused as to why we did not leave you with a specifically stated guardian. Lucius and Narcissa are our best friends, and we know Draco is a very good friend of yours as well. The reason we did not name them your guardians has nothing to do with them, and nearly all to do with you. You are kind, and warm and intelligent and mature beyond your years. You are more equipped to be on your own than you would be for adjusting to environment that the Malfoys have in their home. _

_There is something that your father and I planned on telling you when you came of age. Unfortunately, we will not be there when that happens. We didn't keep this from you out of spite or because we wanted to hurt you. All parties involved agreed that it would be best if this part of your life stayed a secret until you were old enough to make sense of it Your father and I were unable to have children, though we so desperately wanted children. You are not biologically ours. Your biological father is a man named Remus Lupin, we believe you have met him before. He has a condition that prevents him from raising a child, and we could not have children ourselves. Your mother is a muggle, however, she has no recollection of your birth, or her relationship with Mr. Lupin. Legally, we leave you in the care of him, however with the assets we leave you, there is no reason for you to meet him if you do not feel comfortable doing so. _

_We have always felt guilty about not telling you the truth, but we did not want to confuse you and Mr. Lupin did not wish to get in the way of our family. Now that we are gone, we suggest you reach out to the man, however that choice is entirely up to you. _

_We trust you. We love you. We miss you greatly. We are always with you. We will meet again someday our sweet, sweet Eleanor. _

_Love Always, _

_Mum and Dad _

Eleanor was shaking. She was confused. She couldn't make sense of the contents of the letter. She read it and reread it. Her eyes were glassy with tears. Everything she thought about her childhood wasn't true. Her parents, her dearly beloved parents, weren't even genuinely related to her. Their blood wasn't in her veins. They were gone from the earth, and Eleanor wasn't even left as their legacy.

At first, Eleanor thought she was angry with her parents for not telling her, but she quickly realized that her old professor would not have been able to raise her, and she wouldn't trade her childhood for anything. Eleanor wanted to second guess her whole life up to this point, but she couldn't. She knew her parents loved her and gave her a good life whether or not they were the actual people to give her life. They didn't steal her from anywhere. They gave her a fighting chance that, perhaps, her biological parents could not have.

It made sense then why her parents were never really fans of Professor Lupin. Or why her former professor was withholding from her at first, and why he took such a liking to her once she broke his barrier down. She understood why Lupin could not have taken care of her, especially if her biological mother was not in the picture. However, knowing that her mother was not around did not stop Eleanor from wondering who this woman might have been.

Eleanor's curiosity was piqued, however she had to remind herself that these two virtual strangers would not complete her or replace the void in her heart. Eleanor could not get her hopes up for a miraculous healing from the loss of her two real parents, her best and oldest friends. She knew that her parents had left her with this information so that she could have someone, a parent-like figure, to help her through. But deep in her heart, Eleanor knew that meeting Lupin once again would only awaken a new part of her identity, and not bring peace to her grieving heart.

Eleanor set down the letter and took a deep breath. Her mind was cluttered and confused. Of course she wanted to reach out and talk to her biological father, but she wanted to do so at a time that was respectful to her real father. No matter how much she respected or grew to like Lupin, he would never replace the father that raised her; her first love and biggest supporter.

While Eleanor sat on her bedroom floor, reeling from shock, there was a knock on her door. Eleanor wiped her eyes quickly, and shot up to put her letter on the table beside her bed.

"Come in." She called out, not realizing before how shaky her voice was. Eleanor tried to climb onto her bed casually to give the illusion that she had not been on the ground in tears moments before. Draco walked in, looking shocked by the light and looking half asleep.

"Hey." Eleanor said quietly, clearing her throat a bit. Draco didn't move past the door frame.

"Hey." Draco repeated. "I was just going to the bathroom, I saw that your light was still on. I just wanted to make sure you're okay."

Eleanor smiled up at her friend, grateful for his thoughtfulness, despite being a bit shocked by it. "I'm alright." Eleanor nodded.

"I could stay here, if you wanted." Draco offered, looking as though he didn't really want to stay, but that he should have at least offered.

"I'll be okay, Draco." Eleanor cracked a smile, trying to prove that she really was alright to be left alone for a few hours.

Draco nodded once more, unsure of what to say next. "Would you want to go out to breakfast tomorrow? My treat."

"Tired of my cooking already, hmm?" Eleanor raised a brow, her watery eyes gave away that she had been crying but her playful tone still sounded like her, and Draco was grateful he could still see Eleanor despite her being heartbroken.

"The final product is fine, watching you is more stress than I think I could handle that early in the morning." Draco smirked at her, leaning on the doorframe and crossing his arms. He was delighted to see Eleanor laugh at his jokes. She tucked a strand of her long brown locks behind her ear.

"Breakfast sounds good." Eleanor nodded. "But you're daft if you think it is your treat." She challenged. Draco appreciated the spark in her words, and though he knew there would be furthering arguing about it the next morning, he let it rest there.

"Alright, we'll make a day of it." Draco nodded, pushing himself off the door frame and turning to leave.

"You know, you're a really good friend, Draco. You have a good heart when you aren't being a total prick." Eleanor smiled at her friend before he left her room.

Draco grabbed the doorknob and began closing her door with a smile. "That's the catch, though. I am a total prick."

Eleanor held up her thumb and pointer finger an inch or so apart and smiled at him. "Just a little one." She lowered her hand, and looked into his cold eyes that weren't so cold when he met hers. "Really, Draco. You're a good person. You care about people."

Draco looked almost guilty as he looked at the ground. He couldn't understand how she, Eleanor, the best person he knew, Eleanor, who cared about anyone and everyone, Eleanor, who loved widely and unconditionally, could ever think that Draco was a good friend, or a good person. He didn't understand her. He didn't think he ever would. He wanted to fight her, to show her that she was wrong. He wanted to tell her that she was too forgiving, too loving, too hopeful for the world. The world would squash her, ruin her. He would squash her, ruin her. But he didn't fight her, not that time. He knew how much she loved to be right, so he just let it rest.

"Just don't let the word get out." He finally said quietly, before returning to his room to spend the rest of the night thinking about her.


	5. Chapter 5

When Eleanor walked down the stairs the next morning, Draco was already waiting for her in the kitchen. His white button up sleeves were folded neatly to his elbows, and his pale hands held a book. Eleanor tried to focus on the cover of it to see what he was so enthralled with reading. Before she could fully read the cover, Draco closed it and put it on the counter.

"Good morning." He greeted, smiling at her. He noticed the purple bags under her eyes almost immediately. His heart squeezed in guilt, knowing he should have fought harder to stay in her room with her.

"You look nice." She noted. "Dressing up on my account?" She raised a playful brow.

"You seem to be doing the same." Draco commented, gesturing to her plain black dress. Both Draco and Eleanor looked very sleek and sophisticated. The Malfoys and the Cordarris disagreed on many things when it came to parenting, but one thing they always agreed on was that it was important to look your best. They were proud of their heritage and who they were, and as such they always liked to put their best foot forward.

"Sometimes I forget how to dress myself once I come back from school." Eleanor chuckled, trying to make small talk while picking at the hem of her dress and tapping to the toe of her nude, heel in discomfort. She felt Draco's eyes on her, looking her over in silence. Her teeth pulled at her bottom lip as her stomach twisted in uncomfortable knots.

"Those damn Hogwarts robes are probably the least flattering things on everyone." Draco tried to joke, tearing his eyes away from Eleanor. He had spent his whole night thinking about her, and actually seeing her in the morning made him realize that his fantasies about her never did actually do her justice.

An awkward silence hung in the air. Eleanor didn't particularly want to go out with Draco. She wasn't looking forward to leaving her home. In all honesty, dressing herself this morning took an extraordinary amount of energy and she was now drained. But Draco was so insistent and Eleanor would feel guilty for canceling.

"Are you ready to go?" Draco asked, feeling uncomfortable that Eleanor looked so on edge. He understood why she did, and he didn't blame her, but he didn't know how to reach her. He wanted to drag her out of the state she was in. She wasn't really Eleanor, not fully. He missed her, he wanted her back. He would never admit it out loud, but she really was his best friend, and he enjoyed his time spent with her more than he enjoyed the time he spent with any of his housemates.

Eleanor nodded once, rubbing her hands together uncomfortably. She felt wrong leaving the house so soon, she wanted to stay home. Her heart hurt at the thought of leaving, she almost told Draco this, but as she opened her mouth to decline his plans, he informed her that he had made reservations at one of the nicer restaurants in Diagon Alley. One that he knew was Eleanor's favorite.

Eleanor felt guilty then for thinking of backing out. Draco seldom ever put this much thought into Eleanor and spending time with her. She wanted to show that she was appreciative of it, so she swallowed her sadness at leaving her beloved home and followed Draco to the fireplace.

It was summer, and the air was warm and pleasant. The sun lifted Eleanor's spirits, but only slightly. It made her yearn to be in her mother's beautiful garden. Draco held the door to the restaurant open for Eleanor to step into.

"Reservation for Malfoy." He smiled charmingly at the hostess who led the two to their table. The restaurant was buzzing with polite business men and women conversing and negotiating deals over lunch. Many ministry folk were about, and most of them recognized Draco and Eleanor based on their fathers. Lucius being a ministry man himself, and Darius being a well known lawyer, and the son of an influential businessman whose companies were still popular both locally and internationally. Everyone knew Draco and Eleanor, and everyone knew the tragedy that Eleanor had just faced. A hush fell over the room when Draco and Eleanor were seated.

"We shouldn't have come, this was stupid." Draco muttered to himself angrily as he felt the eyes of his parent's peers all looking down on Eleanor. In the moment, he didn't care about himself so much. He watched Eleanor shift uncomfortably, with tears in her eyes. Eleanor tried to keep them at bay. Draco had put in considerable effort after all.

"It's fine, Draco." She shook her head, but didn't look up from her menu. He knew she was hiding her emotions in an attempt to be strong. He rolled his eyes at her, reached across the table and removed the menu from her hands so he could see her fully. "I'm fine." She said as she removed a single tear from the corner of her eye. "It's just...they all knew them, and my parents took me here often. It's just a lot to process right now." Eleanor shook her head, picking up her menu again.

"We can go." Draco supplied, a little disappointed his grand plan to make her feel better was backfiring.

"No, no. It was lovely of you to plan this for me Draco. We're staying." Eleanor said firmly. She grabbed the arm of a waiter passing by and pulled him back to the table. "We're ready, I believe." She informed, Draco was a little surprised at her bold action. Eleanor had always been very polite when it came to the help, waiters and waitresses. Kinder than he ever was.

"I'll have the special, he'll have the lobster pasta. And how about two fire whiskeys on the rocks?" Eleanor flashed her best upper class, Pureblood smile. A privilege she seldom ever used.

"Are you over 17, miss?" He asked. Eleanor took a swift look at his name tag.

"Martin," she started, looking up at him through her eyelashes "I am flattered by your compliment, but if I was 17, wouldn't I still be in school?" Martin, the server, looked obviously flustered and glanced at Eleanor's hand still on his forearm. He turned dark pink and nodded quickly before returning to the kitchens.

"How unlike you, El." Draco commented, but had to admit he was impressed with her.

"When you need a drink, you need a drink." Eleanor shrugged, tapping her foot impatiently, waiting for Martin to return so she could numb the hole in her heart for the afternoon.

"I will agree with you there." Draco smirked. "And you know my order?"

"You're ridiculous, of course I do. We've been here countless times together and you always get the same thing. You really aren't as mysterious as you try to be, Draco Malfoy."

* * *

Draco thought that the two drinks Eleanor ordered were for the two of them, however Eleanor downed both of them before their meals even came, then ordered two more. Draco was able to sip a bit of the second round, but Eleanor still drank most of it. Draco was anxious now, looking around at friends of their parents, eyeing them suspiciously. Especially now, with Eleanor drunk before noon and chomping loudly on ice. He was waiting for Martin to come back with the bill so he could get Eleanor home before she made a fool of herself.

Draco quickly dumped a few galleons on the table to pay for their meal and tip Martin, who, Draco was sure, knew they weren't over 17 and continued serving them drinks anyway.

"Come along, love." Draco said, holding his arm out for Eleanor to take. "Let's get you home."

"Do we still have to go to dinner with your parents tonight?" Eleanor asked in a slightly whiny voice. Her cheeks were rosy from the alcohol and her eyes her drooping a little. Draco knew Eleanor got tired when she was drunk. He suspected she would be needing a nap.

"I'm afraid we probably do." Draco sighed a little, as he led her out of the restaurant and into the crowded streets of Diagon Alley.

"Draco, I really don't want to." Eleanor began shaking her head, she looked like she might start crying. "I want to go lay out in the flowers."

"I think we are going to get you some water first." Draco informed his friend, pulling her over to a public Floo.

Eleanor took her arm out of Draco's and looked at him in disbelief. "You think I'm drunk." Eleanor accused. Draco rolled his ice blue eyes at his clearly intoxicated friend as she wavered on her feet without the support of his arm. He chuckled lightly and gently grabbed her hand to pull her towards the fireplace.

"You are drunk." Draco laughed, Flooing the duo back to the Cordarri Castle.

"I am not." Eleanor shook her head stubbornly as the pair reentered her childhood home. "And why are you holding my hand like that." Eleanor looked at their still intertwined hands with an accusatory glare, but made no move to let go.

"I'm sorry." Draco said, flexing his fingers to try to release himself, even though he didn't really want to. Eleanor looked at him curiously. "I just didn't want you running off." Draco smirked a little, taking a step towards her to try to maneuver her into the kitchen so that he might be able to get her a glass of water. Eleanor made no move to step out of his path or walk with him.

"You confuse me." Eleanor whispered a little. Draco was close enough to smell the alcohol on her breath, but didn't move away. Somehow, it smelled enchanting rather than revolting when it came from Eleanor.

"Hmm?" Draco hummed, waiting for an explanation. Eleanor looked as though she was calculating what to say next, Draco knew from past experience that drunk Eleanor was arguing with what was left of sober Eleanor inside her head about whether or not she should say something. Draco also knew that drunk Eleanor nearly always won in situations like this.

"Sometimes you look at me like you are thinking about kissing me." Eleanor finally said flatly. Draco's heart sped off, but he made sure to remain stoic. Had he been found out? He always had a soft spot for Eleanor, and he had always been enchanted by her. More so than any other girl he had ever met. But he was sure to remain as emotionless as possible. Especially around her.

"Do you want me to?" Draco asked, wanting to take his chances when Eleanor's guard was down, but there was a nagging voice in his head reminding him that drunk, mourning Eleanor was not the Eleanor he wanted to kiss. He couldn't be blamed for trying to be charming though. He struggled to figure out if charming a drunk, mourning Eleanor was moral or not.

"You shouldn't. I'm drunk. My parents are dead." Eleanor said flatly, as if reading his mind. Part of her wanted Draco to lean closer and kiss her, and part of her wanted to run away. She figured that was the drunk and sober parts of herself arguing over what was right, and what she only wanted to do when she was under the influence.

"Then I won't." Draco stepped away from Eleanor.

"I'm going to remember this." Eleanor nodded. "I'm not that drunk."

Draco paled for a moment at the thought of Eleanor remembering his moment of weakness and putting together that he might have fancied her a bit. He quickly regained himself and took a step away. "Well, I won't embarrass you about it."

"What?" Eleanor furrowed her brows, trying to figure Draco out.

"You obviously were trying to kiss me there, El. I won't bring it up so you don't get embarrassed." Draco said, and left Eleanor in the foyer as he went to the kitchen to get her a glass of water. Eleanor wasn't sure how it was possible, but saying that ended up leaving her feeling more embarrassed and she couldn't quite understand why.


	6. Chapter 6

**A Quick Note: **Another very fast update, I felt bad because the last chapter was short, and I also feel that these two fit with each other very well. I'll wait a bit longer to post the next one and try to get on more of a consistent schedule. I appreciate hearing what you all think, it's affirming my decision to share this little secret project of mine and making me very excited to continue. We've got a long road ahead of us, and I'm working hard to make sure I'm still far ahead of all of you. I hope you're enjoying following along with Draco and Eleanor! Drop me a message or review to let me know what you think! Thank you for your time!

* * *

Eleanor sobered up just in time for her and Draco to leave to Malfoy Manor. Draco was not the least bit excited for dinner. Eleanor was annoyed, and angry and nervous from their encounter in the foyer earlier that day, and she was anticipating the inevitable blowout between Lucius, Narcissa and herself when she refused to stay there. Part of Eleanor wanted to give up that fight. Just move in with the Malfoys and call it done. Realistically she only had two summers to actually live there, and trying to argue with the Malfoys was exhausting. Her attachment to her home was great, but she was losing her passion in the sadness.

Eleanor was sitting in the gardens amongst her mother's beloved flowers when Draco came to fetch her for dinner.

"You ready to go?" Draco asked softly. Part of him felt badly for confusing and embarrassing her earlier, but he was mostly just relieved that he was able to hide his feelings from her. Their relationship was a constant battle for the upper hand, and each party was constantly trying to figure out the other while not revealing too much about themselves. It was a tiring game they played, but it was one they were both skilled at.

"I think I am going to stay with you and your parents." Eleanor sighed lightly.

Draco, who liked to think he knew what Eleanor was thinking before she did, was shocked by her revelation, but not necessarily disappointed. "What made you come to this conclusion?" Draco asked cautiously, sitting beside her.

"I'm tired, Draco." Eleanor let out lowly. "I don't want to have this fight tonight. I just want to rest for a little while. I just want to make your parents happy."

"They just want you to be happy, and if that means staying here-" Draco started, trying to be calming, he knew Eleanor liked a gentle touch.

"No, Draco." Eleanor cut him off sharply. "They want to keep an eye on me constantly. They want to do what they think is right by my parents because they are trying to honor them."

"Isn't that, by extension, helping you." Draco questioned. He was losing their little game of trying to figure each other out, he was utterly confused by her.

"My parents don't...didn't want me living with them. They left me everything, legally, there is a way it is all mine, and I can live alone and be fine." Eleanor let out. "I don't have to do this Draco, but I am because your parents deserve to feel like they are helping me in some way, and they deserve to feel connected to my parents, and I'm too lonely to lose them too."

"Eleanor, for fuck's sake, stop worrying about other people and do something for you." Draco finally said loudly in exasperation. He was expecting Eleanor to cower back at his words. She always did when he pointed out her obvious selflessness because she was always forgot to take care of herself, and Draco always reminded her of how important that endeavor truly was. But Eleanor continued to surprise Draco and do things that were not typical of her.

"I am, Draco!" She shouted at him. "I don't want to fight with them right now. I want to stay close to you, for what reason I have no fucking clue because you make everything so much harder, but I do. I want you to stick around. And I want to not have to take care of everything here on my own. I'm tired, Draco. My parents just died."

"You were so defendant of this house no more than 24 hours ago. What happened to that? Did something change in the past day that makes you want to leave it all behind?" Draco demanded.

"Why do you care, Draco?" Eleanor snapped, running an aggravated hand through her hair. She finally looked at Draco, and he saw the ferocity in her eyes that he loved and feared at the same time.

"Because I just want you to be happy!" Draco called out, shocked at himself for saying it. "I don't know, El. I just hate to see you give up on something that you obviously really wanted." Draco tried to cover up. Eleanor was too flustered by his unnecessary arguing that she didn't even pick up on the heavily masked endearing concern.

"Eventually, Draco, I am gonna live here full time. But I think for right now I have to figure some things out before I can abandon your parents." Eleanor was finally working to calm the situation, she didn't like arguing with Draco, despite the fact that she did it often.

"I-I don't want you to think that I don't want you living with us, I do." Draco sighed, letting go of his confusion and frustration with her. "I mean, I really do. I just don't want you to have to give something up if you don't want to do that. It isn't fair to you."

Eleanor nodded in appreciation and understanding but said nothing.

They sat in silence for a moment. Eleanor thought about Remus Lupin, and how she needed to reach out to him. Part of her was reluctant to do so, but she knew it was something that had to be done. She held no resentment towards the man. She even kind of liked the idea of him creating her. In a way, it brought more sense to her life. It made things more obvious as to why she was in Gryffindor, and why her and her parents looked nothing alike, and why her parents disliked him so much. She knew Remus would never truly replace her parents, he might have brought her into the world, but her parents crafted her to conquer it, and that is not something Eleanor would soon forget. However, Eleanor knew that she had to give it time, or else she would cling to Remus and use him to fill the void in her life rather than cherish him for who he truly was.

Eleanor worked over everything in her mind. Change was so hard for her to swallow, and it frustrated her sometimes. She liked her life for what it was, and now it was up in the air, and her thoughts swirled madly around in her brain. Draco watched her closely, wondering what on earth she could be thinking about, and frustrated that she wasn't speaking about it. He still had so much to figure out about her, and that annoyed him to no end. He thought himself the one who knew her best, she had asked for him in a fit of mad grief and he had taken care of her since, and he was angry that even after that, she wouldn't just tell him what was in her head. He selfishly felt entitled to all of Eleanor's thoughts, and Eleanor knew this. It was part of the reason she kept so much to herself. Draco was a dear friend to her, perhaps her dearest, despite him being a total prick most of the time. However, no matter how dear he might have been, Eleanor didn't want to give him the satisfaction of being able to completely figure her out.

"What are you thinking about?" Eleanor asked softly, eyes closed, facing the bright sun. Draco could tell by her rosy cheeks that she had probably been out here for too long, but something about her permanent blush made him happy she did.

"Trying to figure out what you are thinking about." Draco answered simply. "Every time I think I have you figured out, you go and surprise me again."

Eleanor chuckled and peeked at him from the corner of her eye. "That's kinda the point."

"You drive me mad." Draco sighed in frustration.

"You aren't exactly a walk in the park either, Draco Malfoy." Eleanor informed him.

"Meaning?" Draco scoffed.

"Meaning that I thought you would be overjoyed that I decided to live with you because you so wanted me to yesterday, then you argued with me about it. I don't know what you're deal is." Eleanor rolled her eyes at Draco, and stood up while brushing herself off. She walked towards the entrance of her home, she needed to pack a bag if she intended on staying with the Malfoys. A thought made her pause before entering the house, she looked back at Draco who remained unmoved in the garden.

"I know you wanted to kiss me earlier." She finally let out. Draco began to panic at her soft words, but made no move. He made sure not to tense a single muscle.

"You were drunk." Draco forced a chuckle out, worried as to where where this was going.

"Not that-"

"You were drunk, Eleanor." Draco snapped, losing his cool for a moment. His harsh tone caused Eleanor to jump a little, and hearing her full name out of his mouth set her teeth on edge. She understood why he was defensive. She knew he wanted to kiss her, and for a moment she had been open to the idea. That window of opportunity, that window of weakness was now shut completely.

"Yeah well, it doesn't matter. That would never happen between us anyway." Eleanor sniffed snottily. "We aren't like that. You know that better than anyone, Draco."

"Yeah." Draco returned shortly. He waited for the closing of the back door before clapping his hands to his face. How could he have let his defenses fall? How could he have been so stupid? How could he have let her see that?

* * *

Waiting on the other side of the fireplace was Narcissa and Lucius. Narcissa looked tearful and Lucius seemed classically stoic. Eleanor smiled at them as Draco set her bag inside the parlor.

"Hello sweetheart." Narcissa wrapped Eleanor in a great hug. She was usually avoidant of showing emotion, but her family was always her exception. And Eleanor had always been family.

"Hello." Eleanor said softly back, unwrapping herself from Narcissa's arms. Part of her was relieved to be around others and part of her resented herself for being there.

"We are so happy to have you here." Narcissa gushed.

"I'm glad I decided to come. I am just too tired to handle things on my own." Eleanor admitted lightly. Draco rolled his eyes at her kissing up to his parents. He was perturbed at her changing mind and mood swings. She wasn't usually this wishy-washy and he liked that about her.

"Draco, take Eleanor's things up to the guest room." Lucius snipped quietly at Draco.

"Can't one of the elves do it?" Draco asked defensively.

"We dismissed them for the evening, dear." Narcissa let out through gritted teeth. She was trying to remain smiling for Eleanor's sake.

"Why would you do that?" Draco scoffed.

"I know how Eleanor dislikes seeing them about the home, and we just wanted it to be us tonight. Forgive us for trying to make Eleanor comfortable." Narcissa shot back in a sickly sweet voice. Eleanor shrunk back in herself. Usually when Narcissa and Lucius made comments about their house elves, or seemed almost condescending when addressing the Cordarri's dislike for them, Eleanor and her parents would exchange looks in good humor. Her father would have cracked a double edged joke about how a truly upstanding family has the ability to take care of their own home. Lucius would flare his nostrils slightly at his friend, but both would end up chuckling as Olga changed the subject to current events within their circle, or how much Draco had grown.

In the aftermath of that moment, every person in the Malfoy foyer felt the absence of Olga and Darius.

Draco knew better than to disobey his parents, and he feared the wrath of his father if he had to be asked twice, but when he saw the emptiness in Eleanor's eyes he felt he could not leave her. Not for a moment. He saw her thinking and reflecting about all of the times she had come through that fireplace with her parents by her side. She was missing them now, he could see her need for companionship. But he left anyway, taking her things upstairs. He set them in the room next to his. It wasn't the nicest guest room in Malfoy Manor, but it had the biggest window. Draco thought Eleanor would like that. Cordarri Castle was bright and airy and full of warmth. His home was nothing like that. It was cold and dark. It seemed the whole place was made of stone and the only inhabitants were statues and ghosts. He knew why Eleanor's parents wouldn't have wanted her to live there.

She was too bright and full of life to be stifled in a mausoleum like the one he lived in.

When Draco returned downstairs, he found his family in the dining room where Narcissa revealed that she had made the dinner herself. Draco almost laughed out loud at this. His mother had only ever stepped foot in the kitchen to get a glass of brandy or to yell at the house elves. Draco looked to Eleanor to see if she was also amused by this revelation, but he found nothing but extreme gratitude in her eyes.

"It smells lovely, Narcissa." Eleanor smiled.

"You kids sit, Lucius and I will go grab the food." Narcissa was filled with pride at Eleanor's words as the couple left the room.

The Malfoy table had enough seats to fit 16 comfortably. It was always that size unless that had a particularly large crowd coming, in which case, they stretched it to fit their grand, neverending dining room. Lucius always sat at the end of the table, with Draco at his right and Darius on his left. Narcissa sat next to Draco, and Eleanor sat across from her, with her mother on her left. So it came as second nature to Eleanor and Draco to assume their normal seats.

"You're a liar." Draco chuckled in good humor at Eleanor.

"How so?"

"It smells lovely." Draco mimicked Eleanor's words in an exaggerated high, and squeaky voice.

"Shut up, Draco." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "It was so nice of her to do this. One of us has to at least pretend to be grateful."

"Well, you are their favorite child, so I will leave the brown nosing to you." Draco joked.

Eleanor opened her mouth to say something witty in return about how she didn't need to brown nose to be the favorite, but Narcissa and Lucius returned with servings of food floating about their heads before Eleanor could properly deliver her blow to Draco.

Eleanor smiled a little to herself as she watched the food be placed on the table, she grew excited to fill her plate, becoming aware of the pit in her stomach. Lucius took his seat at the head of the table and Narcissa took hers next to Draco.

Eleanor then realized how truly alone she was with the chairs on either side of her being left open for her parents. She pretended she didn't notice them as she moved Narcissa's food around on her plate, taking a few bites here and there. The Malfoys continued their chatter. Narcissa asked Lucius about his day at work, and he replied at length, not because he was particularly passionate about his work, or because he thought Narcissa truly wanted to hear about the details, but because he wouldn't be able to bear the silence and sadness that was beginning to radiate off of Eleanor.

Everyone was aware of the emptiness in those two seats. Eleanor wasn't sure why she didn't just get up and move to the seat closest to Lucius. They were just empty chairs. It didn't mean anything. But even if she had, she would still be on the opposite side of the table. She still didn't have her biggest supporters next to her. It was still the Malfoys plus one. It was still one family and their guest. She was still on her own side of the table, alone. It didn't matter how many chairs were on either side of her. She still didn't belong. She still didn't have a family. Eleanor sucked in a quiet breath. With her eyes on the table, she let the Malfoys talk about their days and be immersed in their lives with each other. She failed to realize that one Malfoy wasn't as immersed as she thought.

Draco pushed up from his chair, causing it to squeal loudly as it moved across the wooden floors. Eleanor jumped out of her skin when she heard that noise and Narcissa and Lucius stopped all conversation. All three looked at Draco in confusion as he held his dinner plate and in a few long strides took a seat beside Eleanor. Without a word of acknowledgment, the four continued eating. Narcissa and Lucius on one side of the table and Draco and Eleanor on the other.

* * *

The black velvet sky was covered with clouds that night. It felt so final to Eleanor, who searched for stars. She wanted some light beyond the darkness, some hope beyond the sadness.

"I thought you might like the window." Draco said from the doorway to Eleanor's room. He had stood watching her sit cross legged on the floor in front of the giant window for a moment too long and felt he needed to make his presence to her known somehow.

Eleanor didn't turn around. Her long, tangled, brown hair cascaded down her back. Draco recognized the jumper she was wearing as one belonging to her father. Draco felt a bit awkward at her lack of response. Perhaps she didn't hear him.

"Where do you think people go?" Eleanor asked lowly.

Draco supposed he should have expected a question of this weight with all that Eleanor was going through, but he was still surprised by it. He took this as an invitation to enter her room. He closed the door quietly behind him and sat beside her on the floor.

"I haven't much thought about it, I guess." Draco responded quietly, looking up at that same dark sky through the panes.

"Me neither. Not until now anyway." Eleanor sighed. "I want to think it is something better. But what if it isn't anything at all? What if all they are is flesh and bones, and now they are just-"

"Memories." Draco supplied before Eleanor could spiral into a worried descent into the decaying of her parents bodies. "I mean, if that is the worst case scenario, there being nothing, then they still live on in your memories and the stories you tell."

Eleanor took a deep breath and nodded, letting her head rest of Draco's shoulder. "What do you think is the best case scenario?"

"I don't know, El." Draco let out quietly. "I hope it is something that makes this all worth it."

"I hope so too." Eleanor agreed.

A silence fell between the two for a bit. Draco almost thought a few times that Eleanor had fallen asleep, but she never did. She stayed staring out that damned window that Draco had hoped would help her, but seemed to only be worrying her more.

"Why aren't you always like this?" Eleanor asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?" Draco returned, but he knew exactly what she meant.

"You care for people, Draco. You have a heart for others, and you never show it. You just act like a prick." Eleanor talked about this a lot to Draco. More than either would like to admit. It was a fight often had between the two. Eleanor wanted everyone to see the side of Draco that she saw. Cocky, a smartass, and the occasional prick, yes; but he still genuinely cared for others and Eleanor knew he would be less hated if he actually showed that.

"I care for _you_, El. Not people." Draco admitted quietly. It was something he had never said during the other times they had this discussion of his character. He was unsure if he should have said it, especially with the way he had been letting his guard down lately. But maybe this is what Eleanor needed. Maybe she needed him to be more vulnerable with her feeling so broken. Maybe this helped her.

Eleanor didn't respond, which annoyed Draco because he felt that him bearing his true feelings for once deserved some sort of response, but she never gave one. She stayed awake for a while after he said those words, but after putting it off for enough time, sleep found her. Draco stayed still for a few minutes after realizing that Eleanor had drifted off, but he eventually urged her up and helped her into her bed. He pulled the covers over her and turned to return to his room.

Half asleep, Eleanor grabbed his hand gently.

"Draco. I hate being alone. Stay." She groggily asked.

And he did.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay friends! **Here is another update for you all! We are moving forward a bit here through Eleanor's self discovery and growth after all she's been through! I'm always so incredibly excited to hear from you and see what you're thinking! I'm also hard at work editing, re-editing, and writing more to this story. It's going to be a long one, so prepare yourselves! I'm really just so stoked to be doing this and sharing something I've worked so hard for the past few years! Let me know what you think and how you're feeling about it!

* * *

The next few weeks went by in blurs. Narcissa was good to her word and planned the memorial service for the Cordarris. The celebration of life was completely packed. There was hardly and witch or wizard not in attendance. Eleanor didn't speak at the service, though Narcissa constantly reminded her how that didn't look good to the public. Eleanor took every sympathy from every guest in attendance with a sad heart and a blank face. Draco never left her side. When she was alone, she cried endlessly for her parents and grew angry at how none of the people who came to celebrate their life even knew them that well.

Eleanor would Floo home frequently. She kept up with her mother's garden, and would change out her clothes, and stare at the many pictures of her family that littered the walls of the castle. Eleanor didn't bother sorting through her parent's things. Their clothes could stay in the closet forever, they were not bothering anyone.

Eleanor was sad, she was grieving, but she was growing still. She was moving through the grief process and coming upon acceptance. It was a shallow sort of acceptance. It was the kind of acceptance that meant she didn't cry every time she heard their names, but she also refused to look at the memories that had been delivered to her house. She stored them in a broom closet somewhere on the way to the basement. A hallway that she never went down. She would tell herself it was too soon and that she had her own memories to comfort her, rather than relying on theirs. It was a poor case, but it justified her chosen ignorance towards those saved pieces of her parents.

The thought of writing to Remus Lupin seldom crossed Eleanor's mind. It seemed like a chore that she was more than happy to put off. Eleanor was unsure if she would ever write to him. She wanted to wait for a sign, she felt she would know one if it crossed her path. She figured it would be a gentle prodding from her parents on the other side, wherever they were; Eleanor was still a little foggy on her beliefs about the whole "life after death" thing.

However, part way through August, Eleanor felt she got that sign - through Hermione. The two hadn't seen each other all summer. Eleanor felt guilty because she knew her best friend was giving her space to grieve and recover by not reaching out, but Eleanor was perfectly content to spend her lonely times with Draco during that hotter than ever summer. In private, Draco was a good friend. He hid his good heart very well, even in front of Eleanor, but for some reason, she felt at home around him. He was the only part of her childhood that hadn't been torn away from her, and that wasn't something she took lightly.

Eventually though, even her oldest friend could wear on her nerves and patience, so Eleanor sent a hasty letter to Hermione, begging for tea at a Diagon Alley shop. Hermione was quick with a response and the two set up a day to meet.

When the day finally arrived, Draco bothered Eleanor endlessly. Trying to get her to stay.

"I haven't seen her all summer, Draco." Eleanor growled at her suddenly clingy friend as she searched the room she had been staying in for matching shoes and a purse with galleons in it.

"Okay but you spend the entire school year with her. You know we hardly see each other at Hogwarts." Draco pestered. He had never been this insistent before. Eleanor knew it was only his dislike for Hermione that drove him to argue against Eleanor seeing her.

"I'm not just going to sit around here waiting for you to get back from Blaise Zabini's house. You're always drunk when you come home anyway. Have you ever considered that maybe that isn't my favorite activity? Sitting alone while you drink with friends and waiting to cover for you in the evenings?" Eleanor rolled her blue eyes at Draco, who scoffed at her statement. Blaise's parents were away on holiday for almost the entire summer; they made it seem like it was a work related trip so that Blaise wouldn't have to travel with them. Eleanor had a sneaking suspicion that Lucius was also on a non-business "business" trip for the entire summer to escape Eleanor and the memories she brought into his home. With a whole estate to himself, Blaise had friends over almost every day to drink and play Quidditch and lay out by his pool. Eleanor had never been invited, but Draco always was. And even though he was welcome to stay at the Zabini's, he would always stumble through the Floo, drunk and wanting to see Eleanor. He felt he had some sort of obligation to her, so he would always come home to her and entertain her with his drunk musings.

"Don't pretend like you take care of me, Eleanor. You're nearly always as drunk as I am when I get home." Oh, yes. There was the little drinking habit that Eleanor had picked up over the past few weeks. She decided to sweep that under the rug.

"Not drunk, Draco. A glass of wine a night is supposed to be good for you." Eleanor sniffed.

"Then having five or six a night must really be doing you wonders." Draco shot back. "Blaise is having a big group over tonight, he said you were invited. You aren't really going to miss out, are you?" Draco tried a new tactic. She hadn't really been invited, but she grew up with these people, how bad could it be if she slipped in? Draco was trying to reason with himself.

"This evening?" Eleanor raised a brow, surprised that she had been invited to any Zabini event. "A big summer blowout?"

"No, no. A few more weeks until that. But tonight is a 'waterside meteor shower witness' or so Blaise calls it." Draco was getting excited that he was luring her away from Hermione. He liked being able to pretend that Eleanor was a Slytherin, even if only for the summers.

"That sounds like an elaborate way of saying 'getting drunk and jumping in the pool at night'." Eleanor laughed. "Count me in."

Draco smiled widely. "Perfect." He was feeling proud at his small victory over Granger, but was admittedly confused when Eleanor continued towards the fireplace.

"You're still seeing Granger?" Draco asked. "But-"

"It's noon, Draco. We will be done with tea by the time the meteors start falling, I can assure you." Eleanor chuckled as she Floo'd to meet her friend.

* * *

Conversation with Hermione was easier than Eleanor remembered. After a summer of playing a dance of words every time she spoke to Draco, letting her guard down and laughing without care with her best friend felt very freeing.

"I might look into getting a dog." Eleanor said after talking seemingly nonstop for an hour or so. "A little companionship would be nice." Eleanor didn't seem sad when she said this. She didn't feel sad - no more sad than her usual, baseline of anguish that she had grown accustomed to. "Although I can't imagine the Malfoy's taking the pup for the months I'm at school."

"The Weasley's might." Hermione suggested helpfully.

"No, no. I couldn't burden them with that. Molly has plenty of lives to worry about already." Eleanor smiled.

"It must be lonely, in that big house." Hermione said sympathetically, hoping that Eleanor might talk about her feelings a little more. Hermione had been mulling over words to say to her all summer, and Eleanor hadn't given her the slightest opportunity to say them.

"I'm not there too much." Eleanor shrugged. "I tend to my mother's garden, use her kitchen from time to time, gather more clothes."

"Oh, I didn't realize…" Hermione trailed off. "You were so insistent on staying there when we parted ways."

"I was all nerve and no practicality. The Malfoys aren't always the best company, but they are a rare part of my childhood that hasn't been taken away. They have been very helpful."

"I was beginning to wonder why you didn't want me to visit." Hermione stated. "You've been seeing a lot of Draco, then?" She tried her best to keep contempt for the youngest Malfoy out of her voice for the sake of her friend, but some still managed to slip through. Eleanor tried to ignore it, but her heart had been so full of Draco over the summer that certain tones were harder for her to ignore than they were before.

"Yeah," Eleanor wanted to elaborate on how wonderful and kind Draco could be, and had been but decided to keep those things to herself. "How are your parents doing?" Eleanor changed subjects from Draco.

"Alright, I suppose. I haven't seen them in a while." Hermione shrugged. She missed her parents, but didn't want to say so in front of Eleanor, who had a far greater reason to miss her mother and father.

"Have you been staying with the Weasleys?" Eleanor inquired. It was unlike Hermione to be away from her parents for too long.

Hermione clapped her hand to her head. "Oh, I'm so daft." She let out in regret. "I wasn't supposed to say anything."

"About what?" Eleanor asked, realizing she was being nosey, but not being able to stop herself.

"I suppose Dumbledore just wanted us to keep it from Harry," Hermione reasoned with herself quickly. She looked around her to make sure no one near the pair was listening in. "There is an organization rising, after everything that has happened." Hermione explained vaguely, afraid of getting caught. "I would love to tell you more about it, perhaps in a more private setting."

The girls moved their two person event to Eleanor's home. Hermione was quietly impressed by how bright and open the home still looked. She was sure the last thing Eleanor wanted was for her home to become a graveyard.

"So, this organization?" Eleanor asked, leading her friend to the kitchen and pouring her some water.

"The Order of the Phoenix." Hermione spilled quickly, excited to have her favorite confidant back. "It was started during the first war, and it getting brought back again. "

"There is going to be a war?" Eleanor asked dumbfounded, her heart constricting in fear, thinking of only the Malfoys, worried they would choose the wrong side again.

Hermione squeezed Eleanor's hand, recognizing the fear and smart enough to realize where her mind immediately went. "We don't know yet, but we need to be prepared. Voldemort is back and he is getting stronger by the day."

Eleanor nodded, trying to keep tears of fear out of her eyes. Did Voldemort's return have anything to do with her parents death? Or the fact that somehow every test ran on their bodies came up with no cause of death? Narcissa and Lucius were loyal to Voldemort before, did the 14 years of friendship with Olga and Darius change their hearts enough to remain neutral? What was Draco going to do? Eleanor's mind was swimming, drowning. A war? How many more deaths would she have to endure?

"Eleanor." Hermione brought her friend back. "You will be protected. Don't worry."

Eleanor didn't want to voice that she wasn't worried about herself, but she felt that Hermione knew. "Who is all apart of it?"

"The Weasleys, the real Mad Eye Moody, a few Aurors from the Ministry, Dumbledore, Snape, Sirius Black, we are using his home as headquarters, that's where me and the Weasleys have been staying. Oh, do you remember Professor Lupin? He is apart of it too."

Eleanor's heart stopped at that name. Hermione kept talking but Eleanor's ears felt like they went fuzzy. Her biological father, Eleanor had easy access to him. Hermione saw him every day. Was this her sign? Was this the universe's way of telling her to talk to him?

"You said Remus Lupin was there?" Eleanor interrupted her friend, Hermione's brows braided together in confusion.

"Yes, he is." She confirmed.

Eleanor wasn't thinking, she wasn't prepared to see him but she figured that if she got the gut feeling, she should follow it.

"Can I go see him?" Eleanor spilled out, her mind spinning. She was screaming at herself internally. She wasn't ready, she didn't know what she was going to say to him.

"Lupin?" Hermione asked for clarification.

"Uh, yeah." Eleanor began to wring her hands together in nervousness. "It's been awhile since I have seen him. He was my favorite professor."

"The Weasleys are there too." Hermione reminded.

"Oh, yes. And the Weasleys." Eleanor gathered up her things. "I can't stay long, I am going over to Blaise Zabini's with Draco tonight. Some sort of meteor shower watch party." Eleanor forced herself to chuckle and roll her eyes so she didn't seem so on edge, but Hermione could see right through her.

"Is everything alright?" Hermione asked as the pair walked towards the fireplace.

"Peachy." Eleanor nodded once, allowing Hermione to Floo the two of them there.

The Order headquarters was cramped. Eleanor could already tell. The kitchen had random articles of clothing, dishes stacked and shoes piled. It seemed to be where everyone left their jackets. She was sure Molly was having a fit about it.

Eleanor felt light headed. Voices of various Weasley siblings were muffled. She was vaguely aware of her hands shaking uneasily. She wished Draco was there. For some reason he calmed her heart even though he often frustrated her mind.

"Remus?" Hermione called through the dark, cramped home.

"What do ya need, love?" A distantly familiar voice called from the parlor. Hermione led Eleanor into another dark room. Sirius Black lounged lazily on the couch. He was cleaner, and better dressed than the last time Eleanor saw him. Her interaction with him was short and panic filled. Sirius' eyes filled with regret when he looked at her, he remembered knocking Eleanor roughly to the ground when he lunged for Peter Pettigrew - who was under his Scabbers alias at the time - the fall had broken a few bones in Eleanor's shoulder and gave her a bit of a concussion. Nothing Madam Pomfrey couldn't fix in a jiffy but still something Sirius felt guilty about.

Eleanor knew Sirius was innocent and Harry's beloved godfather, but it was still a bit of a shock to see him after spending the majority of her life believing him to be a murderer.

"Where's Remus?" Hermione asked. "Eleanor wanted to see him."

Sirius raised his eyebrows at Eleanor. "Favorite professor?" He inquired. Eleanor nodded once. "He's in the loo. Be out in a minute. I do want to offer my deepest sympathies about your parents. I was a few years behind them in school, but they were wonderful people, I heard nothing but great things. Loss is the world's cruelest trick." Sirius smiled sadly.

"Thank you." Eleanor said softly, not wanting to talk about her parents. Sirius nodded once as the knob on the door off the parlor jiggled.

Seeing Remus shocked Eleanor more than she thought it would. But it was nothing compared to Remus seeing his daughter. For a moment Remus thought it was her, Eleanor's mother. She looked so similar to her. Her brown, wavy hair that framed her round cheeks. All that was missing was a smile, but Remus couldn't expect her to be smiling now.

"Miss Cordarri. What a surprise." Remus managed to squeeze out, his throat was constricting with nerves. He had missed Eleanor more than anyone could imagine.

"Could we talk?" Eleanor asked in a tight voice. Hermione was exhibiting her extreme confusion with her facial expressions, but didn't question anything as she exited the room with Sirius.

Once the room was empty and silent, Eleanor felt like somehow the air was heavier, like she couldn't speak.

"I'm so sorry about your parents." Remus finally offered, his eyes were glued to her and her eyes were glued to her shoes. Eleanor didn't respond. Her heart was loud in her ears. Why did she come? This was a mistake. She wasn't ready for this.

"I imagine this must be extremely confusing and hard to process." Remus nervously tried to fill the silence. "Grief is-"

"Who else knows?" Eleanor asked suddenly, she quickly realized how rude she sounded. "I mean, ah - I'm sorry." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "I decided to drop in so last minute, I hadn't really prepared myself." She tried to recover.

"It's quite alright, truly." Remus comforted, putting an unsure hand on Eleanor's shoulder, and guiding her to sit down. Had the situation not been so tense and emotional, he could have laughed at her nerve-induced lack of tact; something he recalled exhibiting when we was giving her up to Darius and Olga. "I can only imagine what you must be feeling." He sucked in a deep breath. "Sirius is the only other one who knows. Harry's parents knew as well. I've kept it rather hush otherwise."

"I wanted to tell you that I know. And I do want a relationship with you, Professor Lupin." Eleanor said quietly, calming her breathing now and braving a look into eyes identical to hers. He wasn't home, but he was still a comfort that Eleanor was ready to begin accepting.

"Call me Remus, please." He smiled at her. He knew better than to ask her to call him 'dad'.

"Remus." Eleanor nodded, trying to calm herself. "I'm sorry I just popped in. I should have written. It's just that I have been putting off contacting you all summer and when Hermione told me you were here - I don't know, it sounds silly, but it felt like a sign. So I just came here without thinking."

"Can I take you to dinner sometime?" Remus asked, a slight smile on his face. "A way for us to get better acquainted in a casual setting that we are both prepared for."

Eleanor looked at Remus, kind Remus, who was trying his best to make this easy on Eleanor. She was so grateful and for a moment, truly happy. It was fleeting when she remembered all that she had lost, but Remus wasn't a negative in her life. "I would really like that."

"How is the day after tomorrow looking for you?" He asked pleasantly.

"I'll squeeze you in." Remus was afraid she was being serious and that he was burdening her, but he quickly caught her mischievous, twinkling eyes and her upturned corners of her mouth and realized she was cracking a joke.

"We can meet in Diagon Alley, perhaps around 6?" Remus suggested.

Eleanor was truly excited. No qualifications. She was genuinely looking forward to that day.

* * *

"That sure took longer than you said." Draco huffed as soon as Eleanor exited the fireplace.

"Sorry, I had to go to my house and get a few things for tonight." Eleanor rolled her eyes at Draco's impatience.

"Get what?" Draco asked, pushing off the wall he had been leaning on and followed Eleanor as she bounded up the stairs to the room she had been staying in.

"Swim suit, extra clothes." Eleanor shrugged, then pulled a bottle of champagne and a bottle of expensive, clear liquor from her bag. "Also this because I felt like I couldn't show up empty handed." She smiled mischievously at Draco. There was a glimmer in her eye that Draco hadn't seen the whole summer. She was ready to have fun. His heart sped off, she was almost back to her normal self, and she wanted to get drunk and be careless with Draco like she used to.

"Well stocked." Draco commented with a smirk, looking at the bottle in her hands. "This stuff is top notch." He realized the moment he said it that it belonged to her father. The Cordarri alcohol cellar was vast, almost overflowing. Eleanor was set for life, but he wondered what kind of emotional toil she went through to bring herself to take her father's unopened bottles of prize liquor to a party thrown by someone so distant from her.

But Eleanor simply shrugged as if it was no care to her. "I wouldn't know, I just grabbed the first bottles I could find in the cellar."

"What happened to you?" Draco asked with a laugh, wrapping the bottles in a towel and putting them back into her bag before his mother came up to the room to be nosy.

"I don't know." Eleanor rubbed her neck uncomfortably, she didn't like keeping things from Draco, but Remus and the Order were her secret for now. She was reminded that afternoon that she had people, she didn't have the people she wanted most, but she had people who were there for her. She wasn't as alone as she thought. "It's been awhile since I have had a truly good time." She smiled at Draco a bit. "I'm ready to have fun."

"Okay," Draco nodded, smiling "let's go have some fun."


	8. Chapter 8

**Quick Note: **I'm really loving all of the support and feedback on this story! Thank you so so much to everyone following, favoriting, and reviewing! It really makes my day and makes me so excited to keep sharing! So just kind of a layout of how this story is heading, for the first half-ish it's really going to focus on relationship building and hardships before the gang heads into the Second War, so if it seems really relationship heavy in the beginning, that's just because we need some solid friendships and relationships before it all hits the fan in the last two years of school! It's going to diverge from canon a fair amount a little further down the road, but not take away from the story and themes of the actual series! I just want to be upfront about what's going to be going down without giving tooooo much away ;)

Also, I do not condone or support underage drinking, but that's about to happen...

Let me know what you think!

* * *

It was a fairly small group, Eleanor soon realized. About 25 people, most of whom were Slytherin, although there were a few stray Ravenclaws about. Eleanor knew everyone, but couldn't call most of them friends. She was immediately uncomfortable.

"I shouldn't be here." She whispered to Draco as they wove through the small crowd to find Blaise.

"Shove it, you grew up with these people." Draco shrugged off.

"Yeah, but that was a long time ago. I'm the enemy now, remember?" Eleanor pointed out, desperately wishing she hadn't blown off Hermione and the Weasleys for these people, and growing more bitter by the second that Draco didn't get along with her Gryffindor friends.

Draco simply laughed at her comment. "Well, traitor, you're safe behind enemy lines. You're with me. I want you here, so you will be here."

Eleanor smirked at him. "I have a hard time believing you are that influential." She rolled her eyes.

"Oh Ellie," Draco mused with humor in his voice, "How quickly you forget."

Eleanor was about to shoot something back when her and Draco reached Blaise. He seemed happy to see Eleanor, a surprise for her.

"Eleanor! It's been a while. How are you doing?" He asked. He was always kind to Eleanor, even when Draco's other friends were not. She hoped that with all the time Draco had been spending with Blaise, some kindness and tolerance would rub off on him.

"I'm doing alright." Eleanor nodded, and she wasn't lying. "Thank you for inviting me."

"Of course! Figured you were about to go mad being stuck with this prick all summer." Blaise joked good naturedly. Eleanor joined in the laughter at Draco's expense.

"Absolutely bonkers, actually." Eleanor chuckled some more. Draco was happy to see her smile but was feeling more and more humiliated watching his two best friends bond over their annoyances with him. Eleanor noticed the defensive anger building behind Draco's eyes and laid a gentle hand on his forearm, which comforted him more than he cared to admit. "I joke, obviously. Draco has been keeping me company this summer, and I am grateful for it." She spared a genuine smile in his direction.

"Oh, keeping you company." Theodore Nott burst into the conversation with a suggestive wiggle of his brows. Eleanor's ears got hot at the tips, but other than that remained calm. "Say, Malfoy, is she a lioness in every sense? I've been dying to know."

Draco's eyes seemed to turn black and anger flashed through him, his fist was curled and he lunged towards Theo in a fit of rage. Unbeknownst to Eleanor, Draco had been hearing comments like this about her all summer. It was why he always wanted to come home to her, he listened to people be disrespectful to her, and he couldn't defend her without making it seem like he was defending Potter and his buddies as well. He always felt guilty for not sticking up for her, and he found solace in being able to hug her to try to make up for it. Those comments had seldom crossed a sexual line, and Draco thought his friends had enough tact to not say anything in front of her.

Eleanor reached her arm out quickly and pulled Draco back. They hadn't even been there five minutes, she didn't want to see the start of a fight. "Blaise, I brought drinks, any place I can put them?" She asked quickly, still holding Draco firmly by the arm.

"Kitchen." Blaise said shortly, glaring at Nott.

"Draco, could you show me where that is?" Eleanor urged, pulling him away from Blaise and Theo.

Draco was seething as the two walked through the house to get to the kitchen. Eleanor quickly realized her drinks were not needed, as the entire table was full of bottles of alcohol for the night. She started to slowly unwrap the liquor from the towel as Draco leaned against the wall.

"I should have hit him." He muttered lowly.

"No, you shouldn't have." Eleanor retorted.

"Eleanor, did you hear-" Draco started to yell in disbelief. Eleanor spun around quickly and shot him a look that stopped him mid sentence..

"Of course I heard, Draco." Eleanor said sharply. "Obviously I don't love it when I hear things like that, but I have had much worse things happen to me than having a drunk Theodore Nott make a halfway sexual pass at me. You are daft for wanting to hit him, one of your best friends, for something he said when he was drunk at a party." Draco blinked at her for a moment, unsure of what to say. "Grow up, Draco."

"Why are you so angry, Eleanor?" Draco accused in an upset voice. "I was trying to defend your honor."

"My honor?" Eleanor repeated, astounded by how incredibly dumb Draco was being and set off now that he was consistently using her full name, his tell that he was angry with her. "Draco, I don't care what these people think about me or about what I do. These are your friends, I'm just here to have a good time. If you punched Theodore Nott in the face over some dumb thing he said to a girl that doesn't even matter, your life would have gotten rather difficult and the fun of the evening would have been over. Be the bigger person for one goddamn time in your life, Draco. And for fucks sake, stop arguing with me over everything."

"A girl who doesn't matter?" Draco repeated, suddenly very quiet. His blue eyes bore into Eleanor, who now felt more than a little uncomfortable and confused by Draco's change in tone. She shifted on her feet, and turned away from Draco to begin making a drink for herself. Draco pushed off the wall and walked over to Eleanor and grabbed her busy hands in his, forcing her to look at him. "You think you don't mean anything to me?"

Eleanor gulped for a moment. She knew she didn't mean as much to Draco as he did to her. Sometimes she questioned this knowledge when the two of them were alone, but the problem was, they were seldom alone in normal life. At school, it was like they barely knew each other. They were distant, and it wasn't Eleanor's choice to be that way. She felt that she obviously couldn't mean that much to him if he shut her out from September to June. "I don't want to get into this right now, Draco." Eleanor warned cautiously, wedging her hand out of his grasp.

"I do." Draco persisted. Eleanor searched his eyes, at a loss of what to say. She knew this wasn't the time or place to bring up four years worth of frustrations about their friendship added with confusions that this summer brought about. She had been doing a relatively good job at ignoring their obvious growing attraction for each other, but when Draco was making her face it, she wanted nothing more than to shut down. She didn't want to face it, and she wasn't going to. Draco opened his mouth to start saying something when Blaise walked through the kitchen doors.

"Sorry about that. Nott's been drinking all day, he's being a total prick. I hope you both are okay." He said kindly. Eleanor took a step back from Draco and smiled widely at Blaise.

"I'm fine. Draco is a bit overprotective as of late. Truly, no hard feelings, just trying to get a drink." Draco was shocked at how unbothered she sounded. "What are you drinking, Draco?"

Draco was annoyed now. She was acting so casual right as they were about to talk about something so serious. She was good at doing that. She didn't face her problems, or solve them, she just avoided them until they became impossible to ignore. "Not really in the mood, thanks." Draco said shortly. Eleanor's eyes narrowed at him.

"Fine. If you're not drinking, I will have to get drunk enough for the both of us." Eleanor shrugged. Draco knew his mistake then. He knew Eleanor would be good on her word. She took three large shots in succession as Draco watched in annoyance and Blaise in admiration.

"Gryffindors may be insufferable, but they apparently taught you how to party." Blaise commented, impressed.

"Being friends with the Weasley twins has those perks." Eleanor chuckled.

"Don't tell me the Weasleys throw the best parties." Blaise laughed. "The Weasleys?"

Eleanor nodded. "Molly would have an absolute fit. They have an induction during fourth year for all of us. Bit ridiculous really. The tournament this year didn't help, lots of parties. Fred and George took it upon themselves to get us absolutely shitfaced as a "welcome to almost adulthood" ceremony." Eleanor smiled fondly at the memory.

"Even Granger?" Blaise inquired.

"Even sweet 'Mione." Eleanor confirmed. "How do you think she doesn't snap like a rubber band?"

"Merlin, what I would give to see you lot drunk." Blaise shook his head. Draco watched the whole interchange with great dismay.

"Maybe you all shouldn't be such judge-y, pricks all the time and we'd hang out with you." Eleanor suggested. "Just a thought."

Draco smiled to himself, hoping Eleanor would say something just tactless enough to get Blaise annoyed with her and for him to use it as a reason to take her home. But he should have known that he was not the only one to see Eleanor's charm. Blaise laughed with her as she took a bottle of a fruity drink off the table. Draco paled, those were her favorites. She could drink those all night. He hated that he apparently wasn't the only one who knew that, that the Weasley twins and fucking Potter knew that too. He hated that he had no idea how wild the Gryffindor common room could get. He figured she would have always come to him when he was drunk. Did she even think about him? She was the first thing on his mind when he was a few drinks in. Even when he wasn't a few drinks in.

Draco held a growl of frustration in his throat. He hated being weak, he hated how she made him different. She made his heart soft, she made him into some kind of loser with no backbone. He would have done anything for her. He felt like he was losing his mind, losing his edge. It was so easy to ignore her when they lived in opposite sides of Hogwarts castle but ever since she called for him that fateful night of her parents' death she has been intertwined constantly in his life. Always there. Always warping him, and she doesn't even realize. It's why he left to Blaise's so often. He needed an hour or two to become who he really was again, to regain his strength. To not see her for a goddamn minute.

But he missed her when he was gone. He wanted to be around her. She filled him with something, and he would never admit it. He was so confused and amazed and overwhelmed by her.

"You brought a suit, right El?" Blaise asked. Draco felt a fire go through him. He almost lunged forward to punch Blaise right there, but just clenched his fists instead. No one else had ever called her that. Or maybe they did, and he just didn't know. That was a terrible thought, he tried to push out the voice of Potter or any one of the Weasleys calling her 'El'. Finally, Draco cracked and reached behind Eleanor and grabbed a bottle off of the table and poured a tall glass and began to drink from it as though it were water. Eleanor's eyes were narrowed as him once he returned the bottle.

"In the mood now?" She questioned.

"Apparently. Just felt the need to drink." Draco shrugged. "Do you have your suit, _El?_" Draco repeated Blaise's words with malice dripping from his voice as he held eye contact with Eleanor, who simply glared at Draco for acting this way.

"Yup." Eleanor popped the 'p', nodding once with a sickly sweet smile.

"Uh, alright, well the two of you are free to join us at the pool whenever you're ready." Blaise nodded, hating the tension in the room and making his way to the exit.

"Why are you acting like this?" Eleanor hissed at Draco once they were alone again.

"Like what?" Draco demanded.

"I don't know, Draco. You are confusing me." Eleanor shook her head, her thoughts were beginning to swirl a bit.

"How? What is confusing?" Draco asked, continuing to drink from his glass.

"You act like you care so deeply about me, and I love that. I am so grateful for you and how you act around me, even though you are a real bastard sometimes-"

"So what's the problem?" Draco questioned. "You act as though my being your friend is some grand inconvenience to you, like I don't mean it when I say that I care about you. Is that so hard for you to believe? Do you think so little of me-"

"You don't mean it, Draco." Eleanor shouted out. "You don't mean it at all, because when we get on the Hogwarts Express in three weeks, I'm not going to hear from you. You will study in the library with me if we hide behind bookshelves and you will acknowledge me in Hogsmeade if I'm not with my friends, you won't sneer at me as much as you do Ron, or Harry, or Hermione. Am I supposed to believe that is you showing that you care about me? Going from spending everyday together, being inseparable, to being nothing?"

"What do you want me to do, Eleanor? Reverse years of hatred for your friends? We run in different circles, we are in different houses, we have different lives."

"And yet here I am!" Eleanor yelled, waving her hands about, spilling her pink drink on her white shirt. She cursed for a moment then turned back to Draco. "I'm here in Blaise Zabini's mansion, surrounded by your housemates, your school chums because for me, spending time with you is more important than house pride, or whatever fucking high horse you sit on." Eleanor's eyes began to fill with tears. "You became my best friend again this summer, Draco. I know I haven't been much fun, or really even that pleasant to be around most of the time, but despite all my losses, I felt that I finally got you back. But I'm frustrated because I know that once we go back to school, it's over." Draco looked at her, dumbfounded. He didn't realize that she was under the impression the pair hadn't been best friends before this summer. He always thought of her as his number one and favorite person. He realized that he didn't make that as obvious as he should have.

"El-" He started quietly.

"Then this summer, while getting on the right track back to friendship, you start acting flirty and like you want to be with me, and Draco, I want to be with you, I do, but I can't deal with all of the uncertainty of whether or not you will be there for me at Hogwarts. Will you want to be seen around me? Would you want to be dating a Gryffindor? A friend of Harry Potter's? Does all of this end once we get on the train? Does your fondness rely solely on proximity? I feel like I am going to be made an absolute fool of for having these feelings." Eleanor just let the words spill out of her mouth, her alcohol and three months of repressed feelings catching up to her.

"I didn't realize that you felt like I was abandoning you." Draco admitted. "I thought it was mutual."

Eleanor shook her head. "I miss you, so much, Draco. I would love for us all to get along and be neutral acquaintances if you all cannot manage friendship."

"That's a lovely thought, El, but sometimes you can't just make everyone be friends simply because you want them to." Draco responded.

"I'm trying." Eleanor pleaded with him. "I'm open and friendly with your friends."

"You're different. No one can dislike you, you are an unarguably wonderful person to be around. The same can't be said for your friends." Draco tried to joke, but Eleanor wasn't in the mood.

Eleanor nodded sadly, realizing Draco wasn't going to change his mind. No matter what he said, he was still going to be a different person at school, she was still going to be left in the dust. She turned to leave, to join Blaise and the rest at the pool. She took a big gulp from her drink and was able to drain it, so she grabbed another. She was feeling a bit light on her feet at that point, her head was a little spinny, and she was exhausted from her talk with Draco that all she wanted to do was joke and swim around.

"Wait, aren't we going to talk about the other stuff?" Draco asked. "You want to be with me."

Eleanor smiled sadly at him a little. "I do. But there is no point in talking about it, because in a few weeks everything will be different, everything will go back to the way it was. This summer meant a lot to me, and whether or not it meant the same to you is beyond me, but it won't mean enough for you to care this deeply about me come September first. There's nothing more I can do, Draco, except enjoy these last few weeks."

Draco took a step forward. He heard her, he knew where she was coming from, he would do better, he would have to, because she wanted him the way he had been secretly wanting her for months, if not his entire life. He took her face in his hands and leaned down, their mouth inches apart. He had to do it, his entire being felt like he was floating away, and she was keeping him rooted to this one spot.

"Don't." Eleanor said, pulling her head away. "Don't do this because you think it's what I want." She wanted him to kiss her; she wanted it very badly. She had wanted him to since the first time he tried at the beginning of the summer, but she wouldn't be able to cope with tasting him, then having him leave her behind.

"I want to." Draco insisted.

"You want to now. It will change." Eleanor's blue eyes were wide and looking at him with sadness and acceptance that it wasn't going to end up the way she hoped.

"It won't." Draco wanted to tell her that his feelings for her hadn't changed for as long as he could remember, he didn't know why he kept that bit of information to himself. "If there is one thing I know, it's that I'm going to want to kiss as much as I do now next month, and the month after that, and on and on." Draco tried to assure, he didn't know what he needed to say.

"You're going to make a fool out of me." Eleanor decided with finality and listened to what her heart felt rather than what her head told her. She closed the gap between the two of them and softly kissed Draco.


	9. Chapter 9

When Eleanor finally pulled away from Draco's lips she didn't know what to say. She could only stare at him. It felt like a release of all of their cultivated tensions over the summer. It was as though something clicked and they both felt a similar sense of "oh, we should have done this awhile ago…"

The pair looked at each other for a few moments, expressionless and silent. Eleanor was finally the one to break the silence by starting to giggle and leaning her forehead on Draco's chest. Draco was confused at first. He couldn't figure out why she was laughing, was he not a good kisser? How was she supposed to know, he was her first kiss. Wasn't he? Draco's brows furrowed, suddenly very jealous that Eleanor might have kissed someone else. He was happy for a few moments that he had gotten exactly what he wanted - and arguably what he needed - but thinking that someone else might have kissed her sent fiery tremors through him.

"What's so funny?" Draco asked, careful not to sound angry.

"We've been wasting a lot of time not doing that, haven't we?" Eleanor chuckled lightly. Draco's shoulders relaxed at her words. She liked it. She liked him.

"I suppose we have been."

Eleanor was still considerably anxious about the coming school year. It was a good kiss, but not good enough to give Draco reason to leave behind his old, easy habits. It could even be argued that she was more anxious now because she had a bit more to lose.

The pair fell quiet. An awkward aura hung about them. Draco growing more jealous by the moment at the thought of other boys kissing her, and Eleanor growing more worried that she had just made things more complicated. Eleanor peeled her hands from Draco's. She took a long sip of her drink. She was starting to feel the alcohol crawling along inside her body. She was beginning to feel a bit warm and her mind started going fuzzy around the edges.

"Shall we join the rest of the party?" Eleanor asked, not looking at Draco, her nerves building. She was afraid she might cry at the thought of experiencing this moment with him, knowing full well that during the school year, he would be only a memory to her. Draco was hurt by her question. He realized she didn't want to spend time with him. His first reaction was to get angry, but he struggled to keep his temper under control as he offered a stiff nod and led her out of the kitchen and to the pool.

"Eleanor!" A girl's voice yelled from the pool. Both Eleanor and Draco looked over to see Jenny Smith, a 6th year Ravenclaw that Eleanor had befriended from a study group. Jenny was obviously very intoxicated. Her bikini top was very lopsided and dangerously close to be showing something that would have otherwise been blurred out. She was giggling madly with a group of Ravenclaw and Slytherin girls, most of whom Eleanor recognized, but had never spoken with. "Eleanor, come join us!" She invited.

Eleanor looked unsurely at Draco for a moment. He didn't want her to go, he had brought her here, but Blaise called Draco in a different direction, so the two parted with equal feelings of uncertainty involving the other. Draco watched Eleanor out of the corner of his eye as she peeled off her alcohol stained shirt and slipped off her shorts. She stepped in the pool and made her way over to the group of squawking girls.

"Everything alright with El, mate?" Blaise asked quietly.

"Yeah, everything is great." Draco said shortly. "I would really appreciate it if you didn't call her that though. It's starting to get on my nerves."

"Sorry. It's just you call her that, I thought she preferred it." Blaise quickly apologized.

"She does." Draco snapped. "From me."

Blaise nodded once. "Won't happen again." He assured. He was confused by his friend to say the least. Blaise had never seen Draco outwardly care about anyone. Draco had his own way of expressing friendship, which often involved intimidation of people who crossed his friends, less cutting insults, access to his knowledge, booze and connections when any were needed. Eleanor was the only person whom Draco expressed any emotions over, though that emotion was almost always anger at someone who spoke ill of her and not so much a fondness of her as a person, but it was still an emotion not often seen. Blaise wasn't stupid, he knew Draco had feelings for Eleanor and he wasn't sure if Draco wanted to talk about it. He was sure he would want to, no one faired well with bottled up emotions, but Draco was not one to express feelings.

Blaise was always suspicious of the way Draco protected Eleanor, and how he would leave her out of tirades about Potter and his friends. However, his interest was truly piqued at the Cordarri's memorial service. All of Draco's friends were there, every important wizarding family was in attendance. While it wasn't the setting to catch up with friends, the way Draco clung to Eleanor and didn't even talk to any of his housemates was very out of character for him. Blaise would see small gestures, a small pat on the back, a rub of the back of her hand with his finger. Small, subtle, gentle. All very un-Draco. Blaise tried not to be nosy, but he liked knowing things about others, especially his friends, but he also knew where Draco's boundaries were, and Blaise had a feeling he had been slowly crossing them that day and decided to put the whole conversation to bed. "Do you need another drink?" Blaise prodded, raising a brow at Draco's fixation on the pool. Draco nodded tersely, and took a cold mixed drink from his friend.

Eleanor seemed unbothered to everyone else. In reality, her mind was swimming and over analyzing.

"How've you been, Eleanor?" Jenny asked as Eleanor approached.

"As expected." Eleanor nodded, she noticed the mood shift quickly amidst the once partying girls and felt guilty for her grief. "But I'm doing a lot better lately." She nodded encouragingly, plastering a smile on her face.

"I think we would all benefit from a shot, don't you all agree?" Jenny quickly asked. The group of girls nodded and made their way out of the pool. Eleanor followed suit, determined to have a good time, and also to get very drunk.

The group was made up of seven girls. Jenny, Millicent Bulstrode, Marietta Edgecomb, Astoria and Daphne Greengrass, Pansy Parkinson, and Eleanor. As they were walking towards the outdoor bar, Eleanor fell in step with Marietta.

"Funny seeing you here." Eleanor joked with a half smile.

"I could say the same." Marietta commented. She was small and made Eleanor feel like a giant beside her. She suddenly got very aware of the way she looked in a bathing suit and was wondering why she cared so much as she looked around to all of the other girls who were trim and small. Eleanor wanted to cover her not so flat stomach and hide her thicker thighs. Would Draco still want her when he saw her in comparison to all of the girls who wouldn't cause him so many problems? She wasn't outstandingly pretty, or small. She was a Gryffindor who was emotionally unavailable, and as she just found out, she wasn't even a Pureblood. All of these things Eleanor thought she was okay with until she fucked up and let Draco kiss her. "Blaise invited me. We've got a bit of a thing these days, but we are keeping it very quiet. Like extremely. I would bet Draco doesn't even know. It's just you and Cho now." Marietta began giggling.

"Have you spoken to Cho a lot lately? How is she?" Eleanor inquired quietly as they reached the bar. Pansy began pouring the shots, and generously too.

"She loved Cedric, so it's been hard for her, but I think she is ready for school to start again. Feeling the itch to get out of her sadness cave, you know?"

"I do know." Eleanor nodded once.

"Oh yeah! Duh. You would know better than anyone." Marietta laughed a bit. Eleanor wasn't sure if she liked that comment, so she took her shot before Daphne Greengrass was able to count to three.

The night continued on like this. Eleanor didn't see Draco again for a while. Eleanor was adopted into this group of girls, and while they weren't really Eleanor's cup of tea, it was fun to get drunk with them. They sang loudly in the pool together and splashed around and joked for a good portion of the night. Eleanor got more comfortable and took more shots, and would grab bottles of her favorite fruity drink throughout. The night cooled down quickly, and the girls had to eventually get out of the pool. All thoroughly intoxicated. Many people had left by the time the girls were curled up on pool chairs in their towels. The seven of them were the only ones to remain. Blaise, Draco, Marcus Flint, Daniel Harper and Gregory Goyle were all inside trying to figure out a Muggle game that involved cups, drinks and a small ball. They had been out pestering the girls a while before, wanting them to play, however none of them seemed interested.

Eleanor had a large towel and was wrapped up in it completely, sitting beside the outdoor fireplace. Her world was spinning and everything was making her laugh, she also had the vague feeling that she might vomit, but forced herself to ignore that bit.

"Daphne, you can't be serious, that's disgusting." Jenny laughed loudly at the revelation that 15 year old Daphne had started sleeping with a 19 year old intern in her father's department at the ministry.

"It's not disgusting." Daphne defended. "He really likes me, and I really like him. It's real." All of the girls collectively rolled their eyes.

"It's not real, you're just easy; both to seduce and manipulate." Pansy said bluntly. Eleanor had discovered that her friendship with Hermione was nothing like the one that Pansy and Daphne shared, but they seemed happy just the same. Daphne gasped at her friend but laughed a little.

"Okay, maybe he is manipulating me, but no more than Crabbe is manipulating you and I can guarantee that I am enjoying getting manipulated far more than you are." Daphne argued. All of the girls laughed and Pansy turned a bit red.

"You are probably right on that front, Crabbe is no good." Pansy laughed loudly.

"I don't understand why you are still with him then." Millicent added in sourly. From what Eleanor could observe from that night, she had figured that Millie and Pansy used to be best friends, but when both Pansy and Daphne got paired with each other in Potions at the beginning of fourth year (mostly because Snape was annoyed with Millicent and Pansy's constant giggling), Millicent got shoved out of the friendship, but was trying desperately to claw back into it. And also, Millicent was in love with Crabbe, who Pansy was currently sleeping with. It all made Eleanor's head spin, but she got a good laugh from it.

"Better than not getting any, I suppose." Pansy laughed loudly again.

Jenny was rolling her eyes at the madness. She had been dating a Slytherin boy who was two years older than her since 4th year. He just graduated and was working on becoming a doctor at St. Mungo's. Jenny constantly mentioned how she couldn't wait to get out of Hogwarts so they could start their lives together. Eleanor wasn't sure how long they would last now that he was working. He didn't come tonight, after all.

Astoria stayed rather quiet during the whole thing, looking a bit uncomfortable at everyone talking about sex and boys. She hadn't drank hardly at all that night. She was younger than the rest of the girls, and Eleanor was fairly certain her sister had just dragged her along to avoid getting snitched on. Marietta looked as though she was bursting at the edges to tell everyone about her and Blaise, but something always told her to think better of it, because she never brought him up.

"Well, Eleanor, what do you have to contribute?" Pansy turned an expectant, almost accusatory eye on Eleanor.

"Yeah, you've been shacking up at the Manor all summer, what stories do you have to tickle our Draco Malfoy fantasies?" Daphne added in.

Eleanor just giggled in response, the high amount of alcohol making it hard to form a response in her head. "There's nothing to tell." Eleanor shrugged with a smile. She was trying to sound convincing. Convincing? She didn't need to lie. There really was nothing to tell.

"Hmmm I don't believe it." Jenny laughed. "If anyone in the world lived with Malfoy for a whole summer, something would have happened."

"I wouldn't have been in that house more than 24 hours before jumping him." Pansy put in honestly. All of the girls nodded in agreement. Even Jenny, who was supposedly in love with her doctor boyfriend.

"What can I say? I've got some self control." Eleanor shrugged. "A quality you all might need to invest in."

The crowd all laughed and went back to talking about their sexual escapades. Eleanor was glad to get the spotlight off of herself. She was beginning to feel sleepy. The alcohol, and the yelling, and the singing, and the swimming, and the games from that night were really catching up to her. Her thoughts weren't very coherent anymore. It was a struggle to string those sentences together for the joy of her newfound friends. She also was having a hard time processing her feelings about everyone apparently being so enamored by Draco.

If all of those beautiful girls loved him so much, there was no reason that Draco would stay with her. Her heart fell at the realization, and she didn't like that it did. She would want Draco happy no matter what, right?

Right as she began to drive herself crazy, Draco came out onto the back patio with Eleanor's clothes in hand. He went up to where she was sitting.

"Ready to go?" He asked quietly. Eleanor shook her head.

"I made friends, Draco. We are having such a good time." Eleanor insisted, but her eyes were half closed and her words were slurred together. Draco chuckled at her a bit.

"Blaise is going to have another party soon, and you are more than invited." He assured, as he helped lift her to her feet.

"Are you even drunk?" Eleanor accused as Draco seemed to move with ease and grace as he often did.

"I stopped drinking quite a while ago, so no." Draco laughed, helping her walk towards the door and into the Zabini mansion. "Thank you for hanging out with her tonight ladies, hope to see you next time." Draco said to the girls remaining, who all seemed to swoon at him.

"They're all in love with you, you know." Eleanor pointed out sourly as they walked through the house. She heard Marcus Flint, Blaise and Daniel Harper all talking Quidditch somewhere in the home.

"Does that bother you?" Draco asked, feeling his previous angst and jealousy melting away at her drunken anger.

"Bye Blaise! Thank you for everything! I'll see you again soon!" Eleanor called very loudly throughout the house, her voice echoing. Somewhere, the boys chuckled.

"See you Eleanor, have a good night." Blaise returned.

"Such a nice guy." Eleanor muttered to Draco as they stepped into the fireplace. Draco didn't want to push her any further to say anything. First and foremost, she needed sleep. Draco thought it was safest to go back to the Cordarri Castle rather than his home for the night. Eleanor was quiet and sleepy now. Draco regretted not seeing her at the height of her drunken night. He knew she was the loudest and funniest at the peak of the night, but he caught her on her fall back down. He always seemed to miss the best parts with her. He was determined to not do that anymore.

Eleanor lazily got ready for bed in her room. Draco looked away when she began undressing. She didn't seem to have a care and he didn't want to embarrass her. She ended up with a pair of Draco's old shorts that had been left at her house and an oversized shirt that was both inside out and backwards. She threw her unruly hair into a bun and wiped her makeup off. She was sure to brush her teeth and drink two glasses of water, before laying out some water and medicine for in the morning. Draco was impressed at how thorough her routine still was despite acting like a zombie.

"Will you stay?" She asked. Draco didn't hesitate to lay next to her. She was less drunk after going to the bathroom and drinking some water, but still extremely tired.

The lights were off and the pair laid there for a long while. Draco was sure Eleanor was asleep, but she spoke up quietly.

"Draco, I didn't like it when all of those girls were talking about how much they wanted to be with you." Eleanor confided. Draco smiled to himself as he held her close. Her head was on his chest and her arms were wrapped around his torso. They felt cohesive, like it just made sense for them to be like this.

"Oh yeah?" Draco questioned, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and giving her a small squeeze. He was just relieved to hear some kind of positive emotion.

"I don't know. They are all so pretty, and skinny, and they are all the perfect Slytherin, Pureblood girls. They make the most sense for you. I'm none of those things, Draco." Eleanor sighed. That comment threw Draco off. Not pretty? She thought she wasn't pretty?

"What do you mean?" Draco asked. "Eleanor, you might not be a Slytherin, but-" He was going to go on about how pretty and perfect he thought she was but she cut him off.

"I know that everything they are is everything I am not. You have every reason to want to with them and not me." Eleanor began shaking her head, then groaned a bit from the dizziness that overtook her from doing that. She cursed under her breath. "I'm selfish, but I don't want to see you with anyone else."

Draco was at a loss. He could have gone on forever about how wrong she was, but he knew drunk Eleanor wouldn't respond to a long profession.

"Don't worry, you won't see me with anyone else." Draco assured.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hope y'all are enjoying so far! I'm excited for you all to see how everything is going to turn out! **

* * *

Draco awoke in the middle of the night to the sound of Eleanor retching in the bathroom. He grimaced a bit at the sound, but was concerned for her. It was still dark outside the window, and he knew that she was going to have a rough day.

He watched as she dragged her feet out of the bathroom, left her room, and returned with a vile a few minutes later. She noticed Draco was awake then.

"Sorry for waking you." She whispered. Her voice was weak, but no longer intoxicated.

"It's fine. Are you alright?" Draco asked.

"Yeah, just had to get it out of my system I guess." Eleanor chuckled. "Found this potion of my dad's. If you drink it after you throw up for the first time, then go back to sleep, your hangover is already cured." She twirled the glass bottle of green liquid in her fingers.

"That's convenient." Draco commented, watching her as she sent in down her throat and grimaced at the taste. She sat on the bed and took a long gulp of water before laying next to Draco again, her eyes droopy.

"Don't worry, I brushed my teeth." She joked, before kissing him on the cheek lazily and nuzzling into his neck to fall back to sleep.

* * *

When Draco truly awoke in the late morning, it was to the smell of breakfast this time. A much more pleasant awakening. He smelled potatoes, and eggs and slightly burned toast. He shook his head. She was a mess the night before and she still managed to get up early and make him a nice breakfast. But that was Eleanor.

When Draco stumbled into the kitchen, he saw Eleanor in leggings and a sweater, her hair was wet from showering, and she had an ornate breakfast made. Had she even drank last night? Draco was confused and amazed.

"I expected you to be bedridden all day." Draco joked, leaning on the door frame. Eleanor smirked at him as she spread jam on two pieces of toast.

"That potion works wonders." Eleanor shrugged as she served up the plates. "This breakfast is to say sorry for last night." She said, ashamed. She handed Draco a loaded plate. The two of them sat on the barstools on the kitchen island.

Draco's brows furrowed as he took a bite of eggs. "Sorry for what?" Draco inquired. He hoped she wouldn't apologize for the kiss. He was torn over whether he wanted to talk about that moment with her at all. He was afraid that she would express regret and forbid it from happening again. Best case scenario was that neither of them mention it so that Draco was left to assume she liked it but has since felt too awkward to talk about it due to her feelings for him and they are both silently pining. Yes, that was the way Draco wanted this to go.

"I was a mess last night. I embarrassed you in front of all of your friends." Eleanor laughed a little, but her face was incredibly red. She buried her face into her hands. "Merlin, did you hear me singing in the pool?"

Draco laughed loudly. Eleanor loved the way Draco's true laugh sounded. It filled her with a sense of joy knowing that she made him laugh, even if it was at the expense of her singing every Ella Fitzgerald song in her repertoire wildly off key in Blaise Zabini's pool with girls she hardly knew; none of whom requested those song choices, or even for her to sing in the first place.

"You were brilliant." Draco continued chuckling.

"I was shitfaced." Eleanor laughed, shaking her head at her friend's amusement.

"It was good to see you having such a good time." Draco smiled. "I, for one, am excited for the next one."

"I did have a good time. Thank you for inviting me, and putting up with me." Eleanor took her eyes off of Draco and looked at her eggs. She pushed them around her plate for a while. All that was on her mind was kissing Draco and how she wanted to do it again, and do it constantly. But she knew that wasn't smart. She would end up hurt and feeling abandoned. This summer had brought Draco so close to her, and it was going to hurt like hell when that friendship began to shift, let alone a real relationship.

"You were a pleasure to put up with." Draco smirked, nudging her shoulder, bringing her eyes back to him. "What are you thinking about?" He asked, almost afraid of the answer but still feeling like he needed to know. Was he on her mind? Would she admit if he was?

"Just trying to piece the night together, some of it is a blur." Eleanor laughed a bit, pulling at her toast.

"What parts?" Draco pressed, putting his fork aside, swallowing his mouthful of food and wiping his mouth, giving Eleanor his full attention. Having Draco be completely focused on her made Eleanor squirm a bit, she wanted to talk about it, she wanted to acknowledge their kiss but she also was fighting against that desire; hoping to bury it.

"Just…" Eleanor sighed and looked away from Draco. "I don't know, I'm trying to remember why I got so mad at the girls when I left. What did they say to me?" Eleanor asked, hoping this was a safe enough topic of conversation. She figured that they had made some rude comments about Gryffindor, or her friends. She hoped that hearing about how Draco's friends disrespected her friends would remind her how Draco also did that and would force her to stop thinking about his lips on hers.

Draco chuckled a little at her question and rubbed the back of his neck with a slight blush. "Well...uh...you said that you didn't like that they were all in love with me." Eleanor went red immediately and got up from her spot to get the tea kettle that wasn't yet whistling off the stove. "You were drunk and over exaggerating, of course." Draco tried to cover, seeing her discomfort.

"Of course." Eleanor repeated, not looking at Draco, focusing on making two cups of tea.

"You seemed really bothered by it though." Draco pressed slightly, trying to get some information on her feelings without being too obvious.

"Oh hmm." Eleanor nodded in acknowledgement. Her entire being wanted to talk about their kiss and how much she liked it and wanted it to happen again, but she was trying to stay strong. She couldn't let Draco hurt her more than he normally did with his distance and coldness.

"El," Draco started, getting up from his chair and walking towards her. "No need to be embarrassed by drunk escapades." He tried to continue to joke, but his heart was beating loudly now.

"I'm not embarrassed, I'm just," Eleanor turned around and was surprised to see Draco standing a few inches away from her, "realizing things about last night."

"Things like?" Draco wondered, taking a step closer. He was gentle, he didn't want to push himself on her, but with every second he wanted to be closer to her.

"Things like I kissed you." Eleanor breathed out shakily.

"And?"

"And I'm going to do it again." Eleanor lost self control then. She filled her hands with Draco's face and kissed him. It was slow at first, but quickly turned into a culmination of every feeling she had been bottling up. This was a completely sober kiss, and it was amazing. Merlin, she loved kissing him. Her heart was bursting with strange new emotions that were brought on by this new element to their relationship. She was confused and scared and overjoyed and at peace all at once. She hated not knowing how to process her feelings about this. She had never experienced such a cloud of emotion hanging in her brain.

Lost in the moment, Eleanor put her hand on the counter to brace herself against Draco's lips. She placed her hand on the boiling teakettle and shot away quickly. Her hand removed from the heat, and her lips removed as well.

"Damn it all to hell." She hissed, holding her burnt hand. Draco sighed inwardly, disappointed the kiss was over, but working quickly to make sure Eleanor could heal her hand.

"You gave me a salve at the beginning of summer, where is it?" Draco asked calmly, turning on the cold water so that Eleanor could run her hand under it.

"Medicine cabinet, in the bathroom." Eleanor instructed. Draco disappeared quickly into the bathroom off the kitchen and was absent for a few moments. "Should be top shelf!" Eleanor called. "Oh, and don't forget-"

"Wrappings." Draco finished, waving the salve and wrappings at her. "Got it."

"Thank you, Draco." Eleanor smiled at him. She took the salve and applied it herself, and went to work on the wrappings. Draco rolled his eyes at her apparent stubbornness and need for independence and started wrapping her hand himself. "Thanks." Eleanor said quietly as Draco gently wrapped her hand. "So…" Eleanor trailed off, not sure of what to say next.

"So?" Draco asked.

"...So." Eleanor looked away.

"You're a chicken shit for a Gryffindor, you know that?" Draco asked abruptly.

"What do you mean?" Eleanor demanded, her eyes snapping to his.

"For someone who is supposed to be all courageous, you sure do shy away from a lot of conversations and confrontations." Draco scoffed. "Are we never going to talk about it?"

"That's not fair." Eleanor shot back. "It's only just happened."

"You've been avoiding it all summer, El. I need to know where your head is." Draco sighed, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms, waiting for Eleanor to talk. He was usually the more stoic and hidden in a relationship, but Eleanor was always so guarded and she didn't like to talk about her feelings. She let things bother her, she let them fester and nothing ever got resolved with her. Draco didn't want to wait forever to hear her what she was thinking about her feelings towards him. The conversation was going to be uncomfortable but he had come to the conclusion that it had to happen.

Eleanor began calculating in her mind then. What was she supposed to say? What was she supposed to do? What was she feeling? She couldn't tell. She didn't have answers for him.

"We're just going to yell." Eleanor let out quietly.

"Okay. Then let's yell. Let's scream at each other. If that helps you." Draco pressed.

"It doesn't help me." Eleanor huffed out shortly. "I don't like yelling. It makes me angry and anxious but all we ever do is yell."

"That's not all we ever-" Draco began to protest

"During the important talks, yes. Whenever we talk about our feelings we just end up angry because we are both too proud to recognize either of us holds any blame."

Draco let out a breath and prepared himself to try to not be too proud during this conversation. "Do you want to go sit down somewhere? Maybe we will be less angry if we were more comfortable."

The two made their way up to Eleanor's bedroom. Draco sat on the foot of her bed and Eleanor laid down, her head resting on the foot, near Draco's body.

"Okay." Eleanor breathed, terrified of where this conversation would lead. "Where should we start?" She felt awkward asking, but it's what Draco wanted so she went along.

"Do you want to be with me?" Draco asked, not wasting any time.

"Yes." Eleanor answered without hesitation. Her own firmness shocked her a bit, but she did not qualify her statement.

"So what's the problem? Why aren't you with me?"

Eleanor huffed out a sigh, this question was a little harder. "It's a lot, Draco. My parents are dead. My family is gone. I'm discovering things about myself that I didn't know before and it's throwing a lot of things into the air for me."

"Things like what?" Draco wondered, careful not to overstep but still feeling as though he was asking a fair question.

"Lots of things, Draco." Eleanor responded. "Mostly, I'm learning how to function alone."

"You aren't alone, though."

"You know what I mean." Eleanor shot him a look.

"So you want to be alone?" Draco tried to clarify, her answer didn't make much sense to him.

"No. I hate being alone." Eleanor shook her head. "But a romantic relationship won't replace a parental one."

Draco scrunched his nose. "I'm not trying to replace your father." He scoffed a little. To his surprise, Eleanor cracked a smile and laughed a bit. She shoved his shoulder playfully.

"No, obviously you aren't. I know that." She chuckled, Draco felt relieved to see her smile. "I don't know how to explain it, Draco. I feel like after all of that, I'm still emotionally unavailable." Eleanor sighed and began playing with the hem of her sweater, trying to distract herself. "You're right. I'm just a chicken shit."

Draco waited quietly for her to elaborate. He felt she was finally getting somewhere worthwhile and he didn't want to screw it up.

"I guess I'm just afraid of loss, on any level. After losing my parents, I don't think I could lose anyone else without it wrecking me. Especially you."

"Why would you lose me?" Draco questioned, tentatively playing with a strand of her hair. He knew this usually calmed her down.

"Friendships are easier to maintain than relationships." Eleanor offered simply. "What if you don't like having me for a girlfriend? Then what?"

"You'll still be my best friend." Draco promised.

"Bullshit." Eleanor rolled her eyes at that. "I knew you were going to say something like that. This is the point in the conversation where you stop understanding."

"Enlighten me." Draco offered. "And remember, no yelling."

"You forget me. You are ashamed of me at Hogwarts. You blame it on our different houses, on Harry, on anything. But you have your group and you are afraid of bringing me around. So if I were your girlfriend, and things went south, you really wouldn't put in the effort to be my friend afterwards. You barely put in the effort now."

"And you put in so much effort? Do you forget that your friends hate me too? They hate my parents. They think my father is a Death Eater, they try to convince you to stay away from us. In second year they thought I was trying to unleash a monster on the school. You stand in the middle of us and pretend to be blameless but you don't defend me to them." Draco let out, taking extra care to keep his voice even, but finding it very difficult.

"I do." Eleanor nodded. "I tell them that I don't like it. I tell them you are good."

"Do you? Or do you just change the subject? You know, you do that a lot."

"Do what?"

"Change the subject, when things get uncomfortable." Draco was getting frustrated now. He didn't want to yell, and he wouldn't. But, Merlin, he could have.

"Oh please. I don't ever do that. I actually face my problems, Draco. It's you who doesn't want to stand up and be accountable for your feelings and the way you behave, and that's why you leave me in the dust every year."

"El," Draco sighed.

"Hm?" Eleanor inquired, taking a deep breath to calm herself.

"You just changed the subject."

Eleanor's mouth made a perfect little 'O' as if she just realized what she had done. "I didn't mean to." She said quietly.

"I know you didn't." Draco nodded in understanding. He used this pause in conversation to collect himself once more.

"I just…" Eleanor trailed and took a deep breath. "I'm just scared, I guess. But I don't want you to think it is because of you, it's not. I don't know, Draco. I'm confused about what I want and I only just started feeling this way and it is a weird time for me to be getting romantically involved with anyone because of my parents. Please be patient with me. I'm still figuring this all out."

"I am too." Draco assured, laying a tentative kiss on her forehead.

"I don't know if you are capable of taking things very slow, but do you think you could try?" Eleanor asked. "Slow and awkward and -"

Draco put his lips on hers to shut off her rambling (and because he admittedly just wanted to kiss her again). "Can I still do that if we take it slow?" Eleanor smiled at him, her heart was so grateful that he was halfway understanding and was willing to try with her.

"I encourage it."


	11. Chapter 11

Draco was in a bad mood again. He thought that the changing relationship between Eleanor and himself would lighten his spirits but he only found himself more confused than ever on what they were doing. And now, she was leaving again. Not only was she leaving, but she was leaving to see Potter and his whole band of cronies.

"You just saw them." Draco pointed out as Eleanor searched her room for a matching shoe.

"I won't be long. Just dinner." Eleanor sighed, getting on her hands and knees and looking under the bed in her room at Malfoy Manor.

"You're always leaving." Draco muttered quietly. Eleanor rolled her eyes as she fished the shoe she was looking for out of the abyss. She slipped it on her foot and walked over to Draco. She placed a small peck on his cheek.

"I'll see you later." She told him. "Try not to be so whiny when I get back."

Eleanor was nervous beyond belief for her dinner with Remus. What wracked her nerves even more was her inability to get reassurance from anywhere because she made a point that no one knew where she was going and who she would be with. She wasn't quite ready for the world to know she was Remus Lupin's biological daughter - and even less ready for the Malfoys to know.

She arrived early so that she could collect her thoughts a bit before seeing him, but once she arrived at her favorite bench in Diagon Alley, she realized that Remus was already sitting there waiting for her.

"Oh," Eleanor let out with surprise, "I didn't think you would be beating me here." She laughed.

"I wanted to arrive early to be able to greet you." Remus smiled, unsure of whether he should hug her or let her be. She was wondering the same, unbeknownst to him.

"I hope you weren't waiting too long." Eleanor chuckled, rubbing her hands nervously on her pants.

"No, no. Not at all." Remus assured, then motioned towards the restaurant. "Shall we?"

Once the pair was seated in the unpopulated diner, they both distracted themselves with the menu. Remus was telling himself he had to say something. He was the adult, after all. But he didn't know what to say that wasn't vomit-inducingly cliche. Should he ask her about her hobbies and interests? That seemed too mundane. But where else was he supposed to start?

"Would you want to split some sausage rolls to start?" Remus tried to casually break the ice.

"Oh, I don't eat meat." Eleanor replied quietly. "I'm sorry."

Well, this was sufficiently awkward. "Oh, no no. Don't apologize. I didn't realize." Remus cleared his throat, and Eleanor felt extremely guilty but was having trouble finding an alternate suggestion. "How long have you been doing that?" Remus asked.

"I've always had a bit of an aversion to it, but just this summer is when I recently got serious about it." Eleanor explained. "I still eat seafood sometimes though. Only because I like it too much to give it up forever. A bit selfish of me, but..."

"We can all be a little selfish sometimes." Remus smiled at her. "Can I ask why you stopped officially?"

Eleanor wanted to tell him it was because she experienced death and loss first hand and didn't want to have any blood on her hands, but she thought that might be a bit morbid for the dinner table so she just shrugged. "Lots of reasons, I guess."

It fell quiet again after that. Remus clung to this new piece of information about Eleanor. It was a piece of her that he held now; something he could tell people. "Ah yes, my daughter doesn't eat meat. Well, she eats fish sometimes, though not too often." He would say with pride. Although he knew he would never truly be in a situation where he was free to boast about his daughter, she was still a Cordarri by law even if she was a Lupin by blood. Remus also knew that her heart would always prefer to be a Cordarri.

"What are you thinking?" Eleanor asked suddenly, drawing Remus out of his thoughts. His eyebrows knit together, it was a very complicated question that he wasn't sure he could answer truthfully. Eleanor looked stumped at his apparent confusion to her question. "To eat." She clarified, pointing to her menu.

"Oh yes, ah," Remus glanced at the menu again for a quick moment, "I believe the pasta bowl was calling my name." He smiled good naturedly.

Eleanor's lips stretched into a small grin. "That sounds like a good choice." She nodded once, returning her eyes to the menu. Merlin, this was awkward. Would it ever get better, or would their relationship be permanently stained with forced pleasantries?

"What are you leaning towards?" Remus inquired.

"I think a nice salad will hit the spot." Eleanor nodded in confirmation, laying her menu on the table. She wanted to get over the awkwardness, but she missed having the barrier to hide behind.

Eleanor paused for a moment, realizing how right Draco was about how she was really terrible at confronting anything. People, her feelings, uncomfortable situations. Eleanor dealt almost exclusively in what she already knew. How on earth did she get sorted into Gryffindor?

"What have you been doing since you left Hogwarts last year?" Eleanor asked, sipping her water. Remus had always been an amazing, intelligent and loving professor. Eleanor had no doubt he was off doing amazing things after leaving the castle walls.

"Uh, well, I've been living with Sirius and helping the Order mostly." He said very quietly.

"Lots to do there?" Eleanor inquired, her brows knitting together. Hermione had been brief on the inner workings of the Order.

"Some busy times, some slow times." Remus nodded. "Never too bad."

Eleanor wanted to ask if they really had any proof of Lucius being a Death Eater, or if they really thought there would be a war. Neither questions seemed appropriate for the dinner table, so she fell quiet. The waitress came by and took their orders, refilled their waters, and promised to return soon with food.

"What has been keeping you busy lately?" Remus asked, then grimaced immediately realizing how her summer must have been spent.

"I've been staying with the Malfoys the majority of the time. Draco has been keeping me company." Eleanor provided the bare minimum, she didn't want anything getting back to Hermione about her and Draco's odd sort of relationship without her telling her first.

"Are you and Draco close?" Remus wondered, he had only heard negative stories about him and was interested in what a wonderful and kind girl would be doing hanging around that sort.

"Since we were kids, yeah." Eleanor responded. "It's rather difficult being friends with both him and Harry." She added with a chuckle.

"I can imagine." Remus let out a laugh in response, thinking only of Harry and Ron's open distaste for the Malfoy boy. "He is kind to you, though?"

"Yes. He is very guarded, and he is a huge prick, but there is something to be said about the Malfoys and their undying loyalty and support to their own."

"I suppose loyalty is an honorable quality, although surprised the Malfoys have it."

Eleanor's heart fell. She wished more than anything that her two worlds could meet peacefully and merge without conflict, but apparently that was a luxury not afforded.

* * *

After dinner, Eleanor and Remus walked through Flourish and Blotts and both picked up a few books. One of the many things the pair had in common was a love of reading. After the awkwardness of the dinner had began to dissipate, Remus got more of a sense as to who Eleanor was at her core. Eleanor was also able to see deeply into Remus. Their similarities were a bit shocking to both of them. Eleanor was wondering what behaviors were passed by blood from Remus and what she had learned from her parents. The more time she spent with Remus, the more she realized he was very much like her parents. This offered her heart some relief, but she wasn't sure why.

Her and Remus had walked about with new books in tow laughing about one thing or another, they had a very similar sense of humor, and sharing stories. Eleanor felt at ease with him by the end of the night, and returned back to Malfoy Manor later than expected.

Draco had stayed up waiting for Eleanor, but didn't want it to be obvious. So he was in his room, with the lights dimmed but door slightly cracked as he worked on a bit of summer homework. He heard her come in and cracked a tiny smile, he would admit only to himself that he was excited to talk to her.

Eleanor walked in front of his door and poked her head in. She smiled at him concentrating on his readings as he held a drying quill in his fingers over a piece of partially rolled parchment. Draco was surely concentrating, but he wasn't concentrating on his homework. His mind was focused solely on how to look as though he had not noticed Eleanor come in, and how to remain stoic as she watched him from the door. How could he best look as if he didn't notice her?

"Can I come in, or are you too busy?" Eleanor asked softly. Draco smirked to himself and looked up to see her face.

"Oh, I didn't hear you come in." He stated. It was a bold faced lie, his heart was racing the moment he heard the Floo roar, but she would never be the wiser, and his pride would remain saved. "I have a few more pages in the chapter. You can sit while I finish." He offered nonchalantly, gesturing to the big leather chair next to his that sat in front of the fireplace. Eleanor nodded with a smile and set her bag of new books on the floor as she curled up in the chair next to his.

He was frustratingly charming and collected. Her mind was still fuzzy and confused as to what she wanted and how to handle herself, but he seemed to have the opposite problem. To Eleanor, it seemed as if Draco wasn't even interested or bothered with thinking about her. Which confused her further because he had fought for this and started the conversation about them. Draco didn't even look at her, he returned to his Potions book. Eleanor didn't like being confused about her feelings and she certainly didn't like being confused about Draco's.

Draco could almost sense when Eleanor began to overthink. He knew from the moment she walked in that she was beginning to spiral. He internally winced, because he knew that his nonchalance was what caused it. However, he couldn't have an immediate change of mood. He thought for a moment of what he could do to make it up to her, to pull her out of her head.

Without looking up from his book, he dropped his hand over to the arm of her chair. The action came across as almost lazy, but it was perfectly calculated. Seeing Draco reach out to her shook Eleanor out of her own head as she grabbed his hand. Their fingers laced together delicately. She stared at his perfectly serene face, though his lips moved quickly and in a miniscule fashion as he mouthed the words to himself. Draco was trying to concentrate on his reading, he really was, but he could feel Eleanor's eyes. Her thumb slowly dragged back and forth across the back of his hand. It was driving him mad.

He snapped his book closed in a swift movement and had his hands placed firmly on the arms of the large black chair. His face loomed over Eleanor's, his breath beat briefly over her flushed face. Eleanor wanted to kiss him. She wanted to gather him up, pull him into her, consume herself with him. But something in her froze, all she could do was look into his ice blue eyes. She was stuck.

Draco hoped Eleanor could not hear his heart. It would blow his entire cover. He was supposed to be cool and smooth and not desperate. He felt the opposite of all of these things. He wanted to crumple looking at her and her warm face, her full lips, her kind eyes. This wasn't him, this wasn't Draco. She turned him into someone that he wasn't. Or maybe, she turned him into the person he had been hiding. Either way, he felt he needed to gain control of himself again. He needed to be the Draco that he had painstakingly crafted over the years, the Draco that everyone knew him to be.

He leaned down and captured her lips with his. She felt warm, like coming home.

No, he couldn't think that way. He couldn't let her melt him, not more than she already had. He turned his mind off and just worked his lips against hers. He loomed over her, in control. She slowly and gently brought her hands to the sides of his face, sitting up slightly to lean into him. She mentally and physically brought him to his knees in front of her.

Draco's hands came to rest of Eleanor's thighs, slowly inching up to her hips. She slid into his embrace so that they were both on the floor. The heat from the fireplace and the heat between them flushed both of their cheeks. Draco's hand had found a bit of bare skin at the bottom of Eleanor's back. His hands felt warm on her skin. Her insides were mush. Every moment of this, of him, was heaven.

"Eleanor?" the soft voice of Narcissa called down the hall, as footsteps came closer. Draco groaned low in his throat as he broke away from Eleanor's lips. The pair untangled their limbs as Narcissa entered Draco's room. Eleanor wiped her swollen, slightly wet lips quickly before turning to look at the blonde woman. "Oh, I wasn't sure if you had made it back." She said quietly.

"I did." Eleanor nodded with a smile, she thought that Narcissa checking on her was endearing, Draco found it to be an inconvenience. "Thank you for checking."

"Of course, dear." Narcissa smiled. "Did you have a good time with your, uh, friends?" She asked unsurely. Narcissa didn't like thinking about Eleanor running around with the Gryffindor trouble makers, but she was trying her best to be supportive.

"Yes, it was nice to see them." Eleanor answered simply. She didn't want to be rude to Narcissa, but she desperately wanted to return to what her and Draco had previously been occupying their time with.

"Good, good." Narcissa shifted uncomfortably, unable to detect why the mood of the room felt off, but quickly understanding her presence was no longer wanted. "Well, I'm off to bed. Don't stay up too late loves." She bid, then made her exit to the floor above the children, where the master suite was located. Her motherly instinct told her to leave the door open behind her.

This act annoyed the two teens greatly, but made Eleanor rationalize with herself a little bit. She had to slow things down. She got excited and overwhelmed easily. She took a deep breath and leaned into Draco. His back rested on the chair behind them and Eleanor curled into his side as they watched the fireplace. Draco was irritated. He had very much enjoyed where that had been going until his mother popped in, now it seemed the mood was lost.

Draco leaned down and placed his warm lips at the nape of Eleanor's neck. He left a gentle trail of kisses. He thought it was a very obvious hint that he wanted to return to kissing her. She leaned into his lips, tilting her head to give him better access, but made no move to reciprocate the action.

"Ellie," Draco groaned into her soft skin. "Come back."

Eleanor cracked a smile at his little frustration and turned her head so they were face to face. She softly pushed her lips into his. It was gentle and intoxicating. Draco felt a sense of relief, that is, until she pulled away once more.

"Who was your first kiss?" She asked softly, her head laying on his shoulder. She joined their hands, and she began stroking his palm. Draco was going mad. He wanted her and she just wanted to talk.

"You're not going to like the answer." Draco chuckled lowly, still hoping to regain her lips.

"I still want to know." Eleanor said quietly, though now afraid that she would, in fact, not like that answer.

"It was Pansy." Draco let out in a quick huff, waiting to see Eleanor's reaction.

"Oh, hmm." Eleanor responded, her brow furrowed. "That must've been why she was so into you at Blaise's. She's kissed you before." Her voice was contemplative rather than angry so Draco decided in spirit of truth to drop another bomb.

"Well, to be fair, I've kissed all of those girls." Draco confided. Eleanor wondered if he could feel the vibrations of her heart becoming sad against his own chest. She hoped he couldn't. They all had beat her to the punch. Every one of those girls was a better fit for Draco. Eleanor's silence worried him, he knew he shouldn't have said anything. "I'm sorry, does that make you feel weird?"

"Only a little." Eleanor shrugged, she wouldn't let on how worried it made her. All of those perfect, beautiful girls had gotten to him first. She had only just reached their level of experience with Draco, and she wasn't nearly as appealing.

"Which part is weirder?" Draco wondered.

"What do you mean, which part?" Eleanor asked for clarification..

"Is it weirder that you know all of those girls or that I have had more, eh, experience?" Draco tried to phrase it gently, but there was really no way to get around the question. To his great shock, Eleanor began to shake with laughter.

"Draco Malfoy, please don't tell me that you think you were my first kiss?" Those words caused Draco to feel sad, angry and embarrassed all in one flash.

"No, of course not." He scoffed, but part of him had really believed it. "Who was it then?"

"Dean Thomas." Eleanor responded quickly, almost too quickly.

"Was he any good?" Draco shot back quickly.

"Why? Are you interested?" Eleanor joked, this only caused Draco to form a deeper frown. Eleanor could tell he wasn't laughing along, so she composed herself. "It was when we went on a date to Hogsmeade. He kissed me quickly in the back of Three Broomsticks. I didn't like it. We decided we were better as friends."

"And that was your last kiss?" Draco asked sheepishly. Eleanor chuckled softly and turned around to lay a gentle kiss on his cheek.

"No, but I don't have to tell you about the others. Want to know why?" She asked, her lips finding the hollow of his ear and trailing down his neck slowly. Draco wanted to moan, but he didn't dare, he simply grabbed her waist and pulled her closer to him.

"Hmm?" He managed out as Eleanor found a sensitive patch of skin. She sensed his reaction and let her lips brush over that particular spot a few more times before lingering.

"Because right now, you're the only one that matters."

* * *

**Okay so **the updates have been coming really quickly lately, all of your love makes me so excited to continue sharing with you! I just want you all to know everything! I'm busy writing away to finish this story up, but I'm still far from the end! I also have a few tricks and surprises up my sleeve for later on that I am just so so stoked to share with you all!

Also it's been super fluffy recently, but (spoiler alert) it isn't going to be this simple and sweet forever.

And yay! Remus and Eleanor have finally been able to like actually hang out, and more of that is on it's way!

Let me know what you think, what you're excited about, what you want to see more of! I really just love sharing with you all and hearing how you are interacting with this story!


	12. Chapter 12

**Quick note:** I'm so stoked seeing how much you are all enjoying this, it just makes me so excited about everything I have planned. I just want to let you all in on the twists and turns, but I also don't want to get too ahead of myself! This story is going to focus a lot on character growth (specifically Draco) and relationships and family and friendships and all that stuff, so there is a lot of feelings talk - which I hope is okay! Keep letting me know what you're thinking about everything, and what you're excited to see in the future!

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Draco and Eleanor had rose early and retreated to the Cordarri Castle. Narcissa had a few friends over for tea that morning and Draco and Eleanor wanted to be free of their prying eyes. Once arrived at her childhood home, Eleanor made tea for the pair of them and they retreated to her room with some light reading in tow.

Draco was deep in a potions book. It wasn't required reading, which caused Eleanor to chuckle. Draco tried to play it off as if he were uncaring but he was always a brown-noser to Snape, and he was always fighting tooth and nail to dethrone Hermione as the top of their class. They tucked themselves under her lavender comforter. Draco lazily held the book in one hand while tracing soft designs on Eleanor's upper arm with the other. Eleanor's head was tucked into his shoulder, she held her book in both hands. It wasn't required reading for school, it was just a fun book that she had found at Flourish and Blotts the night before.

It was dangerous, the two of them being in the Castle. Draco and Hermione were the only two people who could possibly enter, so their chances of being interrupted were extremely slim. This fact wasn't lost on either party. Eleanor squirmed a little thinking about it. She wanted to jump him, throw away their books and stay in that bed forever. She knew they were capable of doing that, so she forced herself to keep her eyes on the words printed on the page.

She couldn't focus with his soft touch caressing her arm. Even intertwined with him in bed, she didn't feel close enough. She couldn't listen to that, though. She couldn't give in to the pull she was feeling towards him. They had been laying in this position for nearly an hour, Draco was making great progress on his book, while Eleanor had barely flipped the page more than two of three times. Her mind was preoccupied. It would wander to unmentionable places, at which point she would have to remind herself how her and Draco were not official, and how young she was, and how she had to be more responsible.

But his warmth, his hands, the memory of his lips. It all burned inside of her. She felt like she was going crazy. She shot up quickly, shocking Draco who had become quite comfortable and peaceful.

"El?" He asked with humor in his voice.

"Let's go to lunch." She suggested suddenly. "I need to get out of the house." _I need to stop laying in bed next to you before I do something I regret_ was the more accurate reason, however Eleanor didn't dare say so. She climbed out of bed and into the bathroom. She changed into a patterned skirt and simple black top that left her shoulders bare. She slid her feet into sandals quickly and brushed her fingers through her hair. She looked presentable enough, though not up to the standard she would like. She felt added pressure to outshine every girl that Draco admitted to kissing, which was a near impossible task in her eyes.

"Where do you want to go?" Draco asked as she exited the bathroom.

"Oh, any old diner is fine." Eleanor shrugged with a wave of her hand, tearing her eyes away from Draco and his handsome face. "I'm famished."

Draco thought she was acting strange, but went along with it anyway. He knew better than to ask her what was going through her head, he would never get a straight answer. This fact frustrated him, but was one he had to accept for the time being. He hoped this was not a permanent facet of their relationship. _Can I call it that? _Draco thought to himself. Could he? What were they doing? He kissed her, and he liked doing it. Eleanor was fond of cuddling as well, which Draco had never liked but was starting to come around. They spoke as if they were in a relationship, but were they? He honestly couldn't tell.

The two Floo'd to Diagon Alley, but ended up walking around London. Draco knew of a small Wizard diner close to the entrance to the Ministry. He figured it was far enough out of the way so they wouldn't run into classmates. They sat at the counter and were able to peer out the window at the passersby on the street. Eleanor ordered a bagel and soup where Draco ordered a large sandwich. They split a vanilla shake. Draco preferred chocolate, but didn't complain. He also didn't complain when Eleanor reached over to his plate to take some of his chips. He just rolled his eyes and laughed at her. His hand rested gently on her bare knee under the countertop.

Eleanor was hyper aware of his hand. It was like her brain was now suddenly in her knee, it was the source of all the energy in her body it seemed. She couldn't stop thinking about it, focusing on it. Damn it all to hell, this is why she wanted to leave in the first place.

Then she saw a familiar face on the street. His eyes caught hers in the window and Eleanor waved happily to see her friend, who entered the diner upon seeing her. Eleanor hopped off the tall chair and gathered her friend in a hug, causing Draco to immediately form a frown on his face. He knew he had to hold his tongue, but it was going to be hard.

"Harry, it's so good to see you." She gushed happily. Draco was livid, she had just seen him literally the night before, why did Harry Potter have to take more of her time? Draco ground his teeth thinking about how stupid Potter could have been one of the many kisses she had had after Dean Thomas who supposedly "didn't matter anymore".

"You too." Harry smiled, he seemed to be in an especially good mood. "What brings you here?" He asked, pretending like he didn't notice Draco sitting a foot away.

"Oh, just lunch." Eleanor smiled, placing a soft hand on Draco's shoulder. He stiffened at first, then melted under her touch. _Damn it, damn it, damn it_. No, he was supposed to be angry with her. "You?"

"Oh, well I was just on trial at the Ministry." Harry shrugged, jokingly nonchalant. Draco's ears perked at this, but he didn't dare turn around to look him in the eyes. Eleanor's hand left Draco's shoulder and immediately went to Harry's.

"What?" She almost yelled in disbelief. "Harry, what on earth happened?" Draco was confused listening to their conversation, had he not shared his upcoming trial with her the night before?

"It ended up being a big misunderstanding. I was expelled for a bit, but that got overturned. I'm supposed to meet Mr. Weasley here to take me back." Harry explained, Eleanor was not satisfied with his lame response.

"What kind of a misunderstanding gets you a trial at the Ministry?" Eleanor pressed, feeling simply awful for not sending a letter Harry's way. He had a hard summer too.

"A big one." Harry repeated, then shifted his eyes to Draco. "Saw your father." He nodded to the other boy, his teeth on edge and his entire demeanor changed from happy to angry and accusatory.

"You've seen more of him than I have lately, then." Draco shot back hotly, making brief eye contact with Harry, then looking away again. He was seething, absolutely livid. It seemed as though Eleanor had been lying to him, and he was not keen on being lied to. Eleanor could sense Draco's growing frustration and wanted to diffuse the situation.

"How've you been holding up this summer?" Harry's voice changed as he looked at Eleanor with empathy.

Eleanor shrugged. "It's been difficult, as you can imagine. Luckily, I've got some good friends to get me through it." She smiled. It had been awhile since anyone asked her about how she was doing. It felt less condescending coming from Harry. It felt like he understood. Harry smiled at her and nodded. "Are you staying with the Weasleys then?" Eleanor asked, changing the subject. She didn't like to linger on her parents. Draco clenched his fists under the table, he tried to calm himself down. What could she have possibly been doing last night that she needed to lie to him? His mind thought up the worst possible scenarios.

"And Hermione. It's a full house." Harry nodded, alluding to the Order, but unsure of how much Eleanor knew, and not wanting to let Draco in on too much.

"Ah, yes. Hermione has been keeping me updated on how full." Eleanor laughed, letting Harry know that she had an idea.

"You should come visit sometime." Harry offered. "Before school starts. Everyone would love to see you."

Eleanor thought of her best friends there, and she thought of Remus being there. She would have to see all of them soon, she did miss them. "I will have to take you up on that."

"I'll send an owl your way." Harry promised, sensing Draco's growing anger at his being there, and seeing a flash of red hair down the street. He decided he should make his departure. "Or, more likely, Hermione will send an owl your way." Harry laughed and Eleanor joined in.

"It was good seeing you, Harry. Congratulations at evading another bit of bad luck." Eleanor winked as her friend left through the front door with a wave. She was still smiling as she sat back at the counter next to Draco. She reached for another one of his chips good naturedly. Draco's jaw was set angrily. He didn't know what to say or what to even think. He tried to steady his breathing. He didn't want to yell at Eleanor ever, and especially not in this diner. He needed to calm down before he said anything.

Eleanor watched him with narrowed eyes. She knew he didn't like Harry, but this was a bit of an overreaction, even for him. Eleanor was growing annoyed that Draco was acting this way, but was trying hard to be the bigger person and not let this interaction spoil their good day.

"First time you've seen him in a while?" Draco finally asked through gritted teeth. Eleanor wasn't stoked about his tone, but was happy to see he was at least making an effort to talk about her friends.

"Yeah. I haven't seen him all summer." Eleanor said lightly, trying not to think too much about Draco's attitude.

"Hmm." Draco acknowledged, his blood boiling. She had to be seeing someone else. It was the only thing that would cause her to lie to him. It's why she put up such a fight about their being together. "So, where were you last night then?" He asked. His heart was hoping for any reasonable explanation, but he couldn't think of one. He felt his entire body turning green with insane jealousy.

Eleanor's heart dropped. She'd been caught. She would have to tell him about Remus now. Oh, Merlin, how could she have been so stupid? Her hands began shaking softly, and she clasped them together in her lap. "Oh." She choked out, unable to believe her own insane stupidity.

"Yeah. Oh." Draco shot back, his upper lip trembled as if he was fighting back a snarl. "This is fucking ridiculous, Eleanor. I won't be made a fool of." He hissed.

Understanding passed in Eleanor's eyes. Not only was she daft enough to get caught in her own lie, she didn't even think about what must've been going through Draco's mind. He must've thought there was someone else. "Oh, no. Draco, it isn't that at all. It isn't what you are thinking, I promise. Please, let me explain." She whispered desperately, grabbing at his hand. Draco pulled his fingers away from hers and glared at her. "It isn't. I know how it looks. It isn't that."

"Then what is it, Eleanor?" Draco was struggling to keep his angry voice level. His body was almost shaking with rage, and possibly sadness. He couldn't tell (or refused to believe) that he felt sadness running through his veins.

Eleanor struggled to form the words in her head, how was she supposed to tell him her entire life had been a lie? She wasn't a Pureblood, she wasn't a Cordarri by blood. She knew that those two things held a lot of appeal for him. He hated Remus. He wouldn't stay after she told him that she was his daughter. He would have no real reason. Eleanor's eyes filled with tears. Seeing this almost made Draco slip out of the defensive. Almost.

"I-It's my parents." Eleanor breathed out, tears falling from her eyes. She was careful to not cause a scene. "Th-they aren't -" She took a deep breath, trying not to hyperventilate. "They weren't really m-my parents." She tried to rush out. "I-I've been seeing m-my birth father." The words felt like they were choking her as they left her mouth. Her voice was so quiet, she wondered if Draco had even heard her.

His shoulders lost a lost of their tension, and his jaw unclenched. He looked away from her, he had to. She wasn't seeing someone else, but she still lied. "Let's go home." Draco said emotionlessly. He dumped a few Sickles on the counter and handed Eleanor a napkin so she could dry her eyes. He held her hand but didn't look at her. Not even when they were back in her room.

"What is this about?" He demanded softly.

"They left me a letter with their will," Eleanor started, staring at Draco's back. She just wanted him to hold her. She wanted to feel accepted by him still, even though she wasn't who he had always believed her to be. "They told me that they couldn't have children. I was given up to them so they could raise me."

"They lied to you." Draco was trying to blame someone, where did the lies start? How could he end it? How couldn't she be a Cordarri?

"No, Draco." Eleanor shook her head. "They saved me. They gave me a better life." She stared wistfully at a picture of her two biggest fans on her night stand. If only they had been with her now. "In the letter they told me the name of my birth father. I'd been putting off talking to him all summer. I was trying to ignore it. But I couldn't ignore anymore, so we went to dinner. Last night was the first time we did that."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Draco asked, finally turning to see her. She looked defeated as she looked to the paper version of her parents. Her real parents.

"I don't know." Tears dribbled down her face. "I was afraid you wouldn't like me if I wasn't theirs. I didn't know if he was even going to be in my life. I wasn't ready to admit that my mum and dad weren't really my mum and dad." Eleanor tried to scrape together reasons, all of them were true, but felt insufficient in explaining herself.

Draco couldn't be angry. He had no reason to be. He wished he could see Eleanor differently after learning of her different heritage, but this didn't change any memories of them together. She still had the same childhood that he had witnessed and been apart of.

"Draco, I'm not a Pureblood." Eleanor breathed out, barely above a whisper. "I'm not. I'm not Slytherin. I'm not beautiful. I'm friends with Harry Potter." Draco wasn't sure where she was going. "I'm afraid you're going to leave. Maybe not right now, but I'm afraid that in the future you are going to realize that you need something different. I've always been afraid of that, but it's worse now."

Draco only hesitated for a moment before swallowing his pride and sitting next to her on the bed. He wrapped her in his arms, not because he particularly wanted to, but because he knew she needed it.

"You're not different." Draco stated. He wanted his voice to sound endearing, but he wasn't at that place at that moment. "You're still Eleanor."

* * *

Eleanor fell asleep soon after that conversation. Her own tears had lulled her into a nap. Draco couldn't sleep. His mind was racing, not so much about her having a different set of parents, when he thought about it, that part made a lot of sense. No, his mind was racing thinking about how he could make up for being so cold to her. He felt awful. He should have trusted her more.

Eleanor's eyes fluttered open eventually and she looked up at Draco. "Sorry." She let out lowly. "I didn't mean to fall asleep on you."

Draco despised her for being able to apologize with ease. She lived her entire life in apology to others, which wasn't really a good thing, but was very indicative of her heart for other people. Draco's 'sorry' grew rotten in his throat, choking him like bile. He was unsure if he should spit it out or swallow it.

"It's fine." He shrugged off, he cleared his throat, deciding to ignore his apology. "Blaise is having an end of summer party next week, want to come?" He invited. A smile grew on Eleanor's face as she nodded quickly.

"If he'll have me back after last time." She joked, Draco cracked a smile.

"You were highly requested to return, actually." This cause Eleanor to blush, but smile wider. She got up from the bed and walked into her bathroom to brush her hair and change her clothes to something less 'slept in'. "Hey, uh," Draco cleared his throat in discomfort, feeling only slightly braver now that he didn't have to look at her. "I don't want you to think that what you told me earlier changes anything between us. It really doesn't." He left out the apology, he hoped she could sense it in his words.

She smiled from the bathroom, because she could.


	13. Chapter 13

**Quick Note: **This chapter is pretty full and jumps around a bit! I feel like a lot happens here, so let me know what you all are thinking! Theories? What are you most excited to learn more about? I love hearing from all of you! I hope you enjoy it!

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When Eleanor was invited to the Order of the Phoenix headquarters for dinner late that summer, she was admittedly shocked. She was sure that she, an outsider who was fraternizing with the enemy, would be entirely unwelcome. However, she apparently had many fans on the inside to plead her case: Hermione, Harry, Remus, the entire Weasley family. They seemed to have won the vote.

When Eleanor arrived at the headquarters, she was immediately enamored with the atmosphere. She had been there once, briefly and unexpectedly. This time was different, she was welcomed with open arms by all of the inhabitants. She was caught up in multiple different conversations with several people, her head was spinning. She hadn't gotten much social interaction outside of Draco for the past nearly three months. Only once everyone was seated at the long table for dinner (Eleanor nestled softly in between Hermione and Remus) did it finally fall quiet.

"So tell me Miss Cordarri, how close are you with the Malfoys?" Sirius asked, taking a large bite of his piece of meat. The mood changed a bit with his words, Remus glared at his friend from across the table. Eleanor shifted uncomfortably. She was very good at compartmentalizing her friendships and didn't like it when they seemed to mix because she only ever received scorn from either side. She felt like a hypocrite because because of the fights she had with Draco earlier in the summer, but she had to admit that she at least put in effort with both sides whereas Draco simply chose one.

"Less so since the passing of my parents. Draco and I have remained good friends though." Eleanor answered honestly. There was a general grumble of disapproval at Draco's name.

"Have you seen anything out of the ordinary at the Malfoy residence this summer?" Sirius pressed, both Molly and Remus groaned.

"Honestly, Sirius, she is a dinner guest. She did not come here to be grilled. Let the poor girl alone." Molly huffed angrily before smiling at Eleanor widely. "So sorry dear."

Eleanor waved her off. "I know what you're asking. You want to know if Mr. Malfoy is a Death Eater." Eleanor answered simply, she was hurt at this thought. Lucius had never been the most upstanding man, nor was he particularly kind to those he didn't know well, but he was her father's best friend. He had taken Eleanor in, and she knew if it ever came down to it, he would protect Eleanor like she was one of his own so she felt obligated to do the same. "I know Harry says that he was there that night in the graveyard -"

"He was." Harry put in quietly. Eleanor rolled her eyes a little.

"Maybe he was. Maybe you were under a lot of pressure and overwhelmed. I don't know. I wasn't there." Eleanor shrugged, these people were kind and wonderful, so for that reason she tried to keep malice from her voice, but she was fiercely protective of the Malfoys because they had always been protective of her. "All I know is that Lucius Malfoy made a lot of mistakes in the first war; mistakes that he has repented for. He has been by my family's side my entire life, and I trust him a great deal. After raising a family of his own, after loving my parents so much, I don't know, I don't think he could be a Death Eater." Eleanor concluded.

"If you could maybe just look for a shred of evidence-" Sirius tried to bargain.

"Sirius, that's enough." Remus said firmly. "Not the time, place, or person to be discussing this with." Eleanor was grateful that Remus had stepped in.

Eleanor looked around the table warily, waiting for anyone else to start asking her questions about the Malfoys but the majority of those present seemed to be more interested in Remus, who was always protective of the children, but was seldom so forthcoming and firm. Eleanor adjusted herself in her seat, trying to ease some of the tension building up within her. She knew that Sirius knew she was Remus' daughter, but she trusted Remus' word when he said Sirius was the only one.

They all stared back at her like she was a traitor, or at the very least an outsider who had no business being around a top security table. Tonks hadn't given her a kind look all night, which seemed a bit revolutionary for this woman who happily chatted with everyone else around the table. With the chatter around them rising, Eleanor and Remus whispered quietly amongst themselves.

"They don't trust me. Why did they let me in here if they don't trust me?" Eleanor let out in annoyance.

Remus chewed slowly, thinking very carefully through his answer before responding. "I think they are more curious to know what you know about the Malfoys than they are afraid of what you might report back."

"Seems like a dangerous gamble." Eleanor tried to joke, but Remus shook his head slightly to tell her to stop herself in her tracks and shot his eyes over to Moody and Tonks, who were watching the two whisper very closely.

"You have some strong advocates in here." He smiled slightly at Harry, Ron, and Hermione who were joking together. "You four remind me a lot of us when we were younger."

"Am I a lot like you were?" Eleanor inquired lowly, very aware that no one at the table besides Remus and Sirius knew her parentage.

"In some ways, yes." Remus nodded pensively. "You remind me a lot of Sirius in other ways too. Your humor is very similar. I think you two will get on very well."

"When he stops accusing Lucius of being a Death Eater, I'm sure we will." Eleanor agreed with a quick smile and raised eyebrows. Remus simply shook his head and chuckled.

"Yes, Sirius will definitely like you."

"Should we tell them?" Eleanor asked suddenly, surprising herself when she said it. "I mean, the Order. I want to tell the others separately, if you don't mind."

"It's all up to what you want," Remus responded, careful not to show so much emotion that she feel obligated to reveal their relationship.

"I think we should." She said with finality, causing Remus' face to break out in a wide grin. "I think it will answer a lot of questions."

Once everyone had finished eating, Remus asked the Weasley children, Harry and Hermione to leave so he could discuss Eleanor with the Order. Eleanor shot her friends an "I'll tell you later" look before they could protest, though she wasn't sure how much later she would be telling them. It was still hard for her to accept that she had a father, despite burying hers a few months prior. She was confused still on how she felt, and didn't want to add to the confusion by letting her friends in on it. And she didn't want to risk it getting back to Draco, who she was still afraid of the reaction from. It had been nerve wracking enough to tell him she wasn't biologically a Cordarri, the anxiety it caused her to tell him about Remus was enough to make her put it off.

"As some of you know, I was a bit...absent from Order business for a year or so during the first war." Remus began, then cringed slightly at his choice of starting by bringing attention to his rapid romance with Eleanor's mother. "I know that this raised a lot of suspicion then, and even still now warrants an explanation. Eleanor is my explanation." _Oh, Merlin, he couldn't have presented this any worse. _

"Oh, Merlin, mate, could you have thought of a more awkward way to reveal this?" Sirius joked, pinching the bridge of his nose. The joke from his friend, and the small laugh from his daughter next to him relaxed Remus' shoulders. For the first time in over a decade, Remus wasn't alone. He had a family. He felt confident. Which was something he hadn't felt since Eleanor's mother…

"Eleanor is my daughter." Remus stated simply, smiling at the young woman next to him, shocked even still at how closely she resembled her mother.

There was a general murmur between members of the Order coming to terms with this new bit of information, but Eleanor only heard Mrs. Weasley say smilingly: "Oh, finally. I'm so glad you decided to tell."

"You knew?" Eleanor asked, trying to remember if Remus said she had known.

"Of course I knew." Mrs. Weasley exclaimed. "Who do you think found you your home with Olga and Darius?"

Eleanor's mouth hung open in shock but before she could ask for more information, Sirius spoke up.

"Now we've got a real spy on the inside."

* * *

Eleanor's heart hurt, she had been trying to find a time to confide in her friends about her changing relationship with Draco. She had wanted to come clean and get their advice, but it was becoming very clear that her connection to the Malfoys already put her at risk for interrogation. Having that closer bond with Draco only increased that. She wasn't sure that she could remain neutral and still be completely honest with both parties.

So Eleanor didn't disclose to anyone her feelings for Draco. It felt dishonest, but she wasn't actively lying - which is how she attempted to justify shielding the truth from her friends. In return, she had been only giving minimal information to Draco about who she was spending time with. She would tell him if she was spending time with her biological father, but she had yet to tell him who that was. She never dared mention The Order. She wasn't apart of it, not technically, and while she fiercely fought against the idea that Lucius was a Death Eater, she wasn't completely sure that he wouldn't exploit that information if he had it.

Eleanor had found herself living a double life, unable to completely confide everything to anyone. All of her friends getting half truths and incomplete stories. She was holding a lot to herself, and it was in those times where so much of her life seemed to be going unshared that she missed her mother the most. Her mother would have known what to say; about Draco, about the Order, about the pressure she was feeling from both sides, about Lucius and her inability to prove his innocence, and why she felt like she needed to prove anything, and of course about Remus. Her mother would know how to calm her anxious heart, even if it was just lending a listening ear, but her mother was not here, and she would never be. In consequence, Eleanor was left to be eaten alive by her own thoughts.

Draco noticed how she had been retreating into her own head recently, and he almost desperately would try to bring her back. He felt time running out with them returning to Hogwarts in little more than a week, he felt something needed to be solidified.

He would try to distract her from spiraling deep into her own mind by kissing her, but that almost seemed to worsen it. She was only truly distracted when they were talking, but she didn't ever want to do that, which annoyed him. He was hoping to kill two birds with one stone by exploring her mouth with his.

"Are you ready to go back to school?" Draco asked one night a few weeks after her dinner with the Order, exhausted from trying to elicit some response by kissing her neck for what felt like hours (but Draco was notoriously impatient, so it really wasn't very long at all). Eleanor shrugged at his question.

"Yes and no. I'm ready to get my mind busy, but not ready for … everything else." She let out slowly.

"Where am I possibly going to kiss you at school?" Draco tried to charm her. They were sitting in the parlor of the Malfoy Manor, Lucius was gone which wasn't unusual for the summer, and Narcissa said she was to join him, but Draco was unsure if that was the truth. Either way, the two had the Manor to themselves for awhile before she was leaving again for dinner. But Eleanor was unusually stoic, he noticed she got like that before dinners with her biological father. He wished she would tell him more about that man, or that she would tell him what she could possibly be thinking that was so interesting that she had barely reciprocated any physical contact all night, or that she would just stop seeing him altogether. None of those things happened.

"I'm sure you'll think of places." Eleanor smirked a little, blinking out of her zoned out stare and being brought back to reality and stopping herself from obsessing about all of the things she wasn't telling Draco. She liked him when he was like this. She liked to be pursued a bit by him, she liked playful. Draco was still learning what she did and didn't respond to. She was so unbelievably confusing.

"I've got an awful memory, I can't think of a single place. Where would you suggest?" Draco breathed lowly. Eleanor played with the collar of his shirt, not meeting his eyes. It was hard for her to look at him knowing she would spend the night with people who asked her every hour invasive questions about him and his family. Even though she always refused to answer, she still felt like she was betraying them.

"Hmm, well I suggest my lips, obviously, it's a given." Eleanor chuckled as Draco pecked her softly.

"You know what I meant." He growled playfully, he was trying to show her he was trying to make time for her at school, but she didn't seem to be responding.

Eleanor hummed a little, positioning herself to sit in his lap. "I do like it when you kiss my neck," She continued, then leaned forward to put her lips to his ear, "I don't mind when you nibble a little either." She whispered dangerously low, her voice raspy. Draco nearly groaned, attaching himself to her neck and sucking softly. Eleanor loved this, she did, it broke her out of her head for a while. She had to keep it exciting and different enough so that she wouldn't fall into a lull that would allow her mind to wander. Eleanor barely breathed as Draco trailed his hot lips down to her collar bone, lingering for a moment before reaching the neck of her tank top. His warm hand reached up to pull the material down just a little. His eyes looked up at Eleanor for a moment for approval but her eyes were closed, her neck thrown back and her chest heaving with lusty breaths; heaving further into his lips, deep and quick, pushing herself closer to him. Closer was all she wanted to be. In a near moan, but more of a quiet grunt, Eleanor maneuvered herself so that she was now straddling Draco.

_We should stop, _Draco tried to convince himself, _we need to slow down. _

His mind was in a pure place (relatively) however the rest of him, and all of Eleanor, was not. As he stayed suckling on her tender, pale skin, Eleanor began clawing at the hem of her shirt. She pulled it untucked and was trying to slip it over her head as quickly as possible. Draco slowed her hands by grabbing them with his own.

"Draco…" She moaned, picking his face up from her chest and connecting their lips - his slightly swollen, "please?" She let out in a quiet whine.

Draco, who loved more than anything to be in control, found himself relishing in the fact that Eleanor was taking charge in this interchange. He wanted to bask in the experience of letting Eleanor do whatever she wanted solely because she could, because he would let her. But the rational voice in his head told him that she still wasn't in the right place to be making decisions like these. He had originally been kissing her to pull her out of a state of anxious overthinking. This wasn't the cure to her spiraling mind. He knew that, despite how good it felt to be beneath her.

"El," Draco murmured against her lips, eliciting no response from her, "Ellie, we need to stop." He said as he pulled away.

"I don't want to." Eleanor tried to convince him.

"Me neither," Draco chuckled as she left his lap to sit next to him, "but we are taking things slow, remember?"

"I don't get it," Eleanor sighed. "Do you not want to?" She was afraid to ask the question, she was so stained with insecurity. Draco didn't know what to say, how was he supposed to tell her that he didn't want her to regret anything she did to distract herself from her grief and anxiety? How was he supposed to protect her heart from himself while also assuring her that she was _very _wanted by him?

"I do, El, really." He told her sincerely. "You have a dinner to get to." He nodded at the grandfather clock in the corner that showed she was already five minutes late for dinner at the Burrow.

"Shit." She mumbled to herself, getting up quickly and trying to straighten her clothes before rushing to the fireplace.

As she disappeared in green flames, Draco was left to wonder if he was doing the right thing for the both of them. He didn't know what she needed from him and he didn't know what he needed from her. They were so young still, and her with so much to deal with. He knew he couldn't take advantage of her vulnerability, even if he cared for her deeply, it still felt manipulative.

But he had to admit, he really, _really _wanted to.

* * *

Hermione was the first one to see Eleanor when she came through the Floo. Dinner was at the Burrow that night, just the Weasleys plus Harry, Hermione and Remus. Eleanor was relieved, she wasn't sure she could stomach the entire Auror office asking her about the Mafloys, especially after what happened with Draco only moments before. Eleanor wasn't even sure she could tell Hermione, or what she would tell her if she did. _What base is that? Is that even a base? It kind of felt like it was in between. Does it count if she wanted to go further? Why didn't he?_

"'Mione." Eleanor hugged her friend, still having a bit of Floo ash on her shoulder. Hermione went to swipe it off in their hug when her eyes were brought to dark red and light purple speckles all over the side of Eleanor's neck.

"Eleanor," Hermione gasped out, her brown eyes wide with shock as she continued staring at the clusters of kiss-shaped bruises, "what is this?"

Eleanor felt all of the color drain from her face, her stomach iced over and her hand clapped to her neck. "I-I … err … ummm…." Eleanor began stammering, no words being able to find their way out of her mouth. How was she going to explain this one? Her eyes filled up with tears of embarrassment and shame. She shouldn't have kept this from Hermione. "I don't know what I was thinking." Eleanor's words fell out of her mouth as if they were tripping over each other. She truly didn't know what she had been thinking, it felt good, it was a distraction, she was able to think about something else rather than her dishonesty towards her friends, she felt close to Draco even though she felt that she had been betraying him.

"Eleanor you didn't…" Hermione trailed off, she tried to be a supportive friend but the judgement still lingered in her eyes and voice.

"No, no, no, no." Eleanor waved her hands wildly as she frantically tried to think of a way to dismiss bad assumptions from her best friend's mind, but were the assumptions bad if they were almost right? _Not almost right! Draco refused! Why did he refuse? _"It isn't what you are thinking, we just - I just - he just -"

"Sucked on your neck?" Hermione asked, a bushy brow raised high on her tanned face. Eleanor's cheeks her bright red as she looked down at her shoes. Her skirt was hanging crookedly so she adjusted it a little to appear more normal, Hermione noticed this as well but didn't say anything. Eleanor gulped a little, unable to look at her friend. Somehow, despite Hermione being only an inch or two taller and much more slender, it still felt like she towered over Eleanor. "Come on, I have some concealer, I'll help you cover them up. Viktor would leave them all of the time." Hermione chuckled a little as she led Eleanor the back way to the powder room so that she wouldn't be ambushed by the Weasley brothers.

Eleanor sat on the toilet, with her hair pulled to the side as Hermione dabbed a makeup sponge over Draco's little love notes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hermione asked.

_Yes, more than anything_ Eleanor thought, but instead shook her head. Hermione was loyal, she wouldn't tell anyone if Eleanor asked her not to, but it was easier to keep her friends in specific boxes if they were all in the dark about the other. It made it harder for Eleanor to balance, but it kept her social circles neat and tidy.

"At least answer me this: was it a one time thing?" Hermione pressed both with her words and with the sponge, causing Eleanor to hiss a little.

"Erm … well technically, this was a one time thing." Eleanor nodded, dancing with her words a bit to satisfy Hermione while not being totally untruthful.

"Technically? What do you mean 'technically'?"

"This was the one and only time he's left any evidence." Eleanor conceded, admitting to herself that it felt good to give at least a little bit of information to Hermione, her heart seemed a little lighter. Hermione smirked down at her friend. She'd seen her kiss her fair share of boys, but this one shocked her a little. Eleanor loved to tell Hermione these things, and her not disclosing any feelings for Draco was out of the ordinary. Hermione almost felt guilty for making Eleanor feel ashamed for her feelings, but it was Draco after all. Perhaps Eleanor's feelings of shame were valid. "It's been a long summer." Eleanor breathed out.

"A lot has happened?" Hermione kept her question light, leaving it open to Eleanor to choose what to tell her. Eleanor had certainly changed and withheld many of her thoughts and feelings, Hermione never wanted to push her into sharing.

Eleanor wanted to tell her everything, how Remus was her father and how her and Draco's relationship was changing, and how she didn't feel like she was properly honoring her parents, and how her mind was swimming and overwhelmed with the conflict between Draco and her friends. But instead she said nothing.

* * *

"So, you meet with your Head of House this year to discuss future career plans," Remus began slowly as the two sat on the Weasley's front lawn. Molly had begun to scold the Twins and somehow Ron had gotten wrapped into it, who Harry felt he needed to stand by. So Remus and Eleanor made their escape to the lawn to have a few quiet moments. "Do you have any idea of what you want to study?"

Eleanor groaned at his question, on top of everything else, she didn't necessarily want to think about her absolute lack of a plan for the future. Realistically, she could live off of her parent's fortune quite comfortably without ever having to work, but Eleanor wanted to work, she just didn't know what she wanted to do.

"I'll take that as a no." Remus chuckled, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder. "It's alright, you will figure it out."

"What did you study?" Eleanor asked softly, hoping he would give her some guidance. Had her parents been alive, they would have.

Remus stiffened a little. "Honestly, my goal was simply graduating. I knew that I wasn't likely to get hired anywhere due to my … well, you know." He gestured vaguely up at the moon. This was something that Eleanor had forgotten about. Remus cleared his throat once, hoping to get off the subject of his hairy little problem. "Any news about your parents?" He asked softly, he seemed to want to jump from one harsh topic to another, he winced at his own insensitivity.

To his dismay, Eleanor shrunk away from him and his question. "According to the Ministry, my parents dropped completely dead in the Department of Mysteries for absolutely no reason at all."

"They are still telling you that?" Remus' brows knit together.

Eleanor started pulling up the grass at her sides and looking away. Tears filled the brim of her eyes. Draco and her friends were nice distractions, but the lack of answers was always swimming in her mind, always taunting her, her parents were gone with no explanation as to why.

"Yeah, I send a letter every week, every response is the same. 'We're so sorry, Miss Cordarri, the tests we have run were inconclusive. We will contact you when we are able to provide an official answer.' It's a load of shit." Eleanor mocked the letters in a monotone voice. "Sorry." She added hastily for her language without really meaning it. Remus waved her apology off as he searched her face for an indication of what she wanted or needed from him in terms of comfort. "I don't know what I am supposed to do."

"Couldn't you talk to Lucius? He's known for pulling strings in the Ministry." Remus suggested reluctantly, he didn't want to admit that Lucius Malfoy could give her something that he couldn't.

"I haven't seen him all summer," Eleanor explained feebly. "I don't think he wants to see me."

Remus felt the Sirius inside his head besmirching Lucius. Part of him wanted to say that this was proof that he was conniving with Voldemort, or that he was involved, or, best case scenario, he just didn't want to deal with a grief stricken teenager. But Remus swallowed those comments, he swallowed his hatred from Lucius and put a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Everyone deals with grief differently." He paused. "Next time you see him, you should ask."

* * *

It so happened that the next time Eleanor saw Lucius was a little less than a week later. She was at Malfoy Manor getting ready to leave with Draco to Blaise Zabini's End of Summer party. For longer than Eleanor would like to admit she stood in front of the mirror trying on different bathing suits. For some reason this party felt more important than the last one. It felt like there was something riding on it this time, maybe because her and Draco were actually an item - _were they an item? What were they? _

Eleanor sighed, hoping that she would get drunk enough to not compare herself to the other girls that splashed around in Blaise Zabini's pool. Eleanor slipped a light cotton, grey, swinging dress over her high necked white bikini top and high waisted, floral bottoms. She slipped her feet into two strapped sandals and sprayed her face with a Muggle product Hermione had recommended for keeping makeup on. It surely wouldn't be as effective as a charm would have been, but seeing as they weren't at school Eleanor would have to make do. Her brown hair was getting long and was rather easily tangled. She hadn't gotten it cut in a long time, and it was starting to hang very low on her back. She never did anything with it, she just let it hang there around her face or tickling the back of her arms.

Draco swung his body into her room, leaning on the doorframe. He watched her for a moment, watching herself in the mirror. He could see the mild displeasure on her face as she wiped something from the corner of her eye and flattened the sleeves of her dress against her shoulders.

"You almost ready?" Draco asked, his voice quiet as it travelled through the cool air of her bedroom. Eleanor looked over at him and offered a shy smile.

"Just about." She returned lowly as stepped away from the mirror. She decided at the last minute to at least pin her hair back a little, to offer something different than her normal, hanging hair. She pulled pins from a small container that sat on the nightstand and began to section off a piece of her thick, wavy, brown hair. She was aware of Draco watching her. It didn't make her uncomfortable so much as nervous. She was afraid that if he looked for too long, he would realize she was not quite so beautiful as he seemed to believe and would leave her for one of the Greengrass sisters. "I'll grab you when I'm ready." Eleanor told him, shifting uncomfortably on her feet. Draco nodded once, though Eleanor couldn't see, and slipped back into his room.

He could tell she was nervous, he couldn't place about what. She had been frustratingly distant the closer school got. He was wracking his brain wondering if this was the way it always had been and if he had gotten used to their intimacy in the early weeks of summer, or if she was pulling away. He couldn't understand it, she was angry with him for doing the same thing at the beginning of the summer. He felt like a fool, she made him feel like that a lot.

Draco took some deep breaths and reminded himself that she was about to walk into a party filled with people she didn't know or particularly like. That was what was most likely causing her nerves to be on edge. He sat in his room and flicked through a book about rare plants for potions that Eleanor had brought home for him a week earlier. It was a little slow, he had to admit, he wasn't a fan of Herbology, and he knew that Eleanor knew that and was hoping to pique his interest in it by using potions. She liked to do that, to take care of him in weirdly subtle ways that she didn't think he would understand, but he did.

Eleanor's stomach was in knots, she worried about the people, she worried about what they would say about her last drunken experience at the Zabini home, she worried they would all be talking about Sirius Black, she worried she would hear some sort of information on Voldemort. Would she tell the Order if she had? Was she only protecting Draco, or was she protecting Draco's friends too? Was she only protecting Harry, Ron and Hermione, or was she protecting the entire Order? She didn't know, she had no idea where her morals started and where they ended.

She tried to shake the nerves from her shoulders. She pulled her eyes away from the mirror. With all of the other things she had to worry about, she had to force her looks to not be one of them. She turned off the lights in her bedroom and bathroom, she grabbed any overnight essentials that she would need to drop off at her home, where her and Draco would undoubtedly stay, before heading to Blaise's.

Eleanor left her room in a sweep and bumped into Lucius Malfoy, a face she had not seen since her parent's memorial.

"Lucius," Eleanor let out in surprise. He looked the same as always, Eleanor almost expected him to look disheveled, though she wasn't sure why. "How are you?"

Upon seeing Eleanor, a wild look flared in Lucius' eyes for a fraction of a moment. Eleanor could only barely see it, see the emotions he was easily able to hide. He was unsure of how to look at her, the pride and joy of his dearest friends, without feeling an extreme amount of guilt clutch at his chest. He knew she wasn't theirs, not biologically. But she somehow still looked like them, he still saw her as the spitting image of Olga and Darius even though she hadn't a drop of their blood coursing through her veins.

"It's been a busy summer." Lucius conceded. "Going out?" He questioned. Eleanor's thick eyebrows knitted together at his brief response, he noticed her confusion.

"Draco and I were going to head over to the Zabini's for the evening." Eleanor confided, unsure if she should have told him where they were actually going. Lucius nodded once. A desperate look appeared in Eleanor's eyes, like she wanted more from him. "Lucius, could I ask you a favor?" Her voice timid. Lucius raised his eyebrows, waiting for her request. "There has been no information on my parents and how they died all summer. I … it's really difficult for me to fully grieve them if I don't know why I am doing it." Eleanor sighed a little, looking at her sandal-clad feet. "I don't know if there is anyway you could hustle along the process. I know you have a lot of influence in the Ministry, and I just … I need answers." Eleanor spilled out.

Lucius' first instinct was to get defensive, to interrogate her on how she knew that he would be able to find out the information on her. He wanted to stick with the story that had been crafted, or rather the lack of story. Consistency was key in this situation. But her wide blue eyes that he had seen at all ages of life, and the fact that she somehow looked _just like them _caused him to let out a sigh of defeat. "I'll see what I can do." He murmured with a swift nod, then swept away from her quickly without a look back.

The guilt would eat away at him knowing that he could not doing anything, knowing that he knew exactly what had happened and he would not give her answers.


	14. Chapter 14

The moment Eleanor stepped out of the Floo and into the Zabini Mansion she felt suffocated. There were so many people. Eleanor wondered how Blaise knew this many people. There was the entirety of the Slytherin House it seemed, and the majority of Ravenclaw, some Hufflepuff, though not many, and even a few Gryffindors, however all were long graduated.

"What are these people doing at a party thrown by a fifth year?" Eleanor asked Draco, confused as to why 20 year old Gryffindor's would be chatting and drinking with 15 and 16 year old Slytherins.

"You know how these things get, someone invites a friend, who invites an older brother, who invites their friends. If this is too much-"

"Too much?" Eleanor asked with a laugh. "You always seem to forget what house I'm in." Draco raised his brows at her, guiding them to the dining room where the 12 person table was completely covered in bottles of alcohol. Eleanor's eyes lit up, and Draco laughed when he saw her reaction. She reached quickly for a bottle of clear liquid and grabbed two shot glasses off the table. She handed one to Draco and poured them both a hefty amount.

"Cheers." She said, bumping her small glass against his and downing the burning liquid in one smooth gulp. She winced a little as the drink hit the back of her throat and shook her head making a noise of disgust. Draco was much more nonchalant, Eleanor barely even realized his glass was emptied until she saw that no more than a drop resided in it. Eleanor quickly took another before grabbing a cold bottle and walking through the large house.

"Eleanor and Draco!" A pair of arms wrapped around the shoulders of both mentioned parties. Eleanor smiled at the drunk host.

"Hello Blaise." She greeted, leaning into him slightly as a makeshift hug.

"So good to see my favorite little drunk again." Blaise laughed, the smell of alcohol that radiated off of him almost got Eleanor intoxicated. She chuckled with him good naturedly.

"Quite the turn out." Draco noted.

"Ah, yeah." Blaise observed the room proudly. "I got word from mum and dad yesterday, first time in nearly 2 weeks, they will be returning in a few days. Just enough time to ship me off to school."

"So you are going to trash the place and drink all the liquor?" Draco questioned as a vaguely familiar 6th year Ravenclaw boy spilled a mixed drink on a rug that he was sure was older and more precious than Salazar Slytherin himself.

"Naturally." Blaise responded, nodding in approval at the growing mess that was his home. "I'll catch up with you two later." Blaise said suddenly, catching sight of Marietta Edgecomb, and Eleanor was sure the pair were only minutes away from finding a private corner of the home.

"Ah, classic Slytherin angst." Eleanor mused jokingly. Draco was about to question her comment when she left his side to greet the Greengrass sisters. Draco was unsure how he felt about his two worlds colliding; his housemates and Eleanor. He wanted to entertain the idea of being this open to Eleanor's housemates but shook the mere thought of it from his head so quickly that he could barely even think their names.

Draco hovered behind Eleanor for a moment as she talked with Daphne and Astoria, feeling slightly uncomfortable, and taking a long drink from his cup.

"Hi Draco." Astoria said meekly. Draco noticed the younger girl slowly nursing a cup of wine. She looked more out of place than Eleanor did. He almost felt for the girl, she felt the need to babysit her questionable older sister, or perhaps she was here by choice. Draco had no clue why she was here.

"Hi Astoria." Draco greeted with a tight smile. He wanted to pull Eleanor close like he had gotten used to doing but knew that they had both agreed to not let anyone know about their relationship.

"It's a shame we never cross paths at school." Draco heard Daphne say to Eleanor, as she put a hand on Eleanor's shoulder. The Slytherin girl had given Eleanor another drink and had earlier been prompting her to drink faster in order to "catch up" with the rest of the party. Draco could have laughed out loud when he saw brief, but wild, annoyance flash in Eleanor's eyes.

"We have most classes together, Daphne." Eleanor pointed out. "I've known you since we were toddlers. If we wanted to talk at school, we would."

Daphne was taken aback for a moment, but was on the edge of being severely drunk and also adored party Eleanor so she recovered quickly. "I meant that it's a shame that we don't talk."

Draco could sense that Eleanor wanted to continue to argue, like she would have done with him, but she took a deep breath and seemed to realize that Daphne wasn't Draco, so she just smiled and nodded. "We should change that this year."

"Yes!" Daphne agreed enthusiastically. "Especially now that I know you are so much fun."

"Now that you know?" Eleanor inquired. "What did you think before?"

"Everyone just thought Draco was secretly indebted to you or something and that's why he would spend time with you. Like a sex slave or something." Daphne laughed, taking two shots out of the hands of passersby and handing one to Eleanor, who downed it and one of the drinks in her hands quickly. "Obviously now that we know you, we know that isn't true. You're cool, Draco is just super not a fan of your friends or your house."

"Daphne." Astoria scolded her sister, giving her a menacing look. "You aren't supposed to say that." Draco's heart was pounding in anger at Daphne and how she felt the need to butt into their business, and also reveal the extent of his hatred for who Eleanor surrounded herself with.

"No, it's alright." Eleanor waved off, unusually cool and collected. "I know Draco hates my friends and all Gryffindors. It was pretty mutual until I got to know you all. Funny how that happens." Her voice was friendly and joking, leaving Daphne extremely confused on what to think about what she said. "I'm going to go find Jenny." Eleanor leaned forward to hug Daphne and Astoria before wading through a sea of people.

Draco struggled to keep up with her. He eventually followed her into the quiet kitchen. There were a few House Elves who scurried away at the sight of them. The music was muffled in there and Eleanor pushed herself against the counter.

"I'm-" Draco started, not sure what he was supposed to say about that interchange.

"Don't apologize Draco." Eleanor held up her hand quickly. "I know you hate my friends. They hate you too." Eleanor let out before quickly adding, "No offense."

"None taken." Draco brushed off, looking closely at Eleanor and trying to decipher her emotions. He wanted to think he was getting better, but she still left him just as clueless as always. "I'm sorry your friends and I don't get along."

"Draco, that doesn't bother me anymore. Not even the fact that we don't really see each other at school. I was offended and scared earlier this summer but, I don't know, I'm just not anymore. I get it. I mean, not really, I don't understand why you hate each other so much, but I get that you do and that can't just be undone for my sake."

"Then I just don't understand why you are upset." Draco sighed, leaning forward to put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm not." Eleanor shook her head quickly. Draco gave her an unconvinced look in response. "Truly, I'm not."

"Okay, I believe you." Draco nodded, though he didn't. "What's all this about?" Draco asked, gesturing to the kitchen around her, and the fact that she had to escape to here minutes after entering the party.

"I don't know, I just…" Eleanor trailed. "Why are we friends with such annoying people?" Draco laughed and wrapped an arm around Eleanor's shoulders. "Maybe the alcohol hasn't hit me yet, that's when I can tolerate it."

"Is that really what's the matter?" Draco pressed.

"I'm just thinking about how I'm going to miss hanging out with you like this at school." Eleanor shrugged, finally being truthful. "It doesn't bother me that you don't get along with my friends. I only really like your friends when it is Blaise or when I am drunk. I just know I'm going to miss this." Eleanor put her head on his shoulder.

"It doesn't have to be a huge secret." Draco let out quietly, shocking himself as the words left his mouth.

"Everyone already thinks you're my sex slave." Eleanor laughed against him.

"I'm serious." Draco said, surprising himself even further. He didn't want to open Eleanor or himself to ridicule, but his friends liked Eleanor. They obviously adored her the same way he did. They wouldn't be cruel to her, or to him for the way he felt about her. They wouldn't have to sneak around. Eleanor snorted at the thought. "What?"

"I just thought for months that those words are the only things I ever wanted to hear you say. And now that you've said them, I've realized how ridiculous it is."

"Ridiculous?" Draco asked.

"It's my friends, they are so angry with you all of the time." Eleanor sighed, not planning on mentioning the Order and their, or more accurately, Sirius' want to use Eleanor as some Malfoy mole.

"Angry with me?"

"Can you blame them?" Eleanor wondered. "You were a huge dick all of last year during the Triwizard Tournament, and only a little less so every year before that. Even when Hermione found out, she was extremely disappointed in me. Having Hermione being disappointed and annoyed with whoever you are currently with is literal hell because she is so intelligent that any argument against them makes sense." Eleanor began to ramble.

"You told Granger?" Draco asked for clarification, he was pretty positive they had agreed to keep it quiet.

"She found out." Eleanor sighed.

"How?" Draco wanted to know.

"You aren't exactly subtle with leaving _evidence _all over my neck." Eleanor rolled her eyes and kissed him swiftly on the lips.

"Are you complaining?" Draco chuckled.

"Not necessarily, maybe just for future reference, make it less visible."

"Okay, we can practice later." Draco whispered huskily in Eleanor's ear, causing her to giggle and wrap her arms around him.

"Please be patient with my friends, and with me." Eleanor asked quietly. "I appreciate that you're willing to be open about it, but they are complicated."

Draco understood, though he was a little annoyed that when he was ready, she suddenly wasn't. He knew that she was worth being patient for, but it wasn't one of his strong suits.

The two left the kitchen a few moments later and were able to fully enjoy the party. Intoxicated, and if only for a night, carefree.

* * *

About a week later, Eleanor locked up her home, packed up her room and even took a few photos off the walls to bring with her to school. She Floo'd to Malfoy Manor with a tear in her eye as she said goodbye to her beloved home for the next few months.

She rode with the Malfoy's to King's Cross, asked Lucius about what he had found out at the Ministry and held Draco's hand silently across the backseat of the cab when it was revealed that he had nothing to share. Narcissa saw the contact between the two teenagers and tried not to smirk, but she felt a tear grow in her eyes thinking of her dear best friend, and how they had had a running poll to see whether the two would fall in love. As always, Olga was right.

Lucius and Narcissa walked the pair into the train station. Narcissa hugged both parties privately, Draco would have never been hugged in front of his friends, she learned this very early on in his Hogwarts career. Lucius was emotionless, as he always was, as he shook his son's hand and gave Eleanor a slight nod.

"Lucius," Eleanor grabbed his hand before he walked away, taking the older man by surprise, "you'll write, won't you? If you find anything out?" Lucius pulled his arm out of her grip and looked at her in silence for a moment, his dark eyes hard. Eleanor wondered for a moment how him and Draco could be of the same blood. How could Draco be, deep down, a truly good and warm person while Lucius was so unfeeling?

"If anything were to show itself, you would be the first to know." He confirmed, though his voice was distant and cold. Eleanor nodded once and turned away from him, not feeling a sense of security in his promise.

The pair faced the train that symbolized the culmination of all their fears and anxieties regarding the coming school year, their friends and their budding relationship. Eleanor looked at the cars all lined up and wondered what was to happen now. She wanted to reach out and hold Draco's hand but she didn't. Her fingers seemed to ache with the denial of contact between them.

"Well, here we are." Eleanor let out. She saw Draco nod from the corner of her eye.

"I have to go to the Prefect carriage for a meeting." Draco stated.

"Ron and Hermione will be there." Eleanor put in, though she didn't know why. Draco wanted to make a smart remark about his dislike for the pair, but visibly bit the inside of his cheek. Eleanor's heart fell a bit at the dawning of this new reality for them. A mutual dislike for the other's life, the disconnect. "I'll walk with you there." Eleanor suggested. Draco nodded once, picking up his bag and entering the train with Eleanor right behind him. She was unable to walk next to him in the crowded walkways, but it was still a pleasant sentiment. It was rather quiet outside of the Prefect's carriage. Draco made a move to open the door but Eleanor stopped him briefly. "Can we meet up tonight? Before curfew?"

Draco's eyes softened for a moment, he knew that she was probably more afraid than he was of what was going to happen this year. She had already lost so much and there were so many factors going against them. But he couldn't bring himself to feel hope for their future, no matter how much she consumed his mind. "I might have Prefect duties." He reasoned.

"You won't give me detention, will you?" Eleanor joked softly, a smirk playing on her lips that made Draco consider finding an empty compartment and spending the entire train ride interlocked with her. It was all he really wanted to do.

"Pansy'll be there." He whispered. Eleanor's smirk fell as she shifted on her feet and dropped her gaze. He missed her eyes and felt horrible already, he had a feeling this would be a rather consistent occurrence throughout the year. "I'll see if I can ditch her. Meet outside the library?"

Eleanor lit up with a smile and nodded rapidly at this. "I'll see you then." Her heart filled at the thought of being able to spend time with him, hoping this effort would last. "Have a good meeting."

Eleanor searched the compartments for a while before coming to Harry. "Hello there." She smiled pleasantly as she entered. Harry helped her lift her trunk onto the rack before the pair sat across from each other. It hadn't been long since Eleanor had visited, so there wasn't too much to catch up on.

"I have to admit, I'm a little surprised at how easily they let you in on the Order." Harry said with a bit of a bitter undertone. "I didn't even know about it until I was expelled from Hogwarts."

"Probably strategic." Eleanor shrugged, sending a comforting smile to her friend. "I'm closely connected to the Malfoys, they are under suspicion currently."

"They aren't trying to use you." Harry defended softly. "They must have just trusted you easier than me." He sighed a little. Eleanor only knew through Hermione the turmoil that Harry was facing. He was being handled like a ticking time bomb back at the Order, he was fragile.

"I don't think it had to do with that." Eleanor shook her head. "I kind of forced Hermione to show it to me." She chuckled a little, hoping to prompt Harry to laugh with her.

"Why?"

Eleanor took a deep breath, contemplating if she should let Harry know what no one else knew. She felt like she was betraying Draco by telling Harry first, but she knew that Harry would be more accepting and understanding of the information, and she knew that Harry needed to trust as well as be trusted in hopes of feeling valued by her and with her. "Well, I haven't told anyone about this yet. Not even Hermione, or Draco." Eleanor paused briefly. "I found out earlier this summer that Remus is my biological father." Saying those words out loud felt almost revolutionary for Eleanor. She hadn't really said them before. It felt odd, telling someone who her father was when she had been accepting condolences all summer for him. It felt nice though, it felt like she was affirming to herself that she wasn't as alone as she thought. "When Hermione told me she had seen him recently, I don't know, I had to go see him."

Harry puzzled for a moment, analyzing Eleanor, her face, her mannerisms. He met her parents briefly a few times on Platform 9 ¾ and she always seemed to be just like them. But seeing her now, with this information, he could see Lupin in her. He could see a similarity in looks and demeanor. He noticed their obvious mutual admiration for each other.

"They didn't accept me into the Order, Harry. They accepted me as a daughter of their friend."

* * *

**Quick Note: **Alrighty so we are officially en route to Hogwarts! How do you all think this year is going to go for Eleanor? I've got some pretty big plans up my sleeve that I'm working on for the future of this story, and I'm so excited to keep sharing!


	15. Chapter 15

**Quick Note: **And we are officially back at Hogwarts! I'm excited to show some relationships we haven't seen a lot of yet, and I'm really looking forward to how you react to how some relationships change and grow! Let me know what you think!

* * *

Sitting in the Great Hall felt surreal to Eleanor. She was pressed up between Ron and Fred, sitting across from Hermione, Harry and Ginny. She was laughing at something the twins had said, her stomach was full of delicious food and she was among friends. It felt good, she felt safe.

That is, until a stout woman dressed in pink asked for the attention of the Hogwarts population. Her voice unsettled Eleanor and set her teeth on edge.

"She was at my hearing." Harry whispered to the group quietly.

"Have you ever met her, Eleanor?" Ron asked softly, nudging Eleanor's arm. Eleanor wrinkled her nose in disgust at the thought of having previously known this woman.

"Why would I ever know her?" Eleanor responded incredulously.

"I don't know. You're the only high class Slytherin we are friendly with. I just figured you would know other high class Slytherins." Ron reasoned with a shrug.

"I'm not Slytherin." Eleanor rolled her eyes at her redheaded friend, who drove her mad more often than not.

"As close as we can get." Ron continued. "You spent your whole summer bunked up with one and all of his cronies."

"No, I don't know this woman, Ron." Eleanor sighed, furrowing her brow trying to listen to what this woman could possibly _still _be talking about. "This seems like a load of shit." Eleanor said quietly to the twins in front of her, both of whom nodded in agreement.

Eleanor stopped listening to the woman, she hadn't been paying much attention to begin with. Defense teachers never lasted, and Eleanor was sure that this woman would be no different. She could not possibly be worse than a Death Eater in disguise, or an egotistical liar, or Voldemort himself. Eleanor shook the woman's shrill voice from her head as they were dismissed from their tables. Eleanor's stomach was full, and she was around friends, and the change of scenery was something she greatly appreciated. In her bones, it felt good to be back at Hogwarts.

The Weasley twins did not disappoint back in the Gryffindor common room. The had been working tirelessly all summer for this night; the perfect time to showcase their best creations. Naturally, they had smuggled a few alcoholic beverages with them. Eleanor was always mystified as to how they were able to get so much into the castle walls.

Fred and George passed around different treats for their housemates to try as Hermione, Eleanor, Harry and Ron all sipped on their drinks in the corner of the common room. Fred and George didn't announce to too many people that they were handing out alcohol, they wanted to keep it lucrative.

"We shouldn't even have these." Hermione said to Ron. "It feels very hypocritical." But she took another sip despite her words. "As Prefects we would be confiscating these. If anyone were to tell…"

"Hermione, do you need another to calm down?" Eleanor asked with a laugh. "There is barely any alcohol in these drinks anyway." Eleanor reasoned, looking at the bottles of cider. Hermione huffed.

"Just the idea of it. It's so wrong now that I'm a Prefect."

"Blimey, Hermione." Ron groaned. "You don't have to drink it."

"More for me." Eleanor laughed. Hermione looked at her friend quizzically. All four of them had been open to having good times last year at the appropriate times, especially given the Tournament. Hermione had never seen Eleanor want to drink simply for the sake of doing so. It was the night before classes, and it wasn't a party, not really.

"A little bird told me that you made an appearance at several Slytherin only parties this summer." George said as he and his brother joined the group in the corner. He nudged Eleanor's shoulder and she laughed a little. She was by no means drunk, but after a few casual drinks she was beginning to feel more giggly than she normally would have been.

"Obviously I wasn't at a "Slytherin only" party if I, a Gryffindor, was there." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "But yes, Blaise Zabini had a few get togethers that I attended."

"It sounded like you more than attended them. I heard you truly were the life of the party." George continued to joke, causing Eleanor to turn red in memory of her dancing and singing unsolicitedly in Blaise Zabini's pool in front of a frighteningly small group of people.

"Where did you hear this?" Eleanor asked, wanting to know which party guest was already telling all of Hogwarts exactly how Eleanor couldn't handle her alcohol - which was a lie, or so Eleanor liked to believe.

"Marietta. She blabs and blabs constantly." George sounded annoyed.

"When were you talking to Marietta?" Eleanor blinked in surprise, having never seen the two interact before.

"We spoke briefly on the train." George explained with humor and pride in his eye.

"Yes, they _spoke _very briefly." Fred emphasized, nudging his twin with a laugh.

"You aren't telling me that you-" Hermione started to scold with humor.

"Oh come on, Hermione. Only a little bit." George seemed proud of his escapade on the train.

"What a floozie." Eleanor muttered to herself, thinking of how only days before she had seen Marietta and Blaise interlocked in several corners of the Zabini household.

"Well that hurts my feelings a little." George covered his heart with his hand, only a little truth hiding underneath his jokes. Eleanor cracked half of a smile.

"She has been entertaining Blaise Zabini as recently as his end of summer party last week." Eleanor explained. "Sorry to burst your bubble."

"I don't talk to her much. Nothing to burst." George shrugged, though his pride was obviously a little hurt.

"Yeah, not anymore." Ron laughed, earning himself a hearty shove from his older brother.

Hermione let out a huge yawn then and looked at the clock on the wall. "I should probably be off." She handed her barely touched bottle to Fred's open hand. "Eleanor, are you coming up soon?" Hermione desperately wanted to talk to Eleanor privately about what exactly she had been up to that summer.

Eleanor nodded falsely. "Just let me finish this." She lifted her half drank bottle. Hermione left up the stairs.

"Oi, there's Seamus. Reckon we should go say hello?" Ron suggested, tapping Harry's arm. The two boys left and with their disappearance, Eleanor stood quickly and began walking to the portrait hole before anyone would notice.

"Where do you think you're going?" Fred asked with a raised brow.

"I'm going to go make sure Marietta gets what is coming to her." Eleanor smirked as she ducked out of the common room and into the dark hallway. Muscle memory and vague lighting took her to the library where she saw Draco waiting for her in an alcove.

"Ditch Pansy?" Eleanor smiled at him as she approached.

"It wasn't our night to do rounds." Draco shook his head, trying to fight the urge to begin bouncing like a lovesick pup when he saw her. He remained calm, collected. Which he thought made him seem dapper, but it disappointed Eleanor, who had hoped he would have been at least a little more excited to see her.

"So we could both get in trouble if we're caught?" Eleanor raised a thick eyebrow high on her face. Draco chuckled a little, feeling as though he wanted to hold her hand, but fought the urge for fear of coming across as desperate and attached.

"Let's just not get caught." Draco suggested.

"That's kind of hot." Eleanor giggled, finally making the move to touch him by wrapping her arm around his neck and pressing her lips to his gently at first, then pushing against them fiercely. She hadn't been able to get over the feeling of them together like that.

"Have you been drinking?" Draco pulled away, laughing at the taste and smell of subtle alcohol on her breath. Eleanor rolled her eyes.

"Only a little. I'm not drunk." Eleanor promised, and she wasn't, but her cheeks her rosy and she was very affectionate and began giggling a little more.

"Unbelievable." Draco chuckled, shaking his head and pulling her close again. He wouldn't dare think about his affections for Eleanor, but in reality, with or without Draco's acknowledgement of them, they were growing by the minute. He had never felt so drawn to someone - well, he had, but that someone had always, in one sense or another, been Eleanor. He didn't know what to do with himself. For some reason, he felt the need to pull away from her lips as she looked up at him in confusion.

"Something wrong?" She asked, tilting her head. Merlin, she was adorable. "Do you want to talk?"

_Yes_, Draco thought to himself. He never really wanted to just talk with girls, but with Eleanor he did. She was his best friend, who he happened to love snogging every chance he could. What did that make her? All of those feelings, _romantic _feelings, sent Draco reeling. He couldn't really be feeling the way he was, he had never felt this strongly. Part of him wanted to tell her, but part of him, the real part of him, felt like it was almost fake. The likelihood of a mutual affection where everything worked out was slim to none. So instead of talking about how he was feeling, instead of letting Eleanor in like he desperately needed to do, instead of figuring out his emotions and misconceptions, he simply shook his head and kissed her again with a ferocity that he believed would make him forget that he was enamored.

* * *

"It was probably some sort of power move." Eleanor reasoned, trying to keep up with a seething Harry after he had been issued a detention in their first class period with Professor Umbridge. "She wanted to assert dominance, you know? Maybe she thought that if she gave a detention the first day, students wouldn't mess with her."

"Or maybe some people are just bad people, Eleanor." Ron jabbed with an annoyed roll of his eyes. "There isn't always an explanation; some people are mean, or a raging bitch, or a Death Eater." His undertone was angry and frustrated, causing Eleanor to slow her pace and drop her eyes.

"I didn't say she wasn't out of line." Eleanor shook her head, trying to not be discouraged by the obvious frustrations of her friends. "I don't think she has it out for you, Harry. I don't think the Ministry is conspiring against you. You're paranoid."

"Merlin, Eleanor, are you fucking joking?" Ron finally yelled as the four turned down an empty corridor on their way back to the common room. "Have you even looked at a Prophet all summer? It's filled with smears against Harry."

"They haven't investigated the right sources" Eleanor was trying to be reasonable, trying to be positive. "They are misinformed."

"By the Ministry!" Ron called out, his long arms flailing in desperation for his naive friend to understand. "You're telling me that you don't think the Ministry is even a little bit seedy? Your parents died in their building, they are doing the autopsy and have found literally no cause of death. Not one. That's worth a conspiracy itself."

"Ron," Hermione scolded her friend, shooting him a hard glare at the mention of Eleanor's deceased parents.

"They aren't efficient. My parents weren't people of interest for anybody, their deaths don't need to be covered up." Eleanor shot back defensively, not wanting the situation with her parents to even become a talking point.

"Inefficient? You have grounds to launch an entire investigation into the legitimacy of countless Departments, but you think they are just inefficient. Unbelievable, truly." Ron scoffed, rubbing his forehead in incredulity. "Let me ask you this, do you even believe You-Know-Who is back?" He finally asked point blank, staring at Eleanor with hard, unflinching eyes.

"What has that got to do with anything?" Eleanor furrowed her brows. She had honestly not given it much thought, her mind was elsewhere over the summer. She trusted Harry, she trusted the Order, but was trust the same as belief?

"Ron," Hermione warned again, hitting his shoulder, "Of course she does. You've no right to question-"

"Then let her answer, 'Mione." Ron's eyes still hadn't left Eleanor, who felt very attacked and didn't want this. She just wanted her friends to try to see the whole picture and envision other scenarios where they weren't the victims.

"Harry," Hermione looked to her friend for support as Eleanor stood, silent as the grave.

"I mean, you don't believe me about Malfoy..." Harry let out lamely, not making eye contact with Eleanor as he said it.

"That's different." Eleanor shook her head rapidly.

"Well why would you believe his entire account of the night, but not that one part?" Ron inquired. Eleanor felt like she was put on the stand.

"How would you react if Harry told you your uncle was a Death Eater?" Eleanor shot back. She didn't want to argue with Ron, it was never pretty when they did.

"I'd same 'damn, didn't see that coming, that's a right shame, guess I won't see him at Christmas anymore,' and then never speak to him again." Ron retorted quickly. Eleanor groaned and rolled her eyes, she knew Ron and she knew that he was loyal to a fault but was never sure who to be loyal to so if that situation were to arise, he would be conflicted between Harry and his family.

"I believe you Harry, I do." Eleanor finally answered, looking at her friend. Harry opened his mouth to respond but Ron beat him to it.

"So you believe that Malfoy is a Death Eater?" Ron hopped on quickly.

"I don't -" Eleanor wasn't allowed to finish.

"Merlin's fucking Beard, Eleanor. You're brainwashed!" He yelled loudly.

"Oi, Weasley!" The four heard a sharp voice snap as a blonde head rounded around the corner with Blaise. "Yelling in the halls loses you house points." He warned through gritted teeth. He wasn't sure what the context was that cause Ron to yell at Eleanor, but he knew that he wouldn't stand by while it happened.

"Piss off, Malfoy." Ron grumbled, turning to walk away.

"Tsk tsk." Draco tutted. "I'm afraid I can't just let you go. You're disrupting the learning environment, I might have to issue a detention."

"Draco, stop it." Eleanor hissed at him. Ron was out of line, but she didn't need Draco to come and give him more of a reason to think she was some sort of traitor to Harry. At her words, Draco's eyes shifted to Eleanor. He was confused and a little annoyed that she didn't seem at least a little bit thankful. Her so called friends were yelling at her in the corridor for some probably ridiculous reason. Did she not want his help?

"You can't talk to me like that, I'm a prefect you know." Draco tried to layer his voice in a veiled joke in hopes of making Eleanor crack a smile at his arrogance. She would have if it was two days earlier.

"I'm perfectly aware, thank you." Eleanor rolled her eyes and began to turn away from him.

"Okay, seriously, why were you being such a dick to her, Weasley?" Draco demanded angrily, frustrated that Eleanor wasn't playing along and still not being enlightened on why he witnessed her being yelled at so mercilessly.

"I'm the dick?" Ron asked incredulously, his fist curled tightly as he began to position himself to hit the Slytherin.

"Ron, stop it." Eleanor snapped loudly and harshly. The redheaded boy looked over to her and rolled his eyes.

"Protecting a Malfoy from what he deserves," Ron scoffed quietly, turning to walk away, Harry following closely behind him, "fucking typical." He shook his head. Hermione lingered a moment, asking Eleanor with her eyes if she should stay. Eleanor shook her head slightly, and Hermione went following the two boys. Blaise understood immediately and left.

Eleanor was seething from the past events with both Ron and Draco. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms.

"What did he mean by that?" Draco asked in a softer tone than what he had previously been using, but not an altogether pleasant one. He leaned beside her on the wall, hoping to gain answers and insight.

"Nothing." Eleanor huffed, looking away.

"Why won't you talk to me?" Draco pressed.

"Because I'm mad at you." Eleanor snapped.

"Then why are you still here?" Draco hoped to catch her off guard with this question, forcing her to come clean. But Eleanor always had something to say to him.

"Because I want you to know." She returned without missing a beat. To her surprise (she was always finding herself surprised) Draco laughed. He actually laughed. Not a mean laugh that showed frustration or an ironic laugh, but a real laugh. "What's funny?" Eleanor sniffed angrily.

"You." Draco answered with a shrug. "You think I don't know that you're angry. You just like to stick around to really make me feel your anger?"

"I don't find that particularly funny."

"No, of course you don't." Draco continued to chuckled quietly for a bit. "Why are you friends with them if they treat you like that?"

"They don't treat me 'like that', Draco." Eleanor explained. "We disagree on something, and Ron is very passionate and I remain unmoved."

"It sounded like more than that." Draco pressed further now that she wasn't trying to stay angry to prove a point.

"Well, it wasn't." Eleanor stated simply. "Just drop it." She pushed away from the wall, and Draco leaned forward slightly for a stolen kiss in the empty corridor, but Eleanor brushed right passed him without a second thought.


	16. Chapter 16

**Quick Note: **Hi all! I hope you're enjoying the story, I'm enjoying hearing from all of you and continuing to plug away at finishing it up! You'll be able to tell that the next few chapters are going to start bouncing around quite a bit again just so we can get lots of glimpses of Hogwarts life - the good and the bad!

Let me know what you think!

* * *

Eleanor walked the long way to the common room to cool off and get her thoughts in order before facing her friends again. Her and Ron argued the most out of the four of them. It never came from a place of dislike, though sometimes it came across that way. Ron disliked the Malfoys and Eleanor loved them. They were both very proud and very unmoved on their opinions.

Upon her return to the common room, she decided to sit next to Ron and hopefully clear the air. He was sitting alone by the fireplace, neither Hermione nor Harry were in sight.

"Hey," Eleanor greeted softly, "can we talk?" Ron sighed and nodded in response. They both hated this part, admitting that in some sense, they were wrong. Eleanor wasn't very good at that.

"Look, I'm sorry that I went off on you." Ron let out. "I stand by everything I said, but I shouldn't have yelled at you."

Eleanor fought the urge to roll her eyes at him, but she knew that she was in no place to be judgemental given that she was very reluctant to admit any wrong on her end as well. "It's okay," Eleanor stated with a nod, "you have to know that I trust and believe Harry. I believe that You-Know-Who is back and I know that the way Lucius acted in the last war leaves his character up for question, but I have to stand by my parent's belief that he was a good friend; good enough to leave me with them." Eleanor cringed a little at the last part, because it was technically a lie. Her parents didn't leave her in the care of the Malfoys, this was partly due to her relationship with Remus but also because though good people at the base of it, Narcissa and Lucius stood on slightly unsteady moral grounds.

"How long have you and Malfoy been bunking up?" Ron asked suddenly. This question shocked Eleanor but she maintained her cool facade, not letting any emotions go to her face.

"I've been staying with them for most of the summer, you know that." Eleanor answered coolly, playing dumb. Ron rolled his eyes.

"You know what I mean." He huffed out, but not pressing; in her false naivety, he found his answer. He tried not to show his extreme annoyance with her, he figured she wouldn't be clinging to the claim of Lucius' innocence had her and Draco not been _with_ each other all summer. Ron wrinkled his nose at the thought.

"Oh, good, you've made up." Hermione sighed in relief as she appeared from the dormitory steps. "Harry's gone for a walk, he's a bit heated from Umbridge yet." Hermione explained to Eleanor as she sat on the arm of the overstuffed couch that Ron and Eleanor shared. "Any chance either of you would like to do some reading in the Courtyard? The weather is beautiful and it will be gone so soon." Hermione prodded. "We could get ahead on our class work."

"I'll pass." Ron leaned back on the sofa, placing his hands behind his head.

"Have something better to do with your time?" Hermione asked with two raised brows but a chuckle in her voice.

"I do stuff." Ron defended. "I'm meeting up with Fred and George." He said as the twins passed.

"Eh, sorry Ronny," George half apologized with a shrug.

"We've got other plans." Fred continued as the two seventh years continued walking by.

Ron's cheeks turned a bit red. "I meant later." He explained to Hermione and Eleanor who were giggling at him. "I was gonna go get some rest while everyone is out." He provided lamely as he turned toward his dorm and bounded up the stairs. Hermione and Eleanor chuckled to themselves as they gathered their books.

Upon arrival to the courtyard, Eleanor stripped off her robes and was wearing only a white button up and her black skirt. Hermione did the same. Eleanor tried to soak up as many rays as possible in the dying summer sun. She knew this luxury would all but disappear until next Spring and she intended to make the most of what little time she had left.

"Eleanor, can we please talk about what happened this summer?" Hermione asked, not even touching her book before prodding. Eleanor realized then that Hermione never intended to get ahead on homework, she just said that to dissuade Ron from joining. Hermione was nothing if not clever.

"Nothing happened." Eleanor shrugged, though the blush on her cheeks gave away her lie.

"Don't lie." Eleanor looked at the ground in shame at her friend's scolding.

"It doesn't matter." Eleanor half groaned as she began tugging at the end of her skirt. "It wasn't a romance or anything. It was … I don't know, it was nothing." She repeated. "There isn't much to talk about."

"So you have no feelings for him?" Hermione asked, aware of the huge possibility that her friend would continue to lie to her because of the general dislike for Draco Malfoy in the whole of Gryffindor House.

"I don't know what I feel, Hermione." Eleanor shot back. "Things are complicated now that we are at school. They were already complicated at home. And he - we, I mean - aren't very good at expressing our feelings."

"But you're still going to see him?" Hermione pressed.

"Yes, I'll see him, Hermione. We live in the same castle, we-"

"Eleanor, you know what I mean." Hermione snapped, getting annoyed with her friend's wordplay. Eleanor pulled her book out of her bag and remained quiet for a few moments.

"I probably will. I like spending time with him, even if he hates my friends and my friends hate him."

"He more than hates us, he tortures Harry." Hermione pointed out.

"Torture is a bit of a stretch." Eleanor rolled her eyes.

Hurt flashed across Hermione's face. It was disheartening to watch Eleanor know fully well that Draco mistreated her friends, but refusing to acknowledge that her own lack of action led to the continuation of Draco's behavior. It felt almost as though she was defending him. "Eleanor, he calls me a Mudblood." Hermione let out.

Eleanor felt guilt pull at her heart, she couldn't look at Hermione. Hermione was brave and strong and smart, she knew that she was above the gross label that was put on her. However, it still hurt her to hear it used to describe her.

"I've talked to him about it." Eleanor said quietly. "He's trying to be better." Hermione scoffed at her words, she didn't believe it for a second. "He is." Eleanor nodded.

"You're smart, Eleanor," Hermione said quietly. "You know what is best for you." Eleanor had a feeling that her and her best friend had very different ideas of what that actually was. "Okay, anyway, I would really like to hear about these parties you attended this summer."

Eleanor smiled at her friend. Things often felt too serious with the four friends. Understandably so, considering the tragedies and challenges they faced, but it was always refreshing to laugh about normal things. "Hermione, I embarrassed myself in front of Blaise Zabini's inner circle repeatedly this summer."

* * *

"This Defense homework is ridiculous," Eleanor muttered angrily as she scratched away on the parchment. Her and Draco had found an abandoned classroom to work on homework together away from prying eyes. They had tried to meet up after hours most nights, but Draco was getting more and more Prefect rounds, and they had to be more creative about their rendezvous. Unfortunately, that also meant focusing on homework rather than each other some days.

"Eh, it's not so bad." Draco shrugged nonchalantly. Eleanor rolled her eyes at him.

"Okay Mr. Essay Writer Extraordinaire." She mocked, shaking her head in annoyance. "Umbridge really commented on the last essay I turned in that it reads at a primary school level, and that my penmanship looked like a baby owl wrote it. Is she really that worried about my fucking penmanship? Aren't there more important things to worry about?"

"She is a bit particular." Draco let out reluctantly, his eyes not leaving his parchment, though he braced himself for whatever smart, annoyed comment Eleanor was surely about to make.

"You are about the biggest kiss ass I have ever met." Eleanor huffed. "She can't hear you, you know."

"I don't know, she seems to like me fine."

"Everyone likes you fine." Eleanor grumbled, throwing her quill done and crossing her arms in annoyance. In reality, Eleanor wasn't just struggling in Umbridge's class, she was struggling all over. She had never floundered in school before, but she had already been given rather poor marks in each class, and every professor had pulled her aside to speak about her falling grades. She was frustrated with herself, it seemed her brain couldn't keep up with the rigor she was used to.

"You know who the only person who I care about liking me is?" Draco put his homework aside to look charmingly at Eleanor, whose brow was creased angrily as she sat across the table from him.

"You're going to say me just because I'm in a bad mood, aren't you?" Eleanor quipped, causing Draco to chuckle as he sat up from his chair and made his way over to her, feeling bolder than he had in weeks now that they were truly alone in an abandoned classroom. He wanted to be able to woo her, to make her feel loved; without the prying eyes of every student of Hogwarts.

"For the record," Draco started while guiding Eleanor to her feet and promptly pinning her against the table. "I would say you even if you weren't in a bad mood."

"That's because you're a kiss ass." Eleanor chuckled, feeling her irritation melt away under Draco's touch. Her light laughter turned into a small gasp once he started kissing her neck. His hands ran over her body and suddenly Eleanor didn't care so much about Umbridge's essay. She didn't care so much about anything at all, except for Draco's hot mouth moving closer and closer to hers.

"I'm very confused, Ellie." Draco murmured softly into her lips. "Am I too prideful, or a kiss ass? You accuse me of both, and I think that being one means I can't be the other." Eleanor rolled her eyes at him and captured his cheeks in her hands to bring his lips back to her mouth and shut up his annoying chatter. The two moved together slowly, deeply. Eleanor's whole body shivered as she pressed up against him. Like a million little sparks every place their bodies were connected. He electrified her.

"I think either way, you talk too much," Eleanor retorted. Draco pulled away from her, his lips slightly swollen and a mischievous light twinkled in his eye.

"There are a few ways you can get me to shut up, you know?" He breathed lowly in her ear. Eleanor's breath hitched slightly as her body went warm, but she wouldn't let him know that. She still had to have the last word in their interchange. She always wanted that.

But she stared at his lips, pink and slightly wet, and thought about something she wanted more.

"Probably something scandalous," Eleanor quivered slightly, "something that will compromise my virtue."

"So overdramatic." Draco rolled his eyes at her and smiled. "Not compromise your virtue, possibly taint it."

"I can live with it being tainted." Eleanor joked, sliding herself onto the table behind her. Her bright blue eyes seemed to darken as she pulled Draco on top of her by the collar of his shirt. They stayed interlocked like that for a while. No words were exchanged, only heaving breaths, random skin to skin contact when their fingers found new flesh to cherish. Both always wanting slightly more than what they currently had.

"El," Draco finally breathed out, "would you want...uhh...would you want me to -" he cleared his throat, unsure of how to ask if she wanted what he wanted to do to her. All smoothness and charm escaped him in that moment, and Eleanor liked it. She leaned in and kissed him again, moving her lips slowly against his. She gave him a nod when she pulled away.

Draco was for a moment excited, then petrified, then both as he kissed down her body further and further.

* * *

Eleanor and her mother had always been Quidditch fans. Olga was remembered by former classmates as one of Slytherin's best Chasers until an impossibly bad cold caught in her 6th year during a game that ran late into a winter night left her incapable of playing her final year at Hogwarts. While she was sour her lungs wouldn't allow her to play, she still worked hard to instill a love of the sport in Eleanor. Eleanor was a terrible flyer at first and was too frustrated at Draco's talent to continue with her training. She was never as dedicated to getting good at things as Draco was.

Olga and Eleanor attended many Holyhead Harpies games throughout the years the two spent together. The main reason Olga refused to go to the Quidditch World Cup was because her dislike for Ireland was almost as strong as her dislike for Viktor Krum, who she ranted was "only famous because of his age and good looks, not his abilities," and that "Glynnis Griffiths was only a year older than Krum when she became the best Seeker of the age but she didn't get half the recognition that Krum did," and was "everything wrong with the patriarchal systems of Quidditch". All of which she denied saying when a lovestruck Hermione and fanatic turned arch nemesis Ron Weasley came to visit over winter break that year.

Eleanor smiled at the memories as she sat in the stands of the Quidditch Pitch watching the Slytherin vs Gryffindor game. It was Ron's first game as Keeper. Hermione was watching him closely, nervously. Similar to the way Eleanor was analyzing Draco's sharp drops and sudden turns with her heart in her throat. She wanted him to lose, no doubt about it, but she didn't want him to get hurt.

That was until she heard an unfamiliar song coming from the Slytherin stands. Hermione and her shared a look of utter disgust.

"I'm gonna kill him." Eleanor muttered darkly under her breath as she watched Harry dive for the snitch and get hit with bludger as he fell to the ground.

"You might not have to." Hermione whispered almost in humor. She pointed to Draco and Harry yelling and pointing at one another but both girls were shocked when Harry and the Twins charged at the blonde.

"You've got to be kidding me." Eleanor groaned. "Let's go." She ushered.

Eleanor flew down the steps in a blind rage. She had never been so furious with Draco. That song was abhorrent. Anyone who passed Eleanor on the stairwell would swear they saw steam coming out of her ears and red fires in her eyes. This was especially frightening because so few had been on the receiving end of her unfiltered anger. Often times her sadness or anxiety would manifest as irritation or a mild temper, but true anger was hard to solicit from Eleanor and was absolutely terrifying to witness.

The small crowd had left the Pitch by the time Eleanor made it down, but she wasted no time stalking into the Slytherin locker rooms, which were nearly emptied out by now, save for Crabbe and Nott saying nasty things to Draco about Professor McGonagall.

"This is the Slytherin locker room." Crabbe told her as she stalked down the hallway to the open room.

"Shut up, Crabbe." Eleanor hissed. A look of surprise passed over the faces of all three boys as Eleanor stood firmly with her arms crossed. "I'd like to speak to Draco for a moment if you are done gossiping, thanks." Eleanor smiled with no friendliness.

"Whatever." Crabbe rolled his eyes in dismissal but gathered his things and left with Nott all the same. Eleanor and Draco were alone in the dark space. Draco was drenched in sweat and had taken his jersey and undershirt off, leaving him topless and staring vacantly into his locker.

"What the hell was that?" Eleanor demanded.

"_They _attacked _me_." Draco raised his voice, turning to look at her. The vague pain in his eyes and the large bruise forming on his chin almost made Eleanor relent but the words of that horrible song played in her head again and her determined anger didn't decrease.

"I'm about to do the same." Eleanor snapped, her jaw set rigidly. "And I'm not talking about the fight."

A look of realization passed through Draco's eyes. "The song? You're here because of the fucking song?" He asked incredulously.

"Yes, I'm here because of the fucking song, you absolute imbecile." Eleanor took a step forward in an attempt to intimidate, though Draco still towered over her.

"I didn't tell them to sing it."

Eleanor scoffed loudly and ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "No, you only came up with the lyrics and taught it to the entirety of your house right before the first Quidditch match of the season."

"Why are you so sure it was me?" Draco mimicked her by crossing his arms over his chest and raising an argumentative eyebrow.

"The other culprits would be the other members of the Slytherin Quidditch team and all of them were dropped on their heads as infants and probably every day since. They can barely swing the damn bat, let alone make melodies and rhymes meant to humiliate others."

"Why do you even care?" Draco's voice rose in anger. "We aren't together, Eleanor. We agreed we could never be friends with each other's friends, so why pretend otherwise?"

"Why do I care?" Eleanor repeatedly lowly. Draco nodded. "I care because what you did was cruel and unnecessary. It's repulsive to me."

"Yeah?" Draco licked his lips in frustration and tried to ignore the pang of sadness that her words sent through him. "Would you care this much if it had been anyone besides Weasley?"

"Of course I would." Eleanor didn't know what he was insinuating with that ridiculous question.

"Really? You would storm down to my locker room for Susan Bones? Or Looney Lovegood? Or Pansy Parkinson?" Eleanor let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding, she knew in her heart she wouldn't have. "Didn't think so."

"Why does that matter?" Eleanor pressed. "Why is my anger any less valid because you were awful to one of my friends?"

"You were the one who decided we couldn't be together because of your friends!" Draco burst out. "You said that; you made that choice. Because of our conflict with each other's friends, you being my girlfriend was off the table. I don't care that you aren't my girlfriend, Eleanor, I really don't. But because you aren't my girlfriend, you don't get to be angry with me when I act the same way I did when I wasn't involved with you in any way."

"I don't _get _to?" Eleanor repeated for clarification. "You're telling me what I do and don't _get _to do now?" Eleanor had to laugh humorlessly for a moment. "Let's _get_ a thing or two straight here, Mr. Malfoy, I'm the only one who decides what I _get_ to do, and if I decide to _get_ angry with you for being the biggest prick inside this castle, then I _get_ to be mad at you for that. Similarly, if I decided that I _get_ to stop _getting_ you off in the Astronomy Tower because you are the biggest prick in the castle, then I _get_ to decide that too. Just like I _got_ to decide that I didn't want to be the girlfriend of someone who belittles my friends and countless others for sport. And I _get_ to decide if the way you act around me makes up for the way you act literally everywhere else - which, for the record, it currently doesn't. So now you _get_ to decide whether you want to start acting civilized or you can _get_ someone else to sit on their knees on the cold ground for you every other night to _get _you off while you whimper pathetically and dream up a song about Ronald Weasley."

With that, she left.

* * *

Eleanor was not proud of what transpired in the Slytherin locker room. She entirely lost her temper and was unproductive in moving towards a solution as well as holding various inappropriate acts that the two had partaken in above Draco's head. This was something else she wasn't proud of, and was not in any way modern or dignified.

Eleanor did not expect Draco to meet her in the Astronomy Tower later that night, but she hoped he would. She hoped he would want to handle things more maturely — or at least yell at her— enough to show up. Eleanor felt awful that he had gotten kicked off the Quidditch team. His heart and mind was centered in Quidditch and it was one of the only things that motivated him. He would spend hours on the Pitch practicing. Now he had no broom, nothing to occupy his mind.

Though she felt for him, she wasn't any less angry about the song, and now added what he had said about Mrs. Weasley and Mrs. Potter. Yes, she still wanted to yell at him, but she had to make sure he was alright first.

Eleanor wrung her hands together in quiet anticipation, waiting to hear footsteps ascending the stairs. She was about to go back to the common room when she eventually heard them. She held her breath until she saw the moonlight glimmering on a platinum blonde head.

"I didn't think you were going to come." Eleanor expressed to his blank face as she rushed towards him. Her tone was completely changed from earlier. Draco found quiet solace in this.

"I had a few things to say." Draco informed quietly, taking her hands in his.

"Me too," Eleanor rushed.

"El, do I _get _to speak?" Draco asked. Relief filled Eleanor's heart at the sound of his pet name for her and his quiet joke. She nodded.

"I just wanted to say that I shouldn't have yelled at you earlier." She spit out, still not letting Draco get his words out. "I mean, I'm still angry about what you did, and rightfully so, but I was furious before and I should have controlled my temper so our conversation could have been more productive." Eleanor was nearly out of breath for how fast she spoke, but she felt she needed to say it. "Okay, sorry. Go ahead." She paused for a moment. "Oh, and I really shouldn't have made all of those comments about getting you off, I do that because I want to and not because I feel like I deserve something for it." She added quickly. "Alright, now I'm done."

Draco took a deep breath and tried not to crack a smile at her antics. "You were right earlier, loud and uncharacteristically callous, but you were right. I shouldn't have done that, I know how much it hurts you when I act like that. I'm trying to get better, I am. And I don't want you to think that just because you aren't my girlfriend that I'm just using you to get off in secret around the castle. I really like you, Ellie. I want to be more like you, but I don't know, you know me. I'm not like you and it's hard for me to be kind and gentle." Draco sighed deeply.

"You're always kind and gentle with me." Eleanor lifted his chin so their eyes met.

"You're easy. You're…" _perfect, _Draco wanted to say but let out a puff of breath and rested his forehead on Eleanor's. "You're good." He supplied lamely. Though he had an extensive vocabulary and deep feelings for Eleanor, all he could give her without fear of scaring her away was 'good'. He felt any sense of charm melt away at the sight of her.

"If you can't manage kind and gentle with everyone, can you try for neutral?" Eleanor conceded. Draco smiled and gave a slight smile before kissing her deeply, hoping his lips would convey his regret without having to speak.

Eleanor wasn't sure if giving him another chance was smart or if she was throwing away her integrity. But when she caught a 4th year singing "Weasley is Our King" the next morning at breakfast and then immediately after heard Draco snap "what a stupid fucking song," she felt at least hopeful.


	17. Chapter 17

**Quick Note: **Sorry for the weird update/delete/update situation! I got ahead of myself and uploaded it without editing it completely because I was just so excited to share this one with you all! I'm interested to hear what you all think of these developments! Thank you so much for reading, following, favoriting, commenting! It means so much, and I hope you all stick around for the long haul!

* * *

Sneaking out of the common room was harder than usual on that late October night. Harry had been distracted by writing a letter to Sirius and Eleanor was able to start a debate between Ron and Hermione that left them distracted. This created the perfect opportunity to slip through the portrait hole unnoticed. This wasn't the only added obstacle however, the added eyes of the Inquisitorial Squad made the trek to the Astronomy Tower more perilous than it had been at the beginning of the term.

But seeing Draco made Eleanor's nervous heart slow for a moment before speeding off into an excitement. They didn't see each other as often as summer, and while sneaking away during the night to talk - or not talk - wasn't ideal, it was better than their usual school year interactions, which were usually none at all. Eleanor was always wary in their relationship to not grow too attached or get too excited because Draco never seemed as invested as she did. But she couldn't deny that he kissed her back with a certain excitement that was not compatible with nonchalance.

"Hey," Eleanor whispered into the small space between their lips. Draco didn't respond, not with words anyway, he just kissed her again and pulled her close. "I've missed you." Eleanor giggled as Draco moved his lips to her cheek, her jaw, then her neck. He murmured something in response. It wasn't as though Draco didn't like talking to Eleanor, he usually did, but as the year went along, he always ended up feeling guilty. He knew that he and Eleanor had different goals and different views of success, and usually it didn't impact their relationship, but things were different this year. Eleanor was different, their relationship was different no matter how much they refused labels - or even speaking about it.

Draco was afraid to admit to himself that Eleanor's reservations had been right. Things were different, almost wrong, at school. Sometimes he found himself longing for the long days spent together over the summer. He wondered why they could never be content. He refused to blame himself, though a small part of him feared that he was part of the problem.

No, Draco shook the thought away as he backed Eleanor up to the wall, deepening their kiss. They were good like this. He was content like this. The Astronomy Tower was cold in the dead of a late autumn night. The moon light reflected off of the sprinkle of light snow on the ground and seemed to make the world a little brighter despite the mostly dark and damp days. Eleanor's fingers, ten icicles, found their way into Draco's hair. No, Draco truly didn't have anything to complain about.

Eleanor liked her late night rendezvous with Draco. Though she couldn't convince herself it was enough to keep her fulfilled and all around happy with their relationship, it was better than nothing. She didn't think about how the longer the school year went on, the less they spoke to each other. Their meetings were mostly like this, their mouths occupied in ways other than talking - many other ways. Eleanor blushed furiously at the thought of getting caught up here. They certainly weren't always in the most decent of states however they were more inclined to stay more fully dressed the colder it got. Draco assured her no prefect actually checked the Astronomy Tower on nights it wasn't in use for class, there were too many stairs. He also promised he was hard at work finding a new place for them - a warmer place - he would always press with a twinkle in his eye.

No one knew, of course. Though both party's friends had their suspicions. Eleanor sometimes felt as if she had very little to lose if they were found in a compromising position. She wanted to throw caution to the wind, she wanted to be braver than she felt. And Draco made her feel braver than she would be on her own, but one thought she kept coming back to was the thought of Lucius and Narcissa finding out. This was more mortifying than any other consequence so she wasn't in a big rush to move closer to the prefect's nightly rounds.

Eleanor gathered Draco's robes in her hands in an attempt to pull him closer. Her fingers enclosed around a cold, metal badge that was about the size of her palm. "What's this?" Eleanor asked, pulling away from Draco's warm lips and squinting through the dark to see the object. With the light of the moon glinting off of the badge, she was able to read the two perfect letters "IS".

"What's this?" Eleanor repeated, looking up at Draco in great annoyance.

"Oh, come on, El." Draco rolled his eyes at her. "It isn't a big deal." He moved to return to their kiss but Eleanor moved her head to the side so that his lips came in contact with her cheek. He would have transitioned smoothly and perhaps been able to get her mind off of it had he not been shocked at her flat out refusal. "Are you seriously upset about this?"

"Kind of." Eleanor huffed in a way that let Draco know there was no 'kind of' about how she was currently feeling. He had hoped their emotional disconnect that had been happening slowly wouldn't ever catch up to them. Foolishly he had assumed they would be content to continue snogging until summer arrived again and they could pick up emotionally where they left off in September.

"My father wanted me to do it," Draco explained. "It just looks good to have been involved, you know? Especially with not having Quidditch."

"You could have just joined the Potions club or something." Eleanor looked away and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Not exactly led by a Ministry official." Draco pointed out with a slight chuckle, trying to prove that there wasn't anything to be upset about. He reached his hands out to pull her closer. Eleanor let herself be held by him for a few moments. She was willing to blame it on his ambitions for the future, his want to get ahead, his incessant need to please his father. She could live with that. Draco began kissing her forehead, softly and sweetly. Eleanor closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his waist. She just wanted to be close to him. She felt so lonely without him around, and while she missed their conversations most of all, the physical closeness provided some much needed comfort and assurance to her. Draco held her, relieved that the interchange hadn't turned into an argument. He was content to hold her for awhile before returning to what he had originally planned. He would be sure to be _very _good to her tonight to make up for her annoyance with him.

Eleanor was willing to forget but then her cheek pushed up against that blasted badge and she remembered. She remembered Umbridge telling Harry that he was a liar, she remembered the phrase "I must not tell lies" carved into his hand, she remembered her trying to banish Professor Trelawney from the grounds. Eleanor remembered her comments on half-breeds - specifically on Remus. Most of all, she remembered Hermione's words.

"_He more than hates us,"_

"_You're smart, Eleanor. You know what's best for you."_

"So, you're just doing Umbridge's bidding?" Eleanor asked slowly, Draco sighed inwardly. He should have known Eleanor better than to think she would just drop it. Perhaps if they had spent more time talking…

"It isn't like that." Draco tried to explain.

"She tortures Harry." Eleanor pointed out, releasing herself from Draco's arms. "She is a complete blood purist, she is stopping capable professors from doing their jobs, she is giving herself entirely too much power and rewarding students who align themselves with her which is creating a completely unfair and unjust environment," Eleanor took a deep breath and so did Draco as they both let out what the other party absolutely didn't want to hear:

"Kind of like Voldemort," Eleanor words met Draco's.

"I don't really care."

Both took in a sharp breath and glared at the other. They started talking over each other then.

"That's not a fair comparison to make, Eleanor."

"Really Draco, you don't care?"

"You-Know-Who has been dead for a long time and you are just buying into Potter's lies."

"That's really disheartening, Draco, considering that I thought my friends would have earned a shred of respect and I most certainly thought I would have considering the things we have done up here."

"And you know how hurtful that comparison can be because of the way my parents were treated after the last war. Do you really think so low of me to think that I am the same as every other Dark Wizard for trying to further my career?"

"Why do you idolize mean hearted people when there are good people out there who would love you if you just stopped being such a prick all the time?"

"I don't even see why you care so much about what I do in my free time considering you have seemed perfectly content this whole time with not speaking. _Extremely _content if I may say."

"How am I supposed to love you unconditionally when you align yourself with someone who is against everything I believe in, tortures my friends, and uses every opportunity to demonize my father!" Eleanor's words rung out the loudest in the end as she shoved an aggressive finger against the stupid badge that Draco wished he had just taken off.

The two stood silently for a moment. Eleanor's jaw was firmly, angrily, set as she looked up at him daringly. Draco just stood dumbfounded. His anger was released into confusion and possible bliss. The first word he was stuck on was her use of love, but then he quickly transitioned into confusion over her mention of her father.

"I'm sorry," Draco shook his head "father?"

Eleanor realized she had never referred to Remus as her father, not out loud. She felt ashamed that her growing relationship with Remus was discovered through her anger with Draco. Suddenly, she wanted to see him. She wished for the holidays to be closer. There was an ever present part of her that wished for her true mother and father, the ones she lost, but that never went away. She was trying to only want for what she knew she could have, otherwise it was unneeded misery.

"What about him?"

"I've never once heard Umbridge insult your father."

Eleanor sighed and looked away, deciding that she had let too much out now to not tell him the truth. "Every time she talks about how incompetent Remus Lupin was she is insulting my father."

"Remus Lupin was your father?" Draco's eyes widened. He was unwilling to accept this truth. Eleanor wasn't just a Half-Blood, she wasn't even fully human. He wondered if under her beauty she hid werewolf qualities. No, she couldn't, he would've noticed. But still, he looked at her apprehensively.

"Is my father." Eleanor corrected. "I haven't lost everybody yet." She growled.

The two remained silent for a few more seconds. Draco was trying to process everything he just heard, but he couldn't. He simply could not understand this piece of information. He knew that the Cordarris were not her birth parents, he had accepted that truth. But a Lupin? Eleanor Lupin? It didn't seem real, it didn't seem right. He decided to deny what he had just been told and move to another thought.

"You love me?" Draco asked, reaching in the dark for her hands and feeling a shot of sadness run through him when she backed away.

"Weren't you listening?" Eleanor hissed. "I can't love you. Not when you are running around in leagues with someone who hates everything about me and what I hold dear."

"It's always been like this, El. We've always been at opposite sides." Draco reminded, strangely finding himself wanting her to say those words.

"This is different." Eleanor tried to explain.

"It isn't."

"It is." She said firmly.

Draco felt anger flash in him for a moment, or was it sadness? He couldn't quite tell. He felt completely rejected, which was a feeling he was not used to. Especially when it came to Eleanor. "Why are you still here then?" Draco challenged. "If you aren't going to say it because you apparently don't feel it, then why are you waiting around? Are you waiting for me to change my friends, change my family, change my plans for the future so you don't have to feel guilty about the way you feel about me? Because your friends make you think I'm terrible and everything about me is terrible? You certainly don't seem to think so when we are alone. What are you waiting for? What do you want from me?"

Eleanor wanted to cry. She'd cried in front of Draco many times but this time felt different. He felt different. He was angry at her rejection and she was too proud to admit that she was confused. She didn't want to talk things out, not anymore, not after he blew up at her like that. Maybe it wasn't fair, she knew she wasn't being fair. She expected much more change from him than he expected from her, but maybe Hermione was right. He needed to change more than she did. Or did he? He was ambitious that didn't mean he was callous. But he could be callous. Eleanor didn't know what to think. She loved him, she was quite certain, but he couldn't know and she wouldn't admit it. How could he love her back if he hated every part of her life? She alone was nothing, she needed her friends and her newfound family. He would be hating a part of her that she could not let go of.

"Nothing. Not anymore." Eleanor answered swiftly and darted away, convinced that if she denied it long enough, her love for Draco Malfoy would go away.

* * *

This was new. Him and Eleanor had argued in the past. It was mutual annoyance and pride. It never lasted long. They were almost always back to snogging the next day. But weeks had now passed. Every note he sent her was met without reply. He would end up waiting in their normal spots for hours with no sign of her. He felt like an idiot. She was making a complete fool out of him.

He was enraged that she couldn't understand that he was just bettering himself. And yes, perhaps him and Umbridge had a mutual dislike for Harry Potter and Dumbledore that made her more tolerable to work for, but that didn't make him evil, that didn't make him like Voldemort as Eleanor had implied.

His thoughts were consumed with her, but not in the way they had been before. He felt betrayed. He wanted to see her and tell her off. He didn't even think about kissing her. Well, sometimes those thoughts snuck in as well, but it wasn't the majority of them. One night had left him severely sour, when he had asked her after class to meet him by the library. She made no indication that she heard him but he knew that she had, and yet she made him sit in the dark alcove by the library utterly alone. He could not possibly comprehend what he had done.

He decided to skip dinner the next night to avoid seeing her smiling and laughing with the people that apparently made her incapable of loving him. It would be too humiliating. So he sat in the common room flipping through a Quidditch magazine without registering any of the information.

"I hope you don't mind getting frown lines young." A laughing voice teased from the stairs to the dormitories.

"What?" Draco snapped, looking up at the girl who was poking fun at him. He knew her, or knew of her. She was a year older and rather unspectacular when it came to academics, though she was a skilled dueler he seemed to recall. He tried to remember her name. It started with a B. Beatrice? Bridget, perhaps? Yes, that sounded right.

Bridget held her hands up in mock surrender as she descended the stairs into the empty common room. "I'm just saying. Wrinkles come early when you're so serious." She screwed her face up into a mock scowl, continuing to tease him. Draco was not in the mood.

"Yeah well, nothing for you to concern yourself with."

"Oh come on, I'm only teasing." Her blonde hair was pulled back into a ponytail and her legs were long. She was quite pretty, Draco decided. She found a seat on the chair next to his.

"And why, may I ask, are you being such a tease?" Draco asked with a tight, disingenuous smile.

Bridget shrugged. "You seemed lonely."

"I'm not." Draco asserted, looking back at his magazine.

"Your friends beg to differ." Bridget laughed, gesturing to the empty room around them. She cracked a smile, a beautiful smile. Something about her quip reminded him of Eleanor. It made his heart ache ever so slightly, but he shoved that feeling away.

_She is prettier than Eleanor, _Draco thought to himself, but felt a near insane amount of guilt when he thought it. He tried to push the guilt away too, but it stuck around a little longer. _And she sure isn't rejecting me._

"Do you want to keep being lonely?" Bridget pressed. Draco tried to remember any sort of information about her. He thought he overheard Pansy gossiping about how Bridget's boyfriend had been caught with another girl a few days ago. Ah, that made more sense. She was throwing herself at him out of revenge, but was he any different? Was he any better?

"Are you going to keep bothering me?" Draco wondered aloud.

"Probably." Bridget laughed.

No, Draco decided, he was not any better than Bridget.

* * *

"You're rather good at that." Bridget giggled from her bed as Draco hurriedly looked around the dorm for his clothes. Draco doubted very much that her words were true. He felt awkward and uncomfortable the whole time. The small bed and the fact that she really seemed to not care for him at all. It all felt very uninviting. Eleanor always made him feel at home. Of course he had never done with Eleanor what he just did with Bridget, but they had gotten close. Close enough for him to know that he preferred her. "You've obviously done that before." She pressed.

He had not.

"Have you seen my other sock?" Draco brushed off her comment.

"You're in such a hurry." She laughed. "No time to breathe?"

"I'm just a little concerned at the fact that the entirety of our house will return from dinner at any moment." Draco shrugged, sarcastically nonchalant.

"I guess next time we will have to go somewhere a little more private."

Draco froze as he picked up his missing sock from the floor. "Yeah, next time." He agreed. He didn't necessarily want there to be a next time, but he knew there wouldn't be a time with Eleanor in the near future. He knew that with sickening certainty.

With Eleanor, it would have been good, spectacular, loving and intimate. It wouldn't have been over so quickly on a tiny, uncomfortable dorm bed. He wouldn't have had to close his eyes and pretend it was someone else. But he couldn't dwell on that. Someone's arms were better than no arms, even if they weren't Eleanor's.

Draco gave an awkward nod to Bridget before he left her alone in the room. He couldn't think too long about what had just occurred before he started feeling guilty. He tried to regain himself on the couch with his magazine while some of his friends filed back in.

Blaise raised his eyebrows at Draco's inside out shirt, but didn't say anything until he saw Bridget, looking flustered and disheveled walking down the stairs.

"What the hell, Draco?" Blaise put together, looking at his friend in disbelief.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Draco shrugged, refusing to look up.

"What about Eleanor?" Blaise pressed.

A wild feeling of fury and guilt - mostly aimed at himself - blew up in his chest. He pushed up from the chair and glared hard at Blaise. "I don't know what you're talking about." He repeated harshly before retreating to his room, shielding himself from the world.


	18. Chapter 18

**Quick Note: **Happy Thanksgiving for all who celebrate, and happy day to those who don't! When thinking of my uploading schedule, I didn't intend for this specific chapter to be put out on the holiday, it just sort of fell on today. So with that being said, this chapter is not quite a happy, holiday chapter. It's going to bounce around a fair bit and follow Eleanor through the aftermath of what happened in the last chapter! Just a fair warning on that one in case you were expecting a joyous holiday installment!

Also, I just want to give you all a huge thank you for all of the love I've been receiving on this story! I absolutely love hearing from you, it seriously makes my day! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

* * *

Hogwarts was a buzz with word of Draco and Bridget. They apparently weren't an item officially, but neither were him and Eleanor before. Eleanor watched across the Great Hall as the two sat beside each other and chatted quietly. He seemed to think she was funny because Eleanor caught him laughing rather often.

It felt like a knife was being driven through her back. She knew she had brought this on. Draco had asked for weeks after their fight to talk, he'd wanted to meet, and she never responded. She never gave in. Of course he would begin seeing someone else, it was what she had all but invited him to do. Bridget was beautiful. Bridget was a Pureblood. Bridget's friends didn't hate Draco. Bridget didn't ask Draco to change. Bridget was perfect for him, easy as breathing. It came naturally.

In short, Bridget was everything Eleanor wasn't.

She ground her teeth angrily, eyes fixed on the piece of toast in front of her. It was all that she had chosen for breakfast, and it hadn't been touched. She had completely lost her appetite. She dared another glance up at Draco, for a moment their eyes caught. He looked smug. Something snapped inside her as she pushed up from the table.

"Eleanor, you haven't eaten." Ginny pointed out, worried for her friend.

"Not hungry." Eleanor grumbled in return. The seemingly false worry of her friends made Eleanor want to scream. She knew that they were all secretly thrilled that Eleanor and Draco were no longer friends in the slightest. Ron had suspected them of sneaking about, and while no one confronted her about this suspicion, she was sure they all held it. And now Bridget answered their prayers, she proved that Eleanor's ties with Draco were broken.

Bridget seemed to be everyone's saving grace.

"Where are you going?" Hermione called after her.

"I don't know, to be alone." Eleanor replied, not sparing a glance back.

"Oh, okay." Hermione conceded easily.

Eleanor's heart broke. She knew she said she wanted to be alone, she knew she was not being fair, but she wanted her friends to fight for her. The way she had wanted to Draco to fight for her.

She wanted someone to stick around.

Letting out a quiet puff of air, Eleanor began to make her way to the greenhouse. Her Herbology class consisted of keeping a sprout of a Wiggentree alive, she decided to get away from the bustle and crowd of the morning by checking her growing tree.

Eleanor's anger only grew deeper when she saw her sprout dry, brown, and withering pathetically.

"Damn it all to hell." She cursed lowly, angry tears filling the corners of her eyes. She began to poke around at the soil to see if there was anything indicating why it would be dying. She was good at taking care of plants. She might not have had much at this point in her life, but she knew she had a green thumb.

"They're all wilting." A small voice from behind her said. Eleanor spun around to see Professor Sprout carrying two large bags of soil and looking around at all of the plants in the greenhouse, slowly bending and becoming less colorful with each passing second. "My dear, are you quite well?"

Eleanor realized, then, that the wilting flowers was her doing. Her emotions, dark, and angry, and sad, was causing death all around her. "I-I'm sorry." She stammered out, looking at the mass destruction she was causing with her magic responding to her dreadful emotions. "I can't make it stop." She closed her eyes tightly, willing the flowers back to life, trying to will herself back to life. It was like she was a child again, unable to control her emotions, unable to control her magic. And she could not make the flowers rise again. Before Professor Sprout could offer words of advice, Eleanor was walking swiftly out of the greenhouse, knocking her dead plant over in her wake.

* * *

Four essays to redo. The week before Eleanor turned in five essays, and the following week she received four essays that needed to be completely redone. She sat in a poorly lit corner of the common room, looking at her awful work, and unsure of how she could make it any better. She'd always been a good student. She was never as smart as Hermione, or Draco, but she made good marks, her professors liked her. And now, here she was with four essays marked up beyond recognition.

She was exhausted. She'd only managed an hour or two of sleep a night, her mind would barely shut off for even that. Her heart was always racing, she was never hungry. Not only was there a loss of hunger, but her stomach was constantly rolling so that there was a huge aversion to it. She looked from her essays to her shaking hands. She didn't recognize who she was.

Her friends, or so they called themselves, were gone. She didn't know where. They had all disappeared somewhere, and they did so consistently. Eleanor never pushed to be invited because she always felt unwelcome, and they never asked her to come along. She hadn't spoken to Draco in weeks, but had watched him speak to Bridget every day.

She wanted to talk to someone. Something wasn't right with her, she could feel it in her bones. Everything was off. She needed to talk to Draco. She would make things right, she had to. She couldn't live like this any longer.

Eleanor stacked her books and her essays neatly on the table in the corner and stood to walk to the Astronomy Tower. She knew for the first bit of their separation, Draco went up there to speak with her. She wondered, she hoped, that maybe he still did. Maybe he was waiting for her to meet him so they could talk. They would be able to figure this mess out.

A dangerously low amount of confidence pushed Eleanor forward as she walked the halls of Hogwarts. It wasn't yet past curfew and the hallways weren't being monitored, though they were rather empty. She tried to think of what she would say to him. She felt secure in her stance on the Inquisitorial Squad, but she could have been kinder about other things. She had words she could take back, amends she could make.

Lost in her thoughts of reconciliation, she came abruptly to a stop when at the end of the hallway, she saw them. Draco and Bridget kissing deeply, lost in each other's embrace. They way they used to be. And Draco apparently wasn't afraid of getting caught with her due to their proximity to the general student body.

Eleanor watched for a moment too long, tears sprang to her eyes. Everything before had been hearsay, she could've convinced herself it wasn't real. But here it was, in front of her.

She turned swiftly up the stairs and ran up the Astronomy tower, her tired and aching chest was heaving for breath as she cried. Nothing was right. Nothing made sense. Everything was completely, and totally wrong. Draco should've been with her. Her friends should've been talking to her. She should've been doing well in school. She should've been happy, and healthy. Her parents should've been alive.

Once she made it to the top of the tower, she allowed herself to sob.

"You stupid girl." She scolded herself. Her body shook from the cold, sadness, and exhaustion.

This was when, for the first time, she realized she was truly and utterly alone.

* * *

The feeling of betrayal had never left Eleanor's chest. She was angry that Draco didn't value her enough to lay down his pride. She was angry that he expected her to forget her friends and her morals while he paraded around in the insufferable Inquisitorial Squad.

She was lonely without him. She'd felt lonely for a while but she had been unwilling to face the truth before that night the two had fought viciously. The truth was that he had moved on and had no further care for her.

And then, the worst betrayal of all. When she saw the list of names, all of her dearest friends, her friends that she had fought for, that she had turned Draco away for, the friends he 'tortured', the friends that Eleanor was supposed to be 'smart enough' to defend. They were now all apart of a secret club that Eleanor had no idea about.

"What's this?" Eleanor asked Hermione as her friend exited the bathroom and entered their dorm. Hermione was obviously caught off guard when she saw the thin slip of paper in Eleanor's hands.

"How did you find that?" Hermione asked, sitting next to Eleanor on her bed. Her wet hair made little wet spots on her pajamas, which she normally couldn't stand but she chose to ignore.

"I was trying to find that shirt that I let you loan a few weeks ago." Eleanor huffed. "I found this instead."

"We were going to tell you," Hermione started, but she couldn't seem to finish her thought.

Eleanor looked away and handed Hermione the paper. "No you weren't." Eleanor said, her voice devoid of feeling. She was starting to feel completely empty. No Draco, no parents, now her best friends were keeping her out in the dark.

"We just weren't sure if you would tell…" Hermione regretted her words when she said them, but she knew that Eleanor needed to hear honesty.

"Draco?" Eleanor asked. Hermione nodded once. "Well you don't have to worry about that anymore. Haven't you heard? He's with Bridget now."

"Eleanor, I-"

"I don't want to talk about it." Lie. But Eleanor stood anyway. "What's this Dumbledore's Army?"

"Harry is teaching us Defense Against the Dark Arts, since Umbridge won't." Hermione explained. She wanted Eleanor to talk to her, especially about Draco since it was obviously bothering her, but Hermione knew better than to expect that from Eleanor. "You can join, just sign at the-"

"No thank you." Eleanor snapped, throwing the piece of parchment to the side and turning away from Hermione. "I know where I'm not wanted."

"Don't do this, Eleanor. You don't need to isolate yourself out of anger." Hermione chided softly.

"Oh, I'm doing this to myself?" Eleanor growled. "I decided that you lot should form a secret club and leave me out of it. I thought I was your best friend."

"I thought Draco was your best friend." Hermione retorted defensively, before shaking her head to clear the building anger. She knew it wasn't fair of her to get defensive. "Eleanor, what has been going on with you lately? You aren't yourself."

Eleanor's gaze darted to her, sadness, anger, and perhaps a hint of relief that someone had finally asked flashed behind her slightly red eyes. Her eyes lately had always been a little red, as if she was crying more often than not. Hermione wasn't convinced that that wasn't true, but she hadn't seen Eleanor shed a tear. The great big purple bags brought down her usually happy, and playful demeanor. Hermione wasn't sure if this was Draco's doing or hers, she was scared to admit that it was probably an equal mixture.

"You've heard about everything, you know what's wrong." Eleanor accused. "And yet you still didn't seem to care." Her words were cold and Hermione almost shivered. She was a stranger to her now.

"I'm here to talk about it." Hermione remained calm.

"No," Eleanor shot back. She hated feeling this way, she hated the anger that manifested in her words and actions. This wasn't her, she felt almost feral. She hadn't been sleeping, or eating, or talking to anyone the way she should have been. She was like a shell of who she truly was and she was so tired and so incredibly angry at everyone, including herself. "You aren't here to talk about it, you're here because you feel guilty."

"I do feel guilty." Hermione nodded. "I haven't been the friend that you needed." Eleanor stared at her silently. Nobody had been the friend that she needed, and she knew that she only had herself to blame for that. She had pushed away Hermione, Ron, and Harry in favor of Draco, and pushed Draco away in favor of Hermione, Ron, and Harry. She had always prided herself on compartmentalizing those friendships so well, but in the end, it had been her demise. She could not exist straddling two worlds. She could not be fully herself when only giving those she loved half of who she was.

She thought that she had been multiple people. She was her parent's Eleanor, she was the Gryffindor Eleanor, she was Draco's Eleanor, she was now also Remus' Eleanor. She thought that eventually she would have to choose which one to settle down as, and in doing so would disappoint the others. But as the hurt, confusion, and pain tugged at her heart and was slowly ruining her, she knew that her only option was to just be Eleanor. She needed to be all of them, she was all of them. And everyone in her life needed to be okay with that.

Tears began to fill Eleanor's eyes as she looked at Hermione. She was grateful that they were alone in their dorm. Hermione tentatively reached out to give her friend a hug and Eleanor unexpectedly collapsed into her arms.

"Everything has just gotten so confusing." Eleanor began to cry. "I thought he loved me." Hermione didn't need to ask who. "I mean, he never said it. And we argued a bit, but we've always argued. I thought if I had asked him to stop that stupid Inquisitorial Squad, he would. But instead he went and he's now apparently sleeping with Bridget."

"You don't know that for sure." Hermione tried to console, unsure of what to say. She had never believed Draco to be upstanding, so it was unsurprising to her that he didn't drop out of a club for Eleanor, but she knew that those words would be unhelpful.

"What did I do to make him hate me?" Eleanor began to cry harder. "I was trying, I knew it was hard because you lot hate him. I understand why, I'm not mad about that really, but he knew that I was working through it. And everything with my parents, I was so scared that he didn't want me because I wasn't theirs, I was so terrified to let everyone know we were together because what if people found out about Remus and he was so ashamed that he just left me." Eleanor sniffled here, giving Hermione a pause to think over everything she said. The part about their friendship made sense, but once she started talking about her parents and Remus, she was lost. "And I'm not ashamed of Remus, I'm not. I'm happy about all of that, but it's something I'm still wrestling with and he knew it was hard for me to wrestle with that, and with you all, and with him at once. At least I thought he knew. I know I asked a lot of him, I asked for a lot of change and understanding, but I didn't think not being a huge fucking prick would be this damn hard for him." Hermione cracked a smile at that and let her friend cry, trying to work over everything she said in her head. Hermione wasn't the brightest witch of her age for nothing, so she thought she was understanding the situation right but after a few minutes of Eleanor quieting her crying, she had to ask.

"Eleanor," She began slowly, "I'm not understanding your connection to Professor Lupin."

"Harry hasn't told you?" Eleanor asked, sitting up and wiping her eyes on her sweater sleeve. Hermione looked sadly at her blotched, red face.

"No." She shook her head, shocked that Harry knew all of this before she did. And even more shocked that he didn't tell her.

"Well," Eleanor chewed on her lip. "Basically I found out in the will that my parents aren't my parents biologically. I'm actually Remus'." Hermione's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"I'd wondered why you two were so close." She said. "I just thought he understood your grief."

Eleanor shrugged. "He does. He's really wonderful about taking things slow and working out our relationship as we go. It's just a lot of new. It's hard to balance the grief with the excitement sometimes."

"That's life, though." Hermione shrugged. "Grief and joy all mixed together."

Eleanor smiled a little at her friend, feeling closer than they had in months.

"Yeah, that's life." Eleanor conceded. The words didn't ease her pain, but having Hermione make an effort put Eleanor more at ease.

The two girls were quiet for a while, holding hands and Eleanor still shuddering from the aftershocks of her many tears cried. Eleanor was tired of keeping things from people, she was tired of compartmentalizing. She was no longer going to keep things from anyone to lessen herself into a more manageable, easily liked version of Eleanor. It was too hard on her to be different people all at once. Perhaps she would make her friends angry, perhaps relationships would be more complicated. But she was allowed to be complicated, she was allowed to not make everyone happy all of the time.

"Eleanor," Hermione started slightly, unsure of how her question would be taken, "why did Harry know before me?"

* * *

Eleanor crumpled the ministry letter in her hands while sitting in the Great Hall a few days later. It was the same reply she had always received, but with the stresses of Draco still not talking to her, her friendship with her fellow Gryffindors still being rather rocky, and Umbridge being a self appointed authoritarian, the Ministry bullshit was the last thing Eleanor needed.

"Still no answer?" Hermione inquired softly, putting a gentle hand on Eleanor's shoulder. Between Harry being accused of blasphemy and Eleanor not being informed of the reasons for her parent's death, seething hatred for the Ministry was at an all time high for the four friends.

"There is an entire hospital of supposedly highly qualified mediwizards and I am supposed to believe that nearly six months have passed since two high standing wizards died on their premises and they don't know why." Eleanor growled. "Not even an inkling. What kind of tests are these people even running at this point?"

"I'm sorry Eleanor." Hermione soothed quietly, "I can't even imagine." Hermione had been making consistent, small efforts to check in with Eleanor. She was trying to make sure Eleanor didn't isolate herself on purpose, as she was wont to do when she was upset, however the other people in the group of Gryffindors were dealing with their own struggles, and Eleanor hadn't had the opportunity or the desire to sit down with them just yet and explain the hell she'd been enduring that term.

"It's fine." Eleanor rolled her eyes, her tone and tense shoulders gave away the fact that she was definitely not fine. "I'm not hungry, I'm gonna take a walk before class." Eleanor shoved away from the table and walked out of the Great Hall. She was unsure of where she wanted to go, she had ample time before class to go nearly anywhere in the castle and make it back to Transfiguration in time. Eleanor was tempted to just not show up, Professor McGonagall was the most understanding when it came to the continual pain those letters brought. However, Eleanor was also not doing well in that class - or any of her classes for that matter - and she was unsure that McGonagall would be as willing to let her lack of attendance go.

Eleanor found a secluded corner of the courtyard. She brought her robes close to her body to shield against the crisp air that autumn was turning cold. The moment she sat amidst the chilled breeze, she regretted her decision to sit outside, however being able to take deep breaths and smell the surrounding trees calmed her wildly beating heart.

"Bit chilled out here." a distant voice noted. Eleanor rolled her blue eyes at Draco's sudden appearance, somehow his Inquisitorial Squad badge seemed to be the only part of him that she could see, like he was leading with it.

"Come to report me to the High Inquisitor?" Eleanor asked cuttingly as she looked away from him. Draco was glad she looked away so he could roll his own eyes. She was able to do it without fear of him saying anything, but if he dared to roll his eyes, she would have more to say than he cared to hear about it. This wasn't the first words either wanted to say to the other after their fight, but this was what it had come to.

"Don't act like that, Eleanor." Draco sighed, leaning against the wall next to where she was seated. He hated the weight that the badge on his robes carried. Looking back, he doesn't know why he joined. His father encouraged it, and Umbridge was hellbent on getting the unqualified teachers out of Hogwarts, which was something Draco wasn't opposed to; but Eleanor could hardly look at him, let alone spend time with him. Not while he spent time with Umbridge.

"Can you just go?" Eleanor all but groaned.

"You can't ignore me forever, you know?" Draco pointed out in anger. He was tired of Bridget, tired of being alone with a stranger, tired of not talking to Eleanor. If she stopped being so stubborn, he would be sure to talk to her more. "The holiday is coming up. You surely didn't think my parents would let you spend it alone?"

"I won't be alone, I'll be with Remus." Eleanor answered swiftly.

Draco stiffened at the sound of her birth father's name. There were a lot of things said the last time they talked, and Draco could occupy himself with Eleanor's other flaws, however he still wasn't sure how he felt about her being the daughter of a werewolf. He knew she had no werewolf qualities, or he would have known long before, and when he told her over the summer that she was still Eleanor, and it didn't change things, he'd been truthful. He would treat her the same no matter what, but her werewolf father wasn't helping the matter in the slightest.

"Eleanor, don't do that to them." Draco was suddenly very serious. "Not this Christmas."

"Are you really concerned for them?" Eleanor questioned. "I don't see how that furthers your career interests or how that looks for future jobs. You aren't one to put the feelings of others before personal gain."

A million responses flashed through Draco's mind in that moment. He resisted the urge to be exactly the man she thought he was and say any of them. "It would be nice to have you around for this first Christmas without them. Just think about it." Draco swallowed every nasty thing he was thinking and simply walked away.

"They were my parents," Eleanor called after him, her voice rising to a shout. Anger burned inside of her in a way that made her feel she was going to completely lose control. She wanted to scream, and kick, and cry, and be completely ridiculous. "It is not up to you to tell me how to spend my first Christmas without my parents."

Draco didn't turn around to face her, but he did slow his pace. He was curious if she would say something that warranted a further remark from him.

"You just want me around because I'm the only decent part of you." Eleanor snarled out when Draco didn't respond to her initial lash out at him. It was a cruel thing to say, and something that Eleanor did not believe in the slightest. Her heart physically hurt when the words passed her lips, and she would have been lying if she said there was no regret for her callous. But her anger got the better of her, her sadness and anxiety that had been building towards Draco for weeks finally bubbled out in an ugly spew of words she didn't mean, but refused to take back.

Draco stopped at those words, still not turning around. He took a visible breath to calm himself. Eleanor was breathing heavily, her jaw was set angrily, and despite feeling weak and tired and defeated, her body was rigid; she was ready to defend herself. Part of her ached for another screaming match with Draco. At least they'd be talking, at least it would dissolve some of her anger.

Her words cut Draco to the bone but his pride didn't allow him to show that. He knew she wanted a fight, and he desperately wanted to say everything that had been on his mind since the fight, but he knew it would kill her more to hear what he said next, because it would only prove her wrong.

"I want you around for the sake of our parents, nothing else."


	19. Chapter 19

**Quick Note: **Hello all! Thank you so much for all of the wonderful support of this little work of mine! I hope you continue to enjoy it!

* * *

Eleanor elected to ride in a compartment alone on the ride to King's Cross. Her mind was fixated on the thought of riding in a car with the Malfoys after not speaking consistently to Draco since their fight, nearly a month and a half prior. Despite her conversation with Hermione, Eleanor still felt very out of place with her friends. Hermione was making efforts, but it never felt like she was meant to be among them. She felt like an inconvenience. And she was still being kept in the dark.

She didn't really feel like she was meant to be anywhere. Her friends didn't trust her because of her relationship with Draco (even though she assured them it was no longer an issue) and she couldn't be with Draco because of the way he thought of her friends, not to mention the pair's mutual stubbornness. She had Remus, but she didn't feel like she really did. Remus was very good about writing frequent and substantial letters and Eleanor did really appreciate him, however she didn't feel comfortable going to him for things like troubles with Draco and especially not troubles with Harry, Ron and Hermione; all of whom, Eleanor was sure, Remus trusted and valued far beyond her.

The holidays, usually her favorite time of the year, felt empty and painful without the only people she truly belonged with. With each passing day Eleanor grew more and more empty. Her chest felt hollow and cold. She tried very hard to not let this sadness show, but she crumpled at the sight of Lucius and Narcissa waiting for her on the platform. She didn't expect to cry at the sight of the two tall, stern looking blondes, but her eyes grew glassy and Narcissa's face lit up and gave a small yet excited wave. These were two people who loved her, she believed, with no conditions. Like her parents once had.

Eleanor dropped her trunk clumsily at her feet as she clutched Narcissa tightly, tears leaking out of the corner of her eyes. She hadn't realized how much she truly needed a comforting hug and gentle words of welcome. Eleanor wiped the wetness from her cheeks and pulled out of the warm embrace when she heard Lucius greet his son pleasantly. Narcissa smiled at Eleanor once more before putting an affectionate hand on Draco's cheek.

Eleanor looked at Lucius with a vague sense of hope, she searched his distracted face for any sign that he had information to share, but he was too busy asking Draco about the Inquisitorial Squad to notice Eleanor's eyes.

The drive to Malfoy Manor was bleak. Eleanor suffered silently as Lucius and Draco exchanged stories and laughs about his adventures as a Prefect and also as a member of Umbridge's club. Eleanor stared longingly out the window, wishing to be outside of the car. She would have ridden in the trunk if it meant she didn't have to endure this conversation. The whole while she was hating herself because she knew this was exactly what she expected to happen. In the end, she could only blame herself.

Upon arrival at Malfoy Manor, Eleanor silently retreated to the room she had stayed in over the summer and slowly unpacked her necessities in the bathroom and mindlessly wrapped gifts she had been collecting the past few months - a task that normally brought immense joy, but was now hollow and heartbreaking. This time last year she was dancing with Draco at the Yule Ball, the pair laughing without care as they had always done. Draco flirting the way he always did with her and Eleanor paying next to no attention. Then she returned home and wrapped gifts with her mother and drank cider, and her father read A Christmas Carol and they had decorated the tree as they prepared to welcome friends into their home. If Eleanor had known then that it was their final Christmas, she would have cherished it so much more. She would have made a note to remember how her father's voice sounded, or not gotten annoyed with her mother for trying to play Christmas songs on the piano and executed it very poorly.

There were so many things Eleanor would have done differently if she knew that this Christmas she would be laying in the cold in front of an unlit fireplace feeling empty and alone as the laughter of the Malfoys drifted up the stairs. She was physically and emotionally frozen. Maybe it was intentional, maybe she could only feel close to her parents if she were cold and lifeless like they were. Tears leaked onto the rug as she stared at the logs in the fireplace. She was too drained to start a fire and unsure if she even wanted to.

She had never felt less merry and bright.

"Eleanor?" A soft voice asked from the door, Eleanor didn't know how long she had been laying there. The room was dark now, it was night. She hadn't eaten dinner. She pretended to not hear Narcissa, she pretended to be asleep. She couldn't talk to them, not now. "It's freezing in here." Narcissa whispered to herself, apparently believing that Eleanor was sleeping. Eleanor was both relieved and saddened by this, which she didn't understand. Sparks flew from the end of Narcissa's wand and the fireplace was ablaze, warming Eleanor's cold nose. A warm wool blanket was draped on her and she heard footsteps leave the room and stop in the doorway.

"Don't bother her with dinner, let her sleep." Narcissa's quiet voice instructed as she disappeared down the hall.

"I know you aren't asleep." Draco's voice came to her with a condescending sneer after a few moments passed. "You don't have to brood. We're only trying to help."

Eleanor's numb mind blazed momentarily with all of the things she should say to him, but she remained still and silent as more tears leaked out of her eyes.

* * *

After laying on the floor for hours, Eleanor realized that the Manor suffocated her. Disoriented, hungry and cold, Eleanor made her way down to the Floo and went home well after two in the morning. There was no food in her cabinets, which had been abandoned since September. Eleanor didn't care, she simply dragged her sad body to her parent's bedroom. She rifled through the closet for old sweaters and blankets the held pleasant memories and started a fire in the hearth to keep her warm. She snuggled deep into her mother's side of the bed wrapped in her father's favorite winter sweater. The ice inside her chest was beginning to melt. She felt at home.

* * *

The smell of hot chocolate hit her nose as she was pulled from a dreamless sleep. Before she opened her eyes and was fully awake she wondered if her awful loneliness had all been a nightmare; that maybe her mother was making her hot chocolate to wake her gently before they decorated their home for the holidays. It was a nice thought, but it wasn't reality.

In reality, the only two people it could be were Hermione and Draco. Considering Hermione was assuming that Eleanor was at Malfoy Manor and Draco knew that to be untrue, that only left one option. Draco was reading in an armchair by the dwindling fire and a cup of cocoa steamed by her bedside. She didn't know how long he had been there.

She stared at the back of his head, anger running through her veins. Anger and sadness. She saw the blonde hair and all she could think about was how he had joined the Inquisitorial Squad and was becoming more of Umbridge's pet every day. She thought of all the awful things Umbridge said and stood for. She thought of his stupid song that had been a torture for one of her dear friends. She thought of all the times he called Hermione a mudblood, or all of the times he had tormented Harry. Why had she ever been so enamored with him?

But then there was that stupid cocoa. He knew exactly where she was and he came to her with cocoa. Who was he? Was he the boy who tormented her friends to feel important, or was he the man who brought her warm cocoa when she felt otherwise lifeless? Did one of his personas outweigh the other? Could they live in harmony, or was he at war with himself the way her world was turning into a war?

Despite all of these questions, she blurted the one thing on her mind. "Are you sleeping with Bridget?"

Draco jumped at the sound of her voice and turned around to see her calmly laying under a pile of blankets, unmoved from the position he saw her sleeping in that morning. Her eyes looked different than they normally did. They weren't wide and inquisitive and kind and welcoming. They were cold and accusatory and empty. He knew he had assisted in that shift. He knew he had hurt her. She wasn't innocent in all of it, she had been rude to him as well. She partook in the fights and arguing just as much as he had. She hadn't communicated consistently either, she was just as content entertaining a physical engagement rather than growing emotional one. But Draco felt guilty, he owed her the truth - both to be a good communicator and because it wasn't totally his fault and she needed to know the consequences of her actions. His consequences were her harsh words and bitterness towards him and her consequence was:

"Yes, I am."

Draco didn't know what reaction he expected from her. More yelling was a definite possibility, he had selfishly and darkly hoped for tears. He got nothing. She simply stared at him and stayed locked in her position for several minutes.

What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to say? She knew that he was, she had heard it around the castle and he never came to the Astronomy Tower, though there were several times she had waited there until nearly dawn to see if he would show. She couldn't be angry with him for sleeping with Bridget, she stopped seeing him because he was acting cruelly and she didn't agree with such behavior. That was a valid and mature reason, it wasn't stupid or childish to want to be seeing a man who was kind and good. But that train of thought always left Eleanor a little confused because he was good, he had just now brought her a hot chocolate as she hid away. That was kind. He had stayed by her all summer and beyond, he told her kind things. Was a person either all good or all bad? Could she love the good in a person and hate the bad? Was she bad if she let the good win out?

It didn't matter. He was sleeping with Bridget. That hurt Eleanor deeper than she ever would have thought, to know that Bridget was Draco's first. Not first everything, that's for sure, but first real partner. Even Eleanor hadn't been the first with the acts that they committed in random nooks and crannies of the castle, but she never dwelled because she knew in her heart that her and Draco would be the first ones to be with each other fully, eventually. But she had been wrong. It was Bridget.

Eleanor stared at the cup of cocoa, seeing his peace offering, his kindness, his goodness. It was all as small as that mug that sat on the table getting colder and more useless the longer she looked at it. What good was a cocoa? What did it prove? It wasn't real kindness. He would give her a cocoa, but he wouldn't dare give one to Hermione, or Ron or Harry or her father or anyone else. He wouldn't even smile in their direction. His kindness was hollow, just like Eleanor's chest and life. It wasn't overflowing, it wasn't abundant, it wasn't full.

In her confusion, she grabbed the mug from the bedside table and marched into the bathroom where she poured the contents down the drain. She ran the water and let the faucet splash away any remnants of the liquid, then wet down her face and dried it with a towel before facing him again.

"Why did you leave?" Draco questioned, apparently unphased by Eleanor's rejection of his olive branch - which disappointed but didn't surprise her.

"I couldn't sleep." Eleanor shrugged. "I wanted to be home."

"Here meaning wanting to be far away from me." Draco pointed out. The pair kept their voices just above a whisper. Eleanor didn't have the heart to yell anymore, she couldn't give him the satisfaction.

Eleanor simply shrugged again. "That could have been the reason I couldn't sleep."

Draco fought hard against rolling his eyes at her. She looked disheveled as she stood in the doorway to the bathroom. Her emotions didn't reach her eyes, her heart wasn't on her sleeve, her shoulders sagged. This wasn't Eleanor. "What's been going on with you? Since our fight?"

"Wouldn't you like to know." Eleanor scoffed, returning to the comfort of her parents' bed. She stared at the ceiling in silence for a few moments as she contemplated what to say, if anything. What had been going on with her? She was lonely, at the root of it. Her friendship with the others felt like a shell of what they once were and she knew they were keeping secrets from her. They didn't trust her because she had been fraternizing with the enemy. She missed them and her connection to them which had been ruined because of her relationship with Draco - and now she had nothing to show for that.

She felt like a complete fool.

"I was almost a Hufflepuff, did you know that?" Eleanor finally let out. Draco blinked in surprise at her words but she didn't look at him. "Probably not, I only told my parents, and was especially careful not to mention it to you." Eleanor sighed a bit sadly. "The Sorting Hat told me that I was going to make a great Hufflepuff, and example one. I was so petrified. I said that you would hate me forever and I would lose you. I requested to be put in Slytherin. The Sorting Hat laughed at me, _actually laughed." _Eleanor chuckled a bit to herself too at the memory. "It told me that I wasn't nearly cunning or ambitious enough to be a Slytherin, not even close. Although, it showed bravery to be asked to put there, but it also showed loyalty to my friend, so perhaps Gryffindor would be a good fit. It was a tough choice really, The Hat went back and forth quite a lot and eventually asked me where I saw myself; given the choice. Again, I said Slytherin. He then put me in Gryffindor because only a brave and stupid fool would want to be where they didn't belong. It wasn't a pleasant sorting experience, but one rather indicative of my Hogwarts career so far."

"Meaning?" Draco asked, feeling a bit confused. He seemed to remember the two of them fighting rather viciously before that so it was difficult for him to imagine his proud Eleanor begging the Sorting Hat to be close to him. He was fairly certain that had she been put in Slytherin that night she would have spent the entire evening trying to be as far from him as possible and shooting death glares at him.

"I make a lot of sacrifices trying to be where you are. I just don't know how far I'm willing to go. I went against the Sorting Hat, I lost all my friends, I lost my home just to be around you and make you happy." Eleanor paused. "To make me happy too, I suppose."

"Sorry that being around me is such a _sacrifice _for you." Draco spat the word back at her like the insult it was. He had always felt less than next to her and up until a month ago she had banished those fears, then she let them fester, and now she confirmed them. He tried not to show how much he was hurting.

"It isn't, that's my point." Eleanor snapped out of her calm facade at Draco's snark. She glared hard at him as she sat up from the bed. He was now standing at the foot, staring down at her. "I've never felt like I have given up things. I've always been happy to do it because you're worth it. I fight for you in front of my friends and I was happy to do it because I knew you were good and I knew that I was right."

"And now?" Draco questioned.

"Well you've just proved my point, haven't you?" Eleanor had to keep her strength by not sobbing out her next words. "You're sleeping with Bridget."

"We haven't spoken in weeks and you didn't make an effort to reconcile." Draco pointed to her, not wanting to have Bridget - his biggest regret - thrown in his face.

"Because you didn't change. Why would I try to reconcile when you didn't even try to see things from my perspective. I'm always the ones making changes, Draco. I'm not saying you don't do things for me, obviously you do. I'm just," Eleanor huffed, she wanted to scream at him but she took a deep breath to try to control her emotions. "I don't know who you are. I don't know if you are the Draco that is sleeping with Bridget and is on the Inquisitorial Squad and torturing Harry Potter and his friends for sport, or are you the Draco that I spent my summer with, the one who is sweet and kind. I can't be with both of them."

"You apparently can't be with either." Eleanor looked away, convinced that he didn't understand. "You have flaws too. And you don't work on them either. You have a terrible temper, you are proud, you are a huge hypocrite, you always turn everything into this huge emotional event when it doesn't have to be. I could go on, do you want me to?"

"Go ahead." Eleanor challenged. She didn't relish in having all of her shortcomings yelled at her but a foolish part of her felt that if Draco got this out of his system now then perhaps they could move on from this. And she stubbornly wanted to prove that she could listen to her flaws without getting defensive, like Draco always did.

"You keep secrets. You're always trying to change people. You think that if people aren't as good as your parents than they are automatically bad. You've become extremely wishy washy. You can't let people have emotions without lecturing them on it." Draco was running out of breath and running out of things to say. "You're too reliant on others and when they aren't perfect you get angry. Which is what is happening right now."

"I'm angry for a lot of reasons." Eleanor bit out, ignoring all he had said about her flawed character (though she knew she would dwell on them later and probably every moment after). "The truth is, Draco, that I am extremely embarrassed to be associated with someone who is cruel to those around him. What kind of friend does that make me? What kind of person does that make me?"

"You care too much about what others think." Draco added to the list. The amount of times she called him cruel was unfortunately not enough to reduce the sting of the words. If all-forgiving Eleanor thought he was cruel, he was inclined to believe her.

"I care about the way other people feel. Outside of me and apparently Bridget now, you don't make people feel good."

"Enough about Bridget, you jealous little-" Draco yelled but stopped himself short. It still caused Eleanor to shrink back into the bed. He had never yelled at her like that before. They'd always partaken in arguments, and more recently, those arguments got quite heated. Both were guilty of raising their voices, but his intention behind these words was different. He saw the fear in her eyes, it was the same fear, he was sure, that was in his eyes whenever his father yelled at him. Which, granted, wasn't often, but was often enough to have lasting impressions. "El, I'm so sorry." He immediately rushed to her side and tried to sit next to her. "I shouldn't have yelled like that I'm so sorry."

His eyes were changed. He was a different man sitting in front of her, his hands holding hers. Eleanor's heart ached, she wished that he could always be this man. Her heart softened and she put her palm on his cheek. She wanted to sob. She was terribly lonely and she missed her best friend, but she couldn't give in because he showed a sliver of kindness, a sliver of regret

"I think we both have a lot of work to do on ourselves." She let out in barely a whisper. Draco hung his head in anguish. He knew her forgiveness was not so easily won. He was so frustrated by her and by himself. He wasn't sure how to make peace with either. All he knew was that he wanted to be with Eleanor more than anyone else.

"What does that mean for us?" He asked in a small voice. Eleanor was reminded of the young boy she once knew, so unsure and insecure of who he was and where he stood.

"I-I don't quite know." Eleanor admitted. "I don't think there can be an us right now. For a while." She regretting saying it the moment it left her lips. She missed him so badly that she ached. But it had been going downhill since the moment they left London in September and she just delayed the hurt. She knew that until they were both different people they would always have something to fight about.

Draco was quiet for a long time before finally taking a breath. "Come back home." He whispered. Eleanor nodded once and got up from the bed, put out the fire and walked with Draco to the Floo. He watched her walk, noticing again how very hollow and sad she was. He was determined to be different for her, he would have to be. She was too proud to take him any other way.

The pair quickly realized upon entering the Malfoy Manor that there were more people present than were expected. Instinctively Eleanor was embarrassed about how she was fresh out of bed but when she saw the ghoulishly pale face under a wild mop of black curls standing next to Draco's mother, her embarrassment turned to intense fear.

Through gritted teeth, Narcissa forced out: "Draco, you remember your aunt, don't you?"


	20. Chapter 20

**Quick** **Note: **Hey all! Here's the next installment after the little surprise ending of last week's chapter! Looking forward to hearing what you're all thinking of this!

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Lucius Malfoy had a terrible secret that had been eating him alive for nearly seven months. Only one other soul in the world knew the awful betrayal he had orchestrated and helped to commit. He couldn't look at Eleanor or his son for fear of revealing all of his dark and twisted ways. He wished he had been different, he wished he had not been so easily manipulated, so afraid. He was a coward. He couldn't touch Narcissa, and his loving and merciful wife had taken notice. He resigned to shutting himself in his study where he drank to forget or sobbed because he still remembered. But at least he was alone, at least he wasn't hurting Narcissa or Draco or Eleanor any more than he already had, unbeknownst to them.

He had been doing okay for a while. His terrible and awful secret would die with him - whether that be sooner or later, he couldn't be sure. Selfishly, he hoped it was sooner, but for the sake of his family, he was fighting to redeem himself and keep them safe. Draco would do better than him, Draco would be better. He had to be, otherwise what was this all for?

But then in the parlor of his home stood the one and only person who knew what he did - who had helped him do it. He tried to hide his shock and his absolute fear from his wife and her sister but he couldn't.

"Bellatrix." He gasped out.

"Lucius, I'm sorry, she didn't have any place to go, I couldn't just let her go into the wild and try to survive." Narcissa's eyes were full of tears. "I thought you would know what to do."

"How...why?" Lucius ignored his wife and only stared at his accomplice who was looking more unhinged with each passing moment. His only thought was that he needed to get this lunatic out of his home before she blew his cover.

"The Dark Lord provides for his most faithful servants. You should know that very well." Bellatrix smirked, she loved to watch him squirm. Her brother-in-law had a weak point, and it was his affection for his family. She knew he hadn't told them, otherwise her sweet as honey sister wouldn't still be living with him. "I suppose I'm free to be out for good now."

"You've been out before?" Narcissa asked suddenly, looking at her sister incredulously. Narcissa was simultaneously overjoyed and petrified to see her sister. She hadn't felt a close female bond since Olga died, but Bellatrix was no Olga and Narcissa feared what her presence meant for her family and the rise of the Dark Lord, which she was trying desperately to ignore.

"Lucius knows." Bellatrix smiled maliciously. "Ask him about it later."

Narcissa looked at Lucius in shock. The two didn't have secrets, not since the first war, or at least that is what she thought. They had agreed to keep each other accountable, for Draco. And now they felt responsible for Eleanor too, though she wasn't legally theirs.

"What do you want us to do with you, Bella? You surely don't expect us to let you stay here." Lucius spit out. Narcissa wanted to protest but with the secret outings that her sister and husband seemed to share, she couldn't be sure that she wanted her sister around either.

"I just need some resources to take to Him. He can't quite do what he does best just yet considering the whole world still thinks he is dead, it's best to keep it that way." All three knew who she was speaking of.

"You're staying with him?" Narcissa asked, fear clutching her heart as she realized their proximity to the Dark Lord.

"I'm staying with Wormtail, actually, while Snape is at Hogwarts." She rolled her eyes in disgust. "Little bugger is really going to get on my nerves." Lucius eyed her suspiciously. "Don't worry dear Lucius, I'll still keep up appearances at the hospital like you asked."

"Hospital? Lucius what is going on?" Narcissa demanded, crossing her arms.

"I will explain it all later. Bellatrix needs to collect her things and go before Draco and Eleanor wake up."

"The orphan girl is here?" Bellatrix asked in surprise. "Well that changes things."

"You cannot stay." Lucius said firmly.

"You can't refuse an order from the Dark Lord. He and I will talk about this."

After gathering her resources - mostly potions and old texts and current newspapers and Narcissa's most expensive dresses - Bellatrix and Narcissa stood in the parlor. Narcissa was hoping to ask her sister questions before she disappeared again, but the fireplace roared green before she got the chance.

Out of immediate fear, Eleanor grabbed Draco's hand and stood behind him when she saw Bellatrix holding hands with Narcissa.

"Draco, you remember your aunt, don't you?"

"I don't remember her, sorry." Draco said stiffly. He was immediately furious with his parents for letting a criminal into their home despite the fact she was technically family. He wanted to shove Eleanor back through the Floo and have them disappear until she was gone and he felt he could safely question his parents.

"Aw, Cissy, you didn't tell me they were in love." Bellatrix cooed in a mocking voice. Eleanor felt a sharp shiver go down her spine at the shrillness but tried to remain brave.

"I really think you should go." Narcissa said firmly. "And don't come back." All affection for her sister was waning at the sight of the absolute fear in the eyes of the children.

"That's not really up to you, is it?" Bellatrix snipped, but spared another glance at Eleanor before Disapparating and leaving a palpable tension in the room in her wake. For a long, torturous moment, no one spoke. Narcissa felt cold at the entire encounter; her husband's dishonesty and her sister's reminder that there was now an ever present commander looming over their heads, to the fear Draco and Eleanor displayed.

"What was she doing here?" Draco asked lowly, still holding Eleanor's hand, who was frozen at the sight of an actual Death Eater whose presence had tarnished a once safe haven.

"She just showed up." Narcissa mumbled out. "I haven't seen her in almost 15 years."

"You didn't invite her?" Draco demanded.

"Of course not." Narcissa snapped. "I don't want her here. I didn't realize she was popping to and from wherever she wanted. I figured she was in hiding."

"I don't think I should stay here." Eleanor piped up quietly. "I don't feel safe with Death Eaters popping in." Her heart hurt to say it, she knew Narcissa wanted her there more than anything but Eleanor's heart was beating rapidly. She didn't even want to be in her home. For the first time, she ached for the feeling of protection that the Order of the Phoenix provided; she ached for Remus.

Narcissa ignored her dropping heart when she thought of Lucius and his dancing skull and snake that neither Draco nor Eleanor knew existed. She wished things were different. She wished she didn't understand where Eleanor was coming from. She wanted to get out of the house too. She had no idea what the future had in store and she couldn't expose Eleanor to that reality. She only hoped that she would take Draco with her.

Narcissa nodded her head solemnly. "I just don't want you to be alone." She breathed out.

Eleanor felt obligated to the Malfoys, and more than that, she genuinely loved them. Even Draco, especially Draco. No more than five minutes ago she would have invited them all to stay with her if it meant keeping them safe, however after seeing Bellatrix Lestrange in the parlor of what felt like her second home, she was now unsure of whether or not she could trust them. Would she leave Draco behind with them and whatever Death Eater popped into the Manor while she shacked up with the Order, or would she and Draco live in her parent's castle after they had just decided to be involved less?

To Draco, the idea of staying with just Eleanor was perfect. It's how he would win her back! He could use this month to remind her of how at peace the two had been over the summer, but his heart dropped when he realized how greatly she was puzzling over what to do with him.

"I think I'm going to stay with some friends for a few days. I'll come by on Christmas." Eleanor let out quietly, causing both Narcissa and Draco to hurt - only in different ways. Draco wanted to convince her to stay, but in his heart, he didn't want to argue with her anymore. He knew she was right to leave. Narcissa looked as though she might cry as Eleanor shakily walked back into the fireplace.

Draco felt loss, Narcissa felt as though she had failed, and in some dank corner of the Malfoy Manor, Lucius sat alone, feeling both.

* * *

Eleanor took a few moments to herself before joining the Order to regain her thoughts and control her wildly beating heart. Her immediate reaction was the need to tell the Order about Bellatrix's appearance in the Malfoy home, however once she thought that through she realized that meant raids on the Manor and the Malfoys realizing they couldn't trust her. Selfishly and perhaps destructively, Eleanor wanted to be able to go back to Draco, if he did decide to change his ways. She didn't want to close that door forever by selling out his parents for harboring escaped criminals.

Seeing Bellatrix Lestrange in real life had turned Eleanor's blood cold. More than confirm the proximity of the war, it sent her spiraling in anxiety for the stability of the Malfoys. They were good, Eleanor knew this to be true. She felt like she was betraying them by thinking - even for a moment - that they might slip back into their old ways. But still, she worried. She fretted over them and while she knew she was making the best decision by removing herself from the Manor, she wouldn't rest easy until she was able to see them again and confirm their lack of connection to He Who Must Not Be Named.

It took Eleanor awhile to muster up the courage to finally arrive at Grimmauld Place. It was a place she felt slightly unwelcome, given her connections and the lack of invite to join Dumbledore's Army. But Remus, ever steadfast and kind, welcomed Eleanor with a wide smile and loving embrace.

"We weren't expecting you this early." Remus stated in a quiet voice as Mrs. Weasley called up the stairs for Harry, Ron and Hermione. "Is everything alright?"

Eleanor didn't know how to respond to that, she stared into her father's eyes. In him, she found a friend, protection, love. She felt safe. "Things just weren't what I was expecting at the Manor." Eleanor said simply.

"Are you safe?" Remus asked with concern at her vagueness.

Eleanor nodded once and leaned into his hug once more. She needed to believe she was safe with the Malfoys; that her leaving was just a precaution. Who were the Malfoys if not her greatest protection and allies? Eleanor didn't know that she could live in a world where the Malfoys didn't protect her like she was their own. She pushed that thought far from her head and greeted Hermione and Harry and Ron with a smile.

"I'll leave you four be." Remus bowed out gracefully.

"Is everything okay?" Hermione asked, putting a gentle hand on Eleanor's shoulders.

"I uh," Eleanor looked at her shoes and shifted uncomfortably. "I just couldn't really be around Draco right now." Eleanor let out, which was partly true.

"Oh," Hermione let out. She sounded relieved until she picked up on Eleanor's discomfort and obvious sadness at the fact. "I'm sorry." She supplied lamely as they began walking towards the girls' rooms.

"No, you're not." Eleanor snapped quickly, tired of insincerity and falsehoods from her friends. "But thanks."

"I," Hermione started, unsure of how to respond to Eleanor's uncharacteristic shortness.

"Just be honest with me. Please. You don't have to invite me to every meeting or include me in every conversation. Just don't hide things from me. That sucks."

"We thought you'd tell Malfoy." Ron piped up.

"I know that's what you thought, and you have to know that I won't. Your business isn't his business."

"Then I suppose Malfoy's business isn't our business either?" Harry asked.

"Not that he has much business that would interest you anyway, but I'm not a gossip, so no." Eleanor sucked in a deep breath and looked at her friends. "I think I need to explain myself a bit more to all of you as well. Do you think we could talk a little later, all of us, in private?"

Harry, Ron, and Hermione nodded, all feeling relief at the disconnect they had been feeling coming to a close.

Once the adults retired, Ginny, Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Hermione and Eleanor all piled into Fred and George's room, which they put a silencing charm on and revealed several alcohol bottles.

"The only way we know how to cheer Eleanor up." Fred smiled mischievously, handing her a bottle of her favorite drink, which she took with a look of gratitude.

"I haven't been completely open with you all recently," Eleanor started, looking at the bottle in her hands, "which has been really stupid of me."

"No!" Hermione interrupted quickly. "We haven't been receptive or supportive either." Eleanor didn't deny this fact, but still smiled gratefully for Hermione's assistance.

"So, basically for this entire school year up until a few weeks ago Draco and I had been...not dating exactly, but-"

"Snogging each other in the dark hallways every night?" George provided.

"We know." Fred concluded.

"Y-you knew?" Eleanor asked for clarification.

"You are not that stealthy, Eleanor." Fred laughed, and Eleanor was shocked to find everyone nodding in agreement.

"We just didn't want to embarrass you. Or make you feel bad." Ginny explained.

"Well I did sometimes, but Hermione told me to let you sort things out." Ron added in.

"Okay, well maybe this one will surprise you," Eleanor sucked in a breath, half amused at her poorly kept secret, and half annoyed that no one talked to her about it. "Remus is my biological father."

"I knew that one already, was it a secret?" Harry asked.

"You didn't think she was keeping it quiet, but yet you didn't tell me?" Hermione questioned loudly. "How come you didn't think it was a secret and yet you said nothing?"

"I thought everyone sort of knew, I didn't really need to talk about it." Harry shrugged. "Really, no one else thought it was suspicious that Eleanor was getting letters from Remus consistently?"

"I didn't know she was getting letters from Remus..." Ginny huffed, not liking not being in the know.

"How come Harry and Hermione knew before me?" Ron spoke up.

"Apparently Harry just thought everyone knew." Hermione threw her hands up in frustration. "Honestly, I sleep two feet away from her and just found this out a few weeks ago."

"Well you all were able to keep Dumbledore's Army from me for months!" Eleanor put in.

"That was a secret too?" Harry asked.

"Yes, she was going to tell Draco." Ron answered quickly. "But how is Remus your dad?"

"I'm still very confused on how you all knew about Draco and I had no idea you knew?" Eleanor put in, all of the chatter rising loudly in the room as they all tried talking over each other.

"The hickeys were truly ridiculous, Eleanor." Hermione mentioned off hand.

"Legendary." George added quietly.

"Why was I the last to know?" Ron continued to whine. "That's really cool shit, Eleanor, and you just told Harry and Hermione."

"You were the hardest on Draco, so it makes sense." Ginny answered her brother.

"I meant the Lupin thing," Ron rolled his eyes at Ginny, "and Eleanor was the hardest on Draco, she broke his damn heart."

"I broke his heart?" Eleanor clarified incredulously, but still cracked a slight smile despite the subject matter.

"My heart is broken that Harry didn't share a damn thing with me!" Hermione called over the group. "I can understand Eleanor not telling me, but Harry not telling me? Honestly?"

"Hermione, drop it, he's dimwitted, we all know this. He probably just forgot." Ron joked, nudging Harry and laughing.

"I'm going to be honest, I kind of did." Harry chuckled, causing the group to go into an uproar of laughter.

Eleanor continued to drink and share in some long overdue joy with her friends.

By the time Eleanor realized she had drank far too much, it was too late. She was very focused on not mentioning Bellatrix Lestrange's appearance at the Manor that her protection of some of her other secrets started to let slip.

"Harry Potter, you made out with Cho Chang?" Eleanor nearly screeched out when Ron hinted at it through a thinly veiled joke.

"Oh, the things you miss when you sneak off to the Astronomy Tower every other night." Harry laughed in return. Eleanor opened her mouth to protest, as she wasn't seeing Draco at the time the kiss occurred, however she was too embarrassed to admit to her friends that she was sneaking out in vain to see someone who was sleeping with another girl.

"That's not an excuse not to tell me." Eleanor huffed.

"I'm not a gossip." Harry repeated Eleanor's words from earlier which caused her to grind her teeth in annoyance.

"What even happened with Draco? Like the full details." Hermione asked, even when intoxicated she sounded unnecessarily judgemental. However, Eleanor was drunk enough not to care and sad enough to want to confide in someone about the past few months of pain.

Through her intoxication she knew she shouldn't - couldn't - indulge everything, but her frustration with Draco and her confusion about her own feelings made it easier for her to crack.

"Uh, well," Eleanor started, taking another long chug of her drink, nearly emptying her bottle. "I guess we started to be uhh, romantically involved in the summer. I was worried about the school year and he was convinced it would be fine because I was an expert at balancing things. We got to school, all my fears were right and he ended up acting like an even bigger prick than before and now I'm sad but I was right." Eleanor shrugged. "You can all say 'I told you so'." Everyone went eerily quiet.

"Why did you leave the Manor early?" Hermione asked slowly.

Eleanor took a breath and focused solely on not mentioning Bellatrix. "Um, we got in an argument."

"I feel like you argue a lot." Ron pointed out. "What made this one so bad?"

"Ron." Hermione hissed.

"No, no." Eleanor waved off. "He's right. We did argue a lot. This one was just," Eleanor sighed. "He's sleeping with someone else so…" Eleanor trailed off.

"Well he is a prick who sleeps with other people and won't talk to you in the day time, so what is the attraction?" Ron pressed.

"I wish you all could see what he was like over the summer. Or in private."

"We don't need to see that," Ron waved the thoughts of Draco intimate with one of his closest friends away from his head.

"I wish he acted that way all the time. That's what we would argue about. He puts on a show for everyone else to seem tough."

"Or maybe he puts on a show for you." Harry suggested with venom in his tone.

"No, no." Eleanor shook her head rapidly, making herself dizzy for a moment before regaining herself. "I don't believe that's true. He still has to figure himself out. He needs to choose who he is gonna be. I'm just waiting for him to make the right choice."

"What if he doesn't?" Hermione asked.

Eleanor didn't want to think of that. She didn't want to think of Lucius and Narcissa turning back into Death Eaters. She didn't want to think about the people that loved her the greatest after the death of her parents being the opposite of what she always believed. "I can't control people." Eleanor let out. "He'll do whatever he wants. I don't make much of a difference to him."


	21. Chapter 21

**Quick Note: **Hey friends, the holidays have been nuts and my updating schedule completely got away from me! So here is this chapter with the next chapter following very shortly to get us back on track! I know this one is a little shorter, but there is lots of good info in here! Thanks for sticking with me! Let me know what you think!

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Eleanor hadn't been hungover since she couldn't remember when, but at the table surrounded by a large chunk of the Order, she realized exactly how much she hadn't missed this side effect. Over the summer she had her father's potions to get her by, and while Eleanor was sure there were similar potions somewhere in Grimmauld Place, she was too ashamed to ask.

"You doing alright?" Remus nudged her in good humor as Eleanor pushed the scrambled eggs around on her plate with nausea clear on her face.

"Peachy." Eleanor responded with a close lipped smile. Fred and George chuckled madly from across the table at Eleanor's obvious struggling, which deepened Eleanor's shame. But she couldn't bring herself to regret drinking the night before. After so long of feeling miserable and not like herself, she felt like she had taken control of her emotions again. And it wasn't because of the drinking, it was the carelessness. Eleanor had been longing to feel it since the moment her parents died and she had been searching for it endlessly. It felt good to let some of the Draco situation off of her chest.

It wasn't until early afternoon that Eleanor stopped feeling the need to constantly search for a bathroom just in case she needed to empty her stomach. Luckily, she never did. She found a quiet study to get away from the havoc that was embodied by Grimmauld Place, and snoozed off and on while reading bits of a Muggle book she had found amongst the bookshelves.

"How's the hangover?" Remus' voice chuckled lightly from the doorway. Eleanor felt her face light up in an embarrassed blaze as she sat on the window seat.

"What do you mean?" She tried to be unknowing, as she kept staring at the pages before her.

"Molly is convinced Ginny would never drink underage, so by association, you all are safe. But I know a hangover when I see one." His voice was full of humor. Eleanor couldn't imagine her parents ever thinking her drinking heavily would ever be funny, so Remus' apparent amusement confused her.

"You're not … angry?" Eleanor tried to gage, her eyebrows knit together in confusion and disbelief.

"I'm not thrilled, but I also don't feel as though you and I have a relationship where I can reprimand you in anyway. You're a teenager. I can assure you that Sirius, James, Peter and I did much worse when we were your age."

"So you're basically saying I'm free of consequences now?" Eleanor chuckled. "Above the law."

Remus laughed as he sat beside her and put an arm around her shoulders. "Not that I expect to be a person in your life you can give you consequences, but let's just try to not get too ahead of ourselves."

Eleanor took a moment to lean into Remus. She enjoyed this connection with him. They still felt partly unsure of what to think of each other. They had been getting closer since their first dinner excursion. Obviously close enough for her to seek refuge with him, however something still felt fragile and tentative between them.

"Darling, can I ask why you came here so early?" Remus asked quietly. "Can I ask for honesty?"

"I told you before," Eleanor started, "things at the Manor are just...different."

"Is it because of that Malfoy boy? I'm not trying to be snoopy, I just overheard Harry and them talking about the two of you and I don't know what I'm supposed to do about it, as your father." Remus let out. Eleanor smiled at his support and pushed herself closer to him.

"I appreciate it, Remus, really." Eleanor chuckled and put a hand on his arm to calm him. "If I'm being honest, my parents and I always spent Christmas with the Malfoys and when it's the same Christmas traditions, it's very obvious to see what's missing. I needed a complete change, and I didn't want it to be my first Christmas season alone, I wanted to remember it as my first Christmas with you."

Remus' eyes were wet and he smiled widely. "Eleanor, I'm so sorry for the pain you have endured. I don't want you to think I'm trying to replace your parents, but having you in my life has brought me so much joy."

"You've brought me a lot of joy too, Remus." Eleanor smiled. "Thank you."

"Eleanor," Harry stuck his head into the room from the hallway, "can we talk to you for a second?"

Eleanor gave another smile to Remus before following Harry out of the room. He led her up the stairs to the overcrowded room that most of the kids were staying in. It was an absolute mess, especially after the night before. There were some mattresses on the floor and hardly any walking space for people's trunks and piles of clothes.

In the room was Fred, George, Ginny, Hermione, and Ron. All staring happily at Eleanor.

"We have been very unwelcoming to you," Hermione started, "and that wasn't fair of us. We are going to work harder at letting you do what you want to do with whoever you would like to do it without any judgement."

"Without excessive judgement." Ron corrected lightly, which caused Eleanor to roll her eyes with a small laugh.

"We trust you, and we love you a lot. We really want you to be apart of Dumbledore's Army." Hermione insisted, everyone was nodding in agreement.

"We miss you there." Harry put in.

Ginny handed her the quill and parchment. "Please?" She asked.

Eleanor, who had been so afraid of being unwanted, felt the love now. So much so that she gave in and signed the parchment with a large smile on her face.

* * *

"Lucius Malfoy, you tell me what is going on this minute!" Narcissa demanded, flying into her husband's study after Draco had turned in for the night. She had waited all night so as not to alarm her son, but the fear, betrayal and dishonesty had been eating at her and boiled down to raging anger.

Lucius, who had been nursing whiskey all day, looked up at his wife under drooping eyelids. "My love-" He sputtered out.

"Don't!" She yelled, "Do not sweet talk me. You have been nonexistent in this household since the summer. Until earlier today I had convinced myself it was sadness about the passing of your best friend, but now I'm thinking otherwise. What are you keeping from me? What are you and my sister up to?"

"Cissa, I-" Lucius let out a small, drunken burp, "He's back. And he's making me do things that I can't tell you about."

Narcissa lunged across his desk and grabbed him by the collar. Blind rage was fueling her every move. "You and I made a vow to each other nearly 20 years ago that we were in this together, for better or for worse. It's worse Lucius, we're in this together."

"Narcissa-"

"We made another vow, six years after our first one, over the crib of our darling boy, that we would never keep things from each other. You are slipping. If you think I'm going to let you get away with this, you will be sorely mistaken."

"Let me speak." Lucius bit out, shaking off his wife's hands. Her glare was hard, making him shrink under her knowing gaze. He had been cooped up all day; drinking and thinking about how to talk himself out of this. He knew, now, looking at his outraged wife, that he couldn't.

"He wanted them, Olga and Darius, from the beginning. Our seemingly neutral friends were putting large heaps of money into the Order of the Phoenix. They were trying to be anonymous, but The Dark Lord has his ways of knowing. He was going to kill them if they didn't join, he was going to kill Eleanor. I tried to warn them." Lucius took a breath. "They didn't want my help, they turned me away. The Dark Lord, in an attempt to motivate me to motivate them orchestrated a legally binding document that Eleanor be betrothed to Draco should he ever become a Death Eater - securing both of their loyalties to Him. He was always planning to kill them, giving us full custody of Eleanor, and therefore being able to ensure her marriage to Draco, and her allegiance to the Dark Lord, as well as her funds.

"They changed their will to ensure Eleanor has full custody of herself, they did this secretly and very last minute, so I didn't know. But, of course, the Dark Lord knew. I was to put them under the Imperius curse and have them legally recognize Draco and Eleanor's betrothal and give it priority over their will. Bellatrix took me by surprise in the Department of Mysteries and killed them right before my eyes. She's since been making frequent trips to the hospital to Obliviate any doctor that gives a cause of death."

Narcissa gulped and took several steps back before falling into an armchair, clutching her heart.

"I don't understand." She let out nearly silently after a few moments. "Eleanor and Draco are betrothed?"

"Only if Draco becomes a Death Eater." Lucius amended. "Which will only happen if I fail." He clicked his tongue quietly. "What motivation."

"Why would the Dark Lord want her?" Narcissa puzzled.

"Her money, her name being tied to his. The Cordarris have been one of the wealthiest and most influential families for nearly a millennium. I think we tend to forget this because of how humble Olga and Darius were."

"But the will says-"

"The will doesn't matter if her and Draco are betrothed. I _made _them sign the document stating it." Lucius let out, drunk and halfway insane.

"Draco won't become a Death Eater. He wouldn't ever chose that."

"I thought so too. I found solace in that. But the two fell in love. The Dark Lord knows that. He will give Draco a choice, watch Eleanor die, or become a Death Eater. What do you think he is going to choose?" Lucius took another drink from his glass. Narcissa took it from his hands to take a long chug for herself.

"The moment I die, or get shipped to Azkaban, Draco and Eleanor's fates are sealed."


	22. Chapter 22

**Little Note: **Hello all! Happy holidays! Hope that however, wherever, and with whomever you celebrate, that you are surrounded by joy and light and love. Here is a little Christmas celebration chapter! Sending love to you and yours!

* * *

It was with reluctance and anxiety that Eleanor left Grimmauld Place on Christmas Eve to attend the traditional dinner with the Malfoys. She had their perfectly wrapped gifts piled in her arms, and a woolen coat draped over her turtleneck clad shoulders. Mrs. Weasley had insisted with the argument that the Malfoy Manor had to be drafty with all of that extra space.

"Will you be coming back tonight, dear?" Mrs. Weasley asked at the Floo, patting Eleanor's cheek affectionately.

"I expect so, but don't wait up." Eleanor informed. Hermione shot her friend a look over Mrs. Weasley's shoulder. She was asking with her eyes what Eleanor was planning on doing so late. Eleanor rolled her eyes in response and shook her head slightly for only Hermione to see. "We have a whole evening tradition, and I expect Narcissa is going to go all out this year." Eleanor did, for the record, believe that Narcissa was going to have a large meal waiting and the inside of her home would be decorated and she would fit in Malfoy and Cordarri traditions all night. Eleanor was dreading the whole affair, another reminder that the Christmases past were over forever and no matter how hard Narcissa tried, that wouldn't change.

"I'll wait up." Remus insisted, putting a gentle hand on his daughter's shoulder.

"No, no. Santa won't come if you're awake." Eleanor offered a smile. This light joking brought a smile to Hermione's face. It had been so long since she had seen her friend cracking jokes. Everyone else present simply rolled their eyes. "I will be here in the morning."

With a smile to everyone surrounding the Floo, Eleanor made her way to Malfoy Manor. To her surprise, the only one waiting for her on the other side was Draco. The house was decorated but none of the lights were on and the candles weren't lit. There was no smell coming from the kitchen that indicated dinner was ready. Draco silently took her packages from her hands and arranged them under the already large stack of presents under the Malfoy's obscenely large tree.

"Where are your parents?" Eleanor asked quietly as Draco took her coat from her shoulders and hung it on the coat rack that stood by the fireplace.

"They've been gone a few days, I don't know where." Draco admitted lamely, looking at his feet with his hands shoved in his pockets. Eleanor had to look away for fear of her heart betraying her for recognizing how absolutely handsome he was.

"Will they be back tonight?" Eleanor questioned.

"I thought they might be, but..." Draco trailed off. "I tried to get everything set up on time, but dinner will be late. I didn't know when to tell the House Elves to start. And the lights, I couldn't figure out how to get them all connected properly and-" Eleanor grabbed Draco's arm lightly.

"It's beautiful, Draco. Thank you." The two held each other's eyes for a moment, sharing a soft moment of peace that each craved equally. "What's for dinner?"

"I don't have the planning skills of my mother, so please don't have high expectations." Draco chuckled. "I have stuffed mushrooms in the oven and some rice on the stove. Very minimal."

"Sounds delicious." Eleanor complimented. "Let's see if we can't figure out these lights."

The pair worked together for awhile, chatting mindlessly about their respective breaks. Apparently Draco had been left alone for the majority of his, which made Eleanor feel slightly guilty for leaving him to himself in the big house. However, a part of her felt that if he wasn't in danger, some solitary time might do him some good for self reflection.

After nearly half an hour of rewrapping the wire lights and plugging them into each other in various combinations, the entire parlor lit up in a beautiful light show. "Got it." Eleanor smiled, looking at each twinkling orb with a sense of wonder.

"El," Draco asked softly. "Can I be honest with you for a second?"

Eleanor tucked her legs under her chin as she looked at her childhood best friend, turned possible first love, and most complicated and also simple part of her life. "I'd be extremely grateful if you were."

Draco gave her a small, regretful smile and ran his large hands through his hair as he took a seat on the floor beside her and the tree. "I want every Christmas to be like this." Eleanor just stared at him. Waves of emotions washing over her. She knew what he meant and there was a part of her that felt the same way, but she was also angry with him for attempting to make amends after playing with her emotions so viciously and carelessly for the past few months. "I want it to be you and me, figuring out lights and talking about our lives. Just being together."

"We can't talk like this." Eleanor shook her head. "Not after...everything." She avoided saying Bridget, given how poorly it was received during their last conversation.

"I get that, I really do. I'm going to change." Draco scooted towards her to grab her hands.

"I've heard that before." Eleanor leaned away from Draco's promises. "I need to actually see it."

"I know." Draco nodded. "And you will." He paused a moment. "Can I ask you for one thing?" Eleanor knew what he was going to ask for before he did. She knew him too well and if they were feeling the same longing in their chest, then she was expecting what was coming. "Can I kiss you again? Just once? I won't ask again, you kiss me next when you're ready."

Eleanor could not deny she wanted to kiss him. Despite his cruelty, despite the Inquisitorial Squad, despite his distance, his friends, his beliefs towards her dearest friends, despite even Bridget. She wanted to feel his lips on hers again. It felt like it was the seal to his promise. She gave the slightest nod. It felt like the air had left the room as the two closed the gap between them.

Eleanor felt as though she wanted to cry when Draco's lips brushed hers gently. She was so damn mad at him. She had been left alone, to be the fool. He had taken advantage of her and flipped a switch once school started, as she always suspected. But they met each other with this kiss and she hoped this was turning the page. She was choosing to trust that he would change, but also choosing to wait to give any more of her heart to him until he did.

She didn't want to stop kissing him. She didn't want to wait until he was different. She kept her lips firmly attached to his, surprising Draco. This wasn't what he expected when he asked for this kiss. He also didn't expect to feel her tears against his cheek, but he understood why. He knew he hurt her and, Merlin, he was so ready to change.

Something in him snapped after he yelled at her. It was the worst feeling in the world, then to have her be so afraid of his family that she had to leave. He felt at his lowest when he was causing his best friend to fear and to hurt. So he kissed her, he kissed her passionately to promise that it wouldn't be that way again.

"Why did you do that to me, Draco?" Eleanor asked in between kisses as Draco began trailing kisses down her neck, whispering apologies. He intertwined their fingers and didn't let his lips leave her skin, convinced this still counted as one kiss.

"I won't hurt you again." Draco promised, kissing Eleanor's palm as she looked down at him, tears making her eyes glisten. "I won't. I'm going to take care of you."

That's when it hit them, the smell of smoke wafting strongly from the kitchen, causing Draco to curse and Eleanor to chuckle a little before wiping her eyes. "Why didn't the House Elves catch it?" Eleanor wondered, following Draco to a smoke filled kitchen where dark clouds billowed out of the oven and the pot on the stove, leaving all contents completely inedible.

"I, uh, dismissed them for the night. It's Christmas." He shrugged sheepishly. "I, obviously, am not very good at multitasking." He sighed heavily. "Our Christmas dinner is ruined."

Eleanor started to wave towels in the kitchen to dismiss the smoke as Draco disposed of the burnt food. He tried to salvage it for a desperate moment, but it was too late. Eleanor assured him that the gesture was not lost, and insisted the two walk find a take away restaurant that was open somewhere near Diagon Alley. They eventually found a pizza place after walking the cold streets of London for a while, chatting and joking in a way that felt familiar and simple.

"Why aren't your parents home?" Eleanor asked quietly as the pair waited for their take out box of cheese pizza to be ready. The employees looked annoyed at their presence and Eleanor felt a stab of guilt for them. She hoped their simple order would be quick and painless.

"I honestly don't know." Draco breathed out, shoving his hands further in his jacket pocket. "I think it has something to do with my aunt being back. The two of them were very on edge around me and one morning I woke up to a note saying they would be out of town for a bit."

"How are you feeling about your aunt being back?" Eleanor put a gentle hand in the crook of his elbow.

"I feel like everything is going to fall apart with her here." He muttered, shaking negative thoughts from his head. "But for now, we'll eat pizza and open gifts."

With the box in hand the two marched back to the nearest Floo, keeping each other laughing and Eleanor destructively hoping that this was what the future held for them. They sat in front of the fire eating their now half cold pizza and sipping on drinks that Draco had expertly mixed up.

"So where are you staying again?" Draco asked, wiping grease off of his fingers and lips with a napkin.

"With Remus." Eleanor responded. "And the Weasleys, and Harry, and Hermione and whoever else decides to stop by." She added with a chuckle. "It's been good. There's been a disconnect with us recently and it's healthy for me to be around them for us to fix it." She took a long sip of her sweet drink. "And it's really nice to be around Remus for a long period of time."

"How's that all been going?" Draco pondered cautiously, not sure how he should go about responding to her new father.

"He's wonderful. He's so understanding of how weird this all is, and it's just really nice to get to know him." Eleanor looked down at her hands in contemplation. "I-uh, nevermind." Eleanor laughed at her own thoughts and took a long swing of her drink. She wondered idly what Remus would think if she came back drunk on Christmas, especially after her stunt earlier in the break. He would wonder who raised her, he would judge her parents, judge the Malfoys, judge her. Sirius might think it was cool though.

"No, tell me." Draco insisted. He was genuinely interested in her thoughts. They'd spent the better part of the school year not sharing what was on their mind, and that led to their untimely demise. Draco wanted to rebuild their foundation, the friendship. "I want to know."

"You just want me to kiss you again." Eleanor chuckled. She wasn't wrong. "I really love spending time with him, and with his friends. I've been accepted into another family, and it feels wonderful, but…" Eleanor trailed, "I feel unfaithful, I don't know." She shook her head to clear her thoughts out.

"Unfaithful?" Draco repeated. He knew the feeling. Bridget was that feeling personified for him, but he couldn't imagine Eleanor feeling that way about anything. She hadn't ever done anyone wrong they way he had done her wrong.

"Yeah, it's just how I feel." Eleanor shrugged, the tiniest lump lodged itself in her throat and she took a deep breath to clear it. "It feels like I should be mourning my parents forever. And I still miss them, every day, but there are glimpses of joy, and I feel guilty for letting it in sometimes."

Draco didn't know what to say to this, he couldn't begin to comprehend where Eleanor was coming from because he had never been in a situation of this weight. "I think your parents would want you to let it in." He let out softly, believing very strongly that it was true. "Don't you want that?" Eleanor nodded her head slowly and gave him a sweet smile. He had told her exactly what she needed to hear.

"I want to open gifts." She smiled, shaking the sadness that had collected in her shoulders. She crawled over to the tree and plucked Draco's wrapped gift from beneath the pines.

"I'm surprised you even got me anything." Draco admitted.

"You know how much I love Christmas and gifts." Eleanor laughed, shoving the parcel into his hands. "Besides I bought it before...everything." Draco had bought her gift after _everything _as a way to make things up to her, though sitting here now, in all her glory, he didn't think it would do the trick.

Draco took the box and unwrapped the flawless wrapping gently. He could feel Eleanor squirm in anticipation next to him, he liked to make her wait, but she hated keeping her gifts a secret for longer than they had to be.

In the package he found a pair of high quality Quidditch gloves, a broom care kit, and a fine pocket watch, encrusted with an emerald.

"El, this is-" He breathed out, she'd always gotten him nice gifts, but the pocket watch looked ancient, and expensive, but it felt like it was supposed to belong to him. "This is amazing." Eleanor was beaming at his reaction, nothing filled her with is as much joy as giving a gift she knew someone else would love. Draco looked down into the box again, and found an envelope with his name written perfectly in Eleanor's loopy handwriting.

"Read that later." Eleanor insisted, following his gaze to the letter she had written a few days prior, Draco nodded in compliance.

"El, I really appreciate this." Draco said sincerely, holding her hand tightly in his own. Eleanor felt a pang of longing. She wished the two of them could exist alone in the world, no outside forces or sadness. She wished every day was a quiet Christmas, with no other people around, no other stresses, just them, it was when they worked best. Eleanor just smiled.

"I'm glad." And she was.

"Okay, your turn." Draco said, getting excited as he pulling a small package from under the tree. It fit in the palm of Eleanor's hand.

"Are you proposing?" Eleanor asked in a light voice as she pulled the wrapping paper back to reveal a small, black, velvet box. Her heart stopped when she saw the box, and her hands began shaking ever so slightly.

"Not exactly." Draco murmured softly, wanting her to open it faster. She gave him a curious look before flipping open the lid.

It was a ring, a thin silver band wrapped around three uncut stones: a moonstone, an emerald, and a sapphire.

"It's your birthstone, and your parents birthstones." Draco explained, watching Eleanor as her eyes filled with tears looking at the dainty piece of jewelry.

"I don't know what to say." Eleanor said shakily, not taking her wet eyes off of the box. "This is spectacular, truly." She swiped her hand over her cheeks. "How did you come up with this? This is perfect!"

"I wanted to bring your parents into this Christmas as much as I could." Draco explained.

"Oh, Draco." Eleanor threw her arms around his neck and held onto him firmly for a few moments. He understood her heart, she knew he did. She pulled away and looked at his face for a moment before putting her lips on his gently. "Okay, that was the last one." Eleanor promised, slipping the ring on her finger. "Thank you."

* * *

"Do you think she left yet?" Narcissa fretted, looking at the clock on the wall of their coast chateau. Her and Lucius had escaped the Manor for a few days, unable to face Draco, or have Eleanor for Christmas in their shame. They also puzzled over legal documents for ages, trying to find a way out of this, a way out of Eleanor and Draco's betrothal. The only option was for Lucius not to fail.

But now Narcissa didn't want to fail further as a parent by leaving him alone on Christmas. She knew that Eleanor would come for the evening, she loved Christmas and she was good to her word. Now they just had to wait until she was gone.

"I don't know dear." Lucius said absently. He would have chosen to hide away forever if it didn't mean damning his son and his best friend's daughter to a life of service to the Dark Lord.

"We can't just let him spend Christmas alone." Narcissa nearly wailed.

"She will be with him." Lucius reasoned. Part of him was grateful to have confided his sins to his wife, but her panic only increased his.

"I'm going back." Narcissa concluded. "I need to see him."

She quietly Floo'd to Lucius' private study fireplace and walked on silent feet to the parlor, she heard soft voices coming from under the tree and couldn't stop herself from peering into the room as Eleanor placed her lips on Draco's. "Okay, that was the last one." Eleanor stated when she pulled away. Narcissa had never seen so much love in her son's eyes as she did when he looked at Eleanor. Narcissa knew that Eleanor would always be Draco's greatest stronghold and also greatest weakness.

* * *

Eleanor tiptoed into Grimmauld Place when the rest of the house was asleep.

"Have a good night, my dear?" Remus' whisper was loud in the silent hallways, causing Eleanor to jump.

"I told you not to wait up." Eleanor jokingly scolded. "Yes, it was nice. Just Draco and I, which was in some ways better."

"Should I be worried about this Malfoy boy?" Remus raised a brow. Eleanor rubbed the band of her ring with her thumb and smiled widely at the feel of it.

"No, you shouldn't be." She wasn't.

* * *

Grimmauld place was flooded with laughter, wrapping paper, and people on Christmas morning. Of course, Eleanor felt the sting of missing her parents on her favorite holiday, but this crowd was bright with joy and love. Eleanor drifted from person to person, sharing hugs and Christmas joy. She felt very wanted, it was something she hadn't felt in a long time.

"I never asked, how was the Malfoy's last night?" Hermione asked, her and Hermione had shared a bed the night before to make room for the extra guests over the holiday. Hermione only muttered a soft hello when Eleanor made her way in, then rolled over and went back to sleep.

"It was nice." Eleanor responded with a soft smile. "Lucius and Narcissa weren't there, so Draco and I had a quiet night in."

"A quiet night in?" Hermione repeated with a raised brow.

Eleanor shook her head and rolled her eyes slightly at her disapproving friend. "Nothing like that." She assured. "He and I just had some things we needed to talk about and it was actually very helpful." Eleanor paused for a moment, playing with the ring that he had given her. She debated hiding it for a moment, only because of the connotations a ring had, but decided to show Hermione anyway. "He gave me this. It's my and my parent's birthstones."

Hermione's eyes bulged out for a moment. "A-a ring?" She stammered out.

"Oh come on, 'Mione, the ring doesn't mean anything. It's just a touching gift."

"I mean, it is lovely." Hermione recovered, examining the rocks that sat on her finger. "I'm just confused by you two."

"Hermione, enough." Eleanor stated. "He and I have a long history, I can't just not be his friend. I know you don't understand it, but I need you to trust me." Hermione huffed quietly, but nodded in succession. The two were very similar in many ways, and that forged their friendship, however they had enough differences to keep them having little spats like this one.

"Eleanor!" She heard Sirius' voice call from across the room, where he sat by Remus, "Moony tells me that you are in need of ideas for your future, come, sit, I have a few ideas."

Sirius and her father had had a few Christmas Morning drinks and were laughing in the corner while excitedly watching everyone open gifts. Remus, Eleanor was learning, was very serious and didn't let himself have too much fun. Sirius was good for him, he helped Remus laugh. Eleanor had been thinking of extending the invite to Remus to live in the Cordarri Castle while she was at school, and the only reason she hadn't was because she was afraid he would be too lonely without Sirius by his side.

"What are your ideas for me, Sirius?" Eleanor asked as she sat beside him and her father on the sofa.

"Well, you're a proper Gryffindor, you could be an Auror like Harry." He said, Eleanor laughed.

"I'm not brave like Harry." Eleanor shook her head. "I'm not really like most Gryffindors." She reflected on the Sorting Hat telling her that she was a fool after she refused the original pick of Hufflepuff.

"I don't think that is true." Sirius shook his head with a smile stretched on his rosy cheeks. "But not an Auror, alright then...let me think...What about a teacher? You could teach at Hogwarts, what's your best subject?"

"Hmm," Eleanor thought for a moment, "Herbology, but I don't know if I would want to teach."

"You're good with Defense." Remus pointed out.

"Harry's better, he'd make a good teacher." Eleanor deflected.

"That boy's an Auror, through and through." Sirius insisted.

"I don't think so." Eleanor shook her head. "He's a teacher."

"A teacher?" Ron butt into the conversation. "Harry a teacher?"

"What the hell do you think he is doing right now?" Eleanor questioned, then bit her tongue realizing none of the adults knew about Dumbledore's Army.

"What do you mean by that?" Remus asked with furrowed brows.

"Harry's tutoring us in Defense." Eleanor quickly spilled, it wasn't quite a lie, but it wasn't really the truth.

"What's the Malfoy boy thinking of doing with his life?" Sirius asked, changing the subject. Eleanor looked down at her ring for only a moment, and shrugged.

"I don't know." She said honestly, but she hoped it included her.

* * *

_Draco, _

_Merry Christmas! It's funny to me sometimes thinking about where we were at this time last year. We were dancing at the Yule Ball, and you were being a prick, and I went along with it as I always do. This year really put us through the ringer, huh? _

_If I could go back and change things, I would. I would change a lot of things, but one constant that I would always choose to have is you - prick or not. Don't ask me why. I want to spend next Christmas with you. If I'm being honest, I want to spend every Christmas with you, and every birthday, and every Easter, and every Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter. I feel ridiculous writing it, after everything that's happened this year, but I have to be honest. _

_I hope you know that even when you drive me mad, I am always hoping that you'll be my partner in everything. _

_Love Always, _

_Your El _


	23. Chapter 23

**Lil note: **Hey friends! So we are back at Hogwarts, and for the sake of not dragging pointlessly for these months at Hogwarts, I do bounce around a fair bit to provide snapshots of important moments. So the next few months are wrapped up nicely in this chapter to get us to some more substantial story. I just did this to save us all from the slowness of months without much action. Hope you all enjoy! Let me know what you think!

* * *

Eleanor returned to Hogwarts feeling refreshed. She had left feeling empty, and returned feeling full. With this new skip in her step, she was able to dive head first into her studies with tenacity; something her and Hermione were able to connect over again. She would meet Draco once or twice a week in the library to study, or just to talk. She was good to her word and didn't kiss him anymore, and he was good to his, and didn't kiss anyone else. They weren't parading their friendship in front of the entire school, but it was back to normal, like it had been in the years past, and that made things easier for Eleanor.

"El, I need to ask you something, don't get mad." Draco said one evening in an abandoned library corner. The two had always enjoyed having relative privacy. They weren't sneaking around to be physical anymore, but they were both still private people, so they scheduled their meetings when the library wouldn't be crowded.

"I don't like it when you start your questions with that." Eleanor trailed suspiciously as she put her quill on the table and gave her full attention to Draco.

"Look, I know you don't like it when I talk about the Inquisitorial Squad," Eleanor rolled her eyes and shook her head in annoyance, looking back down at her assignment, "El, this is serious." Draco pleaded. Reluctantly, Eleanor looked back at him. They hadn't argued like they did at the beginning of the year since that day in her parent's room, but they still bickered lightly occasionally. "Umbridge thinks Potter has a little gang forming. Don't think I don't notice you all disappearing at random times, nowhere to be found. What are you up to?"

"I don't know what you mean." Eleanor responded cooly, keeping any semblance of dishonesty from her voice.

"El," Draco gave her a hard look. He hadn't said her full name yet, but he was getting there. "I really just want you to be safe and not get expelled, I will keep you out of it."

"Out of what?" Eleanor played dumb for a while longer. She wouldn't tell Draco about Dumbledore's Army, she refused to give her friends a reason to not trust her.

"Look, having an unsupervised club is against school policy." Draco explained.

"If Umbridge passed a new decree saying Gryffindors couldn't breathe on school grounds would you ask me to hold my breath or just suffocate me yourself?" Eleanor wondered with narrowed eyes. She was daring him to challenge her, he saw the ruthlessness in her eyes. He was trying to win her affections back, but he also wasn't one to let his pride go. And he was genuinely concerned for her.

"El, don't be like this. I'm trying to help."

"Should I consider this a warning?" Eleanor asked flat out. Draco's shoulders slumped a little at her lack of compliance.

"Yeah, I guess it is." He let out lamely.

* * *

"What about an Aquatic Herbologist?" Draco asked Eleanor as the pair sat by the lake. As the days grew warmer, they tried to get outside as much as possible. Draco had brought a handful of pamphlets and books about career paths for him and Eleanor to peruse while trying to find what Eleanor should do with her life. It was incredibly helpful of him, but these sessions caused a lot of stress in Eleanor - who never felt closer to finding her calling. "You could be a Shallow Water Aquatic Herbologist or a Deep Water Aquatic Herbologist." Draco informed as he continued reading the page. Eleanor's interest was not even remotely piqued, but she let him continue to ramble for a bit so he felt like he was being helpful. "Oh, you could specialize in medicinal harvesting or investigative work. That sounds interesting."

"Yeah," Eleanor replied unenthused as she thumbed through a pamphlet she had picked up in Hogsmeade.

"Okay, so not that." Draco nodded in understanding, putting the Encyclopedia of Herbologist Professions aside and picking up a pamphlet on Ministry Internships.

"Don't even bother with that, I'm not going to be caught dead in the Ministry." Eleanor scoffed as she caught sight of what Draco was currently reading.

"I might, though." Draco mumbled softly. Eleanor shook the pettiness from her shoulders to try to be supportive. "I just think my father would like it."

"Would you like it?" Eleanor inquired, wanting to excited for him.

"I might need to try it out and see, but I don't know, I like the idea of following in his footsteps, I guess." Draco didn't look up both in concentration, and on account of being a bit sheepish. "I think our family gets some negative attention because of his past, and I just want to redeem it by doing good in the Ministry."

Eleanor smiled widely at him. "I think that's very admirable." And she did.

* * *

"Focus on your happiest memory. Let it fill you up inside. Let that feeling take over before your cast your patronus." Harry instructed. It had taken Eleanor a few weeks to catch up with everyone else, but she was struggling far less under Harry's tutelage than under nearly all of her Defense teachers in the past, save her father.

Although, she was having a bit of trouble with the patronus. She was growing frustrated with herself that only small wisps of light were coming from her wand. She had plenty of happy memories to choose from, and while her year had been hard, she still had happiness in her past.

Harry came over to check on her after he had made his rounds. "You doing okay?" He asked softly.

"I just can't get the damn thing to work." Eleanor puffed out, clutching her wand with white knuckles.

"Okay, loosen up a bit." Harry instructed. Eleanor heaved a sigh and shook her shoulders and let go of her wand slightly. She knew she was getting too in her head about the whole thing, but the longer it took for her to succeed, the more frustrated she got.

"I'm upset, I have such happy memories, and none of them are working." She growled, Harry chuckled at the juxtaposition of her words and her tone.

"Well you can't make a patronus in anger, no matter how many happy memories you have." Harry responded, then looked around to see if there was anyone listening in. "Look, you have a lot of sadness in your life. It's just the truth. You and I both have a lot that dementors would really like to get a hold of. The memory I first used wasn't even real. It was just me, as I was at 13, talking with my parents. It doesn't have to be a real concrete thing, it can be anything that brings joy." Harry advised. "Let the joy shine through the dark, whatever it is."

Eleanor smiled at her friend, wise beyond his years, knowing that he understood her loss in a way that not many could. She took a deep breath and thought deeply, she took Harry's idea and thought about being with her parents as she was then. She thought of them in present tense for the first time in nearly a year, she thought about what that would feel like.

"Expecto Patronum." She let out, and from the end of her wand sprang a lithe bobcat that prowled along for a moment or two before disappearing. "Oh Merlin!" She let out excitedly. "Harry that worked!"

"I knew you'd get it." Harry smiled encouragingly. "Okay, everyone!" He called the attention of the room. "You've all been working so hard, and I'm so proud of all of you. I think this is a good place to end for today, and I'll see you next time." He dismissed. Eleanor usually liked to hang around with Ron, Harry, and Hermione afterwards, but had a standing meeting with Draco to work on her Potions essay. She scurried out of the Room of Requirement quickly.

She flung herself into the seat across from Draco at an isolated table in the library. Draco looked up at her swiftly before returning to his parchment.

"In a rush?" He regarded.

"Sorry, I was just doing some things." Eleanor, still riding the high of her patronus, was unable to think of an elaborate lie. She pulled out the beginning of her Potions essay from her bag and slid it across the table for Draco to read over and make critiques on. Her leg was bouncing in jubilation at her previous accomplishment. It had been a year of struggles with school, and it felt rejuvenating for her to have done something well.

"You're rather giddy today," Draco noted with a bit of humor in his voice, "especially for someone redoing another Potions essay." He chided softly. "I've read this one already."

"And it wasn't good, so I need to redo it, tell me what to fix." Eleanor brushed him off.

"El, I think you should just drop Potions." Draco joked lightly.

"Yeah, yeah. That's a problem for next year, it's too late now." Eleanor sighed, reaching into her bag once more and pulling out a Defense worksheet that she had wanted Draco to look over too. "You know Umbridge best, are my answers bullshit enough for her to buy it?"

"Defense too?" Draco tsked. "What are we going to do with you?"

"I'd be good in Defense if I had a good teacher." Eleanor sighed, knowing she did have one in Harry, but she wasn't getting graded for that.

"Somehow I doubt that." Draco replied, cringing at her worksheet.

"Well I can produce a patronus, how about that?" Eleanor shot back. "A perfect little bobcat." Draco made no reaction to her words though his wheels began turning rapidly. In that moment, she didn't realize the weight that her admission carried.

* * *

Months passed like this: Draco and Eleanor would steal a few hours a week to strengthen their friendship. Many times Draco would confess feelings and Eleanor would say it wasn't a good time, and vice versa. They were always coming up with excuses as to not be together, and both thought it was for the best at one time or another. Hermione, Harry, and Ron were suspicious of Eleanor and her regained strict friendship with Draco, but did their best to trust her words. The four of them worked hard in Dumbledore's Army, studied for their O. and generally went around trying to limit the havoc they would normally wreak on Hogwarts.

Draco's previous warning took a few months to come to fruition, however it did eventually. Eleanor was running a few minutes behind for Dumbledore's Army due to another Potions essay Snape had made her redo. She walked quickly so as to make it without being late, but was trying not to draw attention to herself when two arms snaked around her waist and pulled her into a quiet alcove.

"Shit-" Eleanor gasped out, before seeing it was Draco who pinned her to the wall. "I really don't have time for this." Eleanor breathed out, pushing lightly against his chest. "Besides, we aren't doing this anyway, and you know it." They had stayed un-romantic this long, she knew they could wait at least another hour while she perfected her Defense skills.

"Umbridge knows." Draco informed lowly. Eleanor's heart stopped at his words, both in fear for her friends and in anger at Draco. "I didn't tell her," Draco clarified, "It was Marietta who let her in on the secret." Eleanor heaved a sigh, fearing the worst punishment for her and her friends. "I told her that I wouldn't go with to bust you all, that it didn't seem like a student's place. And I couldn't let you go and be caught."

"You couldn't have told Harry, Ron, and Hermione?" Eleanor raised a brow.

"No, Eleanor, not this again." Eleanor bit the inside of her cheek, knowing by the sound of her full name that he was displeased with her. "It was too late to stop them, but not too late to stop you."

"My name is on the damn sheet, Marietta has seen me there, I'm fucked either way." Eleanor snarled softly. "I can't let my friends know that I'm a coward who abandoned them."

"El," Draco hung his head, "Umbridge already got them. They are on their way to Dumbledore's office now."

"How could you let this happen? They could be expelled!"

"Look, I figured out what was going on a long time ago." Draco revealed. "I didn't know you called yourselves Dumbledore's Army or whatever, but I knew that you were being taught spells that Umbridge wouldn't teach you."

"How?"

"You were so excited to tell me about your Patronus, it didn't take long for me to figure out the only person who could have taught you that." Draco rolled his eyes, Eleanor cringed at her naivety and her destructive need to tell Draco everything. "The only reason Umbridge didn't figure it out sooner is because I told her that you were telling me bits of information, unknowingly, that led her on a wild goose chase all around Hogwarts for any information on what you might be doing. When Marietta snitched, the first thing I did was try to warn your Saint Potter, but I didn't get to him in time, I had to at least get to you."

Eleanor was breathless at what Draco had to say. She had not been aware of his silent work against Umbridge, and more importantly, on behalf of her and her friends. He had done it without hoping for returns or gratification. Eleanor didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to think, all she knew was that Draco at this time last year wouldn't have done this.

"Thank you." She let out quietly.

* * *

A huge event that caused a lot of dread in Eleanor was her meeting with McGonagall to plan her future career path. Many study sessions with Draco had ended in Draco scoping the library for job ideas and Eleanor picturing her life doing it, then shutting it down. Hermione also tried to be helpful, but it always ended with Eleanor going into Ministry work with her, and that might have been the last place Eleanor wanted to work.

"McGonagall will help you figure it out, love." Draco assured half an hour before the meeting. Eleanor felt her heart racing.

"Don't call me that." Eleanor reminded him, panic putting her in a daze. Despite Draco being helpful to her and her friends, and despite Eleanor appreciating it greatly, the two had decided to not pursue a relationship again, but sometimes Draco seemed to forget this and still treat her like she was his girlfriend, and often when he did this, Eleanor momentarily forgot why she wasn't and would entertain the idea again.

"Worst thing that could happen is that you could live on your parents money forever and never have to work. You'd still be well off and never have to work a day in your life, you could just get married and have kids." Draco attempted a different route of comfort.

"That's very progressive of you Draco." Eleanor sneered at his comment.

"I'm only trying to help." Draco raised his hands in mock surrender.

"Am I even good at anything?" Eleanor fretted, grabbing Draco's hand in near desperation. She had asked this question close to a million times in the past few months, and Draco had always answered the same way.

"You're an amazing friend, you care about people, you're loyal, dedicated, and tenacious, and kind, and clever." Draco's response was almost robotic at this point, a knee jerk reaction to her fears, but it never lost tenderness and honesty.

"None of those are marketable skills, Draco." Eleanor pointed out in frustration.

"Maybe you don't market them." Draco suggested. "Maybe you use those skills to do meaningful things for people you love, and that could be your legacy."

"That does sound like a nice life." Eleanor took a breath and smiled at Draco. "I don't know how well that will go over with McGonagall, but I can give it a shot."

"Maybe after you and her discuss your future, you and I can talk about ours?"

"Draco," Eleanor jokingly whined, "not this again. We've talked about it, we're waiting."

"Until what, again?" Draco was near begging now, clutching Eleanor's hand in his own. It was nearly a joke between the two of them now, knowing they loved each other without ever saying it, convincing themselves that it would happen eventually, always in some distant future.

"The right time." Eleanor said softly. "I don't think now is that time." She thought of her friends, who were still convinced that Draco's father was a Death Eater, and that Draco wasn't unlike him. They didn't believe her when she told them what he had done for Dumbledore's Army, and now with Dumbledore gone and Umbridge all but ransacking the school, an easy target for their frustrations was Draco, who despite abandoning the badge and skipping meetings, was technically still a member of the Inquisitorial Squad. "I have to go." She said lightly, and pulled her hand from Draco's as she walked to McGonagall's office.

"Hello Professor." She greeted, trying to keep her voice calm.

"Miss Cordarri, welcome." Professor McGonagall had always been exceedingly kind to Eleanor, especially after her parents had passed. She made sure everything got done, and didn't let Eleanor slack, but she knew when to make exceptions. "It's been a long year for you." She noted. Eleanor nodded somewhat sadly, trying to ignore the pink blob of Umbridge sitting in the corner. "Have you given much thought to what you would like to explore post-Hogwarts?"

"I've given it incredible thought, Professor." Eleanor let out with a humorless laugh. "And I can't seem to come up with anything."

"That's perfectly normal, dear, you are quite young." McGonagall slid a plate of biscuits over to Eleanor, who took one to be polite, but didn't eat it due to her anxious stomach.

"I would have thought your parents would have raised you better than to not have a plan." Umbridge muttered indignantly.

"Just ignore her, Eleanor, I do." Professor McGonagall let out quickly, not sparing a glance at Umbridge. Harry had had his meeting earlier in the week, and had told the story in great detail about how McGonagall had said her piece to Umbridge and how civility was no longer an even remote option between the two. But it was hard for Eleanor to ignore comments like that, and with the anniversary of the death of her parents fast approaching, that comment dug deep.

"I mean, I want to be productive and help people and have a real purpose," Eleanor tried to formulate her next sentence carefully, but lost control and just went for the jugular, "so definitely not a Ministry job." She looked directly at Umbridge with narrowed eyes, and McGonagall let the tiniest smile creep onto her lips.

"What is your dear friend Draco Malfoy thinking of doing?" Umbridge spoke softly, knowing that he did want to pursue a Ministry career, or was at least planning on it. She was trying to be smug and use Eleanor's friendship with Draco to set an example, Eleanor felt bile rising in her throat and she tried to bite down her anger. "He's such a nice boy, perhaps you should try to be more like him."

"I believe that currently the only thing on Draco Malfoy's mind is coming up with clever ways to get me to fall in love with him, the latest being leaving your Inquisitorial Squad to show me how serious he is about being upstanding and not a bully." Eleanor snapped in spite of herself. "The only way you will see me working in the Ministry is if I were your boss, because the most productive thing I can think to do would be to get rid of you and fill the position with literally anyone else." Umbridge opened her mouth wide to begin an angry diatribe, but Eleanor pushed her chair back. "I'll take my detention with Professor McGonagall. I'm not in the mood for a new scar on my hand."


	24. Chapter 24

**Hey Friends! **Usually I update more frequently than this but this chapter took a bit of time to rework! Lots of action in here and lots of surprises! Excited to be back!

* * *

It had taken a lot of convincing from both Hermione and Draco (on separate occasions) for Eleanor to actually take her Potions OWL. She was convinced that it was useless for her to go. She knew she wouldn't pass, but Draco had finally reminded her that she wasn't one to give up, so reluctantly she went. After taking that OWL and knowing she did terrible on it, she wasn't so keen on going to her others. It had been a hard year and no amount of studying towards the end could save her now.

Each day, each test was like a fresh stab to Eleanor's pride. She hated doing poorly. Sitting in the rooms and hearing the clock tick by was a new brand of torture that Eleanor had never experienced and wasn't keen to continue. The most relieving feeling was when the fireworks began in the hall.

Hogwarts was a mad flurry when the Weasleys began setting off their various pranks throughout the halls. Eleanor pushed her dreaded test away and shot up with the rest of her classmates who went to the courtyard to watch the fireworks.

"They did that for you." Draco's voice came into her ear as they walked with the crowd.

"They did that for everyone." Eleanor replied laughingly.

"I was watching you sigh and groan the entire time. You benefited from it more than anyone else." Draco chuckled. "Let's use this time to study for your next one." He suggested.

"I might use this time to run far away and never come back." Eleanor scoffed. "No more bloody OWLs."

"El," Draco pulled her back to him as the fireworks faded, "the library. You'll feel better if you do."

Eleanor groaned because she knew he was right and followed him to the library as the fun began to die down. Draco pulled out all of his old tests and essays for Charms and stacked them in front of her. "You'll be grateful you did this when everyone else is getting yelled at."

"You have no fun." Eleanor hummed but began to read Draco's most recent essay. Eventually the light from the windows began to grow darker as dusk fell around the castle and Eleanor was tearing through Draco's old tests and taking her own notes from them.

"I'm going to grab dinner and see the damage." Draco announced as he pushed away from the table in the library.

"I'm going to get a few more essays read." Eleanor replied, giving him a thankful smile. It seemed only seconds after Draco left that Hermione rushed in, dirt on her face and twigs in her hair.

"We need to go." She said frantically.

* * *

"He's supposed to be here." Harry said, staring at the aisle where he had seen Sirius being tortured. "H-he's supposed to be right here." Eleanor watched him and thought about how she still didn't know how her parents died, and looking at the Department of Mysteries, it became easy to understand why. This place was a maze, an awful maze filled with magic that didn't make sense.

"Harry, this one's got your name on it." Neville's soft voice announced. The whole group turned to look. It was with sickly fascination that Harry grabbed his orb, holding it in his hands and staring at it.

"Sirius isn't here." Eleanor said. "We should go back to the Order and figure everything out." She needed to get out of this place, she needed to be away from where her parents had lost their lives. How had that happened? Why were they here? Eleanor suddenly had no desire to know.

Then the footsteps approached. A slow walk, a gleaming face walked towards them. A Death Eater. All of their wands pointed squarely at the figure.

"Where is Sirius?" Harry demanded. The Death Eater tsked disapprovingly.

"You know, you really should learn to tell the difference between dreams and reality." He said before whisking away his mask.

Eleanor couldn't breathe.

"Lucius." She choked out. How was this possible? This man had helped raise her, he had taken her into his home, protected her, looked after her, mourned her parents, raised a man she knew in her heart she loved. This was not possible. Eleanor pushed by Harry, lowering her wand.

"Eleanor, don't." Harry called as she walked closer to Lucius.

"What the hell is this?" Eleanor demanded, seething, crying. Lucius looked stunned to see her, as though he had not expected her to tag along with Harry, as though he had forgotten they were friends.

"Eleanor," Lucius faltered, his confidence now withering away. He knew that she would have to die or he would lose his son's loyalty. That would have to be the outcome of this night. But if she died, than the Dark Lord would surely kill him for taking away his access to her money and friendship to Harry Potter. Her presence here changed everything.

"You come here, to the place where my parents died, and conspire to kill me and my friends in the same hallways." Eleanor spat out, her heart breaking and boiling all at once.

"Oh, Lucius." Came a high and pouty voice from behind him. "She still thinks you had nothing to do with that." She laughed loudly.

Tears were falling down her cheeks now. "What?" She gasped.

"You haven't told her?" Bellatrix Lestrange made her appearance, looking sinister and absolutely delighted at Eleanor's heartbreak. "Oh dear, well, I guess cat's out of the bag." She giggled. "Lucius and I teamed up, you see, he got them to sign you away, then I came and finished them off." She sounded boastful. Eleanor lunged for her, but a hand on her arm pulled her back towards her group. Tears were flowing furiously down her face.

"You fucking coward!" She screamed at him.

"Hand over the prophecy." Lucius bit out, his words directed at Harry but his eyes locked on Eleanor. He wanted to explain to her everything, how he had been warning them, trying to help them, how everything had gone wrong, but he couldn't, not here.

"If you do anything to us, I'll break it." Harry warned. Hermione held onto Eleanor's shoulder tightly as she ground her teeth and cried silently. Bellatrix Lestrange let out a high pitched laugh at his words, then returned her eyes to Eleanor and smirked.

"I'll kill you." Eleanor bit out, she didn't mean it, she couldn't kill anyone, but there was an inhuman part of her that craved revenge.

"Let's all just calm down." Lucius raised his hands slowly. "All we want from you is the prophecy."

"Why did Voldemort need me to come and get it?" Harry retorted.

"You dare speak his name?" Bellatrix looked as though she had been hit. "You filthy Half-Blood."

"Now, now Bellatrix, the boy is just curious." Lucius tried to appear calm, but Eleanor saw his hands shaking ever so slightly. She knew that he was not expecting his secret to come out tonight, and it was killing him. Eleanor found a bit of solace in the fact that he at least had enough humanity to feel regret. "Prophecies can only be retrieved by those about whom they are made, which is lucky for you, really." Lucius began walking towards them, Eleanor didn't want to take her eyes off of him, but felt a slight squeeze on her arm from Hermione that alerted her to the hoard of Death Eaters now slowly surrounding them. "Haven't you always wanted to know about the connection between you and the Dark Lord? Why he was unable to kill you when you were just an infant? Don't you want to know the secret of your scar? All of the answers are there, in your hand." Lucius looked down at the glowing blue orb that rested in Harry's fingers. "All you have to do is give it to me. I can show you everything." Harry looked at the orb himself, then to Eleanor whose face still shown with tears.

"I've waited 14 years." Harry stated.

"I know." Lucius sounded as though he was trying to be sympathetic, Eleanor wanted nothing more than to punch him square in the jaw.

"I guess I could wait a little longer." Harry stated definitively before giving the signal to his friends. All of them shot a stunning spell out of their wands and ran towards the door they had entered. They stayed together for a time, but Death Eaters would materialize in front of one or the other, causing them to split up.

"Enough of this shit." Eleanor muttered to herself, escaping from Hermione's side, just hoping to run into Bellatrix or Lucius on her own.

"Eleanor?" Hermione called out nervously at her friend's disappearance.

Much to the dismay of the tear stained girl, neither Bellatrix nor Lucius showed themselves to her, a few other Death Eaters did, but Eleanor would throw a stun their way and weave through the aisles of prophecies until she bumped into the group again and immediately saw Ginny's wand raised and heard her shout "Reducto!"

It took a moment before all of the prophecies began to fall, thousands, if not millions shattering on the floor. "Get back to the door!" Harry instructed, the seven of them ran at lightning speed, Eleanor's mind could barely keep up with everything she had just seen, her feet carrying her when her brain just wanted to stop. They fell through the open door and stepped into nothing.

Eleanor relished in the feeling of falling. Her tears dried against the rushing air, she thought she would die at the end, and would that really be so bad? Or she would stay suspended in the air forever, and that wouldn't be the worst thing either. Everything she had thought had been a lie. Any trust she had for people now seemed extremely misplaced. Everything was wrong. There was a slight tug on her navel as her body jerked to a soft stop a foot above the ground before landing on the hard surface. Eleanor laid on the ground while Harry muttered on about voices and Hermione begged him to leave. Eleanor sat up slowly but didn't listen to anything they were saying until Harry said in a serious voice: "Get behind me."

Eleanor scrambled to her feet and huddled in between her friends while they got ransacked by clouds of black. Eleanor felt herself being tugged to her feet and held by her hair against a tall man. She watched on helplessly, struggling only slightly and getting a wand tapped on her throat to remind her that she could still die, just like her parents.

Harry was the only one left, and Lucius stalked towards him, malice clear in his face. "Did you actually believe, or were you truly naive enough to think that children stood a chance against us?" All Eleanor could think about in this moment was Draco. How had Draco come from this man? This dishonest, cruel, evil murderer? There were times when Eleanor had called Draco cruel, but he didn't even hold a light to his father. Eleanor had trusted him, defended him, shared joys with him, and he was still capable of this evil? It did not make sense. "I'll make this simple," Lucius extended his hand to Harry, "give me the prophecy now, or watch your friends die." Lucius could have vomited at the words coming out of his mouth, he knew that it would only be a matter of time before the Dark Lord held his son to a similar ultimatum.

"Don't give it to him, Harry!" Neville cried, earning a harsh tap from Bellatrix's wand. This utterance, apparently, did not persuade Harry, because he placed the prophecy delicately in Lucius' hands, looking around at his friends in the clutches of Death Eaters.

The moment Harry had given over the prophecy, a beam of white light entered the room. Sirius appeared behind Lucius.

"Get away from my Godson." With a swift and hard punch to the jaw, Lucius fell to the ground, crushing the prophecy. The Order started arriving quickly then, Remus ignored all other Death Eaters present and ran to Eleanor's side.

"My love, what are you doing here?" He asked, pulling her in a bone crushing hug.

"Harry saw Sirius being tortured, I had to come and help save him, I couldn't let anyone else die here." Tears began bubbling in Eleanor's throat again, Remus held her close for another moment.

"Stay here, please." He begged, as he fled to help the other members of the Order. Eleanor, for lack of better judgement, did. She watched while the Order fought for them, fended off Death Eaters, and Eleanor took this moment to breathe. Harry had, of course, joined the fray. But Eleanor didn't trust herself, her judgement, or her aim in this battle. Her hands shook wildly and she felt as though she would throw up on the pavement when she saw Bellatrix cornering Sirius. She looked around, no one was paying attention, only Harry, who looked desperate and confused.

Eleanor's childhood flashed before her eyes as she watched the woman who stole her parents from her prepare to steal Harry's godfather as well. A surge of passionate energy went through Eleanor's body as she screamed the only thing she could think, feeling as though her parents were right beside her.

"Expecto Patronum." And a giant, white lion, one that resembled very much the lion on the Gryffindor house crest, flew from the end of her wand, shocking her, because the last time she produced a Patronus, it had been a small bobcat, nothing to write home about. Her Patronus rushed through Bellatrix, knocking the woman to the ground and leaving Sirius stunned, but very much alive.

Without thinking much more, Eleanor shot up from her spot to where Bellatrix's wand had fallen and held it in her hands. "What are you going to do with that, Eleanor?" Lucius' voice rang out in the now relative silence. Death Eaters had been apprehended by Order Members, her friends were safe. Eleanor trained her eyes on Malfoy, she knew Bellatrix, who was half unconscious from the blow and also wandless, was not much of a threat, only Lucius. "Turn it into the Ministry and get her arrested for all her crimes?" He was taunting her, the man had the audacity to taunt her after what he had done to her parents.

"I could break it." Eleanor let out quietly.

"Ah yes, because broken wands defeat great Witches and Wizards." He remarked snidely, Eleanor noted how his hands shook, how his eyes looked half crazed.

"My parents loved you." Eleanor clenched her teeth. "And you killed them."

"I tried to stop them from dying." Lucius lashed out, brandishing his wand, causing Remus and Sirius both to take a cautionary step forward. "I gave them a way out, and their pride caused them to refuse me."

"So you killed them." Eleanor stated.

"I didn't kill them!" Lucius yelled madly. "She killed them," He jabbed his wand in Bellatrix's direction, "I put them in the wrong place, at the wrong time, I didn't know she would be there." Lucius took a deep breath and closed his eyes, as if remembering the moment. "I did something worse to them. I stole…" He trailed. Eleanor furrowed her brows.

"Stole what?" She demanded.

"You."

"Lucius!" Bellatrix snapped. "Don't betray our Lord's secrets!" She was up in a moment, hands wrapped around Eleanor, grasping for her wand. Eleanor elbowed her sharply in the gut and ran towards Lucius, who looked equal parts crazed and defeated. Months of keeping dark secrets that hurt those he loved was driving him to insanity.

"Eleanor, that's enough." Remus grabbed his daughter and pulled her close to him. "Sweetheart, he isn't worth it, we will figure this out when we are all safe." He whispered lowly to her.

Bellatrix took this as her chance to run, which caused the domino effect of Harry chasing her, leaving Sirius to chase him, Death Eaters struggling to chase the two of them and the Order following suit until only Lucius, Remus and Eleanor stood in the room.

"What did you do?" Eleanor asked slowly, keeping her eyes trained lethally on Lucius.

"They were trying to protect you from Him." Lucius breathed out raggedly. "I warned them that He wanted you to join Him and they didn't accept my help, they went behind my back, behind His back to set everything up for you to be in control of yourself. If they had just-" Lucius shook his head. "I was ordered to Imperius them to legitimize you as my ward, then I could promise you to the Dark Lord. Bellatrix decided to tie up loose ends and kill them before they realized what I was doing. I was trying to keep them alive." He was begging Eleanor to understand. "I was trying to keep you alive. You only fall to him if I fail." He gestured around. "I just failed."

"I don't understand." Remus said. "I'm her father, legally, guardianship falls to me. Her parents made it so that she was able to be in control of her own assets and not split them."

"Yes." Lucius agreed. "And the Minister will not recognize the documents I made them sign as legitimate. Once the Ministry falls and the Dark Lord chooses to recognize those documents, your loyalties and your money will legally belong to your husband."

"I won't get married." Eleanor reasoned.

"My dear, you won't have much of a choice. Your feelings for my son are obvious, and the Dark Lord will use them against you." Lucius revealed quietly.

"That's if he ever comes to power." Remus amended. "Enough of this nonsense, you need to get home."

Eleanor still didn't understand what Lucius had revealed to her, the legality of things was confusing and overwhelming. In anger, she snapped Bellatrix's wand in half and threw it at Lucius' feet. "I loved you, and I love your son is twice the man you are, and I'm not ashamed to love him." She said with a level voice before turning to the exit. Remus kept his wand trained on Lucius until he was out of sight. When the two were finally alone, Remus pulled his daughter aside.

"Are you hurt?" He asked, searching her face and body for any sign of trauma.

"Not really." She shrugged out of his grasp. "I don't understand what he meant. I don't know what's going on."

"You're safe for now." Remus assured, wiping a bit of blood from a small cut on her face.

"Is Draco?"

"I would imagine the boy has some hard times ahead, but yes, for now he is also safe."

"I want to see him." Eleanor was nearly in tears now. She didn't want to ask him questions, or wonder about his loyalties, or even talk about his father. She just wanted to see him. Things were going to get worse, they were going to get darker, and she just wanted to be with him.

"I should imagine you do." Remus gave her a soft smile. "Let's go join the others."

As they approached the fountain in the main lobby of the Ministry of Magic, the duo stopped dead in their tracks, seeing Voldemort in the flesh standing over Harry's eerily still body. Mad Eye was restraining Sirius and everyone else watched helplessly. Dumbledore looked calmly over Voldemort and Harry.

"That's-" Eleanor breathed. Remus gave a nod and positioned himself in front of Eleanor as they walked towards the group. All traces of Death Eaters were gone, and fireplaces started to light up as the Minister and other officials walked onto the scene.

"I need to get Sirius out of here." Remus whispered to Eleanor, putting a hand on Sirius' shoulder, DisApparating the two of them.

"He's back." The Minister breathed out the moment before Voldemort disappeared.

Eleanor rushed to Harry's side as did Ron and Hermione. "Eleanor, you saved him." Harry gasped out, crushing Eleanor into his chest. "He should have died, he almost did, you saved him." His breathing was ragged and despite being weak, held Eleanor tightly to him.

"We didn't need any more deaths in the Department of Mysteries." Eleanor smiled sadly at Harry. She knew they would all have to talk to the authorities and reporters soon about what had happened that night, but she wanted to spend a single moment basking in the fact that no one had to lose their life that night.

"Lucius, he killed your parents." Harry breathed out. Eleanor gave a singular shake of her head.

"No. We'll talk about what Lucius Malfoy did or didn't do later." She assured, rubbing his arm and raising her eyes to the surrounding circle of Ministry officials offering hands to help the children up and flipping open notepads to get their stories.

Another fireplace flashed green. "El! Ellie!" A voice called out. There was only one person on the planet who called her that.

"Draco?" Eleanor spun to find him running towards her. He looked as though he had been awoken from bed, his hair a mess, the wrinkled clothes from the day before thrown on haphazardly and buttoned improperly.

Without a care, she threw her arms around his neck as their bodies collided with a breathless thud.

"Are you okay?" Eleanor detected desperation, even tears in his voice. "When I heard that you had left to the Ministry and that my aunt, and my fa-" he choked on the last word. "I thought you were dead." Eleanor buried her face into his neck while he hid his tears in her long hair. They stood like that for a long moment.

"I'm fine." Eleanor finally said, kissing the divet where his neck met his shoulder. "Draco, I love you." She admitted, pulling away from him to look into his light eyes. "Our lives are about to get so much harder, but I need you to know that I love you, and I'm not going to stop." Draco smiled widely, not caring that Harry Potter and his friends saw his inexplicable joy. He wrapped his fingers in Eleanor's hair and brought his forehead to hers gently.

"I've been waiting my whole life for you, El." He whispered softly. "I love you. More than you know."


	25. Chapter 25

**Quick Note: **Hello all! Hope you enjoy this chapter. This is really where I start to diverge from canon a fair amount and the story starts to shift quite a bit! Excited for what's to come!

* * *

"Have I thanked you yet today?" Sirius asked, walking into the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. Eleanor had a warm cup of tea in her hands and was sitting by Harry, who had the Daily Prophet flipped open.

"Only twice." Eleanor rolled her eyes in good humor, smiling at the dark haired man.

"Let me make it a third time. Thank you, Eleanor Cordarri, for saving my life." He grinned. Eleanor let out a laugh.

"Anyone else would have done the same." Eleanor shrugged off. She didn't think anyone would have actually stood by and let Sirius die, she was just the first one to act, if she hadn't have acted, somebody else surely would have.

"But no one else did, so I thank you."

"Okay, you've hit your quota for the day." Remus patted his friend on the shoulder as he entered the kitchen. "We don't need her head getting any bigger." The Weasleys had returned to the Burrow for the beginning of summer vacation, and Harry and Eleanor had gone over a few times, but both preferred to stay with Remus and Sirius in Grimmauld Place. They were quite the happy quartet. The home was full of jokes and laughter, and Eleanor didn't even feel left out being the only girl considering Tonks stopped by frequently and Hermione was an excellent writer. Hermione would be joining the crew later in the summer, after her family's holiday.

Eleanor didn't have much intention to live at Cordarri Castle long term for the time being. Last summer she enjoyed the private, she needed time to herself to grieve, but now it was nearly exclusively used as a rendezvous point for her and Draco. School had been out for a few weeks at this point, and Eleanor had successfully avoided Malfoy Manor while Lucius awaited, and was found guilty at his trial. Her and Draco didn't discuss his father much. She told him what Lucius had revealed to her and Draco was quietly working through his own mistrust in his father. The two spent their time together sharing in joy, and in a near indecent amount of kisses.

"Eleanor, not to put a damper on your summer vacation, but I thought we might talk about what to do about this guardianship situation." Remus said, as though it were a casual event that everyone had to talk about. Remus was happier for living with Sirius, Harry, and Eleanor. He was constantly surrounded by his favorite people. It made his pre and post transitions easier, and lifted the burden of everyday life. "I've been talking to Kingsley about the legality of the documents, and if the Ministry should fall-"

"Which it won't." Sirius put in.

"Yes, but if it should," Remus gave his friend a pointed look, "the best way to ensure you're funds are not tied to the Malfoy family in any way is to have them taken out of Gringotts."

"I don't know if I can do that." Eleanor creased her forehead. She had seen their Gringotts vault one time, and it was massive and filled to the brim. Thousands of years of Cordarri money and artifacts sat deep within the bank.

"Now I did a little research on ancient protection spells, and Moody tested my theories. They are Cordarri family spells, so technically, only a Cordarri can break them. Your parents manipulated them specifically so that you might be considered a Cordarri by law and the spells are put in place to protect you and blood relatives. So right now, only you and I can access your home."

"And Hermione and Draco. I gave them permission." Eleanor reminded.

"Draco has permission to-" Remus began to question, but Sirius bumped Remus' arm with his elbow.

"Another time, mate." Sirius said quietly, causing Eleanor to blush slightly.

"Right, sorry. You are the only person who can break the spells considering they are family spells, and even though I am blood related and can enter the home, I can't break the spells. Because you are the only person to have access to your home and breaking it's spells, I say that you move all of your money from your vault to your home that way it is undetectable if the worst case scenario were to happen and you would be considered betrothed to this Malfoy boy." Remus explained it all quickly and Eleanor was entranced by his explanation of her family's magic.

"Do you think Gringotts would let me empty it?" Eleanor asked.

"Yes, if we act quickly. You are still your own ward and guardian of yourself and will be able to legally take the money. My suggestion is when we go to the vault to get your school money at the end of the summer, we ask to close the account and take the money with us. Gringotts has its ways of transferring physical money compactly, so we don't need to worry about that aspect of it." Eleanor nodded slowly. "Unfortunately, about the betrothal situation, the only thing we can do to prevent that before you come of age next year is for me to legally adopt you and for you to not recognize your parent's legitimacy anymore."

Eleanor simply shrugged. "If Voldemort really wants us to be betrothed, he doesn't need a document saying so. He would torture me to convince Draco, and torture Draco to convince me. I'm assuming, though, that when my money becomes untouchable, he won't care so much about a betrothal."

Remus looked at her sadly, thinking about how her fate might end up. He was thankful for her fortress of a home that would protect her during the worst of times, but he knew that her big heart would put her in danger somewhere along the line.

"Okay, enough with this legal talk, what are we thinking for dinner?" Sirius asked, getting up from the table.

"No, not enough with the legal talk." Remus stood up with him. "It's your turn now. How are we going to get you pardoned?"

"Pettigrew is in hiding and isn't likely to show his face any time soon because the Death Eaters know that will absolve me. I think I'll be stuck in hiding a bit longer." Sirius gave a sad chuckle. "Any other business to attend to, captain?" He asked Remus with lifted eyebrows.

"Yes, I think I would like to return to the fact that you and your boyfriend have a private home to yourselves at any given moment." Remus leaned against the counter and crossed his arms, looking pointedly at Eleanor. Harry cleared his throat and made a move to stand up and leave the room. He and Eleanor had bonded quite a lot since they took up permanent residence in 12 Grimmauld Place, however this didn't mean he completely accepted or liked the fact that her and Draco were now a real item, no matter how Eleanor tried to defend her beloved.

"I live here, don't I?" Eleanor reminded in a light voice. Remus had taken the place of a parental figure, and she still informed when she came and went, but both of them had an understanding that Remus wouldn't come into her life and start disciplining her, not that she needed much. He held her accountable and wanted her to be safe, he asked her reflective questions that made her think about her behavior ("How would you feel if you wanted to cook and the dishes were piled in the sink?" "What's your plan for getting better?", etc.) But Remus never really disciplined. Harry and Eleanor basically had run of the place, as Sirius wasn't a disciplinarian either. This was the first time either of them had seen Remus be actually serious about anything behavior wise.

"It's just slightly concerning to me, as a father, that you can be completely unsupervised at any moment with a boy. You're teenagers and teenagers in love, and not having accountability leads too…"

"Remus," Eleanor put up her hands, stopping him mid-thought. "I would like to remind you of a conversation we had last Christmas where you said certain allowances could be made given the nature of our relationship and what you and your friends got up to when you were my age."

"Moony!" Sirius hissed in false anger, "I'm raising a teenager now too, we can't tell them our secrets, we'll lose all authority." Harry just laughed in the corner.

"Also," Eleanor continued, "I hate to point out the obvious, but last summer we had access to the house as well."

"He wasn't your boyfriend then." Remus countered.

"He was certainly her _something_." Harry added laughingly. Eleanor shot him a look.

"Thank you, Harry." She said through gritted teeth. "Draco and I are smart and will not do anything to disgrace the Lupin-Black-Cordarri-Potter name." She flashed them a smile. The pain of the anniversary of the death of Olga and Darius, her first birthday without them, another summer break from Hogwarts not going on a family holiday, it all passed by Eleanor's eyes. And, of course, it was sad, but she laughed every day here. Those three men filled her heart and life with joy, and there was another one waiting for her that did the same. It wasn't all good, but it wasn't all bad either. She had found little bits of hope and planted a new garden of happiness over the burnt ruins of the old one. "Speaking of, he is waiting for me." Eleanor brushed by Remus and Harry to head to the Floo.

"Where are you going to be?" Remus questioned.

"At my house." Eleanor shrugged. "Draco doesn't want to be seen out so soon after his father's trial, and I have some gardening to do, anyway."

"Yeah, gardening." Harry smirked from the corner. Eleanor grabbed a towel from the counter next to her and chucked it heavily at her friend, her brother now it seemed.

"Harry James Potter!" She yelled as he ducked out of the room.

"Will you be home for dinner?" Remus pressed, looking worried but deciding to bring the whole overprotective act to a close.

"Probably not, I'm thinking Draco and I will cook something. I'll be back around nine or ten tonight." Eleanor promised.

"That's late." Sirius commented.

"And that's enough out of you two." Eleanor rolled her eyes before disappearing into the Floo.

* * *

Coming together had been easy for Eleanor and Draco. It seemed as natural as breathing. However, life outside of their happy little bubble was hard. Lucius was sentenced to life in Azkaban for being a Death Eater. Eleanor had decided not to bring his conspiracies against her parents to light for the sole reason of not wanting to testify against him in court. She never wanted to see the man again. Narcissa was a mess, understandably, but not entirely forgiven by Eleanor. While she didn't help Lucius plan she sure didn't say anything either. Draco, for the most part, lived at Cordarri Castle or with the Zabini's. He almost didn't mind the Death Eater part so much, it was gambling with his and Eleanor's fates that did him in. He was also trying to avoid Voldemort for as long as he possibly could. Eleanor offered him the protection of the Order time and time again, and Draco simply explained that he couldn't completely abandon his mother, whom the Order was not so keen to take in, just as she wasn't keen to join them.

The whole situation made Eleanor fear for Draco's future. What would happen to him when his father's mistakes caught up with him? Eleanor shuddered to think about it.

But when she came to Cordarri Castle and saw Draco lounging and reading, or practicing his Quidditch in the yard, or working on his summer course work, her heart swelled and she was thankful for their time.

"About time you showed up love." Draco greeted, kissing her on the cheek.

"Remus wanted to talk about legal things, then wanted to talk about how you and I needed to be safe spending so much time alone." She rolled her eyes slightly as she wrapped herself in his arms. "You just say the word and I will live here, full-time, with you." She promised.

"No." Draco said firmly. "I miss you, of course, but you're safer with them than you are with me."

"Why do you say that?" Eleanor pulled away to look quizzically into his face, then quickly glanced down his forearms, seeing them still free of a Dark Mark.

"I'm not a Death Eater yet, El. But it's really only a matter of time." He sighed, pushing his fingers through his hair. "He's eventually going to make a threat on my mother's life, and even though I'm not pleased with her right now, I can't let her die."

"Has He?" Eleanor asked. "Threatened your mother?"

"Not yet. He's biding his time, I'd expect." Draco didn't want to look as frightened as he felt, so he shook off the thought and smiled down at Eleanor. "It isn't happening tonight, so I just want to focus on us." He said confidently. Eleanor stood on her toes to kiss him swiftly.

"I'm here to talk, when you want to." She assured.

"Right now, I just want to kiss you." Draco's eyes were mischievous as the pair retreated onto the couch and spent a blissful while lost in each other's embrace. Eleanor thought she could spend her whole life intertwined in Draco's arms. Despite all of the unknowns, he felt like a sure thing.

Her parents had always told her that she wouldn't meet the love of her life when she was young. Her parents had met at work, both of them working in law. They were older, though they knew each other vaguely from Hogwarts, they became acquainted as adults. Eleanor believed that her and Draco were too young to really start planning a future, and with the war brewing and everything feeling so uncertain, it was foolish to try to plan anything at 16 years old. But she loved how he made her feel, and she didn't want to lose that, she didn't want to lose him.

"What do you want from this year?" Draco asked suddenly while Eleanor was kissing his neck softly while laying on top of him, her shorts discarded on the floor, leaving her in a t-shirt and undies.

"Is that really what you're thinking about right now?" She asked in exasperation, sitting up to look at him. He looked hungrily at her.

"I've other things on my mind too." He smirked, playing with the hem of her shirt, which would be the next thing to go. "But I want to know what you want from this year." Eleanor bit her lip thoughtfully and Draco had half a mind to forget this whole "creating goals" endeavor and continue to snog her silly.

"I want for things to go smoothly for our relationship. Everything else is a giant question mark, but I don't want you and I to be." She answered, looking at him with a smile. "And I want you to stay out of trouble. What do you want?" She countered.

"Oh, I want to get into all sorts of trouble." His voice nearly sounded like a growl as he flipped her and pinned her under him and began kissing her furiously. He had once gone months without kissing her, and that was a hell he didn't want to endure again. Eleanor giggled under him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down so she felt his weight on top of her.

"Draco," Eleanor sighed out as the aforementioned trailed soft kisses down her body.

"Hmm." He responded against her skin.

"I think we should go for it." Her voice was so soft, she almost didn't hear it, but Draco did. He lifted his head from her stomach to meet her eyes. Even after 6 months of sneaking around before their big fight, and nearly two months since their devotion of love, they were still an "everything-but" sort of couple. Which Eleanor was fine with, and so was Draco, but something clicked for her as they spent long summer afternoons kissing and talking and laughing. She didn't feel Bridget's presence anymore, it was just her and Draco.

"I don't." Draco replied, though a more primal part of him didn't understand why.

"What?"

"It's only been two months, love." Draco reminded. "I'm happy doing this."

"What if I want more?" Eleanor asked.

"El, the last time I had sex, it was to spite you." Eleanor had heard him say it before, but she still didn't like to be reminded of his intentions. "I'm not going to hurt you like that again." He promised softly. "And I really want to." He assured. "I just, I fucked up last time, and I'm terrified now. I'm not ready. It isn't because of you, it's because of mistakes I've made." Eleanor pouted slightly, but understand and was grateful to Draco for being honest with her. "But, I will keep doing this." Draco's voice got lost as his head lowered further and further.


	26. Chapter 26

Eleanor arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place flushed and very late. She tiptoed through the kitchen as softly as she could, wondering if she should risk Kreacher or Sirius' mother's portrait yelling at her, or if she should sleep in the parlor to avoid Remus and Sirius knowing exactly how late she was.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Eleanor almost felt relief at it being Sirius' voice and not Remus'. But she knew they shared everything, so she would be met with Remus' reflective questions in the morning. For now, the reprieve was appreciated.

"It's late, I know." Eleanor admitted. "We got distracted, then we fell asleep." She explained. It wasn't entirely true, she did fall asleep, but she woke up about 20 passed ten, and decided that since she was already late, her and Draco might as well spend another hour or three kissing, and talking, but mostly kissing.

"Eleanor, I know I don't have to tell you about safety around boys and what to do. Your parents taught you, I'm sure." Sirius said. "I know Remus and I aren't your parents, but you have to understand, that when you are dating a Death Eater's son in a time when Voldemort is trying to use him to get to you and by extension, Harry, it worries us when you aren't home when you say." He let out a breath. "We aren't your parents, but we worry just the same. And it also isn't fun for us to think about what you two might be doing in a best case scenario." Eleanor flushed red.

"I'm really sorry." Eleanor let out, looking at her feet in shame. She wasn't ashamed of her and Draco, though Sirius, Remus, and even (sometimes especially) Harry tried to make her feel this way. She hated that she made them worry.

"I've been thinking," Sirius began, taking a long sip from his tea that was on the table, "I think he should live here."

"Draco?" Eleanor sputtered in clarification. "Here?"

"If any funny business were to go on, it would be right under our noses." Sirius supplied. "And, not to mention the fact that he wouldn't fall into Voldemort's clutches."

"I have actually brought that idea up to him." Eleanor conceded sadly, taking a seat across from Sirius at the table. "He won't leave his mother, not for good. And you've all made it very clear that you won't have Narcissa, and even if you would, she wouldn't come here."

"So we are supposed to let him become a Death Eater, and then, on top of it, let you continue dating him?" Sirius questioned. Eleanor thought for a moment, Draco had made it seem like his becoming a Death Eater was inevitable. The way he had explained it, it was. If he fled, his mother would be threatened with death, so he would come back and take the Mark. Eleanor thought about this dreaded moment, but had never been brave enough to think about what came after. "I mean, I'm guessing you would continue with your..." Sirius trailed. "Harry mentioned that your loyalty to him is withstanding."

"It is." Eleanor replied shortly. "He's not like the others. Maybe he could spy on Voldemort for us."

"A 16 year old boy does not possess the ability to double cross Voldemort, he'd be dead in a minute." Sirius took a deep breath. "Eleanor, I think we need to have a serious discussion about what this war means for you and the Malfoy boy." Eleanor crossed her arms over her chest.

"I know it's...complicated." She huffed. "I'm not trying to be difficult, but he is good."

"Even if he decides to become a Death Eater?" Sirius pressed. "His father and aunt conspired to kill your parents."

"He isn't like his father." Eleanor growled. She knew that there was a point when Lucius was decent, perhaps never truly good, but never truly evil. Not until the last few months. "Or his aunt. If he becomes a Death Eater it's because he was put up to it to protect his mother."

"So who does he love more, his mother or you?" Sirius asked.

"What?" Eleanor sputtered.

"Well, that's essentially what it comes down to, isn't it?" Sirius continued. "Does he love his mother more, in which case he risks your life. Or, does he risk his mother's life because of his love for you. That's the game you're playing here, Eleanor." Sirius hung his head. "I'm sorry, love, but I wouldn't place my bets on you." Eleanor stared at the wooden table top and didn't say a word. Her jaw was set in anger and confusion. She knew he had a point, but as foolish as it might have been, she believed Draco would make the right choice. Something would be worked out.

"What exactly is the point of this conversation?" Eleanor bit out, her bliss from her time with Draco quickly shredded.

"What's going to happen when he becomes a Death Eater?" Sirius' voice was soft but stern.

"Is this you asking me, or are you getting ready to tell me what is going to happen?"

Sirius let out a sigh. "I can't sit idly by and let a Death Eater have easy access to Harry or to you. You're too important."

"I understand where you are coming from, and I respect you, but _I_ can't sit idly by and let Draco go through this alone. He's too important." Eleanor returned, and stood up from the table, she was nearly out of the kitchen when Sirius' voice carried softly in the silence.

"Eleanor," She turned around slowly at the sound of her name. "Moony and I both know what it's like to be in love. You aren't in trouble for that. You aren't in trouble at all." Sirius pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to find the right words. "Sometimes love can be dangerous and we just want to keep you safe."

* * *

The next morning, Sirius and Harry both had a want to get out of the cooped up house. They had decided on a hike at a local trail that was unpopulated so that Sirius could be in his human form, but wouldn't be outrageous for Harry to be walking with a large dog if the need arose. This gave Remus and Eleanor time to themselves. Eleanor was worried that Remus was going to be upset with her for being late, but he didn't even mention it. Perhaps Sirius didn't tell him exactly how late she had returned, or perhaps he did and Remus thought that she had talked enough about it.

"Let's go for coffee?" Remus suggested lightly. "There is a place I want to show you across town." Eleanor placed her book on the couch with a nod and sprung up to get her shoes on. Remus Apparated the two of them to an abandoned alley behind a brick building and the duo slowly made their way to the front.

This coffee shop didn't look spectacular, Eleanor didn't quite understand why they were here, across town, when they could have walked to the ones in their neighborhood. Either way, she walked up to the front to order. The barista looked friendly, there was something inviting about her. She had warm brown eyes, and a round face, her curly, brown hair was cut short, reaching just below her chin. She had a button nose and plump lips. She was quite pretty, Eleanor thought. She noticed as she got closer to the counter that the barista had intense scaring along the side of her face, neck, and arm. The scars looked as though the wounds that caused them were deep and painful. Eleanor couldn't begin to fathom what might have caused them. She looked like she was in her thirties, but no older. She had a kind smile.

"Welcome in." She greeted. "Gorgeous day out there."

"It really is." Eleanor agreed.

"What can I get started for you?"

Eleanor gave her order, then looked behind her to Remus for him to give his. He looked more on edge than usual, which struck Eleanor as odd.

"Have I seen you in here before?" The barista asked Remus with an almost flirty twinkle in her eye.

"Oh, perhaps once or twice." Remus chuckled, shifting his weight.

"You have a memorable face." The barista beamed, writing his order on the cup.

"Because of the…" Remus trailed and gestured to his own light scarring, which looked very similar to the ones the barista held.

"No, no." She shook her head. "Believe me, I see past all that." She gestured to her own body. "It's your eyes, they're very … calming. And you have a nice smile." Eleanor's eyes went wide at the exchange. This woman was flirting with Remus, and he just looked guilty. He wasn't even smooth talking her. Sirius would have a meltdown if he saw this happening. "How has your day been?" She continued politely.

"Good, just grabbing coffee with my daughter." Remus put a gentle hand on Eleanor's shoulder.

"That's so wonderful." The barista beamed. "It always warms my heart seeing people spending quality time together. Best part of my job." She continued to go about ringing the two of them up. "Can I get some names for these?"

"Eleanor." Eleanor provided with a smile, the infectious joy of the barista leaking into the air.

"Really? That's my name!" The barista smiled. "I go by Nora, but my whole family is a long line of Eleanors." She laughed. "I can't stand family traditions, though." Her laughter sounded like bells and Eleanor felt so at peace in the presence of this woman. "What about you, are you Eleanor too?" Nora's eyes looked playfully at Remus, who seemed to immediately get flustered under her gaze.

"Unfortunately, no. Though it would have been an amusing coincidence. I'm Remus."

"Remus," Nora's voice sounded surprised. "You don't meet many of those anymore."

Remus seemed to freeze, Eleanor couldn't tell what was going through her father's head. He looked like a deer caught in headlights, his entire body was stiff. Eleanor could have been imagining it, but his eyes seemed to get rather teary before he cleared his throat.

"W-was there ever an overabundance of Remus'?" He questioned softly, causing Nora to laugh.

"No, I suppose not." She handed them their drinks and Remus handed her a large wad of Muggle money. Eleanor wasn't sure how the Muggle system went but she was fairly certain that Remus had given her entirely too much.

"I'll get your change." Nora smiled.

"No, please." Remus shook his head. "Keep it."

Remus and Eleanor found a table in the back corner.

"You know, Remus, giving women an outrageous amount of money only works in dating scenarios that I don't think you are looking for." Eleanor joked quitely. Remus chuckled back, eyeing Nora as she went about her work. "Why didn't you say something, she was obviously interested? You could have gotten to know her."

"We used to." Remus smiled sadly, taking a sip from his cup. "Her and I used to be quite fond of each other." From the dreamy look in his eyes when he looked at her, Eleanor knew what that meant.

"What happened?" Eleanor asked, leaning forward.

"I was dangerous for her, but I was selfish and kept seeing her anyways. One night, I lost control and I hurt her." Remus supplied, tears brimming in his eyes.

"You didn't do it on purpose." Eleanor grabbed his hand from across the table, understanding now where the scars came from.

"I kept seeing her on purpose. Something is bound to happen when you're…" Remus shook his head in anger with himself and took a deep breath to keep calm. "They had to take her memories, of course, which meant all of what she learned at university. I completely robbed her of her future, put her life in danger. All she has to show for it is her scars, and I get to have you. How is that fair?"

Eleanor was silent for a moment before realizing what Remus had just said. "Y-you mean...She's my…" Eleanor trailed, and spun around to take another look at the other Eleanor. They did look a lot alike, and they had the same name.

"Not the best way to tell you, I know." Remus admitted. "But I need you to understand, really understand, that someone can love you so much and be willing to give you the world, and they can still take everything from you and leave you with nothing. They may not mean to, not directly, but people who love you can still be dangerous for you."

* * *

**BIG NEWS: **Okay so we've met El's mom! This is all exciting and good, but I have something bigger up my sleeve! I've been contemplating how I was going to introduce this for awhile, but I have a short 'year in the life' written about the year Remus met Nora and they got pregnant with Eleanor called All the Lonely People. I was originally going to wait until later in Sun, Moon, and Stars to introduce this little side story, but I've decided to post the first chapter in conjunction with this chapter because of the parallels between Remus and Nora's first encounter and what you just read! I am just posting the first chapter until we reach the point later in the story where Remus tells Eleanor more about his year with her mom! All the Lonely People is in no way required for understanding this story, it's just a fun little extra if you want some more background on how Eleanor was made! Please enjoy and reach out if you have any questions!


	27. Chapter 27

**Hello all! **I'm back again and eager to start launching into the next parts of our story! Looking forward to hearing what you all are thinking!

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"Couldn't Narcissa and Draco both stay at my house?" Eleanor wondered idly aloud to Harry as she lay across the end of his bed and he worked on summer homework. Harry's least favorite topic was the Malfoy family, he'd never said "I told you so," however he thought it every time Eleanor fret over the future of the two who remained out of prison.

"Isn't all of your money going to be there come the end of summer?" Harry reminded, not looking up at her. Eleanor furrowed her brows.

"I mean, if Narcissa is safe, she won't sell me out." She attempted to reason.

"She's still got a sister and a husband not in the safe house." Harry sounded bored and annoyed with her, but Eleanor couldn't stop thinking out loud. Remus' lesson about her mother was not lost on her, she knew what he was trying to do but she wouldn't abandon Draco when he needed her most.

"Why would she protect them? She knows what they did."

"Why would Draco protect her even if he knew it was wrong?" Harry countered. "Eleanor, please, I'm bored talking about this."

"Sorry," Eleanor huffed, not at all sorry. "Just the future of my boyfriend and his mother hangs in the balance, and it's kind of on my mind a lot."

"You'd tell me, right?" Harry questioned, finally turning around. "You'd tell me if he became a Death Eater."

Eleanor didn't know how to respond to this because she didn't know if she would tell Harry, or anybody. Everyone in her life would be against her. She should have been against it, after what his Death Eater family did to her parents. But she understood Draco, he was keeping his mother safe. A sneaking voice in the back of her head asked if the same understanding could be extended to Lucius and even Bellatrix. Eleanor shook the thought loose. They had a choice in the first place, during the first war. They didn't have to pledge their allegiance to Him, they could have said no, but because they didn't, now Draco couldn't.

"I'm concerned that you aren't answering." Harry gave her a quizzical look.

"I'm not even thinking about that, all of my energy is going to protecting him and his mother so that doesn't happen." Eleanor snapped, "So maybe it would be in your best interest to at least act like you care."

"I care about you, not him." Harry clarified. Eleanor didn't want to be a brat, so she did not point out to Harry that caring about her was by extension caring about Draco. "Do the Malfoys not have a second home somewhere?" Harry pondered. "They have enough money."

"They do have a cabin on the coast somewhere, but I've only heard Draco mention it once or twice. They don't spend too much time there."

"Couldn't they go there, maybe put up some protection spells?" Harry tried to figure it out. "It isn't like she works, she could disappear and the only person who would be able to tell would be Voldemort." Eleanor ignored the unnecessary dig about Narcissa's lack of employment and saw a real possibility.

"That could work. The two of them don't have to disappear together. Draco couldn't drop off the face of the earth without the Ministry badgering him about going to school, but Narcissa could."

"Would she?" Harry pressed. "I mean, for all her flaws, she loves Draco too much to just let him go."

"You don't know Narcissa well enough to speak on her flaws, Harry." Eleanor shot quickly. "She does love Draco, but I think she will see reason. Her staying puts Draco at a greater risk. At school, he will be protected."

"Can we trust her to not run back to Voldemort?" Said a sudden voice from the door. Eleanor and Harry spun to see Sirius standing with an uncharacteristically serious face.

"If she believes that Draco will be safe, I think we can." Eleanor answered.

"Will she believe it?" Sirius continued.

"Will he be safe?" Eleanor countered.

"He can stay here. Me and Remus have wanted that for awhile. Voldemort can't touch him here, and he can't touch him at school. If these are the only places he is, we can ensure his safety. And yours, by extension."

"I'll talk to them."

* * *

"Do you think she will see reason?" Eleanor fretted, wringing her hands together in the parlor of Malfoy Manor. She was uncomfortable within the walls, she hadn't been there since before she knew about Lucius' treachery. She couldn't help but think about how vulnerable she had been living under the same roof as the man who plotted the downfall of both her and her precious parents.

Draco reached over and grabbed her nervous hands in his. "I believe my mother will understand that her staying here risks my safety." Draco looked as if there was something he wasn't saying, which put Eleanor more on edge. With her hands that she usually wrung and shook with anxiety now filled with Draco's comforting hands, she began to grind her teeth to release excess worry. "Love, please stop that." Draco murmured lowly.

"Sorry, I'm just a little on edge." Eleanor snapped at him.

"Did you ever stop and think that I might be on edge about all of this too? I mean, I am the one who is being forced to wait and see if the Dark Lord is going to try to kill my family to pressure me into becoming a danger to the girl I'm in love with."

"I know, I know." Eleanor replied sharply. "I'm sorry. It just feels like we are running out of options."

"That's really encouraging, El." Draco rolled his eyes, voice dripping with sarcasm that annoyed Eleanor greatly.

When Narcissa walked into the room, Eleanor could tell a noticeable difference in her weight. Her collarbones stuck out sharply, her eyes seemed to sink into her skull. Her normally polished attire was replaced with a baggy sweater and jeans. Eleanor could not recall a time she had seen Narcissa ever wear jeans. Upon a closer look, she realized that the sweater she wore was Draco's from a year or two before that he had grown out of. Eleanor was shocked by her thick layers, her and Draco were both clad in summer clothes to avoid the heat. Narcissa looked as though it was the dead of winter.

"Draco," She cried, her eyes red as she approached them. "Eleanor! Oh my how things have gotten so mixed up!" Eleanor wanted to scream at her then. It didn't take long for her temper to flare beyond control. Draco sensed Eleanor's back stiffening and squeezed her hand tightly to shut her up. If they wanted this plan to work, Narcissa had to trust them. "Where have you been?" She sniffled to her son.

"That's not important, I've been safe." Draco assured.

"We need to talk about that." Eleanor continued for him. Draco shot her a look that said she should have eased into it a bit more. But it was said, and Eleanor didn't regret trying to get the show on the road. She wanted to be out of this house and have her mind be at least a little at ease.

"I don't want you to feel unsafe here…" Narcissa trailed, looking miserable and helpless.

"Mother," Draco started. "You can't live here anymore. He knows you're here."

"We can't just leave." Narcissa spluttered, her eyes becoming manic. "N-no, no." She shook her head hard. "You're father, he needs us."

"What does he need from us?" Draco tried to keep his voice gentle. "He's in Azkaban. His trial has come and gone, there is nothing we can do for him now."

"My family-"

"They are all Death Eaters." Draco cut her off. "If you don't want me to join him, then you need to be out of reach. I would only serve him to keep you safe."

"Where would we even go?" Narcissa demanded. "This is irrational, you can't just run away."

"The house on the coast. If you put up protection spells, you could stay hidden there. Mother, please, we need to keep you safe, and that means away from him."

"You still have the Trace on you, and you need to attend school. We will take the risks we need to so that you might succeed in life." Narcissa said stubbornly. Eleanor could have rolled her eyes but didn't. Instead she gave a small, reassuring squeeze to Draco to give him the courage to deliver the final blow.

"I won't be going with you." Draco let out, so quiet it was almost a whisper.

"What?" Narcissa asked. "And where do you suppose you'll be?"

"At Hogwarts, and with Eleanor. Either place I'll be safe."

Narcissa stared back blankly. Eleanor couldn't read her face at all, she looked like a poorly sculpted wax figure of the woman Eleanor once knew. "You're too young to be living with your girlfriend. You aren't married." Narcissa finally let out with no tone to her voice.

Draco's eyes bore into his mother's. In a million years, he never expected that to be the answer. "Mum, I think this is a little more complicated than living together out of wedlock." Narcissa continued to shake her head, refusing to listen.

"No. I won't have it, I won't have that sin on my hands." Her lips were trembling but the rest of her face stayed blank. Eleanor watched Draco closely as his mouth fell open. All gentleness from before left his eyes.

"You are being ridiculous." He said firmly. "If I become a Death Eater, I will have to hunt down and kill people, force my girlfriend to marry me and give all of her family fortune to a cause neither of us support, and torture innocent people. You're worried that people will think if I am secretly living with Eleanor that that will be the greatest shame that can come upon this family name? I will not become my father, I do not wish to be like him and for some reason you still want me to be." His voice grew in volume now, his face red from anger.

"Do not speak about your father that way." Narcissa shot back. "He was doing what he could to protect you both, he is a good man!" Eleanor's hand clamped down instinctively at mention of Lucius' 'goodness' and immediately regretted it as it seemed to push Draco's anger at his mother further.

"A good man would not have done what he did. He was offered a way out and he didn't take it, a good man would have. Let me be the man he wasn't by taking the way out. Let me protect this family in the way he couldn't." Draco was breathing hard, keeping his eyes fixed on his mother who was shrinking under his gaze.

Narcissa was silent for awhile. She gave nothing away, she just sat with a blank face. Eleanor was going crazy trying to figure out what she was thinking and Draco's breath was still heavy as he attempted to reconcile with what his true feelings for his father was.

"I can't go to the coast." Narcissa finally breathed out. Eleanor and Draco crumpled.

"Mother…" Draco began to beg, tears nearly forming. He was terrified of what the future held.

"I want to. Well, I don't want to, but I know I must. But Bellatrix knows about it. She'll suspect it."

"The protection spells—"

"My Magic is too weak, His is far too strong. They will get to me." She put her head in her hands. "I don't know what to do."

Draco looked at Eleanor desperately, they needed something. Then it dawned on her.

"Malibu. M-my mother loved Malibu when she was younger, my father bought a cottage there. We went once and I hated the waves, they scared me so my parents never returned. I was looking in my father's office a few weeks ago and saw the deed for it still. Go there. No one knows it's there." Eleanor spilled out before fully thinking it through. "It's surrounded by Muggles, no one will know who you are so you'll be free to roam. It could be like a vacation really, by the beach every day."

Narcissa and Draco looked at Eleanor and neither said a word. Draco was so grateful for her help, but wouldn't dare let himself hope he was in the clear. He couldn't force his mother to leave, and he knew that he wouldn't have the will power to ignore her if she stayed - no matter how much he disagreed with the cause.

"Can I bring an owl to write you?" Narcissa asked quietly.

"It's probably best to use the Muggle mail system, and to talk in code, just in case." Draco admitted. "We can use their lack of knowledge on Muggles against them."

"But I don't have any Muggle knowledge either." Narcissa sounded defeated.

"I know someone who does." Eleanor told her reassuringly. "I'll ask if they can write up some tips for you." Narcissa looked more crumpled by the moment. Draco's heart broke at the sight of his disheveled mother, but he knew it was the only way. The further she was, the safer they both were.

"Mum," Draco said softly, reaching out to take her hand in his, "you're doing the right thing, you're keeping us safe, and you're keeping yourself safe. When this is all over, we'll be together again."

"I'll leave tomorrow night, I just need to pack a bit and get things in order. Will one of you exchange some galleons for Muggle money." Narcissa found her conviction in the reassurance of her son.

"I can do that." Eleanor offered. "I'll leave you two for the night and be back tomorrow evening."

Narcissa fetched her a large bag of galleons and gave her a swift hug, whispering into her ear before she left. "I hope I can make you proud of us again."

* * *

Draco silently packed alongside his mother. They determined that she could only take what was necessary, and it was frustratingly amusing to watch his mother try to decide what was and wasn't important.

"Once they realize I've gone, this house won't be safe for you. They'll start using it as headquarters, remember that." Narcissa told him. "If your father gets out, don't tell him where I am, just tell him I love him." She then turned to him holding a long, winter robe. "Do you think I'll need this?"

"I think you are going to be very hot, and stick out like a sore thumb." Draco teased. "Only bring summer clothes, you're going to be living on the beach."

Narcissa was flustered as she ran around the house trying to hide things of value that she couldn't take with her, giving some to Draco to store in Cordarri Castle, and ordering the House Elves to make sure this Manor never looked abandoned. Draco watched his mother with fascination. She was a complicated woman, every quality seemed to juxtapose the other. She was so resentful of leaving, but trying to do it as quickly as possible. She was upset at Draco for asking her to not be in his life, but so relieved that he had figured out a way to stay safe. She was soft and feircesome, kind and ruthless, put together and also a mess.

"Draco," Narcissa let out softly in the parlor in the early morning hours, her four bags that she had proven she could hold onto and Apparate with at the same time were scattered around her, all messily packed to the brim. "I'm so sorry that we have let you down."

Draco didn't know how to respond to this so he remained quiet for a moment. "It's all going to work itself out. I just need you to be safe."

"I wish you would have known him before." Narcissa continued, her eyes welling up in tears. "Before the war, before he got mixed in with all of this. He wasn't without flaws, but he was good, there was no denying it." Draco cringed for a moment, not wanting to speak about the man who had gotten them into this mess in the first place. "He loves you so much. Everything he did was to protect you. Maybe he went about it wrong, but he loves you."

"It's hard to believe that after all he has done." Draco admitted.

"I know." Narcissa whispered. "Darius and Olga, they were the best thing to ever happen to us. He shouldn't have betrayed them. Those two people did more for us than anyone else ever did. I hope that you can repay them on our behalf by taking care of their daughter."

"That's the plan, Mum." Draco half smiled.

"Be a gentleman to her, remember your manners." Narcissa chided.

"Only if she does." Draco joked in return.

The two continued to talk, and Narcissa would offer him random pieces of advice or information. Draco had a large pile of things to take back to Cordarri Castle after his mother had left, documents and contracts and other important artifacts and information that didn't need to be lost. Eleanor returned in the evening with a large amount of Muggle money. Larger - Draco suspected - than the sum of what Narcissa gave her to work with. He assumed she put a large amount of her own money into this trip for his mother. She also had a few rolls of parchment in her hands.

"Alright, so I have your money. My Muggle intel wrote down how the money works, though the American system is a little different but if you pretend to be a tourist they should help you out. There is also information on the mail system, we will get Draco a post office box in Hogsmeade when we return to school. A lot of the Muggle born students use them so their parents don't have to deal with the owls. I'll have him send the first letter so you know when to start. There is some other information in here like how to use a television and things that all Muggles know how to do. I also packed some of my mother's favorite books for you to read while you're there." Eleanor was trying to give her all of the information she could in as little time as possible.

Narcissa looked overwhelmed at everything Eleanor handed to her, and simply hugged the girl she had watched grow up with sorrow, gratitude, guilt, and hope. "Thank you." She whispered. "You're just like her."


	28. Chapter 28

**Quick Note: **Hello all! My updating schedule has been all over the place, and so has my writing schedule! I'm not as far ahead as I would like anymore, so my time between updates is going to be a little longer so I can buy myself some extra writing days! I always love hearing what you all are thinking, it definitely inspires a spark in me to find extra moments to keep pushing forward with this! Hope you enjoy!

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Moving Narcissa to a different country was, surprisingly, the easy part of this transition. Moving Draco into Grimmauld Place proved to be an entirely different animal. Remus and Sirius had strategically placed Draco at the other end of the hallway from Eleanor so that either of them had to pass in front of all three occupied rooms before reaching each other. This was expected by both Eleanor and Draco. Another expected piece of this new puzzle was Harry hiding in his room while Remus and Sirius talked with Draco and Eleanor in the kitchen about the boundaries that needed to be set.

"I just don't fully see why Draco couldn't live at the Castle." Eleanor finally groaned after Remus stressed for the fourth time about how teenagers in love were harder to control.

"The closer we are, the better we can protect." Remus explained.

"We want to know whatever funny business is going on." Sirius emphasized. Draco seemed extremely on edge to be put under a microscope by two men who loved Eleanor very much. Darius would have never done this to him, but he would never dare say that to Eleanor.

"Harry is going to be very annoyed for the rest of the summer." Eleanor pointed out, knowing that Harry's comfort was very important to the two of them.

"Well, that means that the two of them are just going to have to learn to get along." Sirius shrugged. "Because he isn't going anywhere." His dark eyes bore into Draco, and the latter resisted the urge to shudder. While Draco knew that Sirius Black never killed Peter Pettigrew, there was something eerie and ruthless about the man who spent over a decade in Azkaban. It made him worry about his father. Draco knew he shouldn't give a damn about his father but despite all of the man's flaws he did raise him.

"Do you have any questions for us, Draco?" Remus asked. He was the gentler of the two, but he also wasn't thrilled at Draco living with them due to many factors. The shortlist being his Death Eater parents, his history with Harry, and his serious relationship with his daughter.

"Am I allowed to leave?" Draco asked with a bit of malice in his voice, more than he meant. Eleanor kicked him under the table. "I mean-" he cleared his throat, "to see my friends and all that."

Remus and Sirius exchanged looks. "Remember that you need to Floo from Eleanor's home so it is less traceable, your mother is on holiday on the coast to process her grief if anyone asks, and let someone know where you are and how long you will be there." Remus finally explained his conditions. Draco nodded in response. "This isn't prison, Draco. We aren't trying to be unreasonable, but it is unsafe for you and Eleanor to be roaming about. And once people realize your mother isn't coming back, they'll be asking questions and reporting your movements back to Voldemort. Our first priority is keeping you both safe."

"I'm grateful for your help." Draco said, though it was obvious when he said it that gratitude wasn't completely behind his words. He was grateful for the safety of his mother, and he felt as though the possibility of him becoming a Death Eater was lessening, but he felt the extra precautions were unnecessary and were just going to make it harder for him and Eleanor to be alone. Spending the summer bunked up with Harry Potter wasn't high on his list of desires.

"Are we excused?" Eleanor asked.

"He is." Sirius glanced at Draco. "We want to talk to you a bit more."

"You know I'll just tell him everything later." Eleanor rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I surely hope you will. I, however, don't want to tell Draco what I'm about to tell you, so I would like him to finish making himself comfortable in his room." Sirius smiled tightly, Draco got up quickly and gave Remus and Sirius a nod and Eleanor's shoulder a quick squeeze before disappearing out of the kitchen and up the stairs to his new room.

"Please tell me this is not another talk about male desire because I really, really can't do another one of those." Eleanor shot them both a look.

Remus and Sirius both reddened slightly at her words and looked to each other to see who would be the first to speak.

"Darling," Remus started, "we love you very, very much. We know you have a good heart and that you're very smart. I know that you won't do anything to make this living situation … uncomfortable for the rest of us."

"Also, I can't say for certain, but I'm fairly sure my mother's portrait knows when someone is doing things they shouldn't be behind closed doors, and she will call it out." Sirius added.

"For the love of Merlin, Draco and I will not be having sex under this roof, is that clear enough for you." Eleanor snapped. Both Remus and Sirius nodded quickly.

"We wanted to talk to you about Harry." Remus started. "This transition isn't going to be easy on him. We were all living so well together and we don't want him to feel...forgotten or unloved with Draco here. We know it makes him uncomfortable and he wouldn't have agreed if it wasn't for your safety. So we just ask that you continue to spend time with him, and with us, and try to help Draco keep things civil between them."

"Is that really the big talk that you needed Draco out of the room for?" Eleanor clarified incredulously. "Of course I'm going to make sure the two don't try to kill each other and that our family dynamic stays relatively the same, but is family cohesion really on our top priority list with Voldemort literally trying to kill Draco's mother?"

Remus and Sirius shifted a little in their seats, exchanging glances, basically asking the other to go first.

"Well-" Sirius offered the floor to Remus.

"It has, uh, come to our attention...well, Sirius is the one who heard this-why don't you tell it?" Remus clapped his friends back.

Eleanor watched the two warily.

"We were informed that Draco has, erm, well, he's been with another girl at school." Sirius let out.

"Yes, he was dating someone else for a while during the time that we weren't talking. He and I have dealt with that." Eleanor nodded, hating that this was being brought up and already planning on killing Harry for telling them.

"Well it isn't the dating other girls that concerns us so much, it's the other thing." Remus continued on, looking at the table.

"What other thing?" Eleanor narrowed her eyes.

"We are concerned about the relations he had with this girl." Remus tried to elaborate. "We just want to make sure that everyone is being...safe."

"Oh for Merlin's sake, you want me to go to my boyfriend and ask if he used protection and then report back? Is that what you are asking?"

"In lesser words, yes." Sirius said. "You don't have to tell us the answer, but we would just like to spark a conversation about safety between the two of you that we are unsure if you have had."

"Hey," Eleanor snapped at them, causing both of their eyes to be on her and not on the bloody table or their laps. "Thank you for beating around the bush and making this situation as awkward as humanly possible. Let me take this opportunity to tell you that Draco and I have not had sex, not here, not at Hogwarts, not at either of our homes. I would also like to tell you that my parents had this conversation with me before and have given me all of the knowledge I might need, and I intend to use it when the time comes. So while I appreciate your consistent effort, please, I'm begging you, to stop talking about sex. Thank you." Eleanor pushed away from the table.

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked, equal parts ashamed and annoyed.

"To show Harry some sisterly affection for spreading my boyfriend's business around." Eleanor answered tightly.

She took the stairs two at a time and banged on Harry's door hard. He heard his muffled allowance for entry and swung the door.

"What the hell, Potter?" She demanded, crossing her arms and staring him down from where he sat on his bed.

"Pardon?" He asked.

"I get you hiding out here all day, I really do. I know it must be really hard for you to have Draco living here and I'm trying to make it easier on you both, I'm really trying. But having you tell Sirius and Remus about Bridget doesn't set an awesome tone for their relationship with him. Draco and I have worked everything out already, and I really didn't need to have Sirius and Remus try to give me another version of the sex talk again this week. You haven't had to sit through it, but let me tell you, it's very awkward."

"I didn't mean to have them talk about sex with you, Eleanor. I'm sorry, that's awful." Harry conceded with a bit of a chuckle, seeming as though he didn't really find it awful at all. "I just wanted them to know about Bridget because I know that situation really messed with you and, I don't know, I thought giving them a more clear idea of what happened this year might help them to help you."

Eleanor's anger depleted slightly, and she cracked a small smile at her friend looking out for her. "I appreciate your concern, Harry. But I really think there are some things that don't need to be shared with them."

"Okay, from here on out, it's us against them. I promise." Harry joked.

"Yeah, screw 'em." Eleanor nodded with a chuckle. "Harry, I really love being here with you all. I'm really happy living with you and Sirius and Remus. Happier than I've been in a really long time. I know you aren't Draco's biggest fan but I want things to go smoothly." Harry shot her a look of disbelief. "Well as smoothly as possible where you two are concerned."

"Have you told Malfoy that?" Harry wondered hotly.

Eleanor rolled her eyes at him. "You know, Harry, for the time being, I think Draco is really just happy to not have to fear becoming a Death Eater at every turn. This is a comfort I think you might have in common as you were very much worried about him becoming one. There might be some common ground for you two." Eleanor informed.

"There isn't any common ground between me and Malfoy." Harry stated blankly. "We won't get along, we have nothing in common."

Eleanor waited for a moment and looked Harry deep in the eyes to see if he was really serious. "Um, okay. Well, you're both Seekers, and you love Quidditch so there's _at least _one thing." She offered before leaving the room and continuing down the long hallway to see Draco.

Eleanor tapped on his door twice and waited for Draco's voice to float to her before opening the door. She smiled at him neatly folding his clothes in the dresser drawers and hanging things in the wardrobe. "Getting settled?" She asked lightly.

"As settled as I can with all of the changes." Draco responded, looking up from his crisp fold and shooting her a smile. Eleanor knew how on edge Draco must have been from all of the worries about his mother to living with people who were not his biggest fans. Eleanor was grateful for the sacrifice he had made to not follow in his father's footsteps and to keep both of them safe.

"Thank you," Eleanor walked over to him and planted a gentle kiss on his cheek before wrapping her arms around his torso. "I know it's difficult, but this was the right thing."

"I know it was." Draco nodded. "I hope Mum will be happy in hiding. It will be a nice break for her, I think."

"I think so, too." Eleanor agreed. "It's far from any wizarding community, I think being distanced from all of it will do her some good."

"That sounds nice." Draco hummed lightly. "A break from it all."

"Next summer, once all of the craziness of the trial calms down, let's take a trip. We'll both be of age, we can go wherever we want." Eleanor smiled up at him.

"I'm there, love." He confirmed. "What was the talk about?" Eleanor frowned a little at the memory.

"Oh, they were worried that Harry was going to be uncomfortable and wanted to make sure you both were being civil." Eleanor answered. "Which I told them was going to happen, and I even reminded Harry of your mutual love of Quidditch." Draco cracked a tight smile, trying to be supportive. His issues with Harry went deeper than what a mutual interest of the same sport could heal, but he wasn't going to tell Eleanor that. "And they wanted to make sure that we were using protection when we do decide to have sex. That part was mortifying."

"They really think that we have no self control, don't they?" Draco laughed, giving a now blushing Eleanor a swift kiss on the forehead.

"Well if it were up to me…" Eleanor trailed, moving away from Draco's side and sitting on his bed. She made sure to pack him his sheets and blankets from home, though he said they weren't important. She wanted him to feel safe and comfortable and she was glad to see that he had decided to put them on his new bed.

"Who would have thought you would be the one needing the self control in this relationship." Draco laughed at her frustrated face. Merlin, it was hard for him to hold the illusion of self control; she was perfect. She blew him away every time he saw her and his love for her only grew by the day.

Eleanor huffed and a familiar, warm glow floated to her face as she thought about all of the things she would have liked to be doing with Draco. She respected his time to grow after what had transpired with Bridget, but she was starting to become afraid it was him not wanting to be with her. She glanced around the room, trying to see where Draco had made his mark on things. So far, he hadn't. There were no pictures or decorations, though there hadn't been much of that back home either. Eleanor just wanted him to feel as comfortable at Grimmauld Place as she did. Then someone caught her eye on the bedside table. It was a picture of them at Christmas the year before her parents died, they were sitting under the Cordarri Christmas tree with mugs in their hands, they were both laughing, they were happy there.

"Where did you find this picture?" Eleanor asked, smiling at the two of them caught laughing behind the frame.

"Mum found it for me, actually. She framed it too." Draco answered, sitting beside her on the bed. "I think it captures us at our best, laughing at Christmas."

Eleanor cracked a smile. "Christmas was always the best time of the year for us. We were so happy."

"We're happy now, right?" Draco pressed, grabbing her hand and searching her face for reassurance. Eleanor tore her eyes from the picture and looked at Draco.

"I'm happy now, are you?" Eleanor questioned, the sight of Draco's face filling her heart with overwhelming happiness.

"Despite the world falling to shit, I'm happy." Draco answered, giving her a swift kiss.

"Well, Draco, I regret to inform you that the world is about to get a lot shittier." Eleanor chuckled, falling back on the bed, tucked under Draco's arm. She would never get over the feeling of being close to him.

"I can only expect so." Draco chuckled. "But we're good."

"Yeah," Eleanor agreed. "We're good."

* * *

Breakfast the following morning was an incredibly awkward affair. Eleanor has made a large spread for everyone to enjoy in an attempt to bring about some civil conversation, but it remained quiet.

"Harry, are you looking forward to Quidditch this year?" Eleanor asked, trying to grasp desperately for some conversational common ground.

"Yeah, it'll be nice to not be banned from playing." Harry answered, shooting a pointed look at Draco.

"Likewise." Draco muttered, returning the slight glare back to Harry. Eleanor looked at Remus, begging him for a bit of backup, but his eyes remained on the eggs that his daughter had recently scrambled.

"The Harpies are looking good this year." Eleanor added, hopefully steering the conversation away from Hogwarts Quidditch as that might have been a touchy subject given the year the both of them had to take off.

"Enough about the Harpies." Draco groaned. "I understand you like them because of feminism or whatever but seriously, they aren't that good."

"'Feminism or whatever'?" Eleanor repeated with raised brows. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, they're women. That's awesome. It's a fully woman team, but giving them as much respect as you do is kind of overkill. They just are pretty average for a team." Draco continued. "I'm not against women teams, of course not, but we shouldn't give them more credit just because they are women, right? I'm judging them equally against other teams, and when equality is involved, they just aren't that good."

"Blasphemy!" Eleanor retorted loudly.

"I mean, comparing them to the Chudley Cannons, he's right." Harry put in quietly.

"Oh, you would." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "The Cannons lack any grace on the Pitch, it's embarrassing to watch!"

"But your all-woman team is known for their grace?" Draco asked jokingly. "Hmmm, seems like a stereotype to me." Eleanor felt a glimmer of hope at seeing Harry crack a small smile despite himself. "But the Cannons are an absolute joke. Their glory days are long behind them. Puddlemere United has been consistently at the top of the league, in this century too, which is important."

Eleanor let out an annoyed groan while Harry and Sirius scoffed. "Puddlemere?" They asked in disgusted unison. "That's such a snob team." Sirius huffed in annoyance.

Draco looked at Eleanor with wide eyes, expecting her to be offended on behalf of him, but she simply shrugged. "It's kind of snobby to only like a team that's doing well." She reasoned, taking a bite of toast.

"Is it really so bad that the team I like also does well?" Draco questioned.

"It feels hollow, like do you really love them, or do you just love the secondhand pride, you know?" Eleanor explained. Draco looked at her incredulously.

"I've always loved Puddlemere." He stated.

"And they've always done well. Just think about your reasons for liking them, that's all I'm saying." Eleanor conceded with humor in her voice. Draco felt odd. Conversations like this were fairly normal between the two of them, little heats and joking tones. They laughed together like this everyday. He felt exposed to have other people see it. His friendship and later relationship had always been private, something only he enjoyed, and something he enjoyed in relative secret. He selfishly wanted to keep her all to himself, and sometimes more than that, he didn't want anyone to see the wall she tore down in him.

But now Harry Potter had seen it, a glimmer of his softer self. The hard, cold, Malfoy exterior had a crack and it was Eleanor. It always had been and Draco hoped that it always would be, because it didn't feel entirely bad to not have to think about how he was looking to others. He felt stronger when he didn't have to worry about appearing weak. It felt almost refreshing, like a load taken off.

Maybe, Draco thought, Eleanor had been onto something about him being less cold for all of those years.


	29. Chapter 29

**Hello! **Let me know what ya think!

* * *

Eleanor sucked in a breath and gave a quick tap on Draco's door. Living under the same roof as him brought back some memories of the previous summer, however their freedom was decidedly less at Grimmauld Place and they wanted it decidedly more at the present moment.

She opened the door a crack but didn't leave the door frame. She was here to deliver a message and couldn't get sidetracked as she often did with him. "Hey, I have to tell you something." She let out quietly. Draco looked up from his broom, which he was just finishing up polishing. "With Harry's birthday coming up there are going to be a lot of people around here for a bit. I just wanted to give you a heads up."

Draco furrowed his brow at her. He had figured it was going to be a full house for Potter's birthday and couldn't tell why Eleanor looked so on edge when telling him. "I suppose that us bunking up is out of the question?" He joked lightly, trying to show her that it didn't bother him. To his relief, she cracked a smile.

"I say you suggest it and see what happens." She laughed in return. "And…" she trailed off, not making eye contact. "There's going to be quite a few meetings going on…" She was dancing around the subject.

"And I'm not invited." Draco finished. Eleanor looked relieved that he read her thoughts and released the tension in her shoulders.

"I've fought for you to be." She supplied, trying to lessen the blow.

"They don't trust me." Draco stated. "I get it. I'm not angry."

"I won't go either." Eleanor vowed. "We can be out of the know together."

Draco chuckled at her offer and shook his head. "No, you need to go so you can tell me what they said." Eleanor smiled at him. She was consistently grateful at the effort Draco was putting in to make this awkward situation substantially less awkward, and how he was working towards being on good terms with the other men in the house. She knew it was hard on him that the fruits of his labor were not often seen, but Draco was tenacious and he would not give up. Eleanor was his future, he knew it, so he had to keep working on her family.

He felt different, and it was starting to feel good to be the Draco that Eleanor had always seen in private. He'd even been able to sustain small talk with Harry twice in the past week and he felt an unnervingly large amount of pride at that, it had felt like a win for 11 year old Draco who was gut wrenchingly jealous of the group of Gryffindors who were surrounding his best friend.

He had always felt the need to protect himself and his family first. He put up walls for everyone else because he and his own were the most important. However the last few months had shown him that sometimes the people you trust the most and try the hardest to protect don't take care of you in return. So he had to make the shift from protecting his parents to protecting the family name, protecting his future children, protecting Eleanor, and by extension, Eleanor's chosen family. So he had to change, he had to adapt. It wasn't easy, but this shift in his nature did feel natural to him, it felt natural to adapt to protect people. Even if those people weren't ever who he would've considered himself protecting.

"Will I get to party with the Gryffindors for a change?" Draco teased, Eleanor let out a laugh and finally entered the room and sat beside him on his bed.

"I don't know if you can keep up, Malfoy." Eleanor smiled at him.

"Well, how rowdy can you get with everyone's mum downstairs?" Draco raised a brow at her. "Say what you want about Slytherin parties, but our parents are nearly always out of town, so the party space is abundant."

"Oh yeah, I forgot that a prerequisite to being Slytherin is having absentee parents." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "That's just Blaise's situation. And anyway, I was going to Floo everyone to my place for the night." Draco wasn't sure how he felt about this revelation. For so long, it had felt like that Castle had only belonged to them. He had foolishly believed that it would be their safe haven forever. "It'll be a bit weird having people over again." Eleanor let out, seeming as though she was reading Draco's thoughts. "But there won't be too many people. Just the Weasleys and Hermione and Harry and you."

Draco nodded silently, feeling a familiar jealousy creeping back and trying to swallow it. It was irrational of him to think that Eleanor would keep the Castle for the two of them forever, and it was unfair of him to think that she was spiting him by inviting her other friends over. He was trying to unpack his emotions as they came. Eleanor watched him quietly. "Are you alright?"

Draco was quiet for a moment, then looked Eleanor in the eyes, deciding to be honest, or at least his version of honest. "I've just been doing a lot of thinking lately." He told her. "I have a lot of growing up to do."

Eleanor grinned at him and put her hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. I do too." Her voice was so sincere that Draco was nearly inclined to believe her, but he knew she was already leagues ahead of where he was in the department of processing emotions.

"Any chance that we will get to sneak away during Potter's party?" Draco questioned with a mischievous look in his eyes. Eleanor smirked at him, feeling herself turn into a puddle.

"I thought we were growing up?" She asked with a laugh. He lunged at her mid laugh and pushed her back on the bed, running his hands all over her hungrily as she continued to giggle into his mouth. He hoped that with his new practice of processing his emotions, his guilt over Bridget would begin to dissipate and allow for him and Eleanor to really be with each other in the way they both wanted. But he wasn't there yet. He couldn't kiss Eleanor without thinking of the pain he had caused her with Bridget, and he didn't want that looming over his head their first time.

He fought past the guilt and continued to kiss Eleanor greedily and happily as she smiled and moved with him on the bed. She loved when they had moments like this. She loved being around him, and hearing his laugh, and sharing in his joy, and watching him grow.

"I love you." She whispered softly in his ear as he kissed her neck. He let out a sigh against her skin and his hand snuck up her shirt and grabbed at whatever he could touch.

"Eleanor!" Remus' voice called up the stairs, causing the couple to pause and let out nearly silent groans. "Hermione and Ron are here!" Draco rested his forehead on Eleanor's for a moment, trying to keep the love of the moment there, wishing it didn't have to be interrupted, but ultimately grateful that it was.

"I love you." Draco returned quietly, sitting up so that Eleanor could head down the stairs. She stood and straightened her shirt and rebuttoned her shorts. Draco began chuckling at the sight of her. "Eleanor, you've-" He began, but Remus called her name again, this time walking up the stairs with several footsteps in tow. Eleanor rushed out of the room, hating to be caught behind a nearly closed door, knowing she would get teased endlessly for it. So she met them in the hallway, trying to look casual. Draco leaned on his door frame smirking at her.

"Eleanor, what is that?" Hermione asked with furrowed brows when she saw her friend. Eleanor looked down at herself to see black streaks all over her legs, her arms, her neck, sneaking out from the neckline of her shirt. Eleanor looked at the marks in confusion.

"I-it looks like broom polish." Ron stated, taking a closer look. Eleanor and Remus both went red as tomatoes as she reexamined how damning those streaks of broom polish were. They truly were everywhere. And the culprit was standing behind her, with blackened hands.

From the door frame came a joking tsk. "She is just so clumsy with the broom."

* * *

Eleanor held her head high during the Order meeting, hoping to regain a bit of respect though she knew that Ron had told Ginny and Harry, and either him or Remus had told Sirius who most definitely told Tonks considering the wink Eleanor was given by her when they greeted each other. The room was fully stocked. Some faces were familiar to Eleanor, and others she had yet to converse with. Her and Harry had fought tooth and nail to be included in the meeting. Harry finally used his bargaining chip of being the one that was hunted by Voldemort, which won him nearly every argument.

Kingsley gave updates on the Ministry, and Eleanor felt at ease knowing that he and Mr. Weasley both felt it was strong. Especially after Fudge stepped down. That felt like a victory. "Pettigrew is still high on our priority list, Sirius, I promise." Kingsley added, to which Sirius gave a tight, melancholy smile and a swift nod. It was obvious that he was losing hope. He wasn't nearly as optimistic as the others.

"I've got more company now, so it makes house arrest a bit easier." He supplied. Everyone around the table smiled but they also all knew Sirius, and they knew his restless spirit was tired of being cooped up in his childhood home.

"Diagon Alley is overrun with Death Eaters. Shops are broken into or going out of business every day." Fred relayed sadly as everyone was sharing bits of information they knew.

Molly clutched her chest at the revelation. "Oh you boys, can't you set up shop anywhere else? You're going to give me a heart attack knowing you're down there everyday for work. What if they break into it overnight?"

"That's why we've been living above the shop, Mum." George replied. "Anyone who tries to mess with our shop will find themselves in an absolute maze of boobytraps."

"YOU'RE WHAT?" Molly yelled, obviously unaware that her sons had been living in the Death Eater ridden Diagon Alley.

"The kids can't go and get their supplies there this year." Arthur shook his head. "We can't have them knowing the Malfoy boy is with us."

"Wouldn't that be good, though?" Eleanor piped up. The kids normally didn't speak in these meetings, they simply gathered information. But Eleanor felt like she was the expert on Draco in the group and that she was qualified to speak. "I mean, wouldn't we want Voldemort knowing that Draco is under Dumbledore's protection, and knowing that he can't mess with him?" Eleanor was instantly angry at all of the sweet, condescending smiles she got from everyone in the room.

"Oh, love…" Mrs. Weasley started with a smile. While Kingsley shook his head in an almost laugh, and Tonks winked at her again.

"For the time being, darling, I think that Draco might be on house arrest too." Sirius smiled sadly at her.

"Well I'm not, so I don't understand why—" Eleanor began.

"Voldemort, I'm sure, is currently in a frenzy looking for what remains of the Malfoy family. We prefer to not narrow his scope." Snape provided in an annoyingly drawn out voice.

"He's not an idiot, though. He knows that Draco is with me, and he knows that I'm with you. It wouldn't be a surprise for him." Eleanor answered.

"About that, love," Remus started, "we've been thinking that it might be best if you stay as hidden as possible for the time being as well."

"What?!" Eleanor shouted out. "That's ridiculous. Harry's fine to wonder about and he's the bloody boy who lived. He's only killed Voldemort three times already, I'm willing to bet he's got a grudge."

"We believe Voldemort is biding his time with Harry, however with him losing access to the Malfoys, and by extension you, he's angry and vengeful and in need of resources." Tonks answered. Eleanor began to bite on her thumbnail in frustration. "We also believe that Death Eaters have been ordered to not touch Harry, but we don't believe that same consideration has been given to you or Draco."

"This is fucking ridiculous." Eleanor murmured under her breath as her thumbnail stayed firmly between her teeth. Sirius cracked a smile at her language while Snape made a big production of rolling his eyes. "I mean in what world does Voldemort not have enough resources. Two old families with money is a lot, sure, but he's got dozens more. Do we really make that big of a difference?"

Tonks took another breath "We are unearthing some documents in the Ministry…"

"Tonks." Remus said sharply, warning her to stop. Eleanor waved him off, her eyes fixed on the currently purple haired woman in front of her.

"She deserves to know, Remus." Mad-Eye agreed suddenly. Remus looked desperately to a stoic Dumbledore, who had yet to say a word. Dumbledore simply gave a nod. Eleanor wished Draco was there to calm her heart, or at least hold his hand. But Harry was a fine second as he rested a hand on her shoulder.

"He had plans for you and Draco." Tonks said slowly. Eleanor wanted to roll her eyes, this was information she already knew, and still came back to the money. "In the documents there was mention of a third loyalist." Eleanor furrowed her brows.

"I don't understand."

"It seems Voldemort was expecting you and Draco to have a baby." Sirius finally said. "We don't know why and we don't know how he was going to ensure that, but it is very important to him. We don't know his reasoning or his plans."

"It comes up rather frequently. A top priority, it seems." Mad-Eye put in.

Eleanor was quiet for a moment, it had to be more than money, but she couldn't understand what the motive would be. "Do you have any theories?"

"A few, but it always feels like we are missing something." Tonks said. "We don't want to give you any false ideas."

"I want to hear them." Eleanor nodded.

"Darling, it doesn't matter. If you stay hidden, those documents will never affect your life." Remus urged, eyeing everyone around the table, silently telling them to keep their mouths shut.

"Have we not thought about lighting the bloody things on fire?" Eleanor let out, exasperated.

"I wish it were that simple." Remus smiled sadly, kissing Eleanor's hair.

"We are going to keep you safe." Tonks promised. "That's our first priority." She reached across the table and grabbed Eleanor's hand firmly. "For all of you." She added, looking at all of the kids sitting around the table. "When we find answers, we'll tell you."

* * *

"I'll give them the documents my mother gave me. Maybe there is something in there." Draco promised firmly as Eleanor sat in his bed, tucked under his shoulder. She had just recounted all of the information she learned in the meeting as quickly and efficiently as she could despite her brain being fuzzy from all that was revealed.

"Yeah, maybe." Eleanor nodded. "I don't know what he could possibly want with a baby of ours." She let out a sigh.

"We'll just stay hidden." He said. "I agree with them, why risk it? There's too many questions in the air."

"Aren't you curious to know why though?" Eleanor pressed.

"Maybe he's a baby person, El, I don't know." Draco tried to joke, but it only caused Eleanor to frown further.

"And they have no idea where Peter Pettigrew is either, so things aren't looking up for Sirius."

"Pettigrew is with my aunt." Draco supplied casually. "At least until Snape gets back from school, then I think he's staying with him." Eleanor shot up out of him embrace to look at him.

"Snape?" She asked incredulously. "What?"

"That's what I heard my mum tell my dad anyway." Draco slowed his voice and looked at Eleanor's concern with confusion.

"But Pettigrew is with Snape?" Eleanor clarified, her heart racing and eyes wide. "What exactly did you hear them say?"

"They were just talking about what my aunt had said. My mum said that Aunt Bellatrix was staying with Pettigrew, but didn't know if she would stay there when Snape returned from school." Draco rushed out, his anxiety growing at the sight of Eleanor beginning to hyperventilate.

"Snape is a Death Eater?" She asked through breaths.

"I can only assume."

"Come with me." She demanded, dragging Draco out of his bed. "We need to tell Dumbledore."

"Why?" Draco asked. "Voldemort in disguise taught at the school for awhile, Snape's a fine teacher, he hasn't tried to kill Harry yet." He was trying to joke.

"Snape is part of the Order." Eleanor snapped at him, and Draco paled.

"He knows I'm here." Eleanor nodded once.

Eleanor felt huge relief when she walked into the kitchen and Dumbledore was still sitting at the table, looking over documents with Remus, Sirius, and Tonks. Everyone else had left for the evening, and were to return tomorrow, but the four adults had decided to continue to look over the new documents that had been found regarding Draco and Eleanor.

"We need to talk." Eleanor said sharply as she closed the kitchen door. They all eyed the young couple.

Remus nodded. "We do." He agreed. "We might have found something in here." Eleanor's interest was piqued, but she couldn't let it distract her.

"Us first." She insisted, then looked to Draco.

"I think Snape is a Death Eater." Everyone's eyes shot up, except for Dumbledore who remained emotionless. "And I think Pettigrew is staying with him." Sirius frowned and began to grit his teeth. Eleanor could see all of the things he was not saying behind his eyes.

"What makes you say this?" Dumbledore wondered quietly.

"My mother was talking to my father about Pettigrew. They said my aunt was staying with him until Snape returned from school." Draco relayed once more, he had not realized how vital this information had been until this moment. He had never been in an Order meeting, he never knew who was there. He assumed everyone knew of Snape's allegiances.

Dumbledore seemed to be taking in this information and processing quietly. "This is a misunderstanding." He said quietly. "Is it possible that this could have been a joke between your mother and her sister?" Dumbledore suggested. Eleanor's mouth hung open.

"Weird fucking joke." She spat out before she thought better of it. But she didn't have the heart to pretend to look guilty for it.

"I suppose you're right, Miss Cordarri. And I have never known those two Black sisters to be of comedic nature." Dumbledore began to stroke his beard. "This is quite interesting. I'll have to discuss with Severus immediately, if you'll excuse me." Dumbledore nodded, and Disapparated from his chair.

Everyone sat dumbfounded for a moment before Eleanor choked out. "If Snape is a Death Eater, he knows where Head Quarters is." She paused. "He knows where we are."

"You two are safe." Tonks assured. "We won't let anything happen to you." Eleanor believed they would try, but was frightened by the force they would be hit with if Snape let slip their location.

"Tell me what you found out." Eleanor suggested, trying to relieve one anxiety with another.

"It can wait." Remus waved off, and Sirius continued to grind his teeth in anger.

"Tell me." Eleanor demanded.

"Well here in the document there are lists of privileges and consequences having to do with the 'third loyalist'." Tonks began to explain. "A privilege would be a supervised hour with the baby. A consequence would be time away and so on. Since these privileges and consequences are outlined in the contract, it looks like you consent to having it be done, so a plea against it wouldn't hold up in custody court. We're thinking that Voldemort intended to use this baby as a bargaining chip. The more you do on his behalf, the more privileges you get with the baby and vice versa."

"This seems overly complicated." Draco observed, his eyes raking over the spread of new papers.

"That's what I was thinking too," Tonks sighed, "my only theory is that someone on the inside was stalling, taking the most complicated route to try to spare you two. It's all flowery, confusing, and complicated."

"Dad," Draco muttered quietly, everyone still heard him though. He smirked a little too himself. "Sounds like something my father would do."

"It would make sense," Tonks nodded, "he didn't outwardly disobey Voldemort but he made it extremely complicated. It seems like the plan just kept building and building to a grandiose maze when really a simple threat on either of your lives could have gotten the intended result." Tonks shook her head quickly. "Not that you would have given in, I didn't mean like that, just that whoever drew up these plans went the very long way around to buy some time."

Draco, still angry and untrusting of his father, felt a glimmer of pride. His father, unable to be boldly defiant, worked against the most feared wizard to try to buy him and Eleanor some time. It wasn't a win and it didn't absolve him, but Draco saw the tiniest shine of love in that action.

"I'm confused though, I didn't sign it, so wouldn't this not hold up as soon as we're both of age?" Eleanor asked. "If my parents signed it under the Imperius Curse then that signs me away, but once I'm 17, this no longer applies no matter what."

"That's what we thought too." Tonks nodded. "But we also found that this document also finds you to be mentally unfit parents, giving all rights of any baby to your parents, and now, because of this contract, to Voldemort. He knew that neither of you would be loyal to him on your own accord, but rather than just kill you, he wants your resources and your connections to the Order, so he needs a baby to hold over your heads."

Through his anger, Sirius was still able to sarcastically bite out. "Another reason to remain celibate, right?"


	30. Chapter 30

**Hello, hello! **I hope you're all staying well during the absolute madness happening in the world right now! Take care of yourselves! Let me know what you think!

* * *

Snape paced in Dumbledore's office, trying to think of how to get themselves out of this situation. Dumbledore sat behind his desk, infuriatingly quiet. "You're going to turn me in, aren't you?" Snape questioned, trying not to sound panicked. Dumbledore shook his head.

"No, I'm not going to turn you in." Dumbledore answered calmly. "You will, however, not be welcomed in the Order anymore."

"I figured as much." Snape nodded, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I didn't know Draco knew this much."

"I will tell them that I found no evidence of you being a Death Eater, but as a precaution, I obliviated your memories from the Order and will keep a close eye. I will give you any information that you might need to relay to Voldemort." Dumbledore decided firmly. "You might have some students who view you as an enemy this year, Severus."

"I suppose it's nothing new." He rolled his eyes. "Taking Draco under your protection is sending Voldemort into a bit of a frenzy. His carefully laid plans for the two of them are being disrupted, he doesn't know how he is going to get into the school this year." Severus let out a sigh and looked at Dumbledore's hand, where a slight rot was beginning to set in. He knew they only had a limited amount of with the assurance of Eleanor and Draco doing his bidding inside of Hogwarts gone, the Dark Lord was particularly unpredictable. "What about Pettigrew? They won't let the memory of him go so easily."

"I found no evidence, Severus. They're going to have to trust me."

"You're not giving them much reason to. The girl is seeing right through you. She's scared and angry and now will find you untrustworthy." Snape pointed out.

"This is all for the greater good, Severus. They just don't know it yet."

* * *

At the next Order meeting, Draco was invited. It was unspoken that he should stay quiet, and it was outwardly spoken several times that Eleanor should also. Dumbledore revealed to them his conclusion with Snape, and Sirius got up and left the room. Everyone pretended that they didn't hear glass shattering, then him getting scolded by both Kreacher and the portrait of his mother. Eleanor and Harry exchanged sad glances at his obvious pain. Eventually everyone dispersed, but Tonks decided to stick around and make sure everyone was doing okay. Eleanor was thankful for her presence. It seemed to be helpful to both Remus and Sirius to have another adult around, and Eleanor wasn't entirely opposed to having another woman around either.

"Are you all still going to your home tonight, Eleanor?" Remus asked as he was making some tea.

"Yeah, we're about to all head out actually." Eleanor said.

"I think Sirius has resigned himself to the attic for the night, the day's not been easy on him." Remus said remorsefully.

"Well, I'll stick around and keep you company, Remus." Tonks put in with a smile. "Can't let you go lonely."

"Oh, you don't have to." Remus shook his head. "I'm sure you have far more fun plans to partake in."

Tonks shook her head with a tinkling laugh. "More fun than you, Remus? I don't know if I'd be able to handle that."

Eleanor smirked as the two of them began to joke and took it as her sign to leave the kitchen. Her friends were all standing around the Floo expectantly. Eleanor Floo'd them all into her home one by one until the twins, Ginny, Ron, Harry, Hermione and Draco were all standing in her living room, looking around at the size of where she grew up.

"Your living room is bigger than our whole flat." Fred let out. Draco felt oddly humbled watching the genuine shock on the faces of her friends. He'd grown up being in and out of Eleanor's home so the size had gotten lost on him. Her family was centuries old and had always been well off. This castle had been established with the early Cordarri's and only got updated as the centuries went on. Eleanor rubbed her neck uncomfortably.

"Uh, how bout a tour?" She suggested. They all nodded silently. Eleanor walked them through the grandiose kitchens, the entertaining dining room, a few dens, and living spaces, the ballrooms, then she walked them up the stairs and showed them where the many rooms were, though she only went into her own. She showed them the huge library, which excited Hermione beyond words. Draco noted how she left her parent's bedroom and study off of the tour. Eleanor was most excited to show them the gardens, which she lovingly maintained. She had a real green thumb. They walked the ground for a bit, there were several acres of fields, and old barns that had held animals in them a few decades previously, but Darius' mother and Olga both were severely allergic, and the barns had since been empty. She walked them to the dock and the boathouse, which Draco had nearly forgotten was there. It had been a long time since they spent any time on the lake, but when they were kids, it was their favorite place to be.

"In the summers when we were kids, our parents would sit on the dock and me and Draco would be sitting in inner tubes on the lake and they would charm them to go fast, do spins and fly up in the air and me and Draco would have competitions to see who could hold on the longest." Eleanor laughed at the memory as the group sat on the dock and stared out at the vast, but private lake.

"Who would win?" Ginny asked.

"Me." Eleanor stated quickly. "Every time."

The group looked to Draco, expecting a protest from him, but he nodded. "Every time." He repeated. "She would not let go for the life of her."

"I think I gave myself whiplash a few times by simply refusing to let go. I was terrified of falling in the water." The group chuckled lightly, but were still in complete awe of Eleanor's home.

"There's just so much room." Harry said quietly, looking out over the lake.

"You could fit a whole army here." Ron added.

Eleanor shifted a bit. She knew her home was extravagant. Centuries of buying land, adding on, her ancestors becoming richer, some becoming more greedy had left the Castle to become a huge expanse. And Eleanor had always just called it home, she'd never really taken into consideration how many people could fit in the home. It had always been just her and her parents.

"I can see why Voldemort wants all your money." George eventually joked. "You seem to have a lot."

Eleanor shrugged with a small smile. "Took a few centuries for the family to get here, but here we are, I guess." She paused, feeling uncomfortable and very unworthy of the great expanse her friends were in awe of. "I'm ready to start drinking. Have we decided if Harry is taking a shot for every year he's been alive, or just every year that he's almost been killed?"

* * *

Back at the house, and a few hours later the group was sufficiently drunk. Draco was trying to integrate himself into the madness but was still rather sober, at least comparatively, and had remained quiet. Small talk with Harry was something he had been able to achieve on occasion, but entering into the seven-way banter between the Gryffindor friends was proving itself difficult. As everyone began setting up Eleanor's dining room table for a Muggle game Hermione was determined to teach them, Eleanor slunk to be by Draco. Her cheeks were pink and her eyes were glassy, and her smile was wide when she saw him.

"You're not still thinking about sneaking away, are you?" She asked playfully.

"I'm always thinking about sneaking away when you're concerned." Draco returned, wanting to plant a kiss on her rose tinted cheek, but hating the idea of anyone else seeing it.

"At least pretend like you're trying to keep up, this is almost embarrassing." Eleanor joked, reaching for a bottle for him to take.

"I really just enjoy watching you have so much fun." Draco countered, not accepting the bottle from her hands.

"Bullshit." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "You don't have to be sharp tonight. No reason to keep your wits about you, we're all friends here, remember?" Draco sighed inwardly, hating and loving that she was reading his mind. He took the bottle from her and began drinking it quickly, to Eleanor's delight.

"Okay, this game is ridiculous, why would I drink out of a cup that a ball that everyone has touched has been in? That's just disgusting. There is no way that Eleanor doesn't have a pool table around here somewhere." Fred told Hermione loudly, pushing the plastic cups back into her hands.

"Billiards room is down the hall." Eleanor returned, grabbing a large bottle off of the table, and Draco grabbing a few smaller ones as they made their way down to the Billiards room. Eleanor's father was horrendous at it, her mother was rather good but had no one decent to play against, except on occasion, when Narcissa would accept. Eleanor had been told that her grandfather was an expert player, and had made the Billiards room his office, and every man he had a meeting with had to play him.

"Alright," Fred clapped excitedly at the sight of the pool table and George began to set up the balls. "Boys versus girls plus Ron."

"Hey!" Ron shouted out.

"That's stupid." Ginny shook her head. "You can't play pool with eight people you dolts. Two versus two then two versus two then winners play."

"That's a lot of pool." Fred shook his head.

"Good, then Hermione and I will get you out quickly so you don't have to play it all." Ginny laughed. Eleanor didn't mind the set up, she had hoped for a moment or two for Draco and Ron to be able to talk. She was betting on Harry warming him up but from the unimpressed glare Ron had been giving the blonde all night, Eleanor was not convinced he had.

With the sound of pool balls smacking and loud banter between the twins and Ginny as background, Eleanor strived to make small talk.

"Looking forward to school?" She asked hopefully, her drunk head spinning slightly. She wondered if they were even drinking given their current silence. Harry was usually quiet when he was intoxicated, save for a few wicked jokes that he unleashed at the right time. But Ron being quiet was something new, he and Eleanor were both very happy drunks and found lots of joy in laughing with each other. "I really just need to get the results from my OWLs back." Draco wanted to roll her eyes at her obvious trying, but remained stoic and continued to drink. "How do you think you all did?"

"I mean there was a bit of a distraction during our last one." Ron muttered out. Eleanor laughed a little.

"That's true." She nodded. "That was rather brilliant of your brothers, I must say. I didn't really appreciate at the time because we were, uh, panicking."

"And planning how to break into the Ministry." Harry put in. Draco stiffened beside Eleanor, knowing this was the night his life changed forever. The night they were talking about was the night he lost respect for his father.

"Yeah, that." Eleanor huffed out. She took another sip of her drink. "That happened this year." She nodded slowly. She chewed on her lip slowly and tried to find another topic to talk about. "I'm glad you could all come over and see where I grew up." She finally tried, settling for meaningless small talk.

"Yeah," Harry breathed. "I'm kind of angry about that." Okay is maybe not so meaningless.

Eleanor looked blankly at him for a moment trying to keep her thoughts from jumbling. She grabbed Draco's hand when he had opened his mouth to say something. "What do you mean?" She asked carefully.

"Seeing this place just makes me angry." Harry repeated, earning a nod from Ron as if the two had been in cahoots about this.

"What about it?" Eleanor was biting down on her cheek, anger flashing through her. Her home made him angry? What did that even mean? It was her home, not anyone else's, it didn't matter what they thought. The alcohol mixing with her dedication to home was making her feel like spitting fire, but she was trying desperately to hold her tongue.

"It's so big." Harry stated simply, as if that was enough of an answer.

"Yeah, it's big." Eleanor snapped. "Sorry my house is big, I guess."

"I don't care that it's big." Harry snapped. "I care that it's big and you never once thought that maybe Sirius would like to live here."

Eleanor stared at him, dumbfounded. She had truly never thought of that. She had thought for a while of asking Remus, but didn't want him to be away from Sirius. Why couldn't Sirius live in her home? They had a lake to swim in, grounds to walk on, barns that they could fill with animals for him to interact with and take care of. His mother wasn't on the wall screaming at him, Kreacher wouldn't be muttering at him. It would be bright and open and new.

"I never—" Eleanor started to say.

"You were just keeping this place a secret so you and Malfoy could sneak away and snog each other while Sirius has been losing his mind in there!" Harry continued, his irritation showing clearly on his face and in his words and Ron nodding along in agreement. Draco was being uncharacteristically quiet in the face of Harry and Ron's anger, which Eleanor supposed was a sign of progress but still made the situation odd.

"I wasn't thinking." Eleanor retorted. "I'm sorry I wasn't thinking." She shook her head, trying to think of how she could have been so stupid, so selfish. It wasn't like her. "I'll talk to them, of course. It's a wonderful idea."

But Eleanor could only feel shame and guilt because perhaps Harry was right, that somewhere in her brain, she wanted an escape plan with Draco.

* * *

Eleanor had never felt more selfish in her whole life than she did at the moment she sat across from Sirius, Remus, and Harry the next day at breakfast. She had pondered all night what Harry had told her, and the timing of the realization of Snape's untrustworthiness made for the perfect time to transition.

"I realized that I haven't been thinking." Eleanor finally let out to the group around her, who were all interested, and a little worried, as to why she called a family meeting. Draco and her had talked it over for the majority of the night, and while he still felt a sense of ownership over the memories Eleanor's home held, he knew the right choice was to move there. "It makes more sense for us to live in my home than here."

"What?" Remus asked, he had not expected this to be what they would be discussing. Harry narrowed his eyes at her slightly, trying to figure Eleanor out.

"Well I was just thinking, there is so much room to spread out, and we've got massive grounds. The protection spells on that place are no joke, so we'd be safe, which is really important now with Voldemort, and with Snape being shifty. We could still have the Order headquarters here, but we wouldn't be living here, which would maybe be nice for you, Sirius?" Eleanor rambled, looking at the table to avoid seeing their looks of annoyance of how long this took for her to ask. She was positive that they had been thinking this the entire summer thus far.

"Are you sure this is something you're comfortable with?" Remus asked cautiously, eyeing Sirius in suspicion. "That's your home, we know it's very special to you." Eleanor's eyes snapped up to meet his in shock. She was expecting nothing but annoyance from them as she had received from Harry the night before.

"You don't have to give up your safe haven just for us, love." Sirius put in, smiling at her with gleaming eyes. He almost seemed proud of her, Eleanor refused to believe it as she had just spent the greater part of the summer being extremely selfish.

"I think it's the right decision." Eleanor said with a firm nod. "I've been selfish and haven't thought about any of you. I know we are a bit cramped here and having headquarters here is another added stress." She began listing reasons again. "And I want to go home again. Live there with people I love again."

Remus and Sirius smiled widely at her. "We'll be there within the day."


	31. Chapter 31

As the remaining weeks of summer began ticking by, the joy in Cordarri Castle was on the rise. Everyone could see a marked change in Sirius' demeanor as he was able to roam the grounds freely and wasn't surrounded by the constant reminder of his pained family history. Draco was grateful for the ability to put distance between himself and Harry. He felt more in control in Eleanor's home. He grew up there, he had the memories here, he felt as though he had more domonion than anyone else, which was beginning to restore his confidence.

Eleanor always had a bit of a nervous energy around her. She hadn't stopped feeling guilty for not thinking of this solution sooner. She was obviously trying to make up for her guilt by playing perfect hostess, making sure everyone's needs were met quickly and efficiently. Draco hovered around her, wanting to be helpful but feeling a little misplaced. He felt more comfortable at the castle than he did at Grimmauld Place, but he was still figuring out his new role in this new organization with these new people. For someone who grew up in an old family that was loyal to their traditional ways, all of the new was confusing him. He just wanted things to slow down. He knew he was safe, he knew what he was doing was right, but it was hard to be just sometimes.

Harry and Draco grew very good at avoiding each other in the castle, which comforted them both. However, much to Eleanor's delight, their interactions when they were forced to be in the same room, were usually civil - though seldom friendly. So it came as a shock when Harry knocked on Eleanor's door one afternoon as Eleanor and Draco were sprawled on the bed playing cards.

"This is hardly what I was expecting when I came up to find you. I was prepping for the worst." Harry said jokingly.

"You all think so little of us when we have given you no reason to." Eleanor sat up and crossed her arms.

"Have you forgotten about the broom polish incident?" Harry asked, leaning against the doorframe, laughing slightly. Eleanor's mouth dropped open and she looked at Draco in shock that this story was being brought up again. Draco simply turned his mouth into a thin line and cringed slightly.

"The broom polish incident was pretty bad…" He let out quietly.

"Oh Merlin, it was, wasn't it?" Eleanor hid her face in her hands at the memory of it.

"Anyway," Harry continued from the door, still chuckling softly at Eleanor's mortification, "our OWL scores came in, and so did our supply lists." Draco shot up and began walking out of the room the moment the words left Harry's mouth, while Eleanor was more reluctant to face her scores and the reality of her boring classes due to her lack of imagination when it came to her future career.

"Bit excited, is he?" Harry muttered to Eleanor as they walked slowly down the stairs and into the kitchen where the mail was waiting.

"He studied really hard for them, and he's been hoping to get good enough grades to get into a program with the Ministry after Hogwarts."

"He wants to work at the Ministry?" Harry wrinkled his nose slightly.

"I know, I know. Politicians can be kind of sleazy, but I think he really wants to right the wrongs done by his father. Both in the Ministry and otherwise." Eleanor explained.

"He told you that?" Harry clarified.

"In lesser words." Eleanor smiled sadly. "He's been going through a lot needing to rethink his loyalty to his family. I think he really just wants to make the Malfoy name one that is remembered positively. Don't tell him I told you that though, he'll get embarrassed."

"Yeah because me and Malfoy sit around gabbing about things you've told us." Harry rolled his eyes a little and nudged Eleanor's shoulder playfully as the pair entered the kitchen. Draco had his nose already deep in his letter, and he handed Eleanor hers without looking up.

Eleanor slowly peeled the envelope open and began unfolding the parchment, the sheer lack of Os and Es on the page caught her eye immediately and she almost wanted to look away. Eleanor didn't always struggle with school, but it had been a hard year for her. She bit firmly on her thumbnail as she began reading.

**Astronomy ** **P **

**Care of Magical Creatures E**

**Charms A **

**Defense Against the Dark Arts A **

**Herbology O**

**History of Magic D**

**Muggle Studies P**

**Potions T **

**Transfiguration A **

She looked up from her page with a twinge of shame. Draco and Harry were both smiling slightly to themselves as they read their scores. Remus and Sirius entered the kitchen from the patio door with cups of tea in their hands.

"OWLs?" Remus asked with a supportive smile, walking straight to Eleanor who folded her parchment in a hurry and stuffed it back in the envelope.

"As expected." She answered shortly, shoving the envelope into the pocket of her shorts. This caused Draco's eyes to snap up to look at her. He seemed like he wanted to say something but his mind was preoccupied with his own good marks.

"Oh they can't be that bad, my love." Remus said, putting an arm around her shoulders.

"It's fine." Eleanor shrugged him off and walked towards the pantry to grab something to eat.

"How about you, Harry?" Sirius asked, looking over his godson's shoulder and letting out a small 'whoop' of praise when he saw it. "Look at that!" He took the parchment from Harry's hands to examine it closer. "You obviously got your mum's brains, huh?" He asked excitedly. "Looks like you and your dad got the same History of Magic grade." He continued laughingly. "I'm so proud."

"How'd you do, Draco?" Remus asked politely as Eleanor's head remained firmly in the pantry, trying to hold back tears at her own mediocrity.

"Uh, well…" Draco seemed reluctant to share, though Eleanor knew he would normally love the opportunity to boast. He didn't seem to want to do it in front of her. "Mostly E's, an O here or there." He tried to sound nonchalant but everyone could tell he was proud.

"Well that's very good." Remus said kindly. "Eleanor, love, let's take a walk."

Eleanor rolled her eyes at his request, knowing he was going to try to comfort her by telling her that she had been through a lot and that it was normal for grades to fall. Eleanor didn't want to hear it because it wouldn't make her feel any better.

"I really don't want to talk about my OWLs." Eleanor let out an annoyed voice.

"Oh good, neither do I." Eleanor furrowed her brow and turned to face him in confusion. She began to walk out onto the patio with him, thinking it could be more information about what Voldemort had wanted with the potential future child of her and Draco, though Remus had been intentionally mum on the subject as of late. "McGonagall wrote to me." Lupin said as the two entered the garden that Eleanor lovingly tended to.

"Oh?" Eleanor asked, fear gripping her heart that her head of house was disappointed in her.

"She has been contemplating some possible schedules for you this term and wanted my input. I, however, want yours." Remus began, pulling parchment out of his pocket and looking at the different options that McGonagall had apparently outlined. "It seems as though there are not a lot of NEWT level classes for you, considering many of them require an E," Eleanor began fidgeting with her hands and tears filled her eyes. "McGonagall and Flitwick are willing to take you into their classes because they know what a trying year you had and how good you are at Transfiguration and Charms. Obviously, Hagrid and Professor Sprout are very excited to have you back."

"So a schedule with only four classes? What an absolute joke." Tears did fall out of her eyes now.

"Well, you could do only four if you wanted to. But Both Hagrid and Professor Sprout have asked you to do some extra work, helping prep for classes, assisting in teaching some of the younger students." Remus spilled out quickly. "You could do one, or you could do both on top of your classes. McGonagall thinks you have a bright future in caretaking, in many fields."

"Caretaking?" Eleanor repeated in shock. "What a sexist stereotype I've fallen into. I am only good for taking care of others because I'm a woman?" Her breath was coming heavily.

"No, my love, it isn't because you're a woman." Remus put his hand on her back. "It's because you have a good heart and a knack for making others feel loved."

"What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Take care of people's pets? Or become a damn gardener?"

"There are a lot of options that working with Hagrid and Professor Sprout will prepare you for. McGonagall is going to work with you this year to plan for your seventh year based on what you would like to do after school." Remus explained slowly again. "What McGonagall and I would like to know is whether you would like to do both teaching assistant jobs, or just one?"

"How about I just drop out now since I only earned two of my classes, and my other two had to lower their standards out of pity?" Eleanor snipped, ripping a leaf off of a plant she was walking past and ripping it angrily between her fingers. Eleanor had never felt more subpar. She'd never been as smart as Hermione or Draco, she had never been able to keep up with them, but she had always been able to stay a bit above Harry, and from the sound of Sirius' praise, he had more than a single E and O. She knew the year had been hard, but she should have been better than this. Maybe she just wasn't as good as she thought she was. She began kicking at the dirt as she ground her teeth. "What's the point of sticking around if all I'm going to be able to do is...is -"

"You're sounding rather spoiled, my love." Remus cut her off through gritted teeth. Eleanor stopped walking abruptly and stared at her father emotionlessly, trying to wrap her head around what he had said. Remus had never been stern with her, he had gently put in his opinion when he felt necessary, but this scolding tone was something that Eleanor hadn't heard. Spoiled? What did that mean? "I don't mean to sound harsh, I don't, but I believe it would be more beneficial to be grateful for the opportunities you are being granted by understanding professors than to be angry at your lack of OWLs."

Eleanor was silent for a moment, taking in what she said. She supposed she could have been more gracious. She bit her lip in contemplation. "I'm sorry." She let out, knowing her father had struggles in Hogwarts as well and was granted a lot of opportunities despite his future being unsure. "It's hard sometimes being surrounded by the two smartest students in the school, and Harry Potter who is phenomenal, and Ron who everyone loves. Seeing my scores...I don't know, I'm just disappointed in myself. I feel like I'm failing."

"You've had an unfairly difficult year. You lost your parents, your relationships were complicated, your mental health was suffering. No one thinks less of you because you can't take another Potions class. However, I think it is important that you give yourself that same understanding rather than rage about not doing as well as you thought." Remus took a breath. "Some people have no opportunities once they leave Hogwarts. Some people have very limited job options due to circumstances out of their control, so talking about those job options like they are beneath you is very insensitive. Everyone has a part to play, and everyone is valuable."

Eleanor's cheeks went red and her eyes stayed firmly on the ground. She and her father had been raised in very different worlds, and she didn't know how to take herself out of the spoiled life she lived to realize how other people interacted with the world around her. "Can you tell me more about your life?" Eleanor asked softly. "And more about my mum?"

"My life?" Remus said softly. "My life was, well, erm...lonely, then not so for awhile, then lonely again, and now not so much again." Remus smiled sadly. "We can get more into that a bit later," He sucked in a breath, "but your mum I can talk about." He put his arm around his daughter's shoulders. "I could talk about her for ages."

* * *

**It's here!** So, like many others, I've found myself with quite a bit of free time recently. With that time I was able to finish up the little spin-off about Eleanor's mother and Remus! I posted the first chapter a bit ago, but now the whole thing is posted for your enjoyment! Please go check out All the Lonely People! I hope you are all finding ways to stay mentally and physically well during this scary time we are all living in right now. Take care of yourselves!


	32. Chapter 32

**Hey y'all!** I'm sorry for the delay in posting this, I've been reworking the next part of this story in my head and in my notes so my writing has been happening a little slower as I'm mostly back to the storyboard to change up the ending! I hope you all are staying safe and healthy! Let me know what you think, I love hearing from you!

* * *

In the end, Eleanor had decided to take both teaching assistant jobs. With the story of Remus and her mother tucked in her heart, and a few Muggle pictures that Remus was able to scrounge up from their year together, Eleanor packed up and the group of them travelled to King's Cross to begin another year at Hogwarts. They had been able to remove the majority of the Coradarri fortune from Gringotts, though they weren't permitted to take all of it. Eleanor felt better knowing that Voldemort wouldn't be able to get his hands on her, Draco, or any of her assets. And while many questions were left up in the air as to why he wanted them in the first place, Eleanor felt more content knowing that things of importance to her were greatly protected, so she felt confident leaving the Cordarri Castle in the hands of Sirius and Remus as she left for another year at Hogwarts.

Getting to the train station was an event in itself. Sirius was in his dog form, which was a shock to Draco who Eleanor quickly realized she forgot to tell about the Animagus situation. Moody and Tonks accompanied the group to the train station, and they were both very vigilant. Draco stiffened next to Eleanor when all of his Slytherin friends saw him with that crowd.

Eleanor and Draco had spent countless hours talking about what the future held for them this year with the huge shift in living situation and Voldemort's original plan for the two of them being thwarted. Draco was petrified at the thought of what his friends would say when he saw him with Harry Potter and their former professor and a swarm of Aurors. Eleanor and him had decided that it was best to lie and say it was the only way the two of them could get a ride with both of their parents being absent or deceased. And he would tell them that he had been living at Cordarri Castle while his mother was on her grief trip, which wasn't a lie. And, Draco hoped, would earn him some reputation back with people knowing he was doing such reckless and adult things like living with his girlfriend.

He grit his teeth at the thought of all of those conversations coming back, he was an idiot. His friends would see right through him. He wanted desperately to hold Eleanor's hand, but knew that his need for affection would make the situation even worse. "El," He whispered softly, so she would know he needed something.

"I know, Draco." She responded lightly. "I know."

"What's more like me, blowing off my prefect meeting, or going to it?" He asked in a thinly veiled panic. Eleanor grabbed his hand and pulled him away her family to create the distance that Draco had wanted but wasn't sure how to create.

"What do you want to do, Draco?" She asked, leaning against a pillar and looking up at him with their fingers interlocked. She was trying to give him the opportunity to look smooth rather than panicked so that he could save face in front of his friends. Draco understood her motives quickly and leaned into her a bit. Remus eyed them suspiciously but continued talking to Harry about the coming year.

"I don't mean me, I mean what would the Draco they know do?" His entire demeanor radiated swagger and smoothness, like the Draco she'd always known, but his eyes were drowning in worry. He had grown so much, and it had been so hard for him to do even with all of the support from her and her newfound family, but going back to those he had grown up with was a different story.

"Do you still want to be the Draco they knew?" Eleanor questioned softly. Draco seemed to think very deeply about this, he squeezed her hand lightly once more, trying to work through his thoughts and emotions. He had been working so hard on processing them so that he'd be helpful to her and bring relative peace, but he felt it slipping away at the sight of his housemates.

"I don't know, El. I don't want things to be weird and give them more reasons to question me and my family, but I don't want to give your family reasons not to trust me." Draco worried. Eleanor couldn't help but smile at him, knowing that a year ago this would not have been something Draco would be fretting over. "What?" Draco asked in an exasperated tone at Eleanor's soft smile.

"Nothing, it's just…" Eleanor trailed off for a moment, searching for words, playing with his fingers in hers. "Whatever you choose to do today on the train, I'm really proud of you."

"What are you proud of me for?" The anxiety was clear in Draco's eyes. "For being confused?"

"Yes." Eleanor nodded automatically, earning a quizzical look from the man in front of her. "You're confused, you're thinking really hard about the decisions you're making rather than doing what is easy to save face for your friends. I think it's wonderful."

"Well, I'm glad that my turmoil is exciting for you." Draco said in a half-joking, half-annoyed voice.

"You want me to make your decision for you?" Eleanor asked. Draco nodded once, desperate. "Look, I think that if you give up being a Prefect, you'll have a lot less on your plate and you can just focus on your NEWT classes and managing stress. I also think that you love and are very proud of yourself for being a Prefect and will be disappointed if you let this opportunity go."

"That's not a decision." Draco reminded, glancing around and seeing that his friends had dispersed onto the train, and so he let his shoulders sag and puffed out a breath. "I don't even know what I want the opportunities for anymore. I used to want to work in the Ministry like my father, but I don't want to be anything like him anymore." Eleanor watched as Draco worked through his own thoughts silently. "I want to be more like you." Eleanor smiled widely at him.

"Come sit with me on the train." She offered and he nodded, squeezing her hand tightly. They made their way over to the group of Aurors, Remus, and Sirius in his dog form.

"Alright, my love," Remus sighed, grasping his daughter by the shoulders, "stay out of trouble this year, keep your head up, I'll miss you terribly."

"I'll miss you too, Remus." Eleanor replied, smiling sadly at him. "I've grown quite fond of your company." Remus cracked a smile and held his daughter's face in his hand for only a brief moment before bringing his hands down.

"I've grown quite fond of yours. I know we're both counting the days until Christmas holiday." Remus put his hand on Sirius' dog head.

"My favorite time of the year." Eleanor chuckled a little, tears glistening in her eyes. She hadn't realized how much she would miss lazy days with Sirius and Remus. She sucked in a deep breath and put on a brave face.

"Draco, my boy, trust your gut. Don't be…" Remus struggled to find the words.

"A prick?" Draco provided with a slight laugh, causing Remus to crack a smile.

"That would be nice." Remus nodded before shuffling the two towards the train. "And please, don't do anything...stupid, you two." He heaved a sigh. "You know what I mean." Eleanor rolled her eyes and Draco turned slightly pink as they both boarded the train and found an empty compartment.

"How're you feeling?" Eleanor asked softly, putting a gentle hand on Draco's shoulder. He melted under her touch, and not slightly, he visibly dissolved onto the seat next to her. Eleanor took note of his shaking hands and sank into the cushion beside him.

"I'm feeling a lot of things." Draco puffed out, fighting a battle with himself. He had never really shared his emotions before, or even acknowledged them, however he was doing both now and it felt like it was too much. He wanted to just switch it off, but something told him not to.

"Tell me." Eleanor prompted, her eyes never leaving him, her attention always trained right on him. It made him uncomfortable, but at the same time it calmed him.

"Everything is...different." He let out. "I know this year is going to be...what it's going to be. My parents are out of the picture, my ideas about the future are changing, my friends are going to make things complicated…" Draco paused for a moment, "Is this how you felt last year?" He asked her softly.

Eleanor nodded slowly, "Pretty much the same."

"And I was so insensitive?" Draco wondered incredulously, rubbing his forehead at the memories of the year prior.

"You were figuring yourself out." Eleanor reasoned. "You were just being yourself, and that was all you needed to be for me."

"No, you needed more from me." Draco sighed. "I don't want to just be myself in the way I've been. I want to be who you've been saying I am for years. I just don't know how to be that person all the time. It's hard, El."

"But you can do it." Eleanor encouraged. "It's hard to be the person you really are, rather than the person that the world has crafted you to be, but that person is so wonderful, Draco."

"I'm going to mess up." Draco warned.

"I expect you to." Eleanor chuckled, kissing him on the cheek softly. "And I will too."

"I seriously doubt it." Draco mumbled. "But thank you, El."

* * *

Getting settled back into Hogwarts was odd for Harry and Eleanor in particular. Harry had never felt a longing to be away from Hogwarts, but after the summer he'd just had with Sirius and Remus and Eleanor, he felt oddly sad. Eleanor related to him in a similar way. She'd always taken a bit to get used to Hogwarts because she missed her parents greatly, but that was a feeling she'd never expected to have again. However, she was feeling it now. They had been back at Hogwarts for three days and both Harry and Eleanor were still a bit mopey. Ron and Hermione were on their rounds as Prefects and so the two had a bit of alone time in the Common Room. Eleanor was working on prepping worksheets for a First Year Herbology class and Harry was planning out Quidditch try-out drills.

"Why aren't you with Malfoy?" Harry asked suddenly.

"He and Blaise were going to study in the library for a bit." Eleanor responded quietly. "Thank you for being so understanding this summer, with him and everything."

"Well I didn't think anything I could say would stop it." Harry shrugged nonchalantly. Eleanor chuckled a little and shook her head.

"What about you, Chosen One? Anyone you want to make bad decisions with?" Eleanor joked. "I can't wait to tell Padfoot and Moony all about it so they can embarrass the ever living hell out of you by telling you not to have sex every other minute." They had taken to calling their guardians by their pen names when at Hogwarts to avoid anyone over hearing, and each time they were used, Harry would smile slightly. Eleanor expected it made him feel closer to his father.

"I dunno." Harry let out. "Kind of stressed out about Voldemort, not easy to be attracted to someone when humanity is in danger."

"I wish Marietta isn't the way that she is, she's cute."

"Yeah," Harry responded, uninterested. "Not really my type anyway."

"Oh, interesting." Eleanor hummed. "Who is more your type?"

"Why are we talking about this?" Harry asked, putting his quill down and staring hard at Eleanor.

"I don't know, Harry. I'm your friend, I want to set you up."

"You want all of the pressure to be taken off of you and Malfoy." Harry returned with a slight laugh.

"I'm keeping my eye out, Harry Potter. Just you wait."

"I really don't need someone who is like my sister setting me up with people." Harry laughed to himself before turning bright red and his eyes snapping up to meet Eleanors. "I mean, uh-"

"Harry, do you think of me as a sister?" Eleanor asked, a smile breaking on her face.

"I mean, kind of, but...is that okay?" Harry asked shyly.

"Of course it is." Eleanor nodded. "I've never had any siblings, the closest I've had to growing up with someone is Draco and-"

"Eleanor, no. Please stop." Harry waved her off, both of them dissolving into fits of laughter.

* * *

"Draco, can you put the book down for even a moment?" Eleanor fretted as the two studied in an empty classroom one evening. "I've barely seen you the past few days. I know we're studying, but I thought we could at least talk a little."

"Sorry love, I'm just doing research for the-"

"Ministry internship." Eleanor finished for him with a good natured roll of the eyes. "Which you can't even fully participate in until your seventh year."

"It doesn't hurt to be prepared." Draco replied, but closed one of the three books he had borrowed from the library and slid into the spot directly next to Eleanor. "And I would need to do a trial run at the Ministry this summer, and have my application and references turned in by Easter. And it's going to have to be really, really good considering my father is in Azkaban." He flinched at his own words and shook his head softly in an attempt to free himself of thoughts of his father.

"Draco, I think what you are doing is extremely admirable, but it isn't your job to redeem your family name. Do something you want to do, because you want to do it." Eleanor urged softly.

"I want to do this, El," Draco assured, "and I want to redeem my family name. So it's a win all around." Eleanor rolled her eyes a little at him.

"I just want you to be happy." Eleanor sighed, returning to her homework.

"Hey, hey," Draco placed his hand over hers on the table to bring her eyes back to his. "I will be happy. You make me happy, and I plan on keeping you around for a long time."

Eleanor laughed slightly at his cheesiness but couldn't help but smile at it. "What would your friends say if they saw you being so soft, huh?"

Eleanor took note of the stiffness that came into Draco's shoulders at the mention of his friends. Eleanor worried constantly that he was lonely and not supported by those who had been by him throughout childhood. He didn't talk about them much anymore and she wanted answers. "I think something's going on with Blaise." Draco let out quietly.

"What do you mean?" Eleanor's eyes narrowed in confusion.

"He's different, more on edge. He's never been so jumpy, but, I don't know." Draco shook his head, as if trying to shake the thoughts he was having. "Maybe I'm paranoid. Maybe he just doesn't like being around me anymore."

"Blaise wouldn't think like that." Eleanor interjected, though she had to admit she wasn't quite sure whether or not he would. She knew Blaise well enough growing up, but the two were never particularly close. And while he was the kindest of Draco's friends, Eleanor wasn't sure if that bar was set very high.

"That's what I thought too." Draco confirmed. "All of this stuff with You-Know-Who being back, and knowing what we know about my parents, I don't know, I'm just more vigilant than normal."

"You really think Blaise is a Death Eater?" Eleanor asked.

Draco ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know, El, I don't know why he would need to be, or what they could possibly be holding over his head."

"Would they need to hold anything over his head?"

Draco paused, realization washing over his face. "I mean, I didn't think he would just join willingly, but I haven't spent much time with him recently with everything going on. Maybe I just don't know him as well as I thought I did."

"Hey," Eleanor tried to calm his train of thought, "let's not get too ahead of ourselves. Maybe he's just stressed with school, or maybe something is up with his family. This is a scary time for everyone. You could just talk to him." She suggested. "He's your best friend, he'll probably want to talk to you."

* * *

Eleanor had always been able to talk about her problems with her friends. She always suggested taking the heartfelt, emotional approach. Draco preferred not to speak about much of anything, ever. However, his new perspective on life was following the mantra of "what would El do?" (Though he was rather mum on this as Eleanor would most definitely hold that over his head pridefully.)

So, with that in the back of his mind, he approached Blaise, who was sitting by the fireplace in the Slytherin common room, bouncing his leg nervously and tearing through an unfamiliar book. Draco tried to read what the title was, but couldn't get a good look.

"Everything okay?" Draco asked quietly, taking a seat next to his friend. Blaise looked up from his book and narrowed his eyes at Draco. Over the summer, talk had been extremely scarce. Especially with everything that Draco was going through, getting drunk with Blaise hadn't been a huge priority. However, looking at him now, with large, dark circles under his eyes, and sunken in cheeks, Draco thought that maybe he should have paid more attention to his friend.

"Fine." Blaise snapped. Draco's lip curled slightly in response to the tone he'd received, but tried to think about what Eleanor would do in this situation, and took a deep breath.

"What class is that for?" Draco pressed, leaning in to get a closer look at the book in Blaise's hands. "_The Art of Ancient Transportation." _He read.

"Extra credit essay, for History of Magic." Blaise returned quickly, his leg was bouncing wildy and his hands were shaking around the cover.

"What's going on with you?" Draco reached to take the book out of his hands. Blaise smacked his hand away quickly and aggressively. Draco lit up in fury until he saw, just barely visible under Blaise's ajar sleeve, the dreaded skull and snake on his forearm. "Blaise." Draco breathed out, recoiling slightly at the sight of it.

For a split second, and only barely there, tears filled Blaise's eyes. He tugged his sleeve down hard and slammed the book shut.

"Draco," He murmured desperately, his eyes wide and body shaking, "help me."


	33. Chapter 33

**Hi friends! **I so appreciate your support of my story, sometimes it is hard to find/make time for something like this in the midst of school, work, and a pandemic but when I receive so much love from you all it really does fuel my writing fire and I appreciate it so much! Every favorite, follow, and review really leave my heart feeling so full, so thank you for engaging so much with me and my work! I also want to let you all know that I'm trying to keep updates as consistent as possible, but I've nearly caught up to where I've written so far because I've taken so much time off from writing to completely re-imagine, re-storyboard, and rewrite the ending (which we are nowhere near, by the way.) So, if you notice that it has been a little longer than usual since I updated, don't worry, I'm just taking a bit longer than usual! Thank you so much, and please let me know what you think!

* * *

Draco did not know what to do. He had spent the better part of the week following his conversation with Blaise analyzing every possible course of action. Blaise had revealed to him that his parents had coerced him into joining the Death Eaters, as You-Know-Who needed someone inside Hogwarts. Blaise was rather mum on what he was asked to do, only that it was important that he understood how a Vanishing Cabinet worked.

Draco's first instinct was to tell Eleanor, but something stopped him; that something terrorized him all hours of the day and night. He couldn't tell her because there was a part of him that genuinely wanted to help Blaise. Besides Eleanor, Blaise was his oldest and closest friend. Blaise had done a lot for Draco in the past, and Draco was nothing if not loyal and true to his friends. He had just spent the entire summer trying to get away from You-Know-Who's clutches, and here he was, seriously contemplating being an assistant to a Death Eater.

If he told Eleanor, he knew what she would say. He thought that if he helped Blaise a little, then Blaise would be safer, and Draco would still keep his hands clean. All he had to do was help Blaise figure out the Vanishing Cabinet, and whatever Blaise did with that information wasn't Draco's business.

But Draco kept coming back to Eleanor, not only how disappointed she would be if she found out what he'd done, but about her safety. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was after her, and if Blaise's mission led to harm on Eleanor, then Draco couldn't do it.

He was fretting over it constantly. To the point that after the week had passed, he looked very much like Blaise had. Sunken, sallow, worried, ill. He hadn't intentionally avoided Eleanor during that week, but perhaps it was in his subconscious. He knew that when she laid eyes on him, she would know there was something wrong. She knew him too well.

Eleanor hadn't noticed anything a miss at all, she was delighted at how busy she turned out to be that term. Helping Hagrid and Professor Sprout ended up being a lot of hard, energizing work, and she found herself a bit lost in it. However, on Saturday morning, Eleanor looked across the Great Hall to see Draco looking exceptionally pale and worried. Eleanor never crossed the table lines, she knew it would make a scene if she did, even if everyone knew about her and Draco. She also never had a particular want to go sit with the Slytherins, but in that moment she knew she had to go.

Hermione looked at her quizzically when she pushed her plate from her and marched over to where Draco sat, alone.

"El," He breathed out in surprise when she sat next to him, "what are you doing over here?"

"You look sick, are you sick?" Eleanor questioned softly, careful not to jeopardize any reputation he had with his housemates.

"Sick? No, I just have had a stressful week." Draco replied, careful not to lie, but not to divulge the whole truth.

"What's stressful?" Eleanor asked. "I'm sorry I've been so busy this week, I should have tried to sit down with you." She began worrying over him. She knew this year was not going to be easy on Draco, just as last year had not been easy on her. She knew their downfall last year had been a lack of communication and time together, and she was already falling back into that habit.

"No, no." Draco shook his head. "It isn't you. Just-" He was going to lie, he had to, he was going to say it was his classes, but just briefly his eyes shot over to Blaise who sat further down the table. The glance was less than a second long, and it was subtle but Eleanor was able to follow his eye line.

"Did you talk to him?" Eleanor pressed, searching Draco's face, knowing something wasn't right with him.

"Yeah, I...well, kind of. I don't know-" He stammered, and hung his head. He didn't know what he should tell her, he didn't know what to do, he didn't know anything.

"Hey," Eleanor gently whispered, putting her hand over his lightly, "I'm here. I'm not leaving. We can figure it out. Together, right?"

Draco smiled softly, feeling slightly warmer and calmer than he had the whole week of fretting on his own. He realized that throughout all of his confusion, with all he didn't know, he did know one thing; he knew he loved Eleanor with all of his heart. "You're with me?" He asked softly.

"Always." Eleanor assured. With this assurance he took her hand in his and led her out of the Great Hall so they could continue talking in private without the fear that everyone was going to listen in. The pair walked down to the tree by the lake where they had spent many moments studying and talking as friends the previous Spring. It was still warm enough to allow them to be outside amongst the elements, but not so warm as to attract a crowd.

"Blaise is one of them." Draco let out in defeat, kicking the dirt in frustration and sticking his hands in his pockets. He couldn't look at Eleanor, not with what he was about to say. "He told me a week ago. He asked for help. I should have told you right away, I just…" He trailed off, unsure of how to continue.

"You want to help him." Eleanor answered simply. Draco's eyes shot up to meet hers. She wasn't angry, or hurt, or frightened. She looked at him with complete understanding. Draco felt his heart melt a little. He took her in, every inch his true partner, his refuge.

"You're not angry?" Draco questioned.

"Of course I'm not angry." Eleanor replied. "He's your best friend. He's in trouble. You want to help."

"He didn't ask for my help getting out of trouble, El," Draco began to explain, afraid she misunderstood, "he needs my help for a mission."

"I figured that's what you meant." Eleanor nodded, not lighthearted on the matter, but not angry either. She seemed to puzzle for a bit. "I'm afraid that Voldemort knows how close you two are and is using your friendship to get to us."

"I'd thought about that as well." Draco agreed. "I can't help him, but I can't let him die if he messes up."

"What does he need you to do?" Eleanor asked.

"He needs me to help him figure out more about a Vanishing Cabinet. It's important that he gets one to work."

"Okay, here's what I say we do," Eleanor started, working over the information in her mind. "Let's find out more about Vanishing Cabinets, their history, all of their uses, how they work. Maybe if we figure it out without telling Blaise, we can be a step ahead, figure out why Voldemort wants that and then plan from there."

Draco took a deep breath. It wasn't exactly what he wanted, it still wasn't helping Blaise, but he understood her logic. He gave into the plan with a slow nod. "Thank you, Ellie." He reached out and grabbed her hand softly. "You know I love you, right? I couldn't do any of this without you."

"You won't have to. I'll be right here." Eleanor assured. She took a step towards him and wrapped her arms around his waist. His long arms held her close to him as he rested his chin on the top of her head.

"You're everything to me, now. I've always been looking to protect my family and my future, those are both you now." He whispered softly, kissing her hair. He meant every word. His father was imprisoned, his mother was in hiding, his name was tarnished on both sides of the war. Everything he had held dear, and everything he was taught to hold in high esteem was ruined in one way or another. But Eleanor, she was kept clean. She was the lighthouse in the night for him. She was his family, she was there helping him unconditionally, she was there to love him and encourage him. And he hoped she always would be. The world swirled around them, everything terrifying, confusing, and cruel. She was his peace. He'd fought for this peace, and he was going to hold onto it, hold onto her.

"Oh Draco," Eleanor sighed, "The world can't seem to give us a rest, can it?"

* * *

"Eleanor, those Gnome Violets are looking particularly lovely today." Professor Sprout commented as Eleanor tended to some flowers in the greenhouse. She spent a lot of her spare time amongst the plants, or with Hagrid and his many creatures. Her class schedule was so light that she had a lot of extra prep time for her teaching assistant jobs, which she was growing more and more grateful for every day. "I've never been able to get them that deep a shade of purple."

"They like to be closer together." Eleanor pointed out, showing how the pots were pressed up against each other and she had overcrowded them a bit. "I figured it out a bit by accident, I didn't have an extra pot for new seedling, so I put the two smallest in the same pot and they grew so quickly. I did a bit of research and found that they grow more together because they hide gnomes, hence their name, and-" She cut her rambling off when she saw Professor Sprout chuckling. "Sorry," Eleanor blushed slightly. She never let her passion for plants out in front of her friends, who cared very little for it and grew tired of her Herbology musings.

"No, no. I appreciate it. I'm just thinking how very much like me you are." Professor Sprout assured. "Your enthusiasm is making all of our friends sprout at twice the pace!" She giggled as she gestured to the life teeming around them. "To think a year ago you were making them wilt." She continued about her work. Eleanor recalled the darkness she had been in and how painful it had been to be in that place. "I'm so grateful to see you grow, just like everything else in here." Professor Sprout continued.

"I'm grateful to be growing as well." Eleanor responded, beginning to mist some other plants lightly. She liked how busy she had been because of the jobs she was doing, she liked keeping things alive and watching them grow and thrive.

"I know that the world has not always been kind to you, Miss Cordarri, and I know that the future is a bit of a question mark for you right now, but I have to tell you that I have seen you change, and grow, and adapt, and become stronger. Anywhere you end up will be lucky to have you."

Eleanor blushed under the praise. "I appreciate that very much." Last year she had been reprimanded for her poor work and lack of dedication by every teacher at Hogwarts. She was always falling behind, and she couldn't keep up. She could barely keep herself from crawling into bed early each day. Life wasn't without it's challenges, but Professor Sprout was right, she had grown. "Where do you think would be a good fit for me?" Eleanor asked, hissing slightly as she cut her skin on a thorn of a plant and brought the wound on her hand to her mouth swiftly.

"You know what I would love to see?" Professor Sprout sighed. "Community gardens, sustainable farms for wand and broomstick materials, a sanctuary for endangered plants and creatures, children having a place to learn about the importance of ecology before coming to me at 11 bloody years old and have already made up their minds that the environment is boring." She shook her head as she realized she was ranting. "There's a few ideas for you. Run with them."

Eleanor took those ideas and thought them over as she continued to tend to the plants in silence. "How would I go about doing any of those things?"

"Money." Professor Sprout stated bluntly. "Which is why they've never been done. You need research, well laid out plans, community members on board with helping, then money from a bunch of rich old men who will then want to decide how you run it."

"Like philanthropy groups?" Eleanor asked, eliciting a snort from her professor.

"Sure, that's what they call themselves. Really they just throw money at things, or people, they like. We don't need another bloody monument in the Ministry of Magic, or more clubs to honor our Magical History. We need action for the future, but no one wants to spend money on that." Professor Sprout huffed about. Eleanor loved working in close proximity to Professor Sprout. She was an outspoken, wonderfully funny woman. She reminded Eleanor a lot of her mother, and she felt like she was learning more and more every time she was around her.

"I could probably fund some things myself, though. If I had plans. Couldn't I?" Eleanor wondered. Professor Sprout stopped for a moment and pondered the question.

"Ah, Cordarri." She seemed to remember, then her eyes grew bright. "Yes, you could! Oh, Eleanor, you could fund such amazing projects. Forget those stuffy old men, you can do things all on your own!" Eleanor chuckled at Professor Sprout and kept doing her work. "Oh, my dear, you do make me so proud."

"Me?" Eleanor clarified, as Professor Sprout had a tendency to say similar things to her plants.

"Yes, you." Professor Sprout laughed. "I remember when you first came in here when you were a first year and told me all about your experiences gardening with your mum."

"She was quite the gardener." Eleanor smiled affectionately, her heart squeezing at the memory of her mother.

"You were just so excited to show me everything you knew. It reminded me so much of your mother when she first came to Hogwarts. I swear the plants grew just by being around her." Professor Sprout smiled at the memory.

"My mother loved your class, too?"

"Oh, yes." Professor Sprout laughed. "Your father hated it. It seemed like all of the plants rebelled against him. When the OWLs came, he couldn't drop my class fast enough. But your mother," Professor Sprout sighed happily here, "your mother just had life flowing from her. She would sneak in here between classes and just fix up anyone's plants for projects that were dying. She couldn't stand to let them rot. Her classmates loved her for it, of course. She rebelled against what people thought of her in the softest of ways."

"She rebelled?" Eleanor asked, loving hearing the stories of her mother. She had never thought to ask professors about her parents, but many of them had taught her mother and father. They knew things about her ancestry that Eleanor was excited to still learn.

"That girl was a handful." Professor Sprout tsked. "Oh my, she would just push the boundaries always. But she had a way of doing it that was so sweet and innocent that all of us just passed it off as her disposition. She always had a smart remark, but it was never disrespectful. She was careful, and quiet, and she always stuck up for the little guy. I was always disappointed she wasn't a Hufflepuff. But I suppose Slytherins look out for their own with ferocity, and she considered everyone her word, you remind me so much of her."

Eleanor couldn't say a word. She just basked in the retelling of stories of her mother. She knew her mother had been widely liked, but it was refreshing to hear how similar the two of them were. Eleanor knew her mother's blood didn't run through her veins, but it was calming to know that she was still about to be a legacy for the Cordarri family, that she was still doing them proud.


	34. Chapter 34

**Hello there! **Stay safe out there, friends! Hope you're enjoying this so far, let me know what you think!

* * *

_September 30th_

_Dearest Eleanor, _

_I miss you quite terribly. I've been enjoying staying in your home, there are photos of you covering this place. Though a poor replacement for you, it is comforting to get glimpses of your smile everywhere I turn. _

_Padfoot has been over the moon to have so much room to roam. He is so in love with the lake that I fear he might get himself sick by continuing to swim even when the weather turns. _

_I know you were very concerned for the garden before you left, but Padfoot and I have been following your instructions to the letter. All of the plants are doing just fine, albeit I've noticed their spirits seem to be slightly down since you've left - do plants do that? I've never known them to respond to their caretakers so much, however I've never had much of a green thumb myself. _

_Tonks found the length of your instructions quite amusing. She's taken to calling it the New Herbology Encyclopedia. She's very much looking forward to Christmas holiday to get to know you better. She regrets that things were rather stressful this summer and she was unable to spend time with you that wasn't related to your circumstances. She reminds me a lot of you, and her and Padfoot keep me laughing in your absence. _

_I'm very interested to hear about your teaching positions. Minerva reached out to be not too long ago to tell me how proud she was of the progress you've been making, and how pleased both Hagrid and Sprout have been with your work. I wonder if this brings on any ideas for the future? _

_I do hope that Draco is continuing to mind his manners and keeping all of his toes in line, though I suspect you would whip him back into shape if he wasn't. That boy impressed me this summer, though he didn't entirely win me over (he needs to be kept on his toes, and also I'm not sure a father can ever be entirely won over anyhow.) Be sure to stay focused on your studies and your friends, and he will fit into your life if he is meant to. _

_Padfoot is making fun of me for how long this letter is. Him and Harry write such short letters, I wonder how they tell each other anything. Though I suppose this is getting a bit lengthy. _

_I look forward to hearing from you, my love. I know Christmas is far, but I'm already counting down the days until all of you kids are loudly bringing joy back into our home. _

_All my love, _

_Remus_

* * *

_October 2nd, _

_Dear Eleanor, _

_Remus has been bugging me to write to you, but I don't think there is much I can say to you that he hasn't. I don't know how you managed to keep that entire garden alive. It's too much bloody work. The weather is starting to change, so I'm hoping the plants go into hibernation soon so I don't have to panic about killing you and your mother's life work. I've heard that you are doing rather well in your teaching assistant positions. I never doubted you for a minute. _

_Also, an interesting development. I believe Tonks is very sweet on your father. I also believe your father might be sweet on her, but he doesn't seem to be admitting it. Once your God forsaken garden finally goes to sleep, I'll have to work on the two of them. _

_Looking forward to Christmas, _

_Padfoot_

* * *

_October 7th_

_Dear Remus, _

_I'm glad that the Castle is occupied full time now. And I'm happy to hear that it is bringing you and Padfoot such enjoyment. I hope you've been exploring the library. There are so many things to read in there, you can truly never be bored. _

_Hopefully the garden will need less tending throughout the winter. My mother and I always used to spend my entire Easter break turning soil, pruning branches, and pulling weeds. Hopefully this year, with so many of us, it will be quick work. It's my favorite way to kick summer off and get the garden looking beautiful. _

_I'm glad that Tonks finds my antics so amusing. Have you two been spending much time together? She seems wonderful, and hopefully all of this Voldemort business will be finished up soon so that her and I can interact properly. (Harry just read this over my shoulder and snorted, I suppose that is extremely wishful thinking on my part.) _

_My teaching assistant positions have been going very well. I've spent a lot of my free time prepping for classes, and tending to the plants and animals. Professor Sprout is going to have me teach some next term. Hagrid is a bit more reluctant to let me teach, he doesn't plan as thoroughly as Professor Sprout does. I've actually gotten a lot of ideas about the future since being back. There are a lot of projects to be done for the greater good, so I'll need to do a bit of research and make some plans, but I think my future lies with environmental and sustainability work. Professor Sprout has been talking a lot about a need for more education in herbology pre-Hogwarts, which is something I might be interested in. I'll have to see. _

_My other classes have been going well. I'm happy to report that I am back to being a perfectly average student. Flitwick and McGonagall both said that I caught up on what I missed last year, and am now back on target. Which is good, because we start Apparating classes soon, and I'll be damned if I can't pop to and from as I please. _

_Draco is doing well. His relationships with his housemates are a bit rocky, which has been hard for him, but he is still fighting tooth and nail to dethrone Hermione as top of the class. He's been doing a damn good job of it too. I'm in the special position of having insider information about both of their grades, and I have to be honest, it's neck and neck with them. _

_I'm looking forward to Christmas and being able to spend time with everyone. I miss you terribly. _

_Love always, _

_Eleanor_

* * *

_October 7th, _

_Dear Padfoot, _

_I'm sorry that my garden is such a nuisance to you. I appreciate your efforts in not killing it off. They should be starting to go to sleep for the cold months now, and with all the rain, it won't be necessary to water them. You'll soon be relieved by Mother Nature. _

_This development between Remus and Tonks is quite interesting. I wouldn't have put them together, however I don't necessarily disagree with it. Do you know if Tonks is much like my mother was? That would be interesting to know. Keep me updated, and push him to take her on a date or something. _

_Miss you lots, _

_Eleanor_

* * *

Draco watched pointedly as Eleanor wrote her letters. Her Saturdays were usually reserved for replying to Remus and Sirius. Writing to them consistently brought Eleanor a lot of joy, it reminded her of the support she had waiting for her at home. Draco seemed on edge as she wrote them, knowing that he was slacking in the letter writing department.

"You can get the post office box, Draco." Eleanor said simply without looking at him. "I don't understand why you don't write to her. I'm sure she'll want to hear from you."

"What am I supposed to say?" Draco fretted, rubbing his forehead. There truly was no keeping anything from Eleanor. She knew him too well.

"Tell her that you're safe, that you love her. She just wants a way to write to you." Eleanor answered softly, putting her hand on his hand.

"I'm scared. What if I screw it up? What if they are able to track my letters? What if they get to her and I led them? I know Hogwarts isn't exactly Death Eater free, who knows who could be watching me." Draco looked pale as he continued to worry.

"You're paranoid." Eleanor tried to be soothing, she knew his fears were valid, but he was spending entirely too much time dwelling on them. Far too much time to be healthy.

"You're not?" Draco cried out incredulously, then immediately quieted down. The two of them were in the Great Hall, though it was currently devoid of students. Eleanor was hoping that being in there long passed the breakfast rush would convince Draco to eat. He hadn't been doing much of that lately.

"What if we asked Hermione to send the letters for you. She goes in there rather frequently to mail things to her parents, it wouldn't be odd if she slipped a letter to her aunt in Malibu in the outgoing post." Eleanor suggested. Draco seemed to take the idea and think it over for a while.

"My mother would immediately burn a letter from Granger." He decided.

"If it were your handwriting, I don't think she would." Eleanor reasoned. Draco's shoulders sagged slightly, knowing Eleanor was right.

"I don't want to ask Granger for help." Draco admitted softly. Eleanor tried very hard not to show any emotion on her face when he told her that. She felt a lot of things. She was amused at his embarrassment to admit any sign of weakness in front of her friend, and knew this knowledge would make Hermione feel slightly powerful. She was annoyed at his pride, and how he still let it get in the way of things, but she was happy that he was admitting that he was too proud to let some things go.

"Can I be honest with you?" Eleanor asked carefully, unsure if Draco wanted help, or to be coddled in that moment.

"I know what you are going to say, but sure." Draco puffed out.

"I think admitting you need help will go a lot further than you think in the 'acceptance from Hermione' department." Draco rolled his eyes then rubbed his face. Eleanor had to admit that he looked like he was struggling greatly. Eleanor's heart ached looking at him. She knew she was in similar shape the year before, and she thought of what she would have needed from Draco had they been talking. Eleanor shoved her letters into her bag and slung it over her shoulder before standing up and holding her hand out to Draco. "Come on."

"Where are we going?" Draco asked.

"Draco, I love you, and today we are just going to be Draco and Eleanor. I have a few rules, though." Draco nodded slowly in acceptance. "Okay, we cannot talk about Blaise, Voldemort, my friends, or your mother. We aren't allowed to do any homework. And you have to eat something, Draco." Eleanor listed off. "Do you agree to my terms?"

"Do I have a choice?" Draco countered with a light smirk.

Eleanor laughed and shook her head. "I'm afraid not." Draco took her hand and stood from the table. Eleanor first took Draco to the large painting that covered the entrance to the kitchens.

"What is this place?" Draco wondered. Eleanor didn't answer, and instead tickled the pear, revealing the bustling madness of the Hogwarts House Elves prepping food. Draco's eyes grew wide at the sight of them.

"Miss Eleanor," a small voice squeaked from below, "Mr. Draco."

"Dobby?" Draco asked incredulously with a laugh. "I always wondered what happened to you."

"I work here, in the kitchens." Dobby answered. Eleanor smiled at the house elf. When Harry told her of his encounters with Dobby after their second year, Eleanor was excited by the idea that Harry had not only interacted with a most beloved friend from her childhood, but that he was now free of the Malfoys. Eleanor had always been fond of the house elves that the Malfoys employed, but never of the fact they employed them. It felt wrong to her that house elves worked tirelessly for their families and were never compensated fairly. "And I get days off, and a fair wage."

"I didn't know they could do that." Draco was looking at Eleanor now, who still had her eyes fixed on Dobby.

"Don't you think they deserve it?" She returned. Draco stammered for a moment, unsure of how to answer, unsure of what he thought. He had always believed house elves liked working for people, but he also supposed that he never actually sat down to ask one.

"Sure, but do they want it?" Draco finally asked.

"Oh no," Eleanor chuckled off handedly, "most don't. Dobby is the exception. But I think it is important that the option is there for them. They should be free to choose if they want to work. Shouldn't everyone be free to choose?"

"Of course," Draco said as a house elf handed Eleanor a large picnic basket. She rummaged through her pockets of her jacket and pulled out a small jingle bell and handed it to Dobby.

"I don't have any hats for you today, Dobby, but I do have this." Eleanor smiled at the little elf.

"Oh, thank you Miss Eleanor." He jingled it excitedly before disappearing into the kitchens.

"I had no idea that this is how everything is run." Draco looked around with wide eyes as the pair took the food and left. The weather was starting to turn cold and while Eleanor liked to feel the crisp air when she was feeling anxious, she knew that Draco preferred warmth for comfort.

"There might be a few things about this castle that you had no idea about." Eleanor smiled, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the Room of Requirement. Eleanor had told him of its existence after Dumbledore's Army the previous year, however Draco had yet to see the room that could be whatever he needed.

With each step, Draco fell more in love with Eleanor. She was everything he needed. Fierce, and kind, and smart, and funny. She was a force of love and light, and he was enchanted. In a way, he always had been.

Upon entering the Room of Requirement the couple saw the walls covered in dark hanging tapestries, plush rugs under their feet, and fluffy chairs, couches and blankets in every corner with a fire blazing. The room was warm and cave-like. Draco felt immediately at ease. It all felt too perfect. Despite the world falling to pieces around him, his best friend being untrustworthy, his mother being in hiding, his father imprisoned, the Dark Lord hunting down him and Eleanor to force them to marry and do unspeakable things to Eleanor's family; yes despite all of this, he felt safe. He was warm, he was loved, and he was in love. Nothing weighed on him, he felt accepted and at peace.

"Ellie," Draco croaked out quietly while she set up their food on, she didn't look at him.

"Hmm?" She inquired in a hum.

"Can anyone come in here while we're in here?" Draco asked.

"Well apparently Umbridge blasted the wall down last year to bust Dumbledore's Army, but neither of us were there to actually witness that. But I don't think so. Why?" She hadn't looked up to look at him yet, so she didn't see how nervous he was to say what he was about to say next. He took a deep breath and tried to be smooth but he faltered a bit.

"I think you know why." His voice was dark and sultry and he sauntered over to her.

"What, are you going to kill me?" She joked, sparing a glance up at him, unsure of what got into him, and not picking up on his innuendo.

"What, Ellie, no." Draco shook his head. "No, I just want to make sure this place is completely private for us." He put his hand on her back. "Just you and I."

"Oh, yeah. We shouldn't be disturbed in here. Eat up." She smiled, looking at all of the snack foods that were on the table in front of them. She wasn't getting it.

"I'm only hungry for one thing." Draco started again lowly. Eleanor gave him a sidelong glance, suspicious at his tone.

"Me?" Eleanor asked, confused. "You want to eat me?" His joke delivery wasn't what it normally was.

"El, I'm trying to be smooth, please don't take everything so literally." Draco rested his forehead on her shoulder as she chuckled at her own inability to see his meaning.

"Oh, babe, I'm so sorry." She laughed. "You were doing well." She picked his head off of her shoulder and brought his lips to her softly.

"El, I don't want to stop today. I'm ready if you are." Draco puffed out truthfully, all of his suave nature was gone.

Eleanor could barely say anything, just let out a quiet breath and nodded once.


	35. Chapter 35

Eleanor and Draco had done the deed. It was awkward and fumbling despite their history of being more intimate than most. They were still young teenagers, very much in love and very much concerned with being enough for the other. But it was perfect. Not _perfect_, but perfect for them. Eleanor thought about her birth mother and Remus, and how they had found each other and were immediately having sex all of the time before falling in love (Remus did not tell her that in so many words, however Sirius compared them to various woodland creatures when his friend wasn't around.)

Eleanor loved the story of Nora and Remus, a whirlwind romance where her mother threw caution to the wind, told it like it was, and didn't care what anyone thought. But that wasn't Eleanor. Eleanor liked to take her time. And while she acknowledged that she could use a bit of her birth mother's boldness in other areas of her life, her little peace with Draco was exactly what she had wanted.

But the two of them still had to face reality eventually. Blaise was still a Death Eater, Draco's family was still what it was, he still had school to deal with and Quidditch to practice for. The world still felt overwhelming, but Eleanor didn't. She felt like coming home.

The two fell into their new normal pattern as the year progressed. They tried to spend as much time together as possible. Draco was immersed in studying, and would follow Eleanor around with his books in tow so he could sit with her wherever she went. He attempted to retain his friendships with fellow Slytherins, but he felt less connected with them now. His power had been taken away with his father imprisoned and his mother fled. His loyalties had shifted over the summer, and so his friendships began to shift also.

The only housemate that he felt connected to anymore was Blaise, and that was because Blaise began clinging to him out of desperation and fear for his life. Eleanor and Draco spent any spare moment they could learning about Vanishing Cabinets and their history. Both of them figured that he was trying to get Death Eaters into the castle, but they didn't know when or why. They didn't know what to do with their theory, and Eleanor knew better than to tell Harry her thoughts. Draco was already feeling so alone, she didn't want her friends turning on him for fear of disloyalty.

The pair were careful not to completely isolate themselves, but they found more peace with each other than with anyone else.

One particular October afternoon, Eleanor was tending to the Hippogriffs before Hagrid's lesson. Draco was sitting a healthy distance away, his quill moving slowly across a piece of parchment.

"What a long way you've come from trying to get these animals banned, to spending your afternoon with them." Eleanor called jokingly over to a preoccupied Draco.

"Don't remind them of it, I'm afraid they'll turn on me any second." Draco chuckled without looking up. "I don't understand how everyone was so excited about Potter's ride when you are basically a Hippogriff whisperer."

"I didn't realize my Hippogriff whispering skills until after Harry had ridden Buckbeak. You weren't there, you'd already caused an unnecessary scene by that point." Eleanor rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on, El, I was 13 and jealous."

"And now you're 16 and what?" Eleanor raised a brow and began walking towards him.

"In love. And hopefully better at showing it than when I was 13." Draco smiled up at her as she approached the tree he was sitting against.

"You're terribly cheesy." Eleanor tsked with a laugh.

"Only when we're alone, love."

"What are you working on over here?" She asked, gazing at the parchment that didn't look anything like homework.

"It's actually a letter to my mum. I was hoping you'd come with me to ask Granger to help me send it when I'm finished."

Draco was always surprising Eleanor. After their discovery about Blaise, Eleanor had braced herself for the worst. She had been prepared to drag him out of the dark place, but it seemed that every day Draco was growing more and more. She felt really solid with him. "I'm sure Hermione would be happy to help."

* * *

Eleanor fidgeted on the bench outside of McGonagall's office. She was anxious for their meeting to discuss her progress in her teaching assistant positions, eager for a chance to prove herself. To avoid chewing her thumbnail in anticipation Eleanor played with the tattered cover of a leather-bound journal that her parents had gotten her years before. It was intended to be a place to write out her anxieties, but Eleanor had never been the journaling type no matter how hard she tried, and the journal had been abandoned for years. She had recently found it at the bottom of her trunk, slightly worn but all of the pages still fresh. She had brainstormed idea after idea of projects she could do around Hogwarts to build a portfolio for herself once she graduated. Her hope was that McGonagall would approve some of them so she could put her busy, anxious energy to work.

"Miss Cordarri," McGonagall greeted, opening her office door for Eleanor to enter, "please come in. I'm interested to hear about your progress this term."

"First of all, thank you for the assistant teaching positions, they have helped so much with getting me back on track." Eleanor immediately began gushing in gratitude.

"You earned them." Her professor smiled.

"I didn't, you were very gracious to offer them to me and I am so appreciative." Eleanor sucked in a deep breath and laid her notebook on the desk between them. "I've been talking with Professor Sprout about how I can make an impact using my passions. I'm not sure if the traditional career paths are really for me. I decided, instead, to come up with a list of things that need to get done, and then come up with solutions for them. I thought maybe I could try to start implementing them and building a portfolio." Eleanor began to spill out as she opened her notebook to a page filled with drawings and notes. "An example would be a community garden where we can all work together to grow our own fruits and vegetables. Professor Sprout had even mentioned that it could be used as extra credit for Herbology, and I think it really fosters a sense of community when we all build something together. Also, if we built it in a nice way, it could also be a new study spot outdoors, which I think is really relieving rather than being inside. Another idea I had was a lake clean up project. I was doing some research and there is a new invasive species of algae in the lake, and I thought it might be nice to organize a committee and have a lake cleaning event. Maybe meet for a few weeks beforehand and start building the nets together." Eleanor had rambled for a long time and decided then to look at McGonagall to gauge her reaction.

"These are very ambitious." McGonagall noted, sliding the pictures closer to her and inspecting the pages closely. "How many ideas do you have in here?"

"Only a few well thought out ones, the others are still in progress." Eleanor admitted sheepishly.

"This is showing a lot of passion and dedication to your work. I'm very proud." The older woman smiled. "You have taken a very unfair hand and come out with new gumption."

"It wasn't easy."

"It seldom is, Miss Cordarri." McGonagall agreed. "These are impressive plans, though I am afraid your faith in your classmates is a bit...over enthusiastic."

"They can do it."

* * *

"Wow, what a great turn out." Eleanor gave a tight lipped smile to the greenhouse an evening a few weeks later. She had gotten permission from McGonagall and Dumbledore to create an Environmentalist club at Hogwarts and Professor Sprout excitedly agreed to sponsor it. The only people in the greenhouse were a giddy Professor Sprout and Neville Longbottom, a spaced out Luna Lovegood, and several unenthused first and second years who were given the choice between attending this meeting or attending detention. "Well, I'm Eleanor Cordarri and I'm really excited to get to work today. Basically this club is all about finding ways to love the world around Hogwarts. I've got a few exciting projects coming up that we are going to start working on. My first is a community garden and study space outside. I am going to start breaking ground on that soon to plant some vegetables that we could all enjoy. I am also planning on doing a clean up of the Black Lake from an invasive algae in the Spring and we need to start prepping for that by building nets and finding a tonic to prevent it from returning. We're going to meet here once a week so work on those projects." Eleanor paused and looked out at all of the blank faces who had nothing to say. "So let's start with the garden, does anyone have any ideas of what should go in it?"

Neville's hand shot up in the air. "We should plant holly bushes and mistletoe for people to decorate the dorms with for Christmas. I know a tonic for accelerated growth that will get them ready in time. It would be a great way to get the club's name out there!"

"That's a great idea, Neville." Eleanor said excitedly as she wrote 'holly and mistletoe' on the chalkboard.

"Oh, yes, Whim Whams love holly berries," Luna spoke up, "it will be great for them to get some to eat before hibernation."

"Oh," Eleanor blinked at her comment, "all the more reason." She smiled. Eleanor then looked to the younger students who were staring blankly.

Professor Sprout leaned in very close and whispered something Eleanor couldn't quite hear, but sounded as though it was a threat for more detention, and immediately their hands started to raise.

"Maybe we could have class out in the garden sometimes." One suggested.

"I like sweet potatoes." Another put in.

Eleanor wrote all of the ideas down and smiled. "Thank you so much. Um, I have an activity, you all could draw a picture of what you want the garden to look like and to have in it and we could possibly work from there? Yeah? I'll give you all a few minutes to work on it, let me pass out some parchment."

After all of the parchment was passed out, Eleanor noticed Draco standing in his Quidditch gear at the very back of the greenhouse, lurking in the shadows. With everyone immersed in their work, she bounded back to quietly say hello.

"How was practice?" She asked softly, leaning in to kiss him but pulling back at the smell of his sweat. She pulled him by the hand out of the greenhouse so they won't be overheard.

"Fine." He retorted shortly. "How's this going?"

"Um, okay. No one really seems interested besides Neville."

"Where are your friends?" Draco asked.

"Hermione is shadowing Head Girl tonight, and Harry is doing some Quidditch thing tonight."

"They don't have the Pitch." Draco stated in confusion.

"It's not practice, it's something else." Eleanor waved off.

"What is it?"

"I'm not giving away precious Gryffindor secrets just because I'm sleeping with the enemy." Eleanor joked, Draco only half cracked a smile and looked at the ground. Something about his mood was off, Eleanor could tell. "Are you going to stay? We're drawing our dream gardens right now."

"No, I need to get back." Draco snipped shortly again. Eleanor narrowed her eyes and leaned in, forcing him to look at her.

"What's up?" She asked.

"Nothing, alright? It's just… dream gardens and all that, it's...not really my thing." Draco retorted. Eleanor took a step back and examined him closely, but he didn't flinch under her gaze.

"Meet me later in the Room of Requirement." Eleanor stated.

"Eleanor, I really can't tonight." Draco rubbed his neck. Eleanor ground her teeth at the sound of her full name.

"It wasn't a question." She snapped back. Draco let out a breath and nodded once.

"I've got to go shower then I'll meet you there." He turned on his heel and began to walk away, looking mopey.

"I love you." Eleanor called after him in annoyance. He raised one hand in a small wave.

"You too." He let out quietly. Eleanor rolled her eyes at him, and wondered what got him into such a poor mood. She returned to the greenhouse and finished up the meeting, her heart definitely not in it anymore.

Once everyone dispersed, Professor Sprout came up and helped Eleanor to clean the chalkboard. "May I offer some advice?" She asked softly.

"Please." Eleanor begged.

"Try to use 'we' statements rather than 'I' statements when you talk about your plans. And don't present your activities like they are questions. This is what we are going to do and let's do it."

Eleanor let out a breath and nodded. "That's helpful, thank you."

"It's only going to get better."

* * *

"Okay, what's going on?" Eleanor immediately asked upon Draco's entry into the Room of Requirement. That night the room provided a large fireplace, and a comfy sofa. Eleanor had stopped by the kitchens and was able to convince Dobby to provide a bottle of wine for them. Draco's hair was still slightly wet from his shower and he was wearing casual clothes that indicated he was ready to go to bed. His Slytherin Quidditch Team sweatshirt clung to his body and his cheeks looked slightly flushed.

"Nothing, El, really. Practice was just frustrating."

"Frustrating how?" Eleanor wondered, bringing Draco into her arms and laying his head on her shoulder.

"I think they all hate me and I can't tell why. I didn't see them all summer, but I'm also not all buddy buddy with Potter. I don't know what I did."

"What makes you think they hate you?"

"Oh, I don't know El, I got rushed off my broom three different times." Draco sighed in agitation. "Luckily I was always close to the ground, but there is no way they were accidents."

"Are you okay?" Eleanor pulled away to look at him.

"I'm fine." Draco retorted, but winced at her movements.

"Take off the jacket." Eleanor demanded. "Don't make me ask twice."

"Yes ma'am." Draco tried to joke and continued to grimace while he slid the sweatshirt off to reveal purple bruises forming along his arm. Eleanor carefully lifted his shirt to inspect the bruising that was forming around his ribcage and down to his hips.

"Draco," Eleanor let out softly, feeling the raising of his skin beneath her fingers. "Why did they do this?"

"I just told you I didn't know." Draco hissed at the pain from her touch.

"You should see Madame Pomfrey."

"They'll all think I'm weak. It'll make it worse."

"Well, being hit by a broom going full speed so that you fall to the ground several times in the course of a few hours doesn't make you weak. You could have a cracked rib." Eleanor pointed out.

"If it doesn't get better I'll go." Draco agreed. "I just wish I knew what I did to upset them so badly."

"It isn't fair." Eleanor huffed.

"Nothing in life is fair, El, you know that."

"Do they really think they are going to beat Gryffindor by beating the shit out of their own Seeker?"

"Hold on, you think we have a shot at beating Gryffindor?" Draco asked teasingly.

"No." Eleanor responded automatically, as she was required to do as both honorary sister of the Gryffindor team captain, and a proud Gryffindor herself. "However, you do have a shot at beating the other two if they didn't push you to the ground."

"I'll have you wearing the Slytherin colors by the end of the season, I'm sure of it."

"You'd have to dress my dead body in them, because I would never let that happen."

Draco chuckled and leaned back into Eleanor, feeling slightly more uplifted by her presence.

* * *

_Dear Mum, _

_I hope you didn't throw this away when you saw Granger's name on the outside. El and I thought it might be safer to have her send it in case our comings and goings are being watched. I don't want to lead anyone to you. _

_Living with Eleanor and her people over the summer was not as bad as you would think. They were kind to me and made sure I was safe - no doubt the reason El get_s _along with them so well. _

_Everything feels different now. Part of me wishes things would go back to normal, but I guess normal wasn't what was working for us. I just want us to come out the other side safe. I really hope you're safe. _

_Oh, and I gave up being a Prefect. With the way everything was going it just didn't make sense to add that. But I'm still focusing on Quidditch and I think it's going to be a good season. El is working as a teaching assistant for two professors and she has so many ideas and is trying to make Hogwarts better. _

_I don't know when I'll see you next, but I hope it's soon. _

_Best, _

_Draco_

* * *

**Hi all! **This chapter jumped around a fair bit, but I wanted to give you all an insight on the different struggles and triumphs that Draco and Eleanor are facing separately so far this year! I've completely rethought and crafted the ending of this story so these little moments now are going to become bigger players later in the game! Please let me know what you're thinking about the story so far, and please, please stay safe and well!


	36. Chapter 36

"I'm convinced you're cheating," Tonks huffed in annoyance, throwing down her cards and shoving a handful of Knuts towards Remus. Remus and Sirius had come over to Tonks' flat for drinks that night, and Sirius had slipped out after their first round of cards, murmuring some excuse about how he didn't like gambling. Remus was not naive to his intentions, he knew his friend was trying to push him and this younger woman together, Remus could have blushed at the thought, but still, he continued to play.

"You can be convinced of whatever you want," Remus chuckled as he began to shuffle and redeal the cards, "it isn't going to change the fact that you're losing."

"I never lose." Tonks muttered, picking up her hand.

"You aren't doing a very good job of proving it." Remus laughed.

"Well, I usually don't play with cheaters."

"Hey now, Hufflepuff isn't the only house that values honesty." Remus chided jokingly.

"But you know what house does value winning and competitiveness? It isn't mine." Tonks replied quickly, defensive of her house.

"I'd believe you if your words didn't have so much fight in them." Remus was feeling quick on his feet, he hadn't felt that way in a long time, he liked being able to banter with someone again. It had been so long since he felt someone matched his humor. Tonks said nothing, only looked at him over her cards. She was very pretty, Remus' heart squeezed in guilt at the thought, but he knew it was true.

"Then I'll raise my white flag in surrender." Tonks laid her cards down. "It was a shitty hand anyway." She pushed up from the table and retreated to the kitchen. "You want another drink?"

Remus was collecting the cards on the table and stacking them nicely when he looked up to meet Tonks' gaze, there was something in her eyes that caused him to freeze. It was mischief, a certain brand of mischief he hadn't been in for some time. His heart nearly stopped. He didn't think highly enough of himself to think he deserved this attention, but he recognized that look in Tonks, the same one his love held for him so many years before.

"I shouldn't," Remus croaked out, averting his gaze, "I need to get back. I've intruded on your kindness for too long." He began gathering his coat.

"You haven't intruded," Tonks shook her head, "I'm happy to have you." She paused a moment while she watched him get ready to depart, almost desperate for more time with him. "I really like having you here, Remus."

"I appreciate that, Tonks. I like being here. But you don't need to entertain this old man any longer." Remus chuckled good naturedly.

"You're not an old man." Tonks wrinkled her nose. "I think you've got a lot of party left in you."

"Yes, well, when the party arrives, let me know." Remus joked, gesturing to the empty room around them.

"I'm serious." Tonks stated. "I really want you to stay." In a bold move, Tonks reached forward and grabbed Remus' hand. Guilt skyrocketed through Remus' body at their contact, understanding Tonks' intentions with more clarity now, he couldn't let it continue.

"I need to go." Remus let out quietly, and slipped his hand from hers. He missed feeling wanted, feeling loved. But last time he let himself get lost in that emotion, he had destroyed his favorite person in the world. He wouldn't let anyone get that close again.

"Remus, I-" Tonks started as the older man moved towards the Floo. She stopped her admission of feelings in its tracks and simply scooped up the Knuts that were left on the table. "Don't forget your winnings."

"Keep them," Remus insisted, then with a pang of guilt knowing his next words would hurt her but would result in her allowing him to leave, continued: "you're young, you can't turn down a few Knuts."

Tonks' mouth dropped open. She hated being reminded of how young she was, or how old he was. She didn't think it was a big deal, but he did and all he saw her as was a child, and in her eyes, he hung the stars in the sky. "I'm not that young," her eyes began turning black slowly as she lost her temper and so her ability to refrain from changing her appearance, "and I'm actually employed so I don't need the money."

Remus gave her a single nod. Though her words did sting a little, it had done the job, he was permitted to leave without any need for there to be an awkward talk about emotions.

He had expected Sirius to be asleep when he returned to Cordarri Castle, but found his friend waiting patiently by the Floo.

"You're back late." Sirius noted.

"Why did you leave?" Remus accused softly.

"I thought you two might want to be alone." Sirius wiggled his eyebrows at his friend.

"She wanted to be, but I can't." Remus shot back. "I needed you there."

"You do just fine on your own." Sirius assured. Remus rolled his eyes in frustration.

"I'm not doing this, Sirius."

"What do you mean?" Sirius demanded. "She's cute, and funny, and she knows about the whole werewolf thing. And not to mention, we're related so if you two get married, you'd be on my family tree."

"And that's a plus side?" Remus asked sarcastically. "She's wonderful but I can't be that person for her. She doesn't realize it now, but she isn't going to want someone who is so old, and so poor, and so dangerous. She has so much life in her."

"You know who she reminds me of?" Sirius started, ignoring all of his friends' concerns.

"Don't say it," Remus warned, knowing exactly what was going to pass through Sirius' lips, "I know who you're going to say, and I'm asking you not to."

"As long as you recognize it." Sirius shrugged. "I think it's just interesting the kind of women you attract."

"Shove it." Remus muttered, feeling like he was young again, rather than an aging father of a teenage girl. "I can't be with Tonks. I promised Nora I'd come back for her after the war was over."

"You see, I would accept that answer, but it's total bullshit." Sirius shook his head.

"What do you mean total bullshit? You don't know what I promised her before I took her memories away." Remus defended.

"You didn't restore them when Voldemort fell last time and you thought the war was over." Sirius pointed out.

"I'd just lost all four of my best friends in the course of 24 hours." Remus stated.

"Yeah, then you've had thirteen years before this all started up again, so I think your excuse is bullshit. I think you don't believe you deserve love so you deny yourself any little glimmer of it." Sirius stood up as he said this and began to leave the room, but turned around and delivered a final message. "Do what you want, Moony, I'm not in control of you. You can be with Tonks and leave Nora be, or you can tell Tonks what you promised Nora and wait until this bloody war is over and restore her memories. What you can't do - no - what I won't let you do is be alone forever because you think you need to punish yourself for what Greyback did to you when you were a child."

* * *

"I don't mean to keep bringing this up, because I really am happy for him but I just think it is funny how he was so critical of Harry going to Madam Puddifoot's with Cho last year and made so much fun, but when Lavender wants to do it, he thinks it's a great idea because he likes their cakes." Hermione had been huffing about Ron's date with Lavender Brown all morning. Always qualifying her annoyance with the assurance that she 'really was happy for him' and then would continue on with her complaints. Eleanor listened knowingly and didn't give much input, knowing her friend didn't even realize her own emotions yet. "And honestly, Lavender is just so daft, how could he have an actual conversation with her?"

"Ron is pretty daft, too." Eleanor put in with a soft smile as the two girls walked the streets of Hogsmeade together. Ginny and Harry had split off to get a Butterbeer, and the group had agreed to meet up after Ron's date.

"Not daft like her." Hermione shook her head quickly. "He's daft, but not empty headed."

"I didn't realize we disliked Lavender so much." Eleanor noted.

"I've always found her irritating. Her and Parvarti drive me mad with their Divination worship and endless gossip. You don't have to dislike them just because I do."

"Oh, I most definitely do." Eleanor laughed. "What kind of friend would I be if I didn't?"

"Well that logic didn't work with Draco." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"That was different, I loved him." Eleanor shrugged.

"Speaking of, where is he today?"

"He's meeting with Snape about this Ministry Internship he wants to apply for. Then I think he was going to study with Blaise." Eleanor replied. "Oh, he wanted us to check the Post Office and see if his mum sent anything."

"Ministry Internship?" Hermione questioned while turning down an alley to get to the Post Office. "Are his grades good enough for that?"

Eleanor rolled her eyes at her friend. "I don't tell him your grades and I don't tell you his. You'll find out when the class standings come out at the end of the term."

"What is the point of you dating him if you can't at least give me something to work with?" Hermione ground her teeth. "Should I be doing more? Professor Slughorn has this ridiculous club that I was invited to but didn't want to be a part of, but maybe it will boost my standing." She began wondering.

"Slug Club?" Eleanor clarified.

"Yeah, how do you know about that?" Hermione asked, knowing her friend wasn't in a potions class and had no way of knowing about Slug Club otherwise.

"No reason," Eleanor brushed off quickly, having gotten her intel from Draco, "but you should definitely do it."

"Damn it, Draco." Hermione said exasperatedly while pulling the door to the Post Office open.

"Hey, we're breaking ground on the garden in a few weeks, help me out with that, it might boost your standing a bit!"

"Won't Draco also be helping with that?" Hermione asked.

"Yes, but he isn't the lead of his own club working on a collaboration." Eleanor reminded. "I think S.P.E.W and the Environmental Herbology club can have a cross over, don't you?" Hermione cracked a smile at her friend and nodded.

The Post Office clerk handed Hermione her mail, and she thumbed through some Muggle magazines, and a few letters from her grandparents wishing her a happy start of term, then came across a letter with an unfamiliar name.

"'Aunt Cis'?" Hermione read out.

"Narcissa," Eleanor smiled excitedly.

* * *

The group had met at Three Broomsticks, and nearly immediately Hermione had picked an argument with Ron, and Ginny had excitedly seen Dean and went to sit with him, which put Harry on edge. The letter from Narcissa felt like it was burning a hole in Eleanor's pocket, so she dismissed herself early from the pub to walk back to the castle. Harry jumped at the offer to walk with her and tried, unsuccessfully, to not look at Ginny on the way out.

"What's going on there?" Eleanor asked with a raised brow.

"Nothing, she's with Dean." Harry bit out.

"But you don't want her to be?"

"She can do whatever she likes." Harry shrugged and spoke through gritted teeth. Eleanor nudged his shoulder a bit roughly to try to shake him out of his tension.

"Yeah, she can," Eleanor replied, "and you don't have to be happy about it."

"Well, Ron doesn't like it." Harry tried to supply.

"Ron is a bit preoccupied at the moment."

"Yeah, with his 'Lav-Lav'." Harry began chuckling.

"No, he didn't call her that, did he?"

"I'm afraid he did." Harry confirmed.

"That boy better not say that in front of Hermione, she won't let him forget it."

"What?" Harry asked, apparently not catching on to Hermione's emotions.

"She was giving Ron grief all morning about how wrapped up he is in Lavender." Eleanor supplied, not going into full detail, Harry would figure it out soon enough.

* * *

Upon Eleanor's arrival back at the castle, it took a while to find Draco. She searched through the library for a bit before finally finding him, Blaise, and Crabbe sitting at a table with parchment and ink sprawled out around them. Though Eleanor had figured he would be with his friends, she was disappointed that she wouldn't be able to show off the letter right away. She was surprised by how excited she was to see what Narcissa had to say, and to share in the experience with Draco.

"Hello boys," Eleanor greeted happily, "what are we working on?" Crabbe and Blaise both gave her a tight-lipped, unenthusiastic smile, but Draco gave her a full grin.

"Potions." He responded.

"Oh, yuck." Eleanor wrinkled her nose as she peered over Draco's shoulder to look at the essay, and didn't understand a word. "I'm glad I dropped that."

"'Dropped' is a funny way of saying 'didn't get an OWL for it'." Draco laughed, Eleanor rolled her eyes at him.

"How've you two been?" She turned to Blaise and Crabbe now, hoping her cheer might send them away so she could talk to Draco alone.

"Fine." Crabbed responded, but Blaise said nothing.

"I was wondering if I might borrow Draco for a few minutes?" She addressed Blaise directly then.

"Dying for a snog that bad, Cordarri?" He asked without looking up from his reading.

"If you've ever snogged him, you'd understand the need." Eleanor shot back good naturedly, Blaise cracked a hint of a smile.

"Already have, wasn't impressed." Blaise retorted, causing Eleanor to chuckle. He seemed distant yes, but rather normal despite his circumstances.

"Well, I'll give him a few pointers and you let me know how he fares." Eleanor packed up Draco's books and pulled him away from his essay.

"El, can I just get this thought down?" He asked with a laugh, but Eleanor continued to drag him and his things through the maze of the library. They found a pair of armchairs unoccupied in a far corner of the library, and Eleanor pulled out the letter from his mother. Draco took it excitedly, surprising even himself with how giddy he was to hear from his mother. He opened it eagerly and there were a few pictures that fell out with it. He handed the pictures to Eleanor and she began to look through them. They were all unmoving, Muggle pictures. And many included her and another woman with kind eyes and a big smile. There were pictures of the two of them on the beach, or on bikes. Even one of Narcissa lounging in the living room of the beach house with a beer bottle in hand. Eleanor looked over Draco's shoulder to see what Narcissa had said.

_Dear Draco (and presumably, Eleanor will read this too…), _

_I can't express to you how excited I was to receive that letter. I recognized your handwriting straight away and was so elated to hear from you. I'm so glad classes are going well so far, and that you both are safe under the protection of Eleanor's family. What is it about the family of Eleanor that is always so willing to protect and love us Malfoys? Any ideas about life after Hogwarts? Any news on the Ministry Internship? _

_I've been having so much fun here. The sun is always shining and it's always warm. The house is little, but fits me fine and is right on the beach. I've gotten rather good at cooking for myself, and swimming in the ocean, and even learned to ride a bike! My neighbor, Gladys, is just delightful. She's included in many of the pictures I sent your way. She's a recent divorcee who moved to the beach to get away from her ex-husband, who was such a piece of work! Her and I are having so much fun and doing a lot of activities together. We're going to start taking a yoga class next week - whatever that is! _

_I miss you both so much, and hope that when it is safe you two might consider coming out and living with me for a while so I can share some of my new experiences. I've never felt so free. _

_Write soon. _

_Love you darlings dearly, _

_Mum _

"Your mum is a babe," Eleanor noted, pulling out a picture of Narcissa and presumably Gladys, lounging on the sand in shorts and tank tops, "she looks really happy."

"Yeah, she does." Draco agreed, smiling at the letter and the pictures. "Maybe that's what we should do. Run away, live on the beach until the world rights itself again." Draco let out a sigh.

"Maybe," Eleanor said softly, "but I think we have a bigger part to play here."

"Yeah," Draco nodded, "I think you might be right."

* * *

**Bit of a filler chapter here,** but I wanted the chance to show you what some other characters were getting themselves into during this time! I'm getting so excited for what is coming so stay tuned! And as always, let me know what you think! I love hearing your feelings, thoughts, ideas, everything! Your words always motivate me so much and are so very appreciated!


	37. Chapter 37

Eleanor strained her eyes to try to find Draco in the air on his broom. With the sun setting earlier, and a Quidditch Match fast approaching, evenings on the Pitch started turning into drills in the darkness. Still, Eleanor wanted to catch a peak and say hello before retiring to the Gryffindor Common Room.

She'd been trying to avoid her friends in the last few days. When Ron wasn't snogging Lavender in some corner, he was picking fights with Hermione, who would let out her frustration with Harry and Eleanor, but really it was just Eleanor listening to most of it because Harry was either watching Dean and Ginny, or staring deeply into his Potions book. Eleanor tried to comfort Hermione as much as she could, after all, last year when things were bad with Draco, Eleanor wanted nothing more than a shoulder to cry on. But the trouble was Hermione rarely cried, she mostly got angry - it was one of the qualities the two girls had in common. And if Eleanor were being honest with herself, Hermione's anger frightened her sometimes, so she tried to take leave and find refuge with Draco when she could.

She heard a whistle blow from above her head and heard the quiet descent of seven broomsticks. Most of them made their way to the far end of the Pitch where the locker rooms were located, but one broom found its way to here.

"I never thought you'd be petty enough to spy." Draco joked once his feet touched the ground.

"Spy?" Eleanor repeated in mock shock, "How could you think so little of me?"

"What'd you think? How do we look?" Draco's teasing tone changed to one of seriousness.

"Honestly, I couldn't really see you with how dark it was. I just wanted to walk back with you. Professor Sprout and I were plotting out the garden."

"Likely excuse." Draco chuckled, but grabbed her hand in his and held his broom firmly in the other. The pair walked slowly so as not to bump into any of the others on the Slytherin Quidditch team, and even paused outside of the main entrance to snog for a few minutes to buy themselves more time - or so that was their excuse. Eleanor cherished these quiet, domestic moments with Draco. Their lives were full of death, mistrust, Death Eaters, Voldemort, a war. But when Draco got his fingers, still gloved from practice, tangled in her curly hair, or when her back was pressed against a cold wall as they kissed quietly, avoiding the eyes of professors, or when he whispered that he loved her so lowly that only Eleanor could hear, all of these things made her feel like life was normal.

With the way things were going - friends becoming Death Eaters, Harry having secret meetings with Dumbledore to prepare him for his inevitable encounter with Voldemort, the Order ramping up security - Eleanor didn't know when the sense of normalcy she had would vanish from her life.

So her and Draco stayed interlocked under the moonlit sky though they were both cold. Their frigid noses would bump every once and awhile, but Eleanor stayed firmly there. Pinned gently between him and the wall, their lips moving together so pleasurably the world could have stopped and Eleanor would have been content.

"Oh, honestly you two." Eleanor heard Hermione groan from a few yards away. "They're about to close the doors for the night, get inside." Eleanor froze beneath Draco and giggled lightly, while Draco tried not to look sheepish.

"Eleanor, have some respect." Ron chimed in jokingly, to which Hermione shot him an irritated glance. Eleanor felt her heart drop slightly for her friend, so in love with Ron, and unable to express it. Eleanor imagined their Prefect rounds together must have been torture. She knew Ron bounced between making Hermione laugh to talking nonstop about Lavender. Hermione always returned confused and hurt.

"Well, at least we had the decency to keep away from the majority of the public eye, isn't that right, Won-Won?" Eleanor snapped back, irritated on behalf of Hermione. Ron turned red at that and looked away.

"Come on, 'Mione, we've got to finish our rounds." Ron urged, grabbing Hermione's hand to lead them away from Draco and Eleanor out of embarrassment for his nickname being revealed to his sworn enemy. Hermione looked over her shoulder to Eleanor as she was pulled away, and glanced down at their intertwined hands. Eleanor gave her a sad smile and a slight nod, a silent promise to wait up for her so they could discuss her confusion.

"I'll walk you back up to the common room." Draco offered, Eleanor tore her eyes from Hermione and Ron and smiled gratefully at him.

"Always a gentleman." She chirped happily and fell into step with him.

"Aren't you glad that I don't lead you on like that?" Draco chuckled.

"Wow, you're a whole six months ahead of Ron on the 'telling girls how you feel' and being more emotionally mature growth rate. Do you want me to bake a cake?" Eleanor quipped sarcastically. He had been doing a lot better by not being vicious to her friends, but she still needed to check him for sarcastic comments every now and again.

"Okay, smart ass, watch it. I was just making an observation."

"How's Blaise?" Eleanor tried to shift the subject from her friends to his.

"I dunno, fine, I suppose. As fine as you can be." Draco shrugged. "Sometimes, I forget he's even...you know."

"I wish I could forget." Eleanor muttered softly, kicking a piece of loose parchment on the floor out of her way.

"What does that mean?" Draco asked.

"I mean, I wish that I wasn't worried about the lives of everyone I loved because there is a Death Eater in the school every minute of every day. It would be nice to have a break."

Draco paused for a moment and looked at Eleanor critically. "I thought you understood why I don't want to turn him in right now."

"I do," Eleanor nodded, but didn't continue her thought and returned her eyes to the ground.

"You just don't agree." Draco finished for her, crossing his arms across his chest.

"It isn't that I don't agree, it's just-" Eleanor stopped herself and ran her hands through her hair, "look, let's not do this tonight. I don't want to do this."

"I do. I want to do this." Draco insisted, then waved a hand, welcoming her to continue her thoughts. "I'd love to hear Eleanor's honest opinion about my decision, perhaps you might also explain why you weren't honest in the first place."

"Draco, stop." Eleanor was almost begging now, she didn't want to argue with Draco about Blaise. He was Draco's best friend, and Draco would get defensive, the way Eleanor knew she always did with her own friends.

"Why can't you just be honest? I'm not angry, I'm just curious." That was a lie, Eleanor could tell plainly in his voice. She rolled her eyes slightly at him.

"We're tired. We're going to say things we regret if we aren't well rested. Let's talk tomorrow." Eleanor continued walking up the stairs but Draco stopped moving.

"I won't regret what I'm saying." Draco stated firmly. "Just tell me what you're feeling about this whole situation and be honest."

Eleanor sucked in a breath and tried to form her words carefully before she started talking. "I think you helping and protecting him is very noble, loyal, and very characteristically you." Eleanor paused and looked at her feet for a moment. "But we've a pretty good idea of what he's up to now, so at this point if we aren't actively stopping him and getting him help, we're partly responsible for whatever shit goes down as a result of it."

Draco clenched his teeth. "You want me to turn him in?" He asked tightly.

"Is it the worst idea?" Eleanor asked. "I mean, is it? That was supposed to be you and you and your family got protected."

"Not all of my family." Draco returned quickly. "He's still my father, Eleanor, even for all his sins."

"I never said he wasn't." Eleanor huffed, grinding her teeth at the sound of her full name from him.

"Look, I know you don't get it because your parents were perfect, but these people, _my people, _would do anything for their families. Even if it is not morally sound. That's what he is doing right now, protecting his family. What kind of friend would I be if I turned him in and got his whole family killed."

"_Your people_?" Eleanor repeated. "What are you talking about? I know exactly what position he is in right now. We grew up together, Draco, your people are my people."

"You found new people, Eleanor. You lost one family and fell directly into another one. The world doesn't work that way for everyone. If I turn him in, his parents are dead, and where is he going to go? All of the people who he grew up with will feel betrayed, all of the people he ran to for protection won't trust him. Are you going to take him in? Fill Cordarri Castle with your own personal island of misfits who can't go home again?"

"Why shouldn't I?"

"You are not reasonable. You cannot save everyone." Draco retorted.

"So we should just let Death Eaters walk around when there are three people in this school that Voldemort is actively searching for, and probably a hundred others he wants to kill for fun?"

"That isn't Blaise's goal."

"But he's working for that goal."

"The world is not black and white, Eleanor. Things are complicated. I thought you understood that. I thought we were on the same page. Where is this coming from?"

"I thought you were going to figure out what he needed to do, and help him get out."

"I never said that. I specifically said that I was going to help him. And you said 'I figured that's what you meant,' those exact words. I'm not sure where the confusion is."

Eleanor rubbed her forehead in frustration. She wanted to scream at him but was forcing herself back. "When we had that conversation, I thought that maybe his mission would be to keep tabs on us, learn more about ways to travel and report back. I didn't think they would actually make a 16 year old try to sneak a bunch of Death Eaters into the school."

"We don't know for sure if that's what he's doing." Draco clarified.

"Okay, what do you think they want a Vanishing Cabinet restored for? Hide and seek?" Eleanor raised her voice then, but immediately quieted, realizing she was still in a public part of the school though it wasn't crowded.

"I don't know what to tell you, Eleanor. I'm not turning him in and putting him and his family in danger when we don't even know if he's dangerous yet." Draco shrugged. "I'm sorry you're apparently so disappointed in me. I wish you would have told me that from the beginning."

"I thought you understood my concerns. I thought you shared them."

"Of course I share them! I'm not an idiot." Draco took a deep breath. "I obviously realize this is risky, but he's fine. He trusts me and he's still coming to me for support. If I break that trust, we lose our information, and he loses his whole family."

"I just hope you know what you're doing." Eleanor finally puffed out.

"As much as you apparently like to think that I'm stupid and that I don't realize how fucked this whole situation is, I do. I don't need your snark, Eleanor, I really don't."

"I don't think you're stupid." Eleanor rolled her eyes. "I think you're forgetting that there are a lot of lives at risk here. Including mine."

Draco stared at her with an open mouth. His eyes wide for a few seconds before he rubbed his face and looked at the ground. "If you think I forget, even for a second, about your life then this is a really sad moment for me, Eleanor." He turned on his heel and began walking down the stairs, away from Eleanor, while she just stood and watched. "I'll see you tomorrow." He let out quietly, sadly. "Goodnight."

After Draco disappeared into the shadows, Eleanor turned and began walking quietly back to the Gryffindor Common Room. Tears slowly rolled down her cheeks and she only wiped them when she was faced with the Fat Lady.

"Baubles." Eleanor bit out.

"Are you alright?" The Fat Lady asked.

"Baubles." Eleanor repeated firmly. The Fat Lady rolled her eyes.

"I was just asking, no need to be rude." She huffed as she swung open so that Eleanor could climb into the Common Room.

"Eleanor," Harry stood up when she entered, only a few fourth years remained in the far corner of the Common Room so Eleanor felt less embarrassed for being teary. "What's wrong?"

"I guess I just forgot how good Draco and I can be at arguing." Eleanor whimpered slightly, wiping another tear. Harry gave her a tender hug and offered her a crumpled napkin from his pocket - one he'd obviously shoved in there at dinner and had since forgotten about. Eleanor chuckled slightly and took it to wipe her eyes.

"What were you arguing about?" Harry asked.

Eleanor wanted to tell him. She wanted validation that she wasn't being unfair, that it was normal to be afraid. But telling Harry meant outing Blaise when Draco swore he had it under control.

"Something stupid." Eleanor chuckled dishonestly. "You'll only make fun."

At the end of the day, Eleanor felt she had to trust Draco.

* * *

**Oh man,** I'm sorry. Draco and Eleanor were doing so well for so long, but even the best couples hit rough patches, and they are pretty good at arguing! I'm writing ahead and y'all, I'm so stoked about what is in store so I hope you'll forgive a bit of trouble in paradise to see what comes next! Let me know what you think, all of your reviews really energize my writing SO much and are always so appreciated, so please, please leave one so I know how I'm doing!


	38. Chapter 38

Draco sat silently next to Eleanor during study hall the following morning. She was surprised to see him so readily back beside her after their argument, but grateful to see him nonetheless.

"Draco, I-" Eleanor started in a whisper. Draco shook his head slightly to stop her. "But I-" she began again.

"We'll talk about it later, El." Draco said, exasperated. But he wasn't using her full name anymore so she accepted this and resigned to remain silent during the hour of study in the Great Hall. Harry eyed them carefully from further down the table, leaving his Transfiguration essay ignored. Only when Professor McGonagall strode over to him and reminded him to use his time wisely did Harry lower his gaze.

"Why is Potter staring at us?" Draco demanded softly, breaking his apparent vow of silence, "did you tell him?"

Eleanor rolled her eyes at him and put down the 3rd year Care of Magical Creatures worksheet she'd been grading for Hagrid. "I thought you'd know me well enough to know that I don't share your secrets even if I don't always agree." She bit out. "We'll talk later." She reminded him.

"Eleanor," Draco pressed again.

"I was frustrated last night after our argument and came back to the Common Room in tears so I assumed Harry is interested to see how you'll treat me today and might also be slightly upset with you, is that what you wanted to hear?" Eleanor snapped.

"Well, I wasn't in a great mood when I got back either, but you don't see my friends staring daggers at you." Draco huffed.

"You're ridiculous." Eleanor groaned. "I don't like arguing with you."

"Then stop arguing." Draco shot back.

"For Merlin's sake, Draco, enough." Eleanor said, louder than intended, and definitely louder than the whisper-level permitted. Several heads popped up to look at them, and murmurs began flourishing. Professor Snape began stalking towards the now sheepish looking couple.

"Though I have very little care for your lover's quarrel, the same cannot be said for your classmates. Perhaps save the marital spats for a time when it is not so distracting to the general public." Professor Snape drawled in annoyance. Eleanor's cheeks blazed red and set her face in a scowl.

"I was just leaving, Professor." She announced quietly and glared at Draco for a moment before collecting her things and beginning to leave the Great Hall.

"Merlin, shit," Draco muttered to himself as he rubbed his forehead swiftly before shooting up to follow her. "El, wait," He pleaded quietly, but if she heard him she didn't let on. He swore to himself again and began sloppily gathering his things and trying not to look desperate as he followed after her, but that attempt to save some aloofness was unsuccessful as everyone in study hall was watching him trail after her; either trying to show some decency by pretending to look away or just staring outright. Any other time that Draco wasn't slowly descending into a panic at the thought of watching his most beloved person walking away from him, he would have sneered at the onlookers.

The hallways were sparse of students, most of them studying or in class at this hour of the day, however it wasn't empty. This fact is what kept Draco from calling out, but he did jog to catch up with Eleanor. The advantage of long legs over her small stride helped him to stop her quickly.

"El, stop." He said once he skidded to a halt in front of her. He could see the angry tears forming in her eyes, but they hadn't fallen yet. She set her jaw angrily and pushed by him, her shoulder making rough contact with his chest. Draco winced for a moment before following her again. "What is going on?" He asked in near desperation, unsure of how this all got so out of hand.

"I don't like feeling like the weight of people's lives are on my shoulders. I just want someone to take care of us." Eleanor bit back. "I don't want to be dealing with all of this without having some support."

"You have me-" Draco tried.

"We're children, Draco." Eleanor whimpered softly. "For a year I've been dealing with adult shit without having someone I can rely on who will clean it up for me when it all goes wrong. This all just feels like it's growing out of our control and I want to give it to someone more capable. I understand why you don't, believe me, I do. And I trust you when you saw that you have it under control but you can't blame the child in me for wanting to pass off these problems to somebody else." ELeanor sucked in a deep breath. "It isn't that I don't trust you. I'm just terrified. I don't want to be responsible for other people's lives anymore. I hardly want to be responsible for my own."

"I understand." Draco let out softly, grabbing some books from Eleanor's hands to lighten her load. "I do. We're both in way over our heads and it's just us making decisions for big family names."

Eleanor let go of some of the tension in her shoulders once hearing Draco's understanding voice. It had all gotten so complicated, all she wanted was to wash her hands of everything, all she wanted was to be a child again. "I'm sorry," she breathed, "I don't want you to think I don't trust you with this kind of thing. I just wish I didn't have to."

In that moment Draco saw her as something he didn't see her as often. His brave, courageous, tenacious girl was absolutely petrified.

* * *

The official groundbreaking of the community garden got pushed until early Spring as the weather changed to snow too quickly. This saddened Eleanor as one of her greatest distractions was now gone. Though Draco and Eleanor hadn't completely solved their conflict, they weren't actively snipping at each other either anymore. Draco did feel sad for Eleanor that something she had been working so hard on was thwarted, and decided to swallow his pride and take her to Three Broomsticks with her friends over the weekend trip to Hogsmeade.

The couple walked quietly behind the three of Eleanor's Gryffindor friends the whole way from Hogwarts. They held hands though the intimacy was not there. It felt like they were going through the motions. Eleanor was holding back tears at the fact that for the first time in a long time, she felt that her and Draco were far apart. She wanted them to be a team again.

Though Draco had honest intentions of sitting with Eleanor's friends, he did feel an intense amount of relief when Eleanor pulled him away to a private table upon their entry of the Three Broomsticks. As he looked back a final time at Harry, Ron, and Hermione, Draco caught sight of Blaise standing under the stairs. Draco locked eyes with his friend and gave him a nod in greeting. This greeting went ignored, no - intentionally snubbed. Draco felt a little shocked, annoyed, and felt a pang of terror go through him. If Blaise was beginning to brush Draco aside, then Draco couldn't protect Eleanor.

Draco checked to see if Eleanor had seen the interchange, but her eyes were locked on the people passing by the window outside and she hugged her arms to herself. Draco turned back to look at Blaise once more, but he was gone. What he did see was Harry looking directly into his eyes. The two young men shared a nod, knowing they'd seen the same thing. Then Harry gestured towards Eleanor, reminding Draco where his attention should be in that moment.

Oddly, Draco felt grateful for Harry's watchful - almost paranoid - eye over the comings and goings of Hogwarts students, and even his eye for Eleanor. Draco shook his head slightly, his own thoughts surprised him. If only his eleven year old self could see him now, maybe he could have been saved years of pent up anger.

"You okay?" Draco asked Eleanor softly as he joined her at the table. Eleanor offered a tight smile and nodded. "No you're not." Draco shook his head at her.

"Things just feel off, that's all." Eleanor provided. "You feel it too, I know."

Draco's eyes fell to the table top and he leaned back in his seat. He clenched his jaw a few times and refused to look up at Eleanor again.

"We'll get through it, we always do." Eleanor continued softly and began wringing her hands together on top of the table. "Have you heard anything more about the Ministry Internship?"

"Slughorn said he might have a connection for me to reach out too, but I'm not sure. He seems a bit...I don't know how to describe it," Draco tried to chuckle. "I think he would prefer me not be there, having disgraced parents, I don't have much use for him."

"You're brilliant. He sees that." Eleanor encouraged with a smile. Draco shrugged.

"He's having a Christmas Party in a few weeks." Draco started, Eleanor rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I've heard all about that." She chuckled slightly, thinking about Hermione's ranting over her change of Christmas Party plans due to Ron's budding relationship. She eyed the two of them from across the pub, they looked like they were arguing again, and Harry's eyes were trained on Ginny and Dean, snogging in the opposite corner.

"Would you want to come with me?" Draco asked. "You're kind of my built in date." He tried to make her smile. She cracked a small one which made his heart squeeze slightly in delight.

"I guess that's one of the perks of having a girlfriend," Eleanor teased lightly, placing her hand in the middle of the table for Draco to hold.

Draco stared at her open hand, reluctant as always to show affection with some many people around. He knew Eleanor needed his reassurance, his love. Things between them were fragile and it felt that at any point, any action of his could cause an irreparable rift between them. He sucked in a deep breath and placed his fingertips on top of hers, tracing the inside of her palm gently. "One of the many perks." Draco agreed. Eleanor smiled brightly at him. It seemed as though it was the first bright smile he'd seen from her in a long time.

His concentration on Eleanor's happy demeanor was broken by Blaise leaving the Three Broomsticks in a bit of a hurry. Draco's eyes followed him and then looked over to Harry, who was lost in a conversation with Ginny who had walked over to join the group. Draco ground his teeth and returned his eyes to the window, trying to follow Blaise's movement but he was lost in the crowd now, putting Draco on edge. Eleanor had watched Draco's change of demeanor closely.

"Do you want to go?" She suggested softly.

"Yeah, I just want to keep an eye on him." Draco whispered. Eleanor nodded in understanding and began to stand collecting her things. Her friends looked as though they were preparing to leave as well and walked over to join her and Draco.

"Alright, Eleanor?" Harry asked softly, glancing only briefly at Draco who was too distracted to be annoyed at Potter's constant assumption that he was the one causing problems.

"Yeah, we were just going to start heading back. Draco has some things he needs to do back at the castle." Eleanor replied, grabbing Draco's hands with hers in an attempt to bring him back to reality.

They all wrapped themselves in their scarves, hats, jackets, and gloves before exiting the pub and beginning the snowy trek back to the castle. Eleanor could barely keep her eyes on the path, constantly looking up at Draco, attempting to see what was in his brain. She knew better than to bring it up with her friends in such close proximity, and saying so would start another fight, but she wanted to know why he was so set on protecting Blaise when his actions caused Draco such anxiety.

Then, a scream pulled her out of her thoughts. She looked to the path ahead of her to see Katie Bell suspended in the air, her face stuck in a perpetual scream as her body began to be flung through the air at breakneck speed.

"I told her not to touch it," her companion yelled in terror. Eleanor's eyes were drawn to the package that was strewn across the ice.

"Don't touch that," Hagrid's booming voice came in a panic behind them as he scrambled to collect Katie in his arms, "only the wrappin's."

Draco and Eleanor shared a knowing look, full of fear.

* * *

Back at the castle, Katie's friend - Leanne - recounted the story of how Katie came into custody of the cursed necklace to Professor McGonagall.

"She said it's important it was delivered to Professor Dumbledore." Leanne added. Professor McGonagall looked disturbed by this bit of information and nodded solemnly.

"Thank you, you may go." She permitted, then looked disapprovingly at the students left in front of her. "I'm surprised to see you here, Mr. Malfoy, but everyone else…" She trailed off and looked at Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Eleanor with raised brows.

"It seems I've gotten myself rather involved." Draco added quietly, glancing at Eleanor.

"Then I suppose you should get used to being in this position." McGonagall quipped. "Oh, Severus," she called as Snape passed the classroom, "This is your area of expertise. What do you think about this?"

Snape observed the necklace closely for a moment or two. "I think Miss Bell is lucky to be alive." He murmured.

"W-was she cursed?" Draco asked, almost afraid to know the answer. He lightly squeezed Eleanor's hand, bracing himself for his suspicions being confirmed.

"I know Katie." Harry spoke up, "When she's off the Quidditch Pitch, she wouldn't hurt a fly. She wouldn't deliver a cursed necklace knowingly."

"Yes, she was cursed." Professor McGonagall confirmed.

"There's a Death Eater in the school." Harry stated, looking harshly at Snape who glared back at him.

"Do you have any evidence?" Snape drawled.

"Do I need any? A classmate was just cursed to kill our headmaster." Harry snapped.

"Careful, Potter." Snape warned.

"If you see any suspicious behavior, Mr. Potter, I encourage you to speak up, but otherwise any accusation could be detrimental." Professor McGonagall said. Eleanor looked at Draco, urging him to say something. She could see his mind was swimming with all of the revelations, but he continued to stay silent. "You all may go." She dismissed them.

"We all know what we saw this summer," Harry huffed, "why do we need to keep covering for him?"

"Dumbledore said-" Hermione started.

"No, Hermione, he's lying. He's lying to Dumbledore, he must be." Harry continued to seeth.

Draco slowed his pace and pulled Eleanor along with him. Ron, Harry, and Hermione continued walking ahead and Eleanor looked up at Draco in confusion. He could see the hurt in her eyes, the disappointment that he knew something and didn't say it.

Seeing Katie Bell suspended in the air had struck a chord with him. It could've been Eleanor. As far back as his history with Blaise went, he knew that his old friend's loyalty wasn't invincible. At the end of the day he had a mission, and if he was instructed to hurt Eleanor, he would. Draco was terrified.

"I need to talk to Dumbledore."

* * *

**Hi all! **It's been awhile, so sorry for the delay! I love hearing from you and what you're thinking and feeling, so please leave a review and let me know!


	39. Chapter 39

Though in the darkening days of the coming war there was little to be cheerful about during the Order Meetings, there was a general excitement from quite a few members due to the upcoming return of the kids from Hogwarts. It was only a few weeks away and the joy was tangible. Everyone dispersed from the meeting at Grimmauld Place with a bit of a spring in their step.

"Tonks, could I talk to you a minute?" Remus asked once only Sirius and the Twins remained. Tonks gave him a curious look. The pair had previously been rather close, but since their last encounter at her flat, they had barely spoken. She gave him a slight nod and exited the dining room so that they were away from the prying ears of those who were left.

"Did you just want the chance to be a bit more condescending?" Tonks questioned with crossed arms.

"I'm sorry about that, Tonks, I really am." Remus' shoulders sagged while he looked at the ground.

"You know how I feel about you." She murmured in annoyance.

"I do, that's what I need to talk to you about." Remus pressed. He hated himself for the hopeful glimmer that lit up in Tonks' eyes. "I know I don't talk about this much, but you should know that Eleanor's mother…I loved her very much. Some things transpired, things I'm not proud of, and for her protection I took her memories for the duration of the war. I promised I'd return them when our world was safer to be a part of. I think you're a wonderful woman, Tonks, I really, truly do. But I have a duty to Nora, a promise to keep."

Tonks didn't look at him, she kept her eyes firmly on the floorboards between them and seemed to mull his words over in her head. "Why didn't you do it the first time? When You-Know-Who tried to kill Harry?"

Remus hesitated a moment, then took a breath. "I was grieving, all of my friends disappeared in the span of a day. I couldn't get a job. Death Eaters were still prowling the streets. At least originally, then it was mostly just to punish myself." Remus sighed. "But now, with Eleanor in my life, she's reminded me so much of her mother and these feelings I've been ignoring for so long…" Remus hated himself, "It wouldn't be fair to you to be in a relationship when my feelings for Nora are still so present, and my intentions of reuniting with her after the war are so strong. I hope you can understand."

Tonks again said nothing, and refused to look up. Remus nodded once, angry with himself but satisfied by putting the whole situation to bed. He turned to leave the room and rejoin Sirius so they could return to Cordarri Castle for the evening. With his back turned, Tonks was finally able to look at him.

"I have one question. You owe me that much." She spoke softly, yet firmly. Remus stopped in his tracks but didn't turn around. "Do you have any belief that you will live to see the end of this war? Or do you think you are just going to deny yourself love and wait out the clock until you die in battle?"

Neither of them even breathed. Those words hung in the air, poignant and stale.

Remus kept walking, and Tonks had her answer.

* * *

Eleanor paced at the bottom of the stairs that led to Dumbledore's office. She'd wanted to go with Draco, to hear what Dumbledore had to say, but Draco insisted it was something he needed to do on his own. Eleanor understood his sentiment and was even proud of him for it, but not knowing what was being said was driving her mad.

She bit down on her thumbnail and tried to think about anything besides Blaise Zabini, but as she got lost in this practice, the very man she was trying to avoid thinking about came walking around the corner.

"Eleanor," He greeted softly, eyeing the statue guarding Dumbledore's office and Eleanor carefully. Eleanor's mouth went dry when she saw him. She'd always felt safe around Blaise, she'd preferred him over Draco's other friends, even rejoiced when Draco spent time with him. She'd been so fond of him. And now he was a Death Eater, now he'd sworn loyalty to the wizard who plotted the death of her parents, he was on the same side as dark wizards who were actively trying to kill everyone she loved, he'd cursed Katie Bell. She felt so afraid to be in his presence, but she would be damned if she showed it. She removed her hand from her face and looked at him straight on. Like most people, he towered over her, but she set her jaw firmly and didn't cower in his shadow. "What are you doing out here?" He asked carefully.

"I have a meeting with Dumbledore." Eleanor responded quickly, too quickly to be believable. "I have some project ideas for Hogwarts that I need his approval for. I'm just really nervous about it." She chuckled casually.

"Draco mentioned you were doing stuff like that," Blaise nodded, looking more unamused by Eleanor every second. "Speaking of, have you seen him around? I'm having trouble finding him."

Eleanor shook her head slowly, "We're going to be studying after dinner, but he didn't tell me of any other plans before that."

Blaise nodded once, he had a sinister look in his eyes. He looked menacing.

"Well, I better be off," Blaise hummed, then added after a bit of thought: "you know, it's a bit hard to believe that you are meeting with Dumbledore about all your plans without any notes at all. Extremely hard to believe." He shrugged once, gesturing to Eleanor's empty hands. "But, you're smart, if you're going to trust Dumbledore with your plans then you must be _really _sure about what you're doing." Eleanor could tell there was a threat in his voice, but she couldn't tell what his meaning was. "I'm very careful about the people I trust, if someone betrays me, they won't spend a day without regret." There it was, his clear threat. As he was walking away from her she couldn't let him think he had the upper hand.

"Did you hear about Katie Bell?" She called back in spite. Blaise slowed to a stop and turned slowly to face her. "It's really a shame. It's crazy how no one has any idea who did it."

"Quite the mystery." Blaise noted cautiously. "After what happened this summer with Lucius, I'm sure everyone is going to believe it was Draco. I hope he doesn't face any of the consequences." There was malice in his voice. Eleanor ground her teeth and glared hard down the hallway at him. Blaise smirked slightly and turned to continue walking.

Eleanor searched for something to say, something to make Blaise fearful. She had a self destructive need to make him as afraid as he was making her. She searched her brain, feeling more desperate the further down the hallway Blaise got. He was the source of so much anxiety. He was trying to get Death Eaters into the school, he was fogging Draco's brain, he was attacking people.

"You're right," Eleanor finally called out, "I do think it's all about trusting the right people, the people you surround yourself with." Blaise spun to glare at her but didn't say a word. "Just like how I trust that Draco didn't assault someone, I trust that Dumbledore knows not to look at the actions of Draco's family as a basis for judgement, I trust that Draco will protect me no matter what." Eleanor cocked her head to the side. "Who do you trust Blaise? Who is going to be on your side when accusations go flying?" Eleanor shrugged.

"Why would you ask this?" Blaise asked carefully.

"Just something I've been thinking about. These are scary times, you know? You need to put your trust in the right people. I'm happy with my choices, I think Draco is happy with his."

"You're speaking for him now?" Blaise chuckled darkly. "Like you really know him."

Eleanor's eyes popped out of her head as she let out an accidental laugh. "Oh, Merlin. I really hope you aren't insinuating that you know more about Draco than I do."

"You're just his girlfriend, you don't know what he talks to his friends about. What he talks to me about. His frustrations, his anger, his want to avenge his parents." Blaise began stalking down the hallways towards her now. Eleanor's heart was in her throat as she watched him walk slowly in her direction, looking bloodthirsty.

Eleanor was angry, angry that Draco was being used as a pawn by Blaise, angry that he was trying to exert power over him. It felt like Blaise was trying to pull him back into that dark place, and up until earlier that afternoon, they'd all been falling for it. She knew Blaise's statements weren't true, she knew Draco wasn't hungry for revenge, but Blaise was trying to create a divide, she knew it.

"For someone who is 'just his girlfriend', I sure know a lot of shit about his friends." Eleanor threatened dangerously, "People should learn not to betray me, either." Blaise's eyes went wide at the undertone of Eleanor's words and spun around, leaving the hallways permanently. Eleanor felt a gross amount of pride at watching him be fearful.

* * *

"He was so dismissive about it, like he wasn't even worried." Draco seethed, rubbing his face angrily as he sat in the Room of Requirement with Eleanor after telling her about his conversation with Dumbledore. "He didn't give a shit when I told him about Snape, he didn't care when Blaise literally tried to kill him. Does he want to die?"

"Maybe he just didn't react so he wouldn't worry you." Eleanor suggested. Draco rolled his eyes at her optimism.

"Yeah, maybe." Draco agreed reluctantly, his words didn't match what he believed.

"You did the right thing, telling him."

"I hope so."

* * *

Draco couldn't take his eyes off Eleanor the night of the Slug Club Christmas party. He usually struggled with his consistent distraction when Eleanor was in the room - and often when she wasn't - but his life had been so dark recently and seeing her looking so angelic reminded him of the bright light she brought into his life.

Hermione had helped Eleanor calm her curls, and she'd spent time making her face look airbrushed and bright. She felt almost dangerous in her long sleeve, black dress. It fell just above her knees and cut into a deep V down her front. The open back and satin material cooled her warm, excited skin. She felt like the most beautiful woman in the world when she exited the Gryffindor Common Room and saw Draco's face light up.

Harry had left earlier to meet Luna, and Hermione was waiting in the Common Room for Cormac. She wanted to be sure Ron saw her with him.

"Do we have to go to the party?" Draco asked softly, collecting Eleanor in his arms and playing softly with the material of the dress on her shoulder.

"Yes, I didn't spend this long getting ready to not go." Eleanor swatted his hand away and gave him a teasing glare. "Although, I'm not opposed to leaving early." She added in a low voice, and Draco snaked one arm around her waist and pulled her in close to him.

"You're going to drive me mad." Draco shook his head as they walked through the halls. Eleanor only smirked, satisfied and excited by the way Draco was falling over her. She'd never been the kind of girl who attracted boys all of the time. Ginny and Hermione were usually the ones being fawned over. Before Draco, she'd gone on a few dates and kissed a few boys (usually while under the influence) but no one had ever been enamored with her. To Eleanor, hearing that Draco desired her, feeling his hands all over her body, it made her feel so wanted. She didn't need attention from a lot of people, just from him.

Upon their arrival to the party, Eleanor could tell they wouldn't be there long. The food didn't even smell inviting, and everyone was schmoozing each other. Harry and Luna looked uncomfortable, and she knew that once Hermione proved her point to Ron, she would be miserable in Cormac's company.

"We'll say hello to Slughorn, loiter a bit, then leave." Draco said firmly, causing Eleanor to laugh slightly at his anticipation to bail on the party he'd invited her to.

"And stop by the kitchens to get good food," Eleanor added while looking around in disgust, "What even is that?" sheasked, pointing at an odd looking hors d'oeuvres on a serving plate. Draco chuckled and reached into his robe, pulling out a silver flask. "Contraband?" Eleanor raised her brows, excited. The pair stepped behind a curtain and took respective sips of the stinging liquid.

"Okay, let's find Slughorn and make our appearance." Draco said, handing Eleanor a mint. They wove through the crowd and eventually made their way to greet the Potions professor. Eleanor had yet to meet Slughorn and was curious about the man.

"Professor Slughorn," Draco greeted in a friendly voice, he shook hands with the older gentleman then gestured to Eleanor, "this is my girlfriend, Eleanor Cordarri."

"Cordarri, you say?" Slughorn shook Eleanor's hand and eyed her suspiciously, seemingly not convinced that she was the child of Olga and Darius, which, biologically, she wasn't. "It is so wonderful to meet someone from such an influential name. You'll have to forgive me for not recognizing you right away, you must take after your grandparents, they were before my time. Oh I was so sad to hear about your lovely parents last year, how have you been holding up?"

"It's been difficult, but I've found good friends who have been very supportive." Eleanor smiled graciously, holding tight to Draco's arm. "It's very nice to meet you, I've heard so much about you from my friends and from Draco. This party is lovely."

"Oh, thank you, thank you. Yes, it is a fun thing I like to put on for those excelling students, you know." He was a rambler, Eleanor could tell. "Your young Mr. Malfoy is an exceptional student, very driven for the future."

"Yes, I'm very proud." Eleanor smiled widely at Draco. "I've always known he would do great things."

"She's been my most loyal fan throughout the years," Draco said. The two of them had watched both sets of their parents compliment each other, and talk each other up since they were toddlers. It was easy to forget that they had both been raised in high society, but when it came to networking and being charming with superiors, their natural charisma and lightness of conversation began to peek through. The two of them felt their parents coming out as they chatted with Slughorn and gave each other a knowing glance. "And I hers."

"What is it that you do to keep busy in your final years at Hogwarts, Miss Cordarri?" Slughorn questioned.

"I've been offered the opportunity by Professor Sprout and Professor Hagrid to be a teaching assistant in both of their classes. I've also drawn up a few plans for some environmental projects around Hogwarts that I'm planning on implementing in the Spring." Eleanor answered with a bright look.

"You are two very accomplished young wizards." Slughorn seemed impressed. "Are you two planning on being a dream team after Hogwarts?" Eleanor and Draco paused and exchanged glances, post-Hogwarts had been so far from their minds that conversations about life plans had been minimal at best, but mostly non-existent. "Oh, I've pushed it, haven't I?" Slughorn asked. "You're so young, you've lots of time to figure it out."

"Well, I do know that I plan on having her in my life for a very long time." Draco squeezed her hand affectionately. Eleanor thought of the year previously, where everything had to be a secret. When they hid far away from the general public before displaying love, and when anyone asked whether they had a future together they would sneer and say that the connection between the Malfoy and Cordarri families were long standing and avoid making it personal. Now, Draco was holding her hand, keeping her body close to him, boasting about her in front of a professor. She knew the transition hadn't been easy, they'd had hard conversations and spent time apart and fought relentlessly. Draco had to stretch and grow to accept her friends and she had to be pushed out of her comfort zone to respect traditions, beliefs, and understandings that Draco held firm to.

They'd worked so hard for this joy. Eleanor knew the hard work wasn't over. They'd fought a few weeks prior and some subjects were still fragile. She knew that despite all of the work, not all of their days would be joyful, and they wouldn't always agree. But she couldn't help but feel proud of them for the overcoming of so many obstacles.

"Young love, so pure." Slughorn smiled. "Harry, my boy!" He called above the conversation of the room as Harry began strolling by, "You and Mr. Malfoy have class together, do you know Miss Cordarri?" Slughorn introduced. Eleanor and Harry shared an amused look and cracked respective smiles.

"Yes, very well, sir. Her and I have mutual family friends and spend holidays together." Harry answered as he shook Slughorn's hand in greeting.

"Oh, how lucky. So many accomplished and promising witches and wizards in one place." Slughorn beamed. "It's one of my very favorite things about teaching at Hogwarts. How long have you two been acquainted?"

"First year," Eleanor answered, "we were fast friends. With Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger as well."

"Oh, the troublemakers." Slughorn chuckled. "Your lack of rule following is legendary in the teacher's lounge. Somehow, Mr. Malfoy's name is always left out."

Draco froze for a moment, and the three students glanced between each other, unsure of how to answer. "Eleanor has only roped me in as of recently." Draco answered smoothly, a good natured laugh on his lips.

"Well hopefully they've grown out of their antics by this age and you'll avoid the infamy entirely and only reap the rewards of having such an influential young witch by your side."

"One can only hope," Draco affirmed, "if you'll excuse us, I think the pumpkin juice is calling our name." He finally conceded charmingly, Eleanor feeling excited that they were finally taking their leave.

"It was so lovely to finally have a real conversation with you, Professor Slughorn. I'm very grateful that you extended the invitation and I had the opportunity to experience this." Eleanor gushed politely, her Slytherin upbringing of schmoozing and making easy connections coming to the surface quickly. Harry furrowed his brows at her flattery, never knowing Eleanor to change her personality so easily. She shot him a fake mean look and a wink as she turned away with Draco.

"You sound like a politician's wife." Draco whispered in her ear as they wove through the crowd of people.

"Oh, Merlin," Eleanor groaned, "please don't tell me that." Draco chuckled at her response.

"Just making an observation," Draco continued, "you'd be very good at it."

"I'd make a good politician all on my own." Eleanor sniffed in fake annoyance.

"You would," Draco agreed, "but you'd hate every minute of it."

Eleanor laughed at his response. "I'd hate being a politician's wife too." She quirked a brow at him, she was worried his face would fall in disappointment.

"I know you would." Draco nodded, expressionless. All joyful teasing gone from his voice. "I know that." Draco took a deep breath and grabbed her hand to lead her towards the door. Eleanor felt butterflies filling her stomach at the idea of leaving with Draco and getting the chance to be alone with him.

The two flitted about the corridors lightly and silently, pausing every now and again to capture each other's lips on their way to the Room of Requirement. Draco had slowly begun unlacing the strings on the back of her dress. Each stop in the hallways elicited giggles from Eleanor as Draco ravaged her skin with his mouth and pulled another loop free, causing her dress to gradually slip down her shoulders.

When they reached their destination, no door appeared for them.

"Are you sure we're at the right place?" Draco asked, touching the stone wall.

"Positive." Eleanor affirmed. "Someone else must be using it," she frowned, "I can't believe we have to share our sex spot."

Draco chuckled. "Should we pay homage to our beginnings and go up to the Astronomy Tower?"

"It's going to be freezing." Eleanor pointed out.

"You like the cold," Draco reasoned.

"You don't."

"Do you have a better suggestion?" Draco crossed his arms.

"Do I sense desperation in your voice, Mr. Malfoy?" Eleanor chuckled lightly.

"Yes," Draco answered immediately, not giving his answer a second thought. Eleanor wrapped his hand with hers as she laughed softly, the sound of her tinkling bell chuckle set Draco's heart beating quickly.

"Come on," She summoned, dragging him further through the hallways. They hid in crevices when they heard the shoes of professors or prefects patrolling the halls. Draco had to hold his hand to her mouth more than once due to her nervous giggling.

Finally, she gestured to her proposed spot.

"The greenhouse?" Draco raised a suspicious brow.

"I have a key, no one patrols here and the only other person with a key is Professor Sprout and she left for Christmas holiday already." Eleanor reasoned.

"Is there any place to...like…"

"Your lack of creativity is astounding," Eleanor joked, pulling off her shoe and revealing the key to have been under the heel.

"You've been planning to come here." Draco realized.

"It's good to have a back up plan." Eleanor shrugged as she opened the door and pulled him inside. The lock clicked behind them as the humidity and the smell of sweet flowers hit Draco pleasantly. He closed his eyes and relished in the warmth and fragrance surrounding him. When he opened his eyes again, Eleanor was disappearing behind overgrown plants, pulling her sleeves down her shoulders and giving him eyes that made him want to drop to his knees.

"Ellie," He called, careful to not speak too loudly so no passerbys could hear.

"You'll have to find me." She giggled, her voice echoing strangely on the walls.

"I don't like this game." Draco grumbled, trying to listen for her footsteps.

"Have you been paying attention in Herbology?" Her voice was softly, but he could still hear it reverberating around him. "Do you know how the greenhouse is organized? I'm by the Singing Spanish Lilies, they are the cousins of the Growling Vines. Do you know the main difference?"

"One growls and one sings?" Draco guessed, walking up and down aisles of flowers, keeping an eye out for any sign of her. Eleanor laughed at his response.

"Astute observation. It's no wonder you're near the top of your class." Eleanor teased, Draco was frustrated by how far away her voice sounded. "There is one major difference between them that causes them to be planted in different regions of the greenhouse. There is an old rhyme about Singing Spanish Lilies: Most beautiful from dusk to dawn, the lilies pop out when you start to yawn."

"They need moonlight." Draco answered.

"One point to Slytherin." Eleanor called out. "Do you know where we keep the nocturnal plants?"

"Somewhere far away, probably."

Eleanor tsked somewhere in the greenhouse that Draco hadn't realized was quite this expansive. "Usually nocturnal plants burn in the sun, Devil's Snare is another. There is a contraption called a Moon Door that conceals them by day but opens at night without needing anyone's manipulation, the witch Florence Nixon invented it, she was very ahead of her time-" Eleanor was no longer being sultry and was now simply sharing facts she found interesting, which made Draco chuckle as he continued to move about the greenhouse, trying to remember where the Moon Door was.

"You're such a nerd," Draco laughed.

"Take that back, Draco Malfoy," Eleanor shouted, forgetting that they were supposed to be quiet, "you are the most intelligence oriented person I've ever met, and yes that includes Hermione, so you making fun of me for having a passion for Herbology is the most hypocritical thing I've ever heard."

"What a touchy subject for you," Draco continued to chuckle, her loud voice giving him a more accurate direction to head in. Leaves and branches brushed against his arms, and he couldn't help but understand the love Eleanor had for the plants in this room, thousands of little lives that she'd helped to create and foster into growth.

Then, above the greenery that surrounded him, he saw a bright, white flower opening towards the full moon that showed through a door in the ceiling. A smirk spread across Draco's face and he continued to move around through the branches as quietly as possible, hoping to surprise her.

"I didn't make fun of you once last year when you wrote and rewrote essay after essay to make sure it was perfect, or all of the notes you left on my essays, or when you pulled me away from a _celebration _that the whole school was present for to go _study_. I simply won't stand the disrespect." Eleanor grumbled, not knowing that Draco had snuck up behind her and was admiring her now exposed back and unpinned hair while she leaned against a bench that held pots of lilies.

"Found you," Draco murmured huskily, causing her body to jump in surprise. Her eyes were opened wide and her mouth fell open in a gasp.

"You scared me," Eleanor accused angrily, but Draco just continued to laugh as he crossed the barriers and gathered her in his arms while she playfully struggled against him. "No, no, get away from me." She laughed out, pulling at his arms and kicking about. He was so much stronger than her but he let her feel powerful by releasing his arms ever so slightly before tightening around her again. He began tickling her sides, eliciting an elated shriek of laughter. "Draco, stop it." She managed out through gasps of laughter. He loved hearing her giggles and feeling her body shake against his while they continued to be young and playful and let their cares and worries fall to the wayside.

He eventually stopped tickling, and she stopped struggling and they melted together in a kiss and stayed in each other's embrace under the moon and amongst the lilies.

* * *

**Hey everyone! **I know updates have taken slightly longer than usual, I'm feeling a little uninspired at the moment, so staying a few chapters ahead is getting harder and harder. I would love to hear what you all are thinking and feeling. Maybe it will perk me up a bit! ;)


	40. Chapter 40

**Hi all! **It has been a minute, that was totally unintentional. Life has been a little crazy, and motivation has been slight. I'm excited to get the next installment out and would really appreciate hearing your thoughts!

* * *

Eleanor and Draco awoke with a start when the Moon Door slammed shut at the first sign of sunlight in the morning. The two had found some burlap sacks that they had curled up on the night before and had apparently fallen asleep on. Eleanor was tucked under Draco's dress robe coat and her head was on his chest.

"We fell asleep." Eleanor mumbled groggily, wiping sleep from her eyes and brushing her unruly hair back.

"Yeah," Draco agreed while he stretched his neck out of the uncomfortable position he'd fallen asleep in.

"What time is it?" Eleanor asked. Draco reached into his pocket and looked at the pocketwatch Eleanor had gotten him the year prior for Christmas.

"Eight," he responded in a bit of a panic, "the train home leaves in an hour."

"Shit," Eleanor burst out, scrambling to her feet and pulling her dress so that it was correctly adjusted, "will you tie it back up?"

"I wish I didn't have to." Draco sighed as he stood and began kissing Eleanor's exposed shoulder.

"We don't have time for this." Eleanor hurried him along. Draco chuckled and tied up the back of her dress and handed her his dress robe coat to cover her more for the walk back to the Common Room. He quickly rebuttoned his own shirt and adjusted his cleaned the sacks that they had drug out the night before and relocked the greenhouse before scurrying through the hallways, hoping not to be seen.

"I'll see you on the train," Eleanor gave Draco a swift kiss and a smile before rushing up the stairs, covering her dress in his robe, hoping it made her look less suspicious, but not sure if that was actually true.

When she finally tumbled through the portrait hole, she was surprised to find her friends already on the couches with their luggages packed and ready to go. Eleanor gave them a sheepish smile and continued clutching the robe closed.

"Where have you been, Eleanor?" Hermione asked with a ghost of a grin.

"Went for a walk this morning." Eleanor supplied quickly. Harry rolled his eyes and pointedly looked away.

"Walk of shame," Ron laughed loudly as Ginny tugged on the robe and revealed her dress from the night before underneath.

"Is...is that dirt...in your hair?" Ginny asked. "And a leaf?"

"Eleanor, you didn't…" Hermione crossed her arms, a laugh clearly about to escape her lips. "The greenhouse?"

"Dirt and leaves can come from all sorts of places." Eleanor pointed out, but defeat was clear in her voice.

"You hooked up with Malfoy in the greenhouse?" Ron shouted out, whooping with laughter. Harry continued to turn pink but was chuckling as well.

"I'm the only one who has a key, it just made sense." Eleanor tried to rationalize with them, but was starting to laugh at the thought of it as well.

"Oh my god, I'll never be able to sit in Herbology ever again." Ginny muttered softly.

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, they didn't actually have sex. They just snogged." Hermione waved off. Eleanor turned a deep shade of red as she continued to push by them to change her clothes and gather her holiday items.

"Hermione, look at her face, they definitely had sex." Ginny called out.

"No they didn't, right Eleanor? Eleanor!" Hermione called after her friend, but Eleanor was too far up the stairs to respond.

* * *

Eleanor tried to ignore the horrible pain in her neck from sleeping in such an uncomfortable position as she sat in the compartment on the train with Ron, Harry, Hermione, and Draco. Draco seemed nervous as he ran his palms up and down his legs and avoided looking at the rest of them. Eleanor was confused as she watched him, unsure of what was making him so uncomfortable.

"Malfoy, what do you know about Blaise Zabini?" Harry finally asked, nodding towards Draco. Hermione whacked his shoulder immediately. "Ow, it's a valid question Hermione."

"We go a long way back," Draco answered, his nervous composure shifting to a guarded one when being questioned. "Why?"

"He showed up at the Slug Club Christmas party after you both went off to the greenhouse." Harry answered. Draco's eyes bulged out and shot to Eleanor.

"I didn't tell them about the greenhouse, they just found out."

"How do they always just find shit out?" Draco grumbled and rubbed his eyes in slight frustration for a moment. "Did he cause any trouble, what was he doing?"

"He was just hiding out in the curtains,he said he was just trying to crash the party, and then Snape came and dragged him out." Harry explained.

"And you undoubtedly followed them." Draco was nearly sneering, but kept most of the trained malice out of his voice and tried to remind himself that they were all on the same side. "What did they say?"

"Nothing explicitly incriminating, but Snape basically told him to stop being an idiot and just get his work done. I was just wondering if Blaise is the type to…" Harry trailed off, unsure of how to ask the question that was on his mind.

Draco sucked in a deep breath and looked out the window of the compartment. He felt a lot of things. He felt guilt and shame knowing he'd kept that information from Harry who was in obvious danger, knowing he'd told Eleanor to keep it a secret to protect his ties to his old life. He felt grief over his old life, even for all of its flaws. He was comfortable then, not particularly happy, but he had a good family standing, and he knew he could have had anything he wanted.

He stopped his thought process there and shook his head. Because he hadn't had everything he had wanted. His relationship with Eleanor had been rocky at best, and toxic at worst. His relationship with his parents had been based on fear, and his relationship with his friends had been based on history as well fear. He had let fear and resentment rule his life for so long, and he didn't want to do that anymore. He needed to actively make changes. It wasn't enough to simply not associate with Death Eaters, he had to be actively against it.

One of Draco's biggest obstacles was not being able to apologize to Eleanor. He'd always been jealous of her ease at admitting her mistakes and overcoming them. He sat in front of her and her friends and he felt like a fraud. He'd been benefiting from their trust without earning it, without deserving it. He clenched his jaw, he knew what he needed to do and fought against his natural instincts to do it.

"I think I owe you all an apology." He finally said, so quietly everyone in the compartment thought they were imagining it. Even Eleanor, who knew how good Draco was, was admittedly shocked to hear those words. He'd only apologized to her once, when he'd lost his temper and yelled unforgivingly at her a year ago while they had their argument in her parent's bedroom. It was never something she resented, but it was also not something she expected from him. He made it up to her in other ways and it was something she'd grown to expect. Hearing his words leave his mouth left her intrigued, shocked, and very proud.

"I've been skating by hoping that my love for El was enough of a penance for everything I've done to you all, and it's become increasingly clear to me that it isn't. You all began trusting me because Eleanor asked you too and because I stopped purposefully hurting you all and I'm grateful, but I also feel like I need to earn this trust on my own." Draco didn't look at any of them directly, just stared at his hands clasped in his lap. His voice remained low and almost submissive as he spoke. Eleanor knew this was hard for him and she wanted to reach out to comfort him, but something told her that he wanted to stand on his own as he did this. It was his choice to say these things.

"I know I won't ever be able to go back and remember every terrible thing I did and said when we were younger, so I hope an overarching apology will do." He chuckled nervously here. "But Weasley, I'm sorry for all of the times I made fun of you and your family. I was a spoiled brat growing up, which isn't an excuse, but I was trained to look down on people and that...that isn't fair, and most certainly isn't right. You're richer and more accomplished than I am in a lot of ways, in ways that really count. A lot of my cruel words were born from jealousy and I'm sorry." Ron looked pale and shocked at the words coming out of Draco's mouth, he simply gave a single nod in acceptance, unsure of what else to say.

"Potter, I've made a lot of angry comments about you and your family too. I took your lack of friendship to me as a snub and your affection for El as competition and I acted out really unfairly. I was jealous of a lot of things and I let that jealousy rule my life for a long time. I'm sorry for that."

"Jealous of my life?" Harry repeated, incredulous that someone would be envious of him.

"Believe me, now that I see the circumstances up close I know that you've seen and dealt with a lot of shit and I'm not envious of that, but I do want to help." Draco rubbed his face and finally looked directly at Hermione, he hadn't lifted his gaze for anyone else. "And Granger-" He stopped himself, seeming to want to be even more gentle and sincere for this one "Hermione, I was especially cruel to you. I called you awful names and looked down on you because of your blood status, mocked you and made threats. That was all wrong. So wrong. Before the war started I didn't really understand the weight my words carried, and I was ignorant of how much it can affect people. Again, that isn't an excuse, I don't want that behavior to be defended, but I want you to know that I know where it came from and I'm moving away from those beliefs. You're everything that I want to be in terms of success and I hope that you'll allow me to learn from you. I'm so sorry."

The four of them stared at Draco in disbelief. No one had heard Draco speak that long and that regretfully about anything, not even Eleanor.

"And El," he grabbed her hand softly, "I don't think I'll ever apologize enough times for the hell I put you through and I'll spend forever trying to make it up to you." He sighed and straightened his back. "So, because I'm actively helping you and moving away from old habits, rather than passively not doing anything, I do need to tell you that Blaise is a Death Eater. He told me at the beginning of this year, and I've been keeping tabs on him. I asked Eleanor not to tell you all because I didn't want to give you more of a reason not to trust me, but to be honest, he surprised me and terrified me when he cursed Katie Bell. I thought he was just spying, I didn't realize what he was capable of. I immediately told everything I knew to Dumbledore, who seemed wholly unconcerned about the issue."

Harry rubbed his chin in thought. "Do you know anything about Snape?"

"Nothing that I haven't told you." Draco responded. "I know my mother heard my Aunt say that Peter Pettigrew was living with her until Snape returned from Hogwarts like I said over the summer, and him talking with Blaise makes me suspicious, but he'd never given me any reasons not to trust him otherwise."

"Thank you, Draco." Hermione smiled warmly at him from across the compartment. "We're happy to have your help. And your apologies mean a lot."

Draco remained quiet the rest of the train ride, mentally exhausted from owning up to years of mistakes and wrongdoings, but he felt more comfortable than ever around Harry, Ron, and Hermione because he felt like he had earned his spot there.

When they all finally arrived at the platform, Eleanor excitedly hopped off the train ahead of everyone else and into Remus' arms. Sirius sat, in dog form, next to him and looked at the train in anticipation of seeing Harry.

"Hello, my love." Remus whispered into her hair as he held onto her tightly. He felt whole with her around and was overjoyed to be holding his daughter in his arms again. Eleanor pulled away and smiled up at him. Then patted Sirius on the head affectionately. "How are you?" Remus asked, "How was the term?"

"Good, all good." Eleanor responded. "I'm so happy to see you." Remus chuckled and wrapped her in another hug.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco came walking up behind them and greeted Remus and Sirius in amusement. Draco gave a formal handshake with Remus, but said very little.

"The twins are already at the Castle, you can bring Molly and Arthur over later. Unfortunately, Bill, Charlie, and Percy won't be joining us." Remus informed. Eleanor had invited the Weasleys to stay at Cordarri Castle over the holidays. Attacks on the Order were becoming more commonplace, and Eleanor didn't want that worry hanging over anyone's head. She loved filling her home with the people she loved, and she had more than enough room for everyone.

"I'll be there for Christmas Dinner and will stay until we go back." Hermione promised, giving everyone a swift hug for departure - even Draco- before rushing to hug her parents on the platform. This made Draco stiffen and turn slightly pink and earned raised eyebrows from Remus.

"What happened this term?" He muttered softly to Sirius who whined in response.

* * *

Upon arrival at the Castle, she saw that Remus and Sirius had brought some Christmas decorations from Grimmauld Place and had attempted to start sprucing the place up for the holiday season. Eleanor was truly touched by the gesture, and put a smile on her face while she swallowed the critiques of how she felt her home should look and reminded herself that she had chosen to share her life with people and that old traditions weren't a necessity in this new chapter of her life.

Draco put a gentle hand on her shoulder when no one was looking, having seen her false smile that no one else could see through. She smiled gratefully at him and took her leave to bring Molly and Arthur to the Castle and directed them to their room before she rummaged through the attic to find her family's proper collection of Christmas decor.

"So Eleanor," Fred's voice popped from behind a corner as Eleanor carried a box of decorations down the hallway. She jumped in surprise but smiled at him, she didn't realize how much she'd missed the twins and their antics during this term.

"Are we to understand the greenhouse is off limits during our stay here?" George continued.

"No, why?" Eleanor asked, setting the box down and putting her hands on her hips. "Did Sirius do something to my plants?" She continued.

"No, no. We just wouldn't want to walk in on anything...distasteful." Fred answered. Eleanor's cheeks flared up.

"Who told you?" She demanded, earning a cacophony of laughter from the twins. "Was it Ron or Ginny?"

"You think Harry wouldn't tell us?"

"Are you saying the Weasleys are blabber mouths?"

"Harry would rather pretend I'm not sleeping with his childhood enemy so I don't think he would talk about it willingly." Eleanor answered with her arms crossed.

"You're right, it was Ginny." Fred gave in with laughter. George joined in mockingly.

"You two live above a joke shop in a shared flat, so I'm sure you have embarrassing places you've had sex too" Eleanor huffed. "And if anyone else in this house hears about it, I will personally find out and exploit every one of your less-than-savory moments. You're mum would love to hear them I'm sure."

"Oh, Eleanor, you aren't devious enough for that little plot." Fred hummed.

"Do you want to take that chance, though?" Eleanor raised a brow. "I'm serious, any hint to Remus and Sirius, and you'll be very sorry."

"Yes ma'am." George gave a mock salute and reached down to pick up the box of decorations Eleanor had set down. "Also, do you have any information on this Lavender Brown who has been spending an awful lot of time with our brother? You've always been a wealth of information."

"You mean Ron isn't boasting about her himself?" Eleanor sniffed, "That's odd."

"Come now, Eleanor, you have no space to have an attitude about someone else's love interest." Fred admonished good naturedly. Eleanor ground her teeth slightly, but ended up chuckling along with the two of them.

"Well the details on Lavender depends on who you ask," Eleanor answered, "According to Ron, it's true love but she is a little clingy, according to Harry it's a purely physical and Ron is really liking the attention, according to Hermione she's manipulative and also stupid all at once."

"What's your opinion on it?" Fred asked.

"I think there are better people for Ron, but he's also able to make his own decisions and he'll figure it out."

"What about Ginny and Dean?" George put in.

"I thought they broke up," Fred continued.

"I think there are better people for her, too." Eleanor shrugged with a smirk.

"Are you suggesting matchmaking? Because we can make that happen." George said, causing a smile to break out on Eleanor's face.

"I think they will find their way without meddling, don't you?"

"Oh, Eleanor, don't deny us our greatest love," George started.

"Which is definitely meddling." Fred finished.

"I'll keep my eye out for any opportunities of meddling if it will keep your smart remarks at bay." Eleanor rolled her eyes. She led the twins to the front parlor to drop the box of decorations. She was surprised to see Sirius sitting in the room already, he seemed to be telling a story from his time at Hogwarts. Harry and Draco both sat, both engrossed in his every word. Eleanor smiled and sat next to Draco on the loveseat. He automatically put his arm around her shoulders, but didn't break eye contact with an amused Sirius.

"So, after we'd been in the woods for about two hours, we were absolutely panicked. We couldn't find Moony anywhere, we thought we were late and that he was off alone. We felt awful, so eventually Wormtail changed back and began calling out to him. Me and Prongs both decided to stay in our animal forms because we were larger and could sustain a furry surprise if he sprung out at us, and Wormtail is just screaming for him, almost in tears, and where does Moony come from? Behind the damn tree, not a werewolf at all, just regular Moony." Sirius stopped to laugh for a moment. "We were in shock, we'd been searching for him for so long and there he was just laughing away at our panic." Harry, Draco, and the twins chuckled at the story.

"I was tired of you lot always asking when the next full moon was, it wasn't that hard to check it yourselves, but you never did." Remus spoke up from the entrance of the room.

"Well, we never fell for that again." Sirius laughed. "I didn't finish a Potions essay because I was out all night worrying about you."

"You wouldn't have done that Potions essay anyway." Remus waved off with good humor.

"D-do you have any more stories? About my mum and dad?" Harry seemed embarrassed to ask for it, but Sirius just gave him a knowing look and a soft nod.

"Harry, I have so many stories about your mum and dad. And I am so excited to share every single one of them with you." Sirius smiled.

It felt good to be home.


	41. Chapter 41

After a full day of eating and catching up and observing the work Remus and Sirius had done in the gardens, and decorating under the watchful eye of Eleanor, the guests of Cordarri Castle began to trickle off to bed one by one. Molly and Arthur turned in first, then Ron, then the twins, Ginny tried to stay as late as possible, but eventually she left with drooping eyes, then finally Draco left the kitchen, giving Eleanor a kiss on the forehead before leaving the room and retreating to bed. This left Sirius, Remus, Harry, and Eleanor seated in the parlor. All exchanged excited, happy smiles at the prospect of them being together again; their little, happy, mismatched family.

"Draco seems...different." Sirius noted softly.

"He'd definitely be burned off of your mother's wall - you'd be proud." Eleanor responded happily to which everyone chuckled.

"He actually apologized today." Harry informed the two older men.

"For what?" Remus inquired.

"For...everything I guess. Everything he's done and said since our first year."

"Well, I hope change follows these apologies," Remus began diplomatically, "otherwise it's just empty words."

"That's the thing, I think he changed before he apologized. He turned in his best friend to Dumbledore, and even before that he tried to stop Umbridge from discovering Dumbledore's Army, and gives us any information he has about Death Eaters." Harry tried to explain, causing a wide smile to break on Eleanor's face.

"You like him," She observed, "after all this time, you finally like him."

"I respect him." Harry corrected with a chuckle, "and I only respect him because he is different from how he was before, not because I'm seeing what you saw all along. He was still a bad guy when you were fighting tirelessly for him."

Eleanor rolled her eyes and smiled at Harry. "Well obviously not all bad."

"No, I'll give you that, not all bad."

"I'm happy to hear that things are smoothing themselves out," Sirius nodded affectionately at the two teenagers, "we'll need as many people on our team as possible."

"Sirius," Remus warned in a low voice, "it's their first night." Harry looked as though he wanted more information as to what Sirius was alluding to but Eleanor quickly stepped in to change the subject to something more cheery than the war looming over their heads.

"Speaking of teammates, I was under the impression I'd be seeing more of Tonks throughout the duration of this break." Eleanor noticed. Apparently that was the wrong thing to say to ease tensions in the room as both Sirius and Remus got extremely stiff and stared at the floor. "What? Did you all have a falling out or something?"

"Something like that." Sirius muttered, glowering at Remus from across the room. "Moony denies himself anything that makes him happy, and Tonks has now fallen into that category."

"Ah, so you told Eleanor of your matchmaking scheme." Remus realized, raising his brows at Sirius.

"And Harry." Sirius responded, Remus rolled his eyes in an over exaggerated fashion.

"I don't deny myself anything that makes me happy considering I'm here with all of you, and you make me happy."

"Are you going to tell her your reasoning or are-"

"Sirius," Remus snapped sharply, "enough." His face turned slightly red due to embarrassment and frustration.

"You don't need to justify it, Remus." Eleanor said softly, "I just want you to be happy."

Remus relaxed his shoulders as he looked at his daughter and smiled gently. He saw so much of her mother in her, it was almost like he was transferred back to all of the time he spent with Nora in the year they were together. He couldn't get his daughter's hopes up at the thought of being reunited with her birth mother when he wasn't sure he would survive the war to come.

"I'm very happy." He assured.

* * *

Once everyone retreated to their beds, Eleanor tiptoed into Draco's room. There was a small part of her that was worried about the embarrassment that would ensue if she was found there, she was fairly certain she wouldn't be. All she wanted to do was sleep beside Draco in an actual bed, not on a sack of soil.

"Hi," Eleanor whispered softly as she crawled under the covers into his arms. After spending the summer living in this room, Draco had customized it a bit. There were Slytherin wall hangings, drawers and dressers filled with his things, and his bedding from home that he'd brought with him as he jumped around from home to home over the summer. Eleanor was happy he felt comfortable enough to breathe and relax in Cordarri Castle.

"Hi," Draco mumbled sleepily in response. He didn't open his eyes but he pulled her close to him and nuzzled his face into her neck.

"I'm going to sleep here if that's okay." Eleanor informed, relaxing into his embrace.

"More than okay." Draco smiled groggily. Eleanor wrapped her arms and legs around his body and quickly drifted into a comfortable, and happy night of sleep.

* * *

Draco woke before her in the morning and was pleasantly surprised to see Eleanor next to him. He'd fallen back asleep so quickly after she'd joined him that he'd barely registered her presence there for the remainder of the night. Judging from the light barely streaming through his window, he figured it was still very early in the morning, still a little before sunrise. In the night, Eleanor had detached herself from him and slept on her back with her hands thrown carelessly above her head. Draco smiled as he sat up in bed and admired her sleeping form.

He stayed that way for a few minutes before Eleanor began to stir, as if sensing the eyes that were on her. She blinked a few times and stretched before smiling up at him.

"Good morning," She smiled happily and rolled over onto her side. "Sleep well?"

"I always do when I'm next to you," Draco replied charmingly, "or honestly, I could have just slept so well because the night before I slept on a sack of dirt."

Eleanor chuckled at that and rubbed sleep from her eyes. "It's early," she noted, glancing out the window by Draco's bed, "do you think anyone's awake?"

"I haven't heard anyone walking around." Draco answered, then caught Eleanor's eyes playfully.

Before either of them could say a word, Draco had pinned Eleanor to the bed and began kissing up and down her neck, sometimes venturing to the collar of his t-shirt that she dorned, but never quite far enough.

Eleanor wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer to her, her legs snaking around his waist to draw their hips together. They silently agreed to ignore the smells of morning breath while their lips pressed together in hungry, open-mouthed kisses.

They wanted each other desperately.

Draco's hands moved beneath her shirt and his warm hands explored her exposed skin only moments before his mouth began to follow suit. Eleanor's breath was coming out in rasps of anticipation while Draco took his time dragging his lips across her body. She began wiggling out of her sleep shorts beneath him and he chuckled low at her impatience, but didn't put off what she wanted much longer. The quiet morning hours would wane, and they would be surrounded by people for the remainder of the day, they didn't want to put off their satisfaction any longer.

They moved together in rhythm, slow and purposeful. They were completely lost in each other as their breath grew heavier and louder the more their speed increased. The heavy breathing mixed with the euphoria of being together in their own bed caused them to block out the world.

Even the soft knock that was quickly followed by the door swinging open.

"Hey Mal - oh shit!" Harry's voice started soft then ended in a bit of a shout. His voice stalled after catching sight of the actions of Eleanor and Draco. Eleanor covered her face in her arms and rolled away from the door and out from under Draco. Draco collapsed from his hands to his elbows and rested his forehead on his forearm in frustration, embarrassment, and a slight attempt to shield Eleanor behind him.

It took Harry a few seconds too long to start closing the door, and in that time Draco gathered that not only was Harry in the hallway, but Ron, Ginny, Fred, and George were as well. All bundled in winter clothes with their brooms in hand.

"I didn't see anything." Harry swore, while covering his face. It was true, it would be surprising if any of them saw any part of their naked bodies considering they were still under the covers for the most part, and Draco was doing a good job of shielding the now completely red Eleanor, but their actions had been clear enough.

"What do you want?" Draco asked.

"Does it matter?" Eleanor squeaked from behind him, "Get out!"

"What's going on here?" Sirius' voice came walking down the hallway.

"No," Eleanor groaned as she slithered further down the covers, fully submerging herself in Draco's bed and willing herself completely invisible. Harry closed the door at Sirius' arrival, but the conversation could still be heard perfectly clear inside the bedroom and the damage had already been done.

"Why are you all outside Draco's room?" Sirius asked. Eleanor held her breath, she prayed her friends could lie and spare her further humiliation.

"We were gonna ask him to play Quidditch with us." Fred supplied after too long of a pause. Draco and Eleanor didn't breathe as they strained to hear the muffled voices. Sirius wasn't fooled for a second.

"Is Eleanor in there?" He asked. Despite the fact that they all answered 'no', not a single one of them sounded convincing. There was a single rap on the door, "I'll see you two at breakfast." Sirius called, and the whole lot of them shuffled away.

Draco and Eleanor were completely frozen in their positions, afraid to move or speak. Eleanor kept her face covered in mortification. All of her friends had just seen her pinned to the bed while being fucked silly by her boyfriend. And one of the two adults in her life knew about it and was certain to tell her father. And she still had to host an army of people for the next two weeks. Her heart hammered loudly in her chest due to the great embarrassment she was feeling. It was one thing to _know _you're best friend and childhood enemy were having sex, it was entirely another to _witness _it. Eleanor felt completely sure that her relationship with her friends was now damaged beyond repair.

"Hey, they wanted to play Quidditch with me, that was nice of them." Draco finally broke the silence quietly.

"Shut up, Draco." Eleanor groaned, rolling over to smack him on the arm while still hiding her face in one hand. "Why don't you lock your fucking door?"

"You're the one who came in here last night," Draco pointed out, "you should have locked it."

"I hope you know we are never having sex again." Eleanor growled out, still hidden beneath her hands.

"Okay, I'm sure you'll hold out really well on that front." He shot back sarcastically and kissed her hair before finally rising out of the bed. He tossed the clothes she had been wearing at her and began dressing himself.

"You're eager to join them?" Her voice raised in a high pitch as she sat up in the bed and finally uncovered her face.

"The longer we are in here, the more suspicious we are." Draco responded.

"Suspicious?" She repeated, incredulous. "There is nothing to be suspicious of. They literally saw you on top of me, pounding away."

"You make it sound so unromantic." Draco sighed playfully.

"I don't see why you aren't paralyzed in fear right now. You give them one apology and suddenly you think they'll eat out of the palm of your hand." Eleanor sniffed, causing Draco to chuckle at her bitterness.

"It's only awkward if you let it be, love." Draco gave her a small smile. He couldn't let on that his heart was hammering out of control and that he was terrified that the good favor he'd fought for would now be down the drain. He had to be strong and help Eleanor overcome the mortification she was feeling. "I'll go get you some actual clothes from your room, go wash your face." Draco suggested. "Then we'll go down and start a random conversation and not address it, then it will just go away."

Eleanor followed his suggestion and washed her face with cool water, hoping to calm the redness that lingered. She couldn't believe they just waltzed on into the room, she couldn't believe she didn't lock it the night before, she couldn't believe she thought a quick morning session with Draco in a house full of all the people she would never want to walk in on her having sex would be a good idea. But Draco had a good plan, just avoid it like the plague and hopefully it would all blow over.

Draco brought a pair of leggings and one of his old emerald sweaters that she'd adopted into the bathroom for her to change into.

"I feel like wearing one of your sweaters would not be a good look at this moment." Eleanor said.

"This is mine?" Draco asked, looking at the shirt in confusion. "Oh, I guess it is. They won't be able to tell." He assured her.

Once she was changed, Eleanor stood at the door for several minutes, staring at the handle.

"I'm not doing it." She finally decided. "I'm going to stay up here forever. I'll come down in my casket."

"You're being overdramatic," Draco said calmly, "they want to forget about it just as much as you do."

Draco all but had to force her down the stairs but they eventually descended into the kitchen. Eleanor kept her chin high in pride, but kept her eyes on the ground to avoid any sort of connection.

"Wearing his sweater? Real ballsy move, Eleanor." Fred announced loudly as she entered the room.

"Legendary." George agreed.

"You don't need to announce you had sex by wearing his clothes, Eleanor, we literally all saw it." Ron added with a guffaw.

"Shut up, Weasley," Draco threatened in a fashion eerily similar to their previous years of schooling, "I know I'm not the only one to have seen your legendary pair of ghostly pale ass cheeks pressed against a tower window, so I'd be careful who you decide to poke fun at."

The room went silent for a moment, everyone unsure of how Draco's comment, his new skin in the game of affectionate teasing among the group, would be received. Then everyone erupted in laughter, including Ron.

"So spinning it around on Ron works?" Draco murmured quietly to a very grateful Eleanor while everyone was lost in laughter.

"Only some of the time, but yeah that was a smart move." Eleanor chuckled a little and squeezed his hand in gratitude.

Then Sirius, Remus, Molly, and Arthur entered the kitchen. "What's so funny in here?" Remus asked lightly, looking as though he had absolutely no idea of the goings on of the morning.

"I'm sure we wouldn't understand the antics of the young anymore, Moony." Sirius answered with a bit of a smile, then gave Eleanor a knowing glance. With any luck, Remus wouldn't have to know.

* * *

Though the general topic of conversation among the young population at Cordarri Castle had shifted from Eleanor and Draco's early morning to delight to Ginny's recent ex-boyfriend, Dean, and Ron's unfortunately current girlfriend Lavender, the position in which the young couple had been caught was still the first thing Hermione was informed of upon her arrival to Christmas Dinner several days later.

"You two are being safe, aren't you?" Hermione inquired of Eleanor when the jokes ceased and the audience of her embarrassment left.

Eleanor rolled her eyes at Hermione's motherly worry and nodded. "Extremely. I don't want any blonde babies running around the castle any time soon."

"I just feel like we're so young," Hermione fretted, mostly to herself, with furrowed brows and pursed lips.

"You can say that you don't like it, 'Mione." Eleanor said, putting a hand on her friend's shoulder.

"I'm not a prude, and I really do recognize how much Draco has grown," Hermione heaved a breath, Eleanor could feel her 'but' hanging in the air, "I just feel like it is so risky when there are so many weird, ominous plans involving your child and Voldemort that we don't fully understand. I just worry."

"I know you do, I worry too."

"Cleary not that much." Hermione returned sarcastically with a good natured smile. "I just don't want to have to watch you go through something painful again."

Eleanor gave her friend a long hug while getting a creeping, anxious feeling that something was coming for her happiness.

* * *

**Hi all!** Sorry for the bit of delay on posting. I'll be honest, I've been feeling a bit uninspired as of late. I'm currently going back and rereading a lot of this story, trying to find the voice and love I had embedded in this work at the beginning and it's taking me a little bit to get back rolling like I was. Please let me know if you're still enjoying it, or if there is something not really working anymore, or something that is missing. I want to do the story I started justice, and I might need my reader's help making sure that happens.


	42. Chapter 42

All of the returning Hogwarts students boarded the Hogwarts Express in early January with a new energy to push through until the summer. Even Hermione and Draco, who relished in learning and thrived in the Hogwarts environment, were looking forward to a summer spent on the lake back at Cordarri Castle. For most of them, it would be their last summer of freedom before real, adult life set in.

Harry was hesitant to commit to the excitement his friends were feeling. With every new meeting he had with Dumbledore, his hopes of finishing out his Hogwarts career normally withered away.

"Dumbledore will want you here for your last year, Harry." Hermione said assuringly when Harry brought up his worries to the group one evening. He seemed rather unconvinced.

"You heard from the Ministry internship yet, Malfoy?" Harry changed the subject quickly, readjusting himself, discomfort and fear of the future clear on his face. Eleanor wanted to reach out and give her friend a gentle hand of comfort, and was surprised and happy to watch Ginny do it first.

Draco watched Eleanor's slight smile at her friends in front of her. He was still getting used to the feeling of having friends who were outwardly supportive of each other. He felt like a fool for thinking Eleanor was the only person in the world who cared about others in such a tender way. They were all like that. Harry, who had sworn to hate him when they were 11, was now casually asking about his plans for the future. Draco shook the feeling of being an imposter off of his shoulders and tried to remember that he had earned his place among them.

"Not yet, I'm hoping to know by Easter Break." Draco answered, "I don't know if I'll take it if I do get it, though."

Eleanor did a double take and stared intently at Draco in shock. "This is the first I'm hearing of this."

"I know how much you hate it so…"

"No, no," Eleanor began waving her hands frantically, "I want you to follow your dreams!"

Draco began laughing lightly at her panic. "I'm fucking with you." He chuckled, promoting a laugh from everyone in the group, while earning a smack on the shoulder from Eleanor. "It isn't because of you, it's just, well, it's kind of a shit show there right now, isn't it?"

"I hate to break it to you, Malfoy, but it has always been like that." Ron put in.

"Your dad works for the Ministry." Draco pointed out.

"Yeah, so did yours. That means we both should know this pretty well." Ron shot back. Ron had been finding a bit of good humor in banter with Draco now that neither of them were insulting the other. He found he could be a bit harsher with Draco without hurting his feelings, and still earning a laugh from his audience. He would never admit that he was beginning to like having him around.

"Well, I had no idea it was so corrupt. Our fathers have had very different experiences."

"Wonder why that is…" Ron mused, stroking his chin in faux contemplation. Draco turned slightly pink, realizing that what he had patronized Ron for throughout the majority of their childhood was exactly the same thing that Ron's father dealt with in the workplace. He felt a pit of shame start deep in his stomach when he thought of how similar he was to his father. How easy it had been for him to follow a pattern of hatred and misunderstanding and inequality.

"I didn't realize adults also gave a shit about that stuff…" Draco trailed off in embarrassment, looking at the ground.

"Where do you think you learned it all?" Ron asked, humor clear in his voice. He didn't want Draco to feel bad, or accuse him of being an awful person just because his father was.

Draco forced a chuckle, but didn't feel amused in the slightest. Eleanor kept her gaze focused on him, as if the longer she stared at his profile, the better she would be able to understand his brain. However, his skull did not open up and reveal all of his inner workings under her watchful eye. That was something that still frustrated her about Draco; she was certain he was more open and honest with her about his emotions than he was with anyone else, but she still felt that there was so much she did not know.

"I'm tired," Eleanor announced suddenly, bringing Draco out of his thoughtful trance as his eyes flew up to meet hers, "and it is painfully obvious that absolutely no studying is going to be happening in the library tonight." She gestured to all of their books which were sprawled on the table without a page having been turnt in over an hour. "I'll walk you back to the Slytherin dorms?" She requested quietly of Draco.

"How emasculating," Draco chuckled a little, but collected his books alongside his girlfriend.

"Don't be so old fashioned," Eleanor chided good naturedly, "see you all back in the Common Room." Eleanor gave everyone a bit of a wave before taking Draco's hand in her own.

"Have a good snog!" Ginny called after them, which earned a holler of laughter from her brother. Without looking back, Eleanor stuck her middle finger up at them, but chuckled nonetheless.

The couple walked in silence for a bit, strolling slowly and taking their time. Eleanor was not leading him to the Slytherin dormitories, he soon realized. She was walking towards the greenhouse. Draco cracked a small smile.

When they returned to Hogwarts after the holidays Eleanor had been granted a small office space inside the greenhouse, similar to Professor Sprout's office. It was also used as a propagation room, and extra storage, but Eleanor spruced it up with an old desk, some lanterns, and even a small cot that Dobby had found for her without asking any questions about why she needed it. She'd covered it in throw pillows and blankets and made it look like a comfortable seating area for guests, or for her own reading purposes.

Her friends could scarcely look in the direction of her office during Herbology with the knowledge of what the cot was usually used for. Eleanor would shrug off their disproving comments and glances and say that it logically made the most sense and that she always had an excuse handy if Professor Sprout ever came to the greenhouse in the middle of the night. 'Just finishing up some work, and Draco kept me company so he could walk me back because Peeves has been really getting on my nerves recently,' she would tell them.

Hermione always rolled her eyes at this.

"You aren't tired," Draco accused mockingly as Eleanor searched her bag for the greenhouse key. Eleanor smirked.

"I love that you're friends with my friends, but sometimes I just want you all to myself." Eleanor said simply. "Sorry if that is selfish."

"You aren't sorry."

Eleanor opened her mouth to respond when the two heard uneven footsteps walking down the hall towards them. Eleanor quickly got her excuse ready for whichever professor or prefect that was approaching the young couple, who looked like they had been caught utterly red handed.

"I always wondered where the two of you fucked." An unamused laugh came from the shadows as the person walked closer.

"Blaise?" Draco asked almost immediately, though he couldn't be totally sure it was his childhood friend approaching. The tenor of the voice sounded like Blaise, but his tone sounded different, and his words didn't match something Blaise would say even on his worst day.

"The greenhouse? Really, Draco? That's...I mean, wow - very primal of you." It became clear that it was Blaise as he entered the light, and clapped in a mock congratulations with absolutely no rhythm. He was walking slightly slanted and his glassy eyes were half closed.

"Is he drunk?" Eleanor asked Draco quietly, Draco nodded once in confirmation, which seemed to irritate the already belligerent Blaise even further.

"I can hear you talk about me!" He yelled and lunged forward, but wobbled on his feet and grabbed onto Draco's shoulders for support. Eleanor instinctively took a step back and Draco blocked her protectively. Eleanor's heart broke when she saw Blaise's eyes fill with tears that didn't ever make it to his cheeks. "I can hear when everyone talks about me." He continued, his eyes darted around frantically.

"No one is talking about you, Blaise." Draco told his friend softly, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. Blaise smacked his hand away furiously. Draco sent his hands up in surrender, but his eyes grew dark and his jaw clenched in anger.

"I hear it. I hear everything. I hear everyone talking about how I'm not living up to my potential." He spit some bile onto the stone walkway. "My professors are talking about how my marks are slipping, how I'm 'so angry' now. Do they even realize how powerful I am? Who I'm working with?"

"Who you're working _for_?" Draco corrected snidely. "You aren't his partner, you're his slave."

Blaise's eyes seemed to turn black and he lunged at Draco a second time. "You don't know anything." He spat out, Draco was able to push him back easily because of how off balance the overindulgence of alcohol made him. "He gave me an important job. He trusted me with something he couldn't trust anyone else with. And you want to know the best part? The part of it I love the most?" Blaise's breath came out in raging heaves. "It was supposed to be your job. But the Malfoys fell from grace. All of you are failures. While your idiot father sits in Azkaban, and your mother runs cowardly away, and while you fuck your blood traitor girlfriend and cozy up to Harry Potter; I become more powerful than you can even imagine."

"Aren't you just fixing a piece of furniture?" Eleanor couldn't stop herself from spitting. Draco didn't have time to even roll his eyes at her terrible timing before Blaise reached out and smacked her across the cheek. Eleanor took a step back in surprise but proudly refused to hold a hand to her stinging face. She didn't want to give Blaise the satisfaction of knowing it hurt.

Draco swiftly put both hands on Blaise's chest and shoved him to the ground with great force. His hand was on his wand in an instant and he held it to Blaise's throat menacingly. "The Dark Lord doesn't want you dead yet," Blaise wheezed at Eleanor, out of breath from his quick descent to the hard floor, "though I wouldn't be opposed-"

"I'd be careful, Zabini." Draco warned, jabbing the end of his wand further into Blaise's neck.

"Don't underestimate me." Blaise stated, although his position on the ground and his slurred words made him seem like less than a real threat. There was a tangible sadness hanging in the air at the disheveled and manic state of a once beloved friend.

"Enough." A voice barked from down the hall, commanding and firm. "Mr. Malfoy, please rise off of Mr. Zabini." Dumbledore strode over to the trio in a quick fashion. Draco hesitated for a moment, waiting until the professor was nearer to them.

"He advanced first," Eleanor explained quickly, "Draco was just acting in defense."

"Coward," Blaise coughed from the floor when Draco pushed slightly too hard on his chest to stand up and face their Headmaster. He rolled his eyes at his pathetic, drunk housemate.

"There is no excuse for fighting in the hallways, I hope you know this." Dumbledore stated, watching as Blaise rolled onto his knees and began to rise up.

"He hit Eleanor." Draco said, "And I didn't see any prefects or professors strolling the halls for protection, so what was I supposed to do? Just let him hit her?"

"I only hit women who deserve it." Blaise spat, finally on his feet but was teetering noticeably.

"Did you learn that one from your father or from Voldemort?" Eleanor took a step of advancement before Draco shot his arm out to stop her.

"Miss Cordarri, that is enough." Dumbledore enunciated clearly. All three watched Blaise keel over and throw up on his shoes and begin groaning slightly. "You should all be in bed." Dumbledore instructed and began turning away.

Draco stood dumbfounded for only a moment before shooting out: "Aren't you going to do anything?"

"What do you suggest I do, Mr. Malfoy?" Dumbeldore asked calmly. "I witnessed you attacking an ailing Mr. Zabini, you informed me that it was in defense of Miss Cordarri, and I believe you. Now that an all out brawl has been thwarted, the best thing for each of you is to retire."

"You aren't going to punish him?" Draco's voice was starting to sound desperate.

"I believe the headache and guilt he will face in the morning is a natural consequence, don't you agree?"

Draco ground his teeth together, as if he were holding angry words in his throat. He thought for a few moments, then decided to release them despite the consequences he might face. "You never do anything. I have told you on two occasions about Death Eaters in this school. I have gone against everything I was raised to believe, I have sacrificed my entire life because I was told to trust that you would keep me, Eleanor, and Harry safe. I trusted that, and yet every time I have gone against my better judgement and told you about the dangers we are in, you leave us unsupported and unprotected. I just do not understand it."

"Draco," Eleanor spoke softly, putting a soft hand on his shoulder, unsure of how she felt about his diatribe. She couldn't argue that he had made some very good points, it felt like they were being hung to dry.

"I'm sorry you feel that the safety of Hogwarts is on your shoulders, Mr. Malfoy. I assure you that it is still my burden to bear." Dumbledore said quietly after a few moments. "I will have Severus collect Mr. Zabini as I do not believe you will be willing to help him back to your shared dorms. Please feel free to stay on the cot that I know Miss Cordarri has in her office if you feel so inclined to stay away from your housemates for the evening."

He then turned and began to disappear down the corridor. Blaise quietly got back onto the floor and laid his head on the cool stones and closed his eyes. Draco gave him a swift kick to the arm, which went unacknowledged, and turned into the greenhouse with Eleanor.

"That was the worst apology I have ever heard," Draco muttered as he entered her office and flicked on a lantern, "and I should know, I've given some pretty awful ones." He began discarding his robes and looking in Eleanor's desk drawers where he knew she kept extra clothes for the both of them. He began changing into loungewear angrily while Eleanor stood speechless in the doorway. "Why does Potter worship him so much?"

Eleanor paused a moment, waiting to see if Draco had more to say, or if he was truly looking for an answer. She was, in truth, very surprised to see Dumbledore be that dismissive towards Draco. A simmering, persistent anger burned in her stomach while she watched him pace.

"What he just did was very wrong," Eleanor started, biting her thumbnail in frustration, then removing it from her mouth as quickly as it went there, trying to rid herself of the habit, "I think it's hard for us to see his foresight. The whole Order trusts him, and I don't know, I feel like if we can't trust Dumbledore, we have to at least trust Remus and Sirius, who both trust him."

"I knew you were going to say that," Draco huffed, unconvinced. Another silence fell over them, both feeling uncomfortable and frustrated with what just transpired, and neither knowing quite what they needed from each other.

Blaise began yelling loudly outside the greenhouse then, and Snape's sneering insults came lashing back at him. Eleanor stiffened as they both listened to Blaise yelling about how important and powerful he was, about how he had been trusted, and about how no one could see how completely indispensable he had become.

A solitary tear fell onto Eleanor's cheek while his incoherent yells became quieter as he walked further away from the greenhouse.

"Are you hurt?" Draco asked immediately when he noticed her quiet tears, he shot up from the bed and collected her face in his hands, inspecting the red mark that covered her cheek, but was fading. "Are you scared?" He asked, softer.

Eleanor shook her head once. It was grief that swirled in her chest, and relief, and anxiety. She didn't know how to explain her feelings to Draco, she wasn't sure how to tell him about the bittersweet ache in her heart.

The only explanation she could offer for her tears was: "That was almost you."

* * *

**Quick note: **It's officially been one year since I first posted Sun, Moon, and Stars on FF.n. I'm honestly kind of shocked it's been so long, and yet it all feels really new. I just want to say thank you for the continued support, I'm so appreciative of every fav, follow, and review. I'm happy my story is reaching people, and I can only hope I'm continuing to do right by this piece and producing something you all are happy to read!


	43. Chapter 43

Whether it was due to pride, fear, or anger, Draco did not return to the Slytherin dormitories. He had removed his belongings from the room he shared with Blaise, Theodore Nott, Crabbe and Goyle and shoved them unceremoniously into Eleanor's overcrowded greenhouse study.

Eleanor watched helplessly as he silently rearranged shelves of newly growing plants, Eleanor's decrepit desk, the cot, and now his oversized trunk.

"Is this rational?" Eleanor couldn't stop herself from asking while Draco tried yet another layout so that everything fit in the tiny room.

"Do you really need the desk in here?" Draco asked, not hearing - or refusing to acknowledge - her question.

"I mean, it is my office." Eleanor pointed out. Draco scoffed at this.

"Do you need a whole office? You're still welcome in your common room."

"So are you." Eleanor shot back. "You are the one isolating yourself, no one asked you to do this."

"You just don't understand." Draco muttered, beginning to push his large trunk around the wandbox sized room for what seemed like the millionth time.

"I do understand," Eleanor began to plead, "Draco, I know you must feel helpless right now, but I don't know if cutting off all of your friends will make everything better." Eleanor paused before adding. "Believe me, I've tried it. When everything was shitty and I was sad, I did the same thing. It doesn't help."

"That's not what I'm doing, Eleanor." Draco grunted. Eleanor rolled her eyes, his use of her full name giving her insight to the great annoyance he must have been feeling. "I'm choosing to not live with people who want my girlfriend dead. If Dumbledore isn't going to remove him from the castle, then I will remove myself."

"He isn't trying to kill me, if anything he would be trying to kill Harry." Eleanor tried to reason. "Voldemort won't want me dead until he gets access to my money, and we've made it really hard for that to happen. He was just trying to get a rise out of you."

"Why are you trying to convince me to go back?" Draco finally snapped. Eleanor sighed, she could see in his eyes that he was looking for a fight. Not with her specifically, but he had so much pent up anger and she was the closest person in the moment. Though she was proud, and hated backing down from conflict, she knew that arguing was not Draco's intention and definitely not what he needed.

"I guess I'm not," Eleanor said quietly, entering the threshold of the office and putting her hands on either side of Draco's face. "I just don't want you to be uncomfortable, or damage your relationship with your other friends."

"They've made their choice, they've sided with him." Draco was still huffing, but beginning to loosen up under Eleanor's gentle touch.

"Have they told you that?" Eleanor asked.

"They don't have to say it, I feel it." Draco seethed. "The way they look at me, the way they avoid me. It's been slowly happening all year, but after everything with Katie Bell, it was like I was alone there." He slumped down onto the cot, and Eleanor went with him, keeping her hand firmly wrapped around his. "Slytherins protect their own. Everyone says that their house is like their family, but with Slytherin that's especially true. It doesn't matter if they are 'right' or 'fair', if it's your family, you protect them. I didn't protect Blaise, at least not in the way they wanted. I'm a traitor."

"Draco," Eleanor's soft voice brought his eyes to hers, "there is a reason you did what you did. It isn't because you're a bad Slytherin. There are reasons behind the choices you made."

"Of course there is," Draco's words came out in almost a whisper, "I don't have a family anymore. At least not in the way I had one. Everything unraveled. All my life it was me and my parents and you and your parents and everything else just fell into place around us. Then you lost your parents because of what my father did, and then my mother had to leave. I lost almost everything in one full sweep, because of my father. My allegiances had to change because the biggest threat to my family was my father. Now, I just have you to protect."

"I'm flattered that you think I have that much of an influence over you," Eleanor chuckled quietly and kissed Draco's hand swiftly, "I think your reasoning is partly honest, but it wasn't just me. You saw a lot of flaws in what your family had always been loyal to. You stayed true to what you knew was right, rather than what everyone around you wanted you to believe."

"Sounds like a Gryffindor." Draco chuckled, nudging Eleanor's shoulder playfully.

"I don't think that's a bad thing."

"Of course you don't." Draco rubbed his tired eyes. "I guess since I'm a full blown turncoat now, might as well be a Gryffindor too."

"You're so dramatic." Eleanor rolled her eyes and gave Draco a soft peck on the cheek. "Now, I think if we move the cot to the back wall there will be plenty of room for your trunk and my desk."

* * *

Draco fell more in step with Eleanor's friends every day. He still rarely ate in the Great Hall, relying on Eleanor to deliver him food or Dobby to present him with something. Dobby rather enjoyed helping out Draco and Eleanor when he could, especially after Draco apologized profusely about the way he treated the House Elf in his youth and began gifting him trinkets whenever he saw him.

Hogwarts was lit aflame with wild gossip when Draco began sitting next to Harry, Ron, or Hermione in classes. Eleanor, only taking two classes in common with her friends, was often absent from the classes the other four shared, which made the phenomenon even stranger to the Hogwarts student body.

All eyes went immediately to Draco whenever Neville or Ron made a mistake in class. They were all waiting to see his snide remark, but he sat as still as a statue. A silent observer. Snape began sneering in the direction of Draco in the same way he did to Harry, Ron, and Hermione. In some ways, Draco felt more isolated than ever, and in others he felt very secure. Though he had struggled for the acceptance of Eleanor's friends, he never feared losing that support once he had it. He knew that despite how terrible he had been in the past, he had true friends now who wouldn't make him prove himself at every turn. Despite his parents being out of the picture, he knew that Sirius and Remus would protect him. He knew he was safe even if he didn't feel particularly comfortable. Eleanor always assured him that those feelings were just proof of him growing.

He didn't always feel like he was growing though. He often felt so stuck in his fear and anger that he was paralyzed. There were nights he couldn't sleep because all he could think about was Blaise. He would think about him with regret, sadness, and anger - always anger. He felt guilty that Blaise was forced into this role. Eleanor had been right, that was supposed to be him. If everything had worked the way Voldemort wanted, Draco and Eleanor would likely be his pawns in that moment. Draco felt responsible, like he should have been able to stop Blaise from falling trap to the back up plan. Draco felt anger at Blaise, Dumbledore, Voldemort, his father. Everyone. It burnt him up inside.

At the root of his anger was always fear. Fear for his life, and for Eleanor's. Fear of what was to come. Dumbledore was teaching Harry more and more each day and with every new revelation about Voldemort, the impending war felt like it was coming closer everyday. Draco often sat awake and wished that Eleanor was less proud, less courageous, less loyal. If she could be less of what she was, then perhaps she would be open to the idea of running.

Running and hiding seemed ideal to Draco. He wished to go live with his mother in Malibu, doing the mundane Muggle things, and never thinking for a second about how the Wizarding World was imploding. He would gather Eleanor up and take her away and he wouldn't think twice.

But that was always the difference between the two of them. Eleanor always commented on how he was a newly adopted Gryffindor, but he would never be brave enough to face injustice for the sake of facing it. He was brave enough to defend those he loved, his family. If Eleanor was choosing to face the world head on, to fight for what was right, he would have to stay and fight for her. They would do the same thing with entirely different motives for doing it.

"Malfoy," Harry whispered one late night of studying in the library. Draco was shaken from his thoughts and looked over at Harry. Hermione and Ron left earlier in the evening to complete their Prefect rounds, and Eleanor had fallen asleep on top of a mound of papers that Professor Sprout had given her to grade. "Have you ever heard of this spell?" Harry asked, sliding his potions textbook across the table. Draco rubbed his tired eyes quickly before focusing them on the scribble in the margins of the book.

"Sectumsempra," Draco read to himself quietly, "it says it's for enemies."

"That's why I haven't practiced it with anyone." Harry let out an unamused chuckle. "I asked Hermione about it, but she didn't know, I thought you might."

"I'm flattered that I'm the one you go to regarding all things Dark Magic, but I don't have an answer for you." Draco said. Harry's shoulders sagged slightly and returned his eyes to the book.

"Do you think it's really Dark Magic?" Harry asked in a low voice.

"Well, I don't think it's healing." Draco shot sarcastically, causing Harry to roll his eyes.

"Shut up, Malfoy." Harry brushed off and returned to reading his book.

"I never thought you would be a potions enthusiast." Draco observed. "You were always rather rubbish at it."

"I had a rubbish professor," Harry shot back without a second thought, his eyes never leaving the page.

"I don't really think that Slughorn is the height of academia, though, do you?"

"He really isn't as thick as everyone makes him out to be," Harry sighed, finally meeting Draco's eyes, "I am supposed to get some information from him, and each time I try he completely shuts me out."

"What kind of information?"

"A memory, between him and Tom Riddle. Dumbledore thinks it's the key to defeating him. Slughorn is embarrassed that he told him about a piece of dark magic so he altered his memory and I'm just trying to find out what that piece of dark magic was."

"Does it matter, isn't all of his magic dark? Why would one specific spell make a difference?"

"I don't know, I just trust Dumbledore."

Draco scoffed at his answer, earning a glare from Harry. "Okay, I know that you worship him and that he's the reason Gryffindor keeps winning the House Cup so you have to continue grovelling, but whenever I have told him about Death Eaters actually being inside the school, he hasn't given a damn about it. Makes it kind of hard for me to trust him." Draco sighed. "Maybe if you told him the same information he would believe it, but, I don't know."

"He knows what he is doing." Harry assured.

"Okay, well I hear Katie Bell is supposed to come back soon, so we can get a first person testimony to who cursed her and see if it lines up with what I said." Draco held onto his quiet anger for a few moments, looking away from Harry and glancing at Eleanor, eyes closed and breathing deeply. Her quill was held gently between her fingers, and some ink spots were drying on her sweater sleeves.

"No one is going to hurt her." Harry promised quietly, watching Draco watch Eleanor. "She's my family too. You aren't the only one who's worried.."

Draco blinked away the memories of Blaise hitting her, he tried to shake the guilt and anger he felt when he thought of that moment. But he couldn't be rid of it, it simmered inside of him. He knew it was nothing compared to what Blaise could do, what he might want to do.

If it came to that, Draco knew that he would protect Eleanor with everything he had.

* * *

**Hope everyone **is staying safe during this crazy time. Let me know what you think about this latest installment!


	44. Chapter 44

"Have the boys been up yet?" Eleanor wondered out loud to Hermione one morning while the pair studied alongside Ginny.

"I've never known them to be early risers." Ginny snickered to herself.

"They're usually up by now, though." Hermione reasoned, grabbing her bag and digging through it. "Let's check on them and see." She pulled out a dingy piece of parchment and tapped on it with her wand, mumbling the enchantment quietly. She unfolded it for all three of them to look at.

"I'll put a sickle on them still being in bed." Ginny offered.

"I'll put mine on the Great Hall, eating." Eleanor returned. "Where's your money going, 'Mione?"

"The Hospital Wing," Hermione blurted, though not in speculation. She stated it with disbelief as she shot up and began towards the portrait hole.

"Mischief Managed." Eleanor shot quickly at the map before darting after Ginny and Hermione.

"What's got you all in a rush?" Seamus Finnegan asked as he passed them through the entrance to the Common Room.

"I suppose we've got a man down in the Hospital Wing," Eleanor panted out quickly as she sped to keep up.

Harry was sitting by Ron's unconscious body when the three girls arrived. Ginny and Hermione rushed to his side while Eleanor stood at the foot of the bed with Harry.

"What happened?" Eleanor asked, looking at Harry curiously.

"I don't know, he was poisoned." Harry answered.

"Poisoned?" Hermione's head whipped around to look at Harry. "Why? By who?"

"We don't know. We were having a drink with Slughorn and he just dropped. I fed him a bezoar, and he seems to be recovering now."

Hermione let out a small breath of relief. "Quick thinking, Harry." She complimented softly, her eyes returning to the bed-ridden Ron. Eleanor and Harry exchanged a swift, knowing look and looked on quietly.

Quietly until Lavender came bursting through the door calling out Ron's pet names for him. Eleanor rolled her eyes at the falsely high pitch of her voice.

"What are you doing here?" She demanded loudly of Hermione. Blood rushed to Hermione's face as she stood over Ron's bed indignantly.

"I could ask you the same." Hermione shot back.

"I happen to be his girlfriend,"

"Well, I happen to be his...friend." Hermione retorted after a bit of stumbling over her words.

Lavender scoffed at Hermione. "You haven't spoken to him in weeks, but now you care since he is suddenly all interesting."

"Interesting? He was poisoned!" Hermione's voice raised louder with each word. Harry and Eleanor watched in disbelief as the two continued making snide remarks at each other when Ron began mumbling in his unconscious state.

"See, he's asking for me." Lavender pushed past Hermione and sunk down next to Ron, cradling his head in her arms and comforting him in a sickly juvenile voice.

"Her..mio...ne." Ron croaked out, Eleanor's heart stopped and her eyes shot to her friend who looked stiff as a board. "Hermione." Ron stated, clearly this time. Lavender, for once in her life, didn't say a word. She simply fled the Hospital Wing, her cries following after her.

Hermione could only smirk.

* * *

After having Hermione explain exactly how he and Lavender broke up for what felt like the thousandth time, with no end to the snow he was making fall from the ceiling, Eleanor, Harry, Draco, and Hermione had all concluded that they should unpack their winter clothes and prepare for the the icy freeze of a break up. Ron didn't seem to be too torn up over the whole affair, rather very confused.

But all of their love problems were put on hold when a group of girls entered the Great Hall.

Katie Bell's appearance in the Great Hall had three young men extremely on edge. Upon her arrival, Harry and Draco made eye contact, a silent agreement that they would get to the bottom of what happened to her. Blaise, at the lonely end of the Slytherin table, looked more unhinged than ever. His eyes darted around the Great Hall, it looked as though he was trying to see if anyone was noticing him.

Harry began walking over to Katie with a quick pace, Draco decided to join him despite Eleanor rolling her eyes and trying to force him to sit down again. Draco shrugged off Eleanor's clinging arm uncaringly. Eleanor groaned dramatically at this and turned to Hermione. "No one ever listens to me." She grumbled into her oatmeal.

"Katie, how are you?" Harry greeted hurriedly.

"I know what you're going to ask, Harry, and I have no idea what happened." Katie responded with regret.

"Do you have any memory of who cursed you?" Draco asked. Katie's eyes shot suspiciously from Harry to Draco, and she sneered lightly at the latter. The last time she was at Hogwarts, Harry and Draco were silently civil, but never friendly. She'd never spoken a kind word to Draco, or he to her; and certainly nothing off of the Quidditch Pitch.

"No," She said unsurely, "why do you care?"

"It's okay, he's helping us."

"_Helping_?" Katie asked in disbelief. "Well, I'm sorry I can't be of more help to you both, but if I remember anything, I'll let you know." As soon as Katie finished talking, all three of their heads darted to the entrance of the Great Hall. Several students shouted at a fellow classmate who'd pushed his way through them. Draco began after him before even Harry could.

He ignored Eleanor calling for him as he passed her, he ignored Harry's footsteps behind him, he ignored everything around him and inside him that told him to stop or think rationally. He was enraged. All he could think was that Blaise was a Death Eater. Blaise, who was one of the people he trusted most in the world, had hexed a classmate, wiping her memory and nearly killing her. He had made threats against Eleanor, and even laid hands on her. He was working tirelessly for the man who wanted to hold Eleanor and him against their wills because of their money and information. He was trying to get Death Eaters into the school to do just that. Draco had felt like he'd lost Eleanor before, but he had never felt her so close to slipping from his fingertips than he did as he stared down the back of his once best friend.

And Draco felt responsible.

Draco's fatal flaw had been hoping for the best for his friend and not condemning him the second he'd asked for help. Draco was angry. He was angry at Blaise, angry with himself, even angry with Eleanor for making him the kind of person who put their feelings before their brain. If he'd remained hard, ruthless, unmoving, then Eleanor would be safe. But she wasn't. Her biggest threat was sharing their hallways, their lives, standing in the bathroom, right in front of Draco.

"What did you do to her, Zabini?" Draco demanded, wand in hand but not yet pointed.

"She was a means to an end," Blaise shot back.

"And what end is that, huh? Eleanor given over to Voldemort so she can be tortured and manipulated into giving him whatever he wants? Where is your loyalty?"

"Don't talk to me about loyalty." Blaise growled. "Where is yours? We've been mates since we were kids, and I needed you, and you were snogging her and running off to be with Potter." Blaise's eyes looked glazed over, almost crazed.

"Voldemort, Death Eaters, all they've ever done is take people away from me. Darius and Olga were like my parents too, and my actual parents are imprisoned or in hiding, I had to flee my own home so I could cling to the one person I have left. And they're trying to take her from me too. I can't help you, friends or not."

"You would throw everything away for her? Be in the Dark Lord's bad graces to attempt to keep her safe? It won't work. She's too important. He'll get to her either way."

Draco gripped his wand tighter, aware of Harry's quiet presence in the shadows, but was unsure if Blaise also knew he was there. "Why is she so important to him?"

Blaise laughed loudly at Draco's question. "After all of this, you think I'd tell you?"

"After all of this, I think I deserve an honest answer." Draco spit. "I've given you more help than I should have."

Blaise looked almost hurt at Draco's answer. He'd never felt abandoned by Draco before, the two were never particularly affectionate friends, but he'd always known he could count on Draco. The whole year, while Blaise had descended into chaos and madness, he'd felt Draco slipping away. Now it was solidified. Blaise was alone. Anger bubbled up inside Blaise's chest, and he grew more spiteful.

"The Dark Lord has plans for her. She's from a powerful bloodline, more powerful than yours, more powerful than mine. Her grandparents were devout followers of the Dark Lord, legends. Having a Cordarri on his side would make him that much more powerful. He would do anything to get that mark on her arm. Think of the people she could get close to, be forced to kill. It's a shame she loves you so much, she'd do anything to keep you safe. Even more to keep whatever little blonde headed shit you two would create safe." Draco could have screamed, he wanted to ditch the wand and just beat Blaise with his two fists. "Personally, I hope he tortures her a bit first. I'd give anything to hear that bitch scream. It'd be like music."

"Sectumsepra!" A loud yell erupted from deep in the throat. Draco's eyes widened as the wand spark flew and hit Blaise square in the chest, sending him flying backwards and causing immediate blood to start seeping through his shirt.

"Potter," Draco breathed out, "what did you do?"


End file.
